Chapter 62: Inhuman Wretch
Inhuman Wretch
Breaking into the Department of Policies was a lot easier than it should have been.
It had the reputation of being a veritable fortress, a place protected by Ancient Enchantments and modern Bounded Fields, virtually impenetrable even to the likes of Dead Apostle Ancestors. Created by generations upon generations of Barthomeloi and their allies, it had intricate and impossibly mighty spells, curses, and hexes sunken into its very foundation. It was said, though not confirmed, that every single brick and stone had its own Magic Circle or Rune carved into it. It was supposed to be a place that was virtually unassailable.
Yet despite that fearsome reputation, Shirou and Arcueid could just walk inside without a care, undeterred and unobstructed by the defences that were supposed to stop them.
It was almost embarrassing how easy it was to get inside.
Granted, they were creatures of Arcane power, wielders of actual Divinity who were capable of reshaping the world around them through their mere presence alone, which made Bounded Fields and other such defensive measures rather useless against them, but even so, the redhead found the security to be unforgivably lacking in too many ways.
Bounded Fields were nice and all, but it shouldn't have been that much work to install a few motion sensors as well, or to set up a schedule of human guards, or to install a few more gates and doors with heavy locks, or even to remove all direction signs at night, making sure any intruder would have a devil of a time finding their way in the department's maze-like structure.
His point was, there was a lot that could be improved, and he should definitely take it up with both Lorelei and lady Montmorency. Their safety, and now also that of Ophelia and especially Rin, was at risk, and he could not accept that. It could not be condoned that he and Arcueid could just simply stroll inside like this.
Especially since they also had a disgruntled human Magus in tow.
"I admire your courage, Shirou." Waver grunted when they passed yet another security checkpoint with nary a care, looking extremely tense and getting tenser the deeper they went. "But there is such a thing as being too courageous. 'Foolhardy', they call it."
"I know." Shirou grunted back, none too happy with the current situation either. "I am perfectly aware of the difference between the two."
"Are you? I thought you were, but you're giving me a lot of reasons to doubt it right now." Waver's voice was now little more than a venomous hiss, his displeasure on clear display, and Shirou could not blame him. "It was bad enough when you crashed into my room at this ungodly hour to basically abduct me, but then you dragged me into the Department of Policies on top of that, without lady Barthomeloi's permission!? Are you sure you didn't finally crack from the weight of all your responsibilities?"
"Quite sure-"
"Can you be quiet?" Arcueid interrupted them, shooting a disgruntled look of her own at Waver, who immediately quailed under it. "We're trying to be sneaky here."
Unlike Waver and Shirou, she seemed to be having a lot of fun, hopping and skipping from one hiding place to the next, as if she were in some kind of spy-film. Her efforts were utterly useless of course, as hiding behind a vase only worked in cartoons, but since no one was around to see her, Shirou politely ignored it.
Like he said, she was having fun, and she looked oddly endearing too.
"Ahem." Waver seemed to be of the same opinion, and he clearly had no idea how to react to the fact that the Moon Princess herself could be so strangely adorable. "A-Are you certain this couldn't have waited until the morning, Shirou? It would be a much more reasonable time, and you wouldn't have had to break into the Vice Director's home either. She won't be happy with this, you know."
"I'll be sure to apologise." Shirou sighed, knowing he'd have to get down on his knees for a dogeza after all this. He might not be a proper British gentleman, or even a proper Japanese citizen, but he did know that sneaking into a lady's room at night, without an invitation, was utterly beyond the pale.
Lorelei would be completely within her rights to have him crawl through the dust before she got anywhere close to forgiving him, and that was if she didn't cut off a few limbs first.
Frankly, he too would have preferred to wait until morning to have this discussion, but since he had Arcueid with him, that wasn't an option. Not only was the blonde immensely impatient, though that was definitely enough of a reason on its own, but she was also technically an enemy of the Magus Association, and thus absolutely not someone whom the Vice Director should be seen associating with.
If he brought the White Princess herself into Lorelei's office during the day, someone would almost definitely see them, and that meant Lorelei would have to fight Arcueid to the death or lose face completely. It was her own edict that all who consorted with the Crimson Moon's descendants were to be put to death, and she could not be seen shirking it herself.
