By the time we finally finished tomorrow's work, it was time to leave, and the five of us dudes turned our route toward Istiklal. We got off the bus at those stops that had been moved underground. How much could a place change, really? This wasn't Taksim anymore; it felt more like the Sirkeci underground bazaar.
I quickly remembered we were here to have fun tonight. Neither the concreted square nor the nostalgic tram line that looked like it was torn from a synthetic soccer pitch could ruin my mood.
Swaying slightly, we drifted up to the door of the tavern where we'd spend the evening. Even though I found them incredibly strange at first, these guys' conversations had gradually started to grow on me. It wasn't really their fault; with the education they received and the environments they were in, this was as much as they could develop themselves.
In a way, these people were one of the main factors in my plan to escape abroad. I was terrified that, eventually, I would become a prisoner of the same inescapable vicious cycles just like them.
"We bought a house, I need to work overtime to pay it off," "It's a long time until the car loan is finished, let's tighten our belts," "Our kid isn't bright anyway, he's not going to study"—I wanted to get far away before these phrases became a part of my daily life.
While I was occupied with these thoughts, the hot appetizers arrived. Forks began rising and falling over the table as everyone except me tried to line their stomachs for the drinking ahead. By the way, I have absolutely no relationship with alcoholic beverages. Everyone who hears this initially gets the impression it's for religious reasons, but as they get to know me and see I have no relationship with religions either, they accept the truth of the matter.
I literally couldn't drink. I've tried every kind, but it was no use; the moment it poured into my mouth from the glass, it came right back up. This didn't seem like it would change on my farewell night either. The smell of anise that filled my nose the moment the seventy-cl bottle was opened was enough for me.
With the hunger of the entire day, I dug into the appetizers. I was going to handle the drink situation with spicy turnip juice. We were past our twenties now; I wasn't in any state to order a cola or a yellow soda at a tavern like a kid who came to a tea garden with his mom.
My coworkers had already enthusiastically downed their first glasses and were clinking their glasses with all their might before drinking the second ones. What kind of joy was in them? Damn, were you all that sick of me?
Of course, that wasn't the truth of the matter, I understood everything. They were people wearing blinders. No matter how much I wanted to explain things to them, they wouldn't accept it, so after a while, I had given up on throwing this reality in their faces.
Looking at them now, it was as if they had stolen a pinch of pleasure from the vast blue oceans where only peace and happiness existed, far outside their miserable lives. I had no other choice but to go along with them. Anyway, I had also gotten a bit dizzy ever since the belly dancer got on our table.
Now I understand the state of mind of those men who throw money around. Disregarding my own poverty, I had slipped a fifty-lira bill to the beauty who knocked me out with her hips. The man of the night was none other than me. I was the one who belly-danced the most with this enchantress who danced by whipping her waist-length hair towards my face.
Time flowed like water, and we poured out whatever worries we had as if it were the last day of the world.
"Gentlemen, we're closing now!"
We were swimming in such a wave of happiness that we only realized we were singing and playing entirely to ourselves after the waiter's warning in an embarrassed tone. Them surrounding me happened exactly right after these words. Before I could understand what was going on, there was a glass of straight raki in front of my mouth.
"Come on, boy, down it in one gulp!"
Big Bro Muharrem had waited and waited, and at the last moment, he was after some mischief again. This was the moment I was doomed. The old man's insistence was famous; once he latched onto something, there was no way to escape him.
"Big Bro, don't, you know I just can't drink!"
I was trying to escape my fate. This action of mine, which was synonymous with rowing against the current, didn't have the slightest effect on the wily old bastard.
"Drink it, you little whoremonger, who ever died from a glass of raki!"
It was officially over for me. I gritted my teeth and downed the glass in one gulp the moment I took it. As we left, the place was erupting with applause, you'd think I did some profound shit. Annoyed, I yanked on the handle of the outer door that was given a nostalgic vibe with four small panes of glass.
The night was clearly over. The winds, heralds of the morning that fill a person with a chill, were hitting my face. With my body temperature raised from long hours of alcohol, heat, and excitement, I was forced to sneeze violently after a brief altercation with the colliding breeze.
"Bless you!"
"Live well!"
My coworkers, who were completely wasted, shouted in unison. How strange it was that such a tiny event became the polish for their joy. These men, normally perpetually tense with faces that could sour milk, were now as cheerful as kids going to the corner store to buy soda after playing a neighborhood match.
"Thank you, all together!"
This phrase is a classic for us. No matter who says it, you say it back just to be polite, but maybe for the first time in my life, it came out of my mouth so fully and sincerely.
I worked, I struggled, I saved up money for my dream. My visa application, my language school, everything is ready, and starting tomorrow, I'm flying away like a bird to faraway places. My last night was ending with seeing the warm faces of the people I had worked shoulder-to-shoulder with for two years, sometimes fighting them, sometimes watching their backs. Even if I died after this point, I could die without regrets.
"Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar."
"Whoa, is it already time for the morning call to prayer?"
Someone in the group spoke in astonishment. How completely the man had lost the concept of time when he found a little opportunity to have fun in his boring life.
"Bwwwoooooooooowwwwwwww!"
Right as the call to prayer ended, a terrifying horn sound was heard. It sounded like the kind of instrument used in castles to announce to everyone that enemy forces were approaching.
Immediately after, I was startled by the sound of someone collapsing to my right. When I quickly turned in that direction, I found Big Bro Muharrem kneeling on the ground, his hands open, praying.
"My God, forgive me, pardon the sins I have committed. You are great, You are almighty!"
He was praying with such speed and exhaling so heavily that the man, whose mustache ends were yellowed from cigarettes, was about to make my mind, which had slightly cleared, drunk again from the smell of raki mixing into the air.
The next second, I found the entire team making the same movements. What happened that they suddenly started worshipping in terror out of nowhere?
I would be freed from this thought occupying my mind when the rays of the newly rising sun hit my head, because I had slowly begun to understand what was happening.
Everyone has something they are good at in this life. Some have the ability to befriend numbers, others words. As for me, my inherent sense of direction allowed me to stand out from other people; I could tell you the directions at a single glance, like a walking compass.
This was why I knew I was witnessing the end of a morning that continued with the same momentum as the joyous night, by watching the sun rise from the west.
I don't remember what happened after that at all. When I opened my eyes, I was in a place where people of every race and nation were packed like sardines. The ground was dry, the earth cracked, and the sun, which was in the sky the last time I remembered, was now almost right above my head, plunging its scorching rays like swords.
Everything I convinced myself would never happen had happened. I guess the apocalypse had broken out, and all of us humans had been gathered to wait for the moment of reckoning.