Do you think I should have a sit down with my parents and talk about the possibility of their relatives coming to hound me because of my relationship with Fin - the Merwe family? Though I can't associate myself with the family yet...or ever, depending on the reception I'm going to receive.
According to Fin last night, I'll be received well, from his mother's words... I'm only associated with Fin.
I've been thinking about this all morning...
Thank goodness, my husband sparred my poor body last night...
(◔‿◔)
Probably not as surprised as me...right?
All morning, yes...I've been thinking about it all morning - back to the point - but I don't think it's necessary, the me that Fin says is too soft when handling things doesn't think it's necessary.
It's been Ty and I, making up for lost time. When I woke this morning, Fin told me to be ready in the afternoon, he'll come and pick me up... he has something to show me. So,
I took Ty out for a walk, we returned and have been playing in the garden since.
Nope, don't give me that stinky eye. I love my poodle very much... I'm not using him to pass time, I have plenty of things I could do to pass time and being with Ty isn't one of them. You're the bad one for thinking it - not me! Ty and I are family...we can never get tired of each - well, he wasn't enthusiastic in the beginning...I showed him the direction of Sara Tilli's house... see how Ty and I are family, he'll turn on me for his love.
"..."
I guess we're both using each other.
Anyway...
How do I breach the topic? If Fin is saying they're coming, he can't just be saying...he must be sure they'll arrive and I don't want to be caught off guard, meeting strangers and treating them such, only to find out we're related.
"Trent." I turn my head to the sound of the voice, and Ty whines... he's the jealous type - or maybe because I'm holding the ball? I through the ball and he continues whining... okay, he's jealous - jealous of Lydia.
My morning has been peaceful so far...why would she ruin it?
"Don't give me that look, I'm not here to bother you. I want to apologize to you before I leave..." I almost hurt myself turning towards her too quickly - what?
Which part is like pie falling from the sky? The apologizing or the leaving...both combined - a whole pie falling from the sky?
"You...you want to apologize to me?" Don't blame my skepticism, her whole family decided I'm a villain of their lives and is out to get me. They saw the light?
"Hmm. Liv always lived in her own world, I guess we couldn't accept she wasn't well and indulged her when we should've gotten her help."
She looks up, heaves a long sigh and looks at me. Her eyes...
"My mother left when I was about ten, Liv and Mikayla four... they're not supposed to remember when that young but Liv, she wasn't the same after that. My dad blamed himself and pampered the twins...
"It became the norm, Liv especially. Last year, she came home a wreck, never like we'd seen before. We asked her what happened and...
"You know the rest."
She lets out another long sigh and doesn't continue. Ty goes to her, rubs on her legs and she bends down to pick him up.
"I won't make excuses. We were wrong. I'm sorry for all of it, in Mikayla's behalf too. You can trust me, she won't bother you from now on." Well...
This took an unexpected turn.
What am I supposed to say? Am I supposed to say anything?
"You and I are going to be related, through the baby and I'd hate for my child to not know his own family because of me..."
Ha. Colour me wonderfully surprised, when she has a natural look on her face, not the overly-nauseating "I'm kind and timid" look, she has a swell personality, kind of not so repulsing.
Argh... I'm sick, aren't I? I just glimpsed a positive outlook at Lydia Quinn!
"I don't know how this is going to play out in the end but... I'd really like your dad to be part of my baby's life..." I interrupt her with a laugh and she gives me a look,
"Sorry!" I couldn't keep it in, my dad - part of the baby's life?
"You know what I mean. I don't want him to be ostracized by you and your mother." I wouldn't but my mother...
"You keep saying he." I say amused. She's being civil, I can be too...
See? At least, I don't get from her those feelings she roused in me previously. My instincts are never wrong, I'm attuned to people's feelings towards me like that. It's a gift...not really - long story.
"I have a good feeling about he." She gives me a smile, patting Ty - who's looking overly comfortable. The dog! ಠ_ಠ
Excuse my language.
Wow. So pretty...and she has a dimple. This is my first time seeing her like this... my dad's taste is really topnotch - honestly!
"My dad agreed to you leaving?" He wouldn't... would he?
"Yeah. He knows my family and I have problems, and are trying to work them out." He does?
"He knows your family?" He does? Then, wouldn't it mean he knows why...
"Yes, believe it or not, your father's relationship and mine isn't what you think, I never hid anything from him."
She...she hasn't? Then, wouldn't it mean... mean my father knew what they were up to...up to all along?
He knew?
I take a couple of steps back... he knew? The colour has drained from my face. How could he..?