Compared to that potential disaster, breaking into Lorelei's department at two in the morning was still the marginally better option. At least now, he only risked Lorelei stomping him into the dirt, rather than another societal upheaval.
And yes, Waver would likely be cross with him too for a while, for kidnapping him from his bedroom without warning or permission, but that at least, he could handle.
Once inside the Department of Policies, he almost made his way up to Lorelei's office by habit, but Arcueid grabbed his shoulder to stop him, shaking her head, before she led him down a flight of stairs instead.
They weren't going to her office after all, but rather to her private quarters.
It was a separate chamber even deeper inside the department than the office, a place where Shirou had never been before, which they could only find by tracking Lorelei's scent. Even Waver, one of the most important members of the Aristocratic Faction, seemed to have no idea where they were going. He too had never been invited to the Queen's private quarters before.
In fact, based on what Shirou could smell, almost no one ever came to those quarters, aside from Lorelei herself of course, as well as lady Montmorency, who was her right hand-woman, and doctor Kix, her personal physician.
From this point onwards, the defences became marginally better, but still not nearly enough to keep them out. It was within mere minutes that they reached their destination, only barred by an ornate door inscribed with countless Seals and Runes. The door to Lorelei's room.
Undoubtedly, it had been secured with Deep Magicks, the sort that would reduce even Dead Apostle Ancestors to ashes. A door made to withstand sieges from armies of Magi, containing Mysteries beyond the imagination of any modern man. Nigh impossible to get past without explicit permission.
Arcueid just pushed it open without a care.
Blissfully unaware of what she'd just done, how many past-Barthomeloi egos she'd just trodden upon, the blonde stepped inside, looking around curiously at the Vice Director's possessions. Lorelei had quite the collection of trinkets and artefacts after all, and while their power might pale in comparison to Arcueid's own, they were still very interesting to look at.
Shirou wasn't at all amused however when she started poking around like a kid in a candy store. It might not be dangerous to her, but it certainly was rude.
"Don't touch that." He hissed, grabbing her wrist just before she could poke an ominous-looking music box. "Don't touch anything. It's not ours and we don't have permission."
"I was just curious." She protested softly, before quickly backing down when he shot her a scathing look. "Oh, alright. I won't touch anything."
"Good." Shirou knew that drawing clear lines in the sand was important when dealing with the Moon Princess, stubborn as she could be, so that was exactly what he did. "Come on, let's find Lorelei."
Finding the Vice Director turned out to be, like so many other things today, surprisingly easy. They only needed to cross a small hallway to find themselves in the drawing room, and it took but a sniff to ascertain that they could find Lorelei behind the third door from the left. In all likelihood, it led straight to her bedroom.
Once again, the magical defences, though powerful, were subpar, barely worth noticing, and Shirou was now actually starting to get concerned. While they were sufficient to hold back enemy Magi and Dead Apostles, the two most pertinent threats in the Moonlit World today, they would do very little against high-rank Phantasmal Beasts, not to mention Servants. Both of those were going to be showing up a lot more in the near future though, which meant these defences were in dire need of a serious upgrade.
If things remained as they were, Lorelei was at real risk of being ambushed in her sleep, which was of course utterly unacceptable.
But then he and Arcueid stuck their heads inside, and Shirou discovered that he might have been worrying a bit too much.
What they found themselves looking at was not a sleeping and defenceless form, vulnerable to ambushes and sudden attacks, but rather a pair of beautiful blue eyes looking straight back at them.
Familiar blue eyes.
It was Lorelei!
She was lying on a queen-sized bed, with her head on a fluffy pillow and her body half-covered by her blanket. She'd clearly been asleep until now, but had awakened when she sensed the presence of intruders in her room.
Shirou was absolutely certain that no alarms had been triggered, and that they hadn't made a single sound, but that didn't matter. No matter how silent he and Arcueid had been, or how much Divinity they possessed, they could not win against Lorelei's instincts, honed over years of hunting down the most terrible prey that the world had to offer. Had they been Dead Apostles or Phantasmal Beasts, they would have died here and now, regardless of how cleverly they'd made their way past the defences. Even Servants would have been in for a considerable battle, one that would alert everything and everyone of their presence here.
Yes, Shirou just knew that if he'd been anyone else, he would have been eviscerated on the spot, and that at least slightly eased his worries over Lorelei's immediate safety.
Though it very much increased his concerns over his own, which could very well be in imminent danger right now. He was still an intruder, an interloper without an invitation, and if there was anything he knew about the brunette, it was her tendency to mete out swift punishment for transgressions.
"Shirou." Lorelei's voice was surprisingly calm though, and he realised she didn't look angry either, not even frustrated. "What brings you here tonight?"
"…?!" Her very reasonable question, unexpected as it was, took him aback, and it took him a number of seconds to formulate a halfway decent reply. "…I wanted to talk to you."
"That is evident." One corner of her mouth curled up into a very slight half-smile, one that only confused Shirou more.
Why wasn't he being blasted with Arcane Magics? Or being thrown out by his ear? Shouldn't he at the very least be getting scolded?
This wasn't going according to plan at all!
"Can I… Can I come in?" He eventually managed to force his mouth to start producing words again, doing his very best to roll with his unexpected fortune. "Or do you need a moment?"
"Why would I need a moment? Come." Continuing to behave in a way completely unlike his expectations, Lorelei allowed him inside right away, and Shirou obeyed at once, stepping inside while gesturing for Waver and Arcueid to wait for a moment.
Fortunately, they listened to him for once.
Meanwhile, Lorelei sat up in bed, casting aside her blanket to get to her feet.
Shirou was almost afraid to look at her. Knowing her preference for… certain types of underwear, he honestly worried she might have been sleeping in sheer lingerie, or perhaps even in her birthday suit. It wouldn't be surprising at all, and he didn't think he'd ever be able to look himself in the eyes again if he inadvertently got an eyeful now.
He resolutely fixed his eyes on a point above her head, and from there, slowly lowered his gaze, preparing to close his eyes immediately should he catch even a glimpse of bare skin below her neck.
He needn't have worried, mercifully.
She was dressed, and what's more, it turned out Lorelei was one of those types who liked to wear a large, loose-fitting shirt to bed. It covered her from her neck to her upper thighs, doing an excellent job of concealing her figure. It might still leave her legs bare, and damn if it wasn't hard to avoid looking at them, but otherwise, it was perfectly proper for a woman of her standing to wear to bed.
Then Shirou noticed what was printed on the shirt, and his heart just melted.
It was a teddy bear. A teddy bear with a wonderful, closed-eye smile and a sleepy look on its adorable face, holding a cup of hot milk in one hand and a blanket in the other, with below it a line of text, saying 'good night, sleep tight' in elegant, flowing letters.
It was too cute for words, and Shirou immediately Traced it, in order to copy it and make his girlfriends wear it too.
Once that was done, he focused on the current situation again.
"I deeply apologise for the intrusion. I swear I wouldn't have come here if I felt I had any other choice."
He started off with a heartfelt apology. He wanted to make sure that she knew he was aware of the sheer impropriety of him intruding upon her personal quarters, to say nothing of its illegality. It had to be made clear that he felt honestly bad about violating her privacy like this.
"Do not let it concern you. You are always welcome here, invited or not."
Which made it a huge shock to hear her laconic reaction, a reaction that flew in the face of everything he'd expected beforehand and suddenly made him question exactly what kind of connection he had with her.
As he'd said before, he was no proper gentleman, but even he knew that intruding upon a lady's bedroom was not the sort of thing that could be brushed off like that, not unless the lady and the gentleman had a certain and special type of relationship.
Only a few weeks ago, he would have chalked it up to their deep friendship, and he would have been honoured by her trust in him, but now, with the warnings of Rin, Sakura, and Ayako in the back of his head, he couldn't help but suspect there might be something here he wasn't seeing. Doubly so because he and Lorelei apparently were close enough for the Burial Agency to honestly believe they were married.
Trusting him was one thing, but actually welcoming him into her bedroom when he barged in unannounced, at night even, was quite another.
…Perhaps the girls were on to something?