"Trent?" Lydia puts Ty down and comes to me, I avoid the hand she outstretched with another couple of steps back,
"You mean...he knew?" my voice is low, barely a whisper, I'm more talking to myself than her but she hears me and colour drains from her face,
"N-no. You don't understand. Trent, it's not like that. From the very beginning, he believed in you and vouched for you. I-I-I made him promise." She murmurs towards the end and I grimace.
He knew?
If you put two and two together, Mikayla got together with Sebastian before our engagement broke off, Sara Tilli's shenanigans, the rumours, the fashion show, Sebastian's incident at the gala, the tabloids...
I bet they ran everything by him before making a move and he...he allowed it? My father?
I can't breathe. My thoughts are too loud...I can't breath. The surroundings are spinning... I fall to my knees, I can't breathe. I'm clutching my chest...
"Trent!"
I can't breathe. My head's too heavy, I can't see clearly...
How could he... knowing too well my innocence, how could he allow them the freedom to do whatever they pleased?
"Trent...Trent... look at me, look at me; Trent?" Lydia?
Why's she panicking?
My thoughts are too loud, I'm shaking my head but it's not helping. I'm trying to shake it harder...but I still see them, everything that's happened from the Druid's asking for dowry...
I thought it was weird. Why'd they develop a sudden interest in my father's money and fold that quickly?
N-no, no, no... He wouldn't!
My father knows how to make money and how to make people loose money. He...
I put my head between my legs and rock, back - forth, forth - back, it's not helping... the thoughts won't stop playing in my head.
All the people I grew up with, one by one starting to avoid me and choosing Sebastian, Sara Tilli moving next door - yapping about this and that, calling me names, Mikayla...
He knew, he knew it all beforehand and allowed it to happen?
"Trent... can you hear me?"
Then, it didn't bother him...bother him at all that they were... were hurting me...
He approved?
I put my hands on my ears and keep rocking but my thoughts are too loud. I want it to stop..how can I make it stop?
He...
"Trent?" this voice is different from before... deep, thick...steady. I know this voice... I lift my head up, my sight isn't clear, I blink and tears fall down, putting Fin's picture up.
Fin...
I through myself at him and bury my face on the hollow between his neck and shoulder. Steady and safe. I won't cry. I'm never crying because of them. I made Fin a promise.
My head's clearing, I'm putting all those things at the furthest back of my mind. Fin bends his head to my ear,
"Feeling better?" whispers. His breath tingles... I nod, he brushes my hair to the side and plants a kiss on my neck.
"Good. I told you to wait for me..." He stands with me in his arms and walks towards the house,
"I was waiting, Ty and me..." We were, playing fetch.
"Then why'd I find you in this state?" Well...
We've reached the house, Lydia's following behind with Ty in her arms.
"Put me down." I wriggle in his arms and he lets me down,
My parents are in the living room. Great. I don't need this right now.
He steps closer to me, towering me and bends down so we're eye to eye,
"You're avoiding the question." he says looking straight into my eyes, I can't avoid him now.
"Lydia and I talked is all. I had an attack while talking and well, you know the rest."
You cannot say I can't lie, I'm just as surprised as you that I can lie without batting an eye. I'm almost proud of myself... almost.
"Oh? Since when do Lydia and you talk?" my eyes jump to Lydia's immediately. Argh...I forgot about that. I almost got away with it too...almost.
"I found out my father knew all along what Lydia and Mikayla were doing to me." I drop my head after that confession.
To think just yesterday I was standing up for them in front of Fin and today I'm using Fin's shoulder to cry on because of something they did...
The wheels of fate really turn their backs on the ungrateful too quickly.
I can't look at Fin in the eye now... what was I saying yesterday?
My parents come rushing to where we're standing after hearing what I said,
"TT..."
"Don't." Fin's voice is stern, he was cold when talking to Sebastian and now... he's don't-waste-my-time firm. No nonsense tone.
He's really handsome...
"Yesterday, I asked you all to leave, if you're not done by the time we get back, I'll take it you're refusing and are trespassing...
"I have the right to defend myself and my wife against trespassers, who knows what they're here to do? I don't want to find you here when we get back."
"You!"
"You!"
I can't defend them today...my craziest self can't defend them. They keep on outdoing themselves on how low they can stoop letting me down, hurting me and yet... this isn't the worst or the second worst thing they've done.
Twentysix years is too long after all.
Fin takes me by the hand and leads the way, I follow him obediently, don't look back even once.
Tell me, when am I going to accept my parents are just expensive decorations?
Maybe the only way to make them useful, other than looking pretty, is chirp away at them, till not a dust of them is left.
Don't you think so?