"I cannot say I care much for your companion however." The displeasure in Lorelei's voice as she shifted her gaze to Arcueid knocked Shirou out of his thoughts of romance and fraternisation, and he pre-emptively placed himself between the two women, in case they might decide to jump at each other's throats. "Why have you brought that creature here?"
"I'm here because we need to talk, Lei-Lei."
It was the second time that Shirou heard someone refer to the Vice Director by that nickname, and once again, Lorelei barely reacted to it at all. There might have been a minor twitch in her left eye, but that was gone before its existence could be properly confirmed.
"What could a creature like you possibly have to talk about with me?" Lorelei's tone came close to outright scathing, and if it still hadn't been clear enough what she thought about Arcueid after that, the look of pure revulsion on her face would have made it obvious at once.
"Me? Oh, I don't have anything to discuss, especially not with you." The dislike seemed to be mutual, for Arcueid gave Lorelei a harsh look of her own. "It's Shirou who wants to talk to us both."
"Shirou?" The Vice Director's eyes focused on the redhead with a laser-like intensity, demanding he explain why he had brought the Moon Princess to her room. "Is this true?"
There was evidently no love lost between them, though frankly, things were still going a lot better than Shirou had dared to hope. He expected he'd have had to break up a fight by now, so really, a bit of glaring and some insults were hardly a cause for concern.
"I do want to speak to the three of you." He confirmed, before gesturing at Waver to come inside already, feeling faintly relieved when Lorelei only gave the nervous lord a cursory glance before accepting his presence. "It concerns the Return of Mystery."
That properly got their attention, from all three of them, as they turned towards him at once, seemingly forgetting all about their animosity and, in Waver's case, anxiety, on the spot.
"You know more about the Return of Mystery?" Lorelei asked sharply.
"That's what he said, Lei-Lei, you do have to listen." Arcueid didn't miss the opportunity to chide the brunette, and it spoke to the seriousness of the situation that Lorelei completely ignored her.
"I suspected that might be the case." Apparently, Waver had sussed out that Shirou was holding back at least a bit of knowledge, nodding to himself with that signature look of his that showed he had seen this coming. "As a Sorcerer, you must have greater insight into the situation than us Magi-"
"No."
This was actually a bit of a special moment for Shirou. After months of gritting his teeth and nodding whenever someone called him a Sorcerer, he was now at long, longlast free to correct that annoying misconception. He could finally stop lying, at least to these three.
And that was a relief, more than he had expected.
"No?" Lorelei stilled, giving him an odd look. "What do you mean?"
"He is not a Sorcerer." Arcueid looked far too smug as she 'helpfully' elaborated on Shirou's reply, crossing her arms and turning up her nose at her perceived superiority over the two Magi in the room. "I saw that immediately when we first met."
"Nonsense." Waver summarily rejected her claim, though interestingly, he didn't sound entirely sure of himself anymore. "What Shirou has done over the past months cannot be achieved by any form of ordinary Magecraft."
"Ordinary Magecraft?" Shirou couldn't help but ask, lifting an amused eyebrow at the idea that any kind of Thaumaturgy could ever be ordinary in any way, shape, or form.
"For a given value of ordinary." Waver adjusted his statement, giving him a short glare of annoyance, before returning to the matter at hand. "My point is, your feats are well beyond what Magecraft can achieve. What else can they be but True Magic?"
"Yes, what else?" Lorelei mused, giving Shirou a contemplative look of her own. "I have seen you change a Dead Apostle back into a human, and you have demonstrated the ability to travel instantly from one side of the world to another. As lord El-Melloi said, what can that be but True Magic?"
Suddenly, Shirou noticed that neither Lorelei nor Waver seemed truly surprised by his claim, at least not as much as he'd anticipated. Yes, they'd given him a token protest, but they didn't dismiss his claims out of hand as the ravings of a mad Sorcerer, as other Magi would have, nor did they suspect for a moment that he was joking or lying.
Instead, they seemed pensive, awaiting his explanation with great interest. When they asked what kind of power he'd used to substitute True Magic, it wasn't a rhetorical question, but a sincere one.
Evidently, they had already suspected something was amiss with the idea of him being a proper Sorcerer long before he initiated this conversation.
These two… Did anything he did ever truly surprise them?
"Arcueid is right. I am not a Sorcerer." He pulled off the band aid in one go, deciding not to mince words. He had explained the truth of his nature several times already, to his family, so one more time for his friends was not a big deal.
Even if his current audience was a great deal more intimidating than his family.
"Indeed. You are not a Sorcerer." Lorelei seemed almost satisfied with his admission, as if she now had an answer to a question she'd been asking herself for a long time. "Then how do you explain your achievements instead?"
"And how does it tie into the Return of Mystery?" Waver hadn't forgotten Shirou's earlier statement that this discussion also pertained to the increase in the world's Magical Energy, leaning forward in interest. "No, wait one moment, let me think. Are you… Are you a Phantasmal Beast yourself?"
"W-What? No." Shirou nearly laughed at the ridiculous idea, but sobered up quickly when he remembered that the truth was even more ridiculous. "No, I am not a Phantasmal Beast."
"But you aren't human either." Arcueid pointed out, which caused Lorelei to stiffen in alarm. "What exactly are you then?"
Rather than replying in words, Shirou did what he had always done when someone asked that very question. He manifested Mjolnir, the hammer of Thor, a weapon that, if not completely and utterly sealed and inert, radiated unearthliness and divinity like a bonfire radiated heat.
Arcueid, Waver, and Lorelei had all seen the hammer before, during the many battles that Shirou had waged alongside each of them, but only in its sealed, limited form. This time, the redhead boldly unleashed a tiny part of its true aura, showing off just what he held in his hand, and what that made him.
"Ah! I understand!" Arcueid's eyes shone in excitement as she looked at Mjolnir, while Waver and Lorelei gaped at the hammer, sensing yet not understanding the immense alien power that rolled off it in waves.
"You do?" Shirou would not be surprised if she did. She was very knowledgeable despite her flighty attitude, and although she could be a tad naïve sometimes, she was not dumb. "What am I then?"
"You are a god."
She got it in one, though from the expressions on Waver's and Lorelei's faces, both frozen in abject shock, Shirou could see that he nevertheless had a lot of explaining to do.
But first, he should probably serve a few hot beverages, to calm the mood before someone did something they might regret.
"A god." Even as he lifted the cup of extra-strong tea that Shirou had prepared for him to his lips, Waver's hand was noticeably shaking in distress and disbelief. "I knew the world still held many secrets, but this…"
"I know that it is shocking." Shirou nodded, waiting patiently for his friend to compose himself again. "Frankly, I am surprised that you believe me at all."
"I'm not sure I do. I mean no offense, Shirou, but the very idea of you being a god, of anyone in the Modern Age being a god, is ludicrous. I don't want to doubt your words, as I have never known you to be a liar, but right now, I'm waiting for more proof before I can decide one way or the other."
"That is entirely reasonable."
Unknowingly, Waver pretty much parroted what Rin had said when she heard the truth about him for the first time. An unwillingness to dismiss his words as lies or fantasies, yet also an inability to just take him at his word.
Waver and Rin actually had a lot in common with each other in general, now that he thought about it. They were both direct, no-nonsense people, with a healthy scepticism towards any new information, especially something as fantastical as this, yet also a willingness to change their minds and perhaps even apologise should enough evidence be presented to them.
Fortunately, Shirou had plenty of evidence to show.
"Is my word not enough for you, Magus?" Arcueid asked Waver, having already vouched for Shirou's divinity before.
"No, it is not." Waver replied bluntly, which seemed to honestly take her aback, before she pouted at the lord, visibly sulking at his response.
It was an amusing byplay, but Shirou was mainly focused on the only person who hadn't said anything yet.
Since the moment he had revealed his true nature, Lorelei had remained silent, not saying a word as she studied him with cold eyes. She had accepted the cup of tea he'd offered her, which was something at least, but she'd done or said no more. Her demeanour, which had previously been so relaxed around him, was now guarded and cautious, and her expression was bereft of any warmth or fondness.
It wasn't hard to guess what had displeased her so.
His inhumanity.
Lorelei's hatred for the inhuman was both famous and infamous all over the Moonlit World, and now, he had revealed himself to be a nascent god, which was about as far removed from humanity as one could get within the boundaries of the logical world. He was an alien existence, an outsider in the truest sense of the word, painfully similar to a certain moon god they all hated.
In light of that, her reaction was no surprise. He'd known that the reveal would come as an unpleasant shock to her, and he was prepared to deal with her wrath.
Now, he didn't actually expect her to attack him, considering he was no Dead Apostle or other form of bloodsucker, but he would likely get the cold shoulder for quite a while after this.
Which was fair enough.
In any case, now that he'd made sure he wasn't about to be decapitated, he should probably present his evidence and make his case, starting with the first piece.
With a mental command, he lit a fire in the hearth, not using Magical Energy, but his Authority instead. Something he knew that Waver and Lorelei would notice.
Indeed, both the lord and the lady turned towards the fire at once, their eyes hard and analytical, before turning back to him.
"Explain." It was the first thing Lorelei had said to him in a while, and Shirou hurried to obey.
"I made the world bend to my will."
"Authority." Waver needed no more explanation to understand, his hands no longer trembling as he shifted into his researcher-persona. "A power that is based on the privilege of a god to do as they please. The power to realize a result simply because the user has the right to do so, without needing Magical Energy, Ether, or any other kind of medium."
"Indeed. Also, this."
Shirou drew a Rune in the air, forcing the air-molecules to take the shape he desired, and by doing so, expanded the room's size until it was larger than any football field on Earth, without affecting anything outside the room.
Such a thing was impossible to achieve with normal Runes, but Shirou wasn't using normal Runes. This was a Primordial Rune.
Primordial Runes were literal expressions of Divine Might, discovered by Odin after he sacrificed his eye for wisdom. They could influence Reality itself, down to the deepest layers, easily achieving anything that True Magic could. They could bend time and space, force the very concept of death upon a creature or object, reverse the laws of causality, and much, much more.
The Primordial Runes had long since been lost however, and even if they hadn't, no human, modern or ancient, could ever hope to wield them. That Shirou now casually used one to expand the size of Lorelei's bedroom showed beyond a shadow of a doubt that he was something beyond humanity.
"A Primordial Rune." Waver huffed, smiling at the ridiculousness of it all. "Alright, you've convinced me. You have some Divine Blood at the very least, enough of it to make you more god than human."
Some might say that he capitulated rather easily, but those people didn't understand just what Shirou had shown him. Authority and Primordial Runes did not belong to the realm of man. They were the domains of the Divine, of the beings who ruled from above, and to use them was to show one's divinity beyond doubt or question.
To continue having reservations would no longer be healthy scepticism, but stubborn obstinance instead.
"I do still consider myself to be a part of humanity though." Shirou felt the need to clarify before they got the wrong idea. "I usually don't feel particularly godly or anything like that. I was a human for most of my life."
"You 'were human'?" Lorelei spoke up, once again to demand clarification, her gaze still ice-cold yet with a little bit of interest mixed in now. "You weren't born a god?"
"No, I wasn't. I used to be a normal human, or as human as a Magecraft-user can be, until I found this."
'This' being Mjolnir, his faithful hammer and companion.
"A Divine Construct." Waver had never studied the gods of old in particular detail, preferring to focus on the present and the future, but he knew enough to be able to use the correct terms and names.
He was wrong of course, or at least not completely correct, but aside from Shirou's family, there was no one who knew that.
"No. This is not just a Divine Construct, but an Alien Construct."
Correction, Arcueid knew it too.
""Alien?!""
When Waver and Lorelei spoke simultaneously, things were getting serious, and Shirou rushed to explain before they got the wrong idea, again.
"It belonged to the Thor from another universe. Not just a parallel dimension within the Kaleidoscope, but a universe where the very laws of nature and Magic are different from ours. A universe where the Norse gods, the Asgardians, are alien creatures from another planet, where certain humans wield the True Magics as a matter of course, where technology is so far ahead of ours that it boggles the mind, and where outer space is full of other sapient species that developed along similar lines as humanity."
Shirou named several big differences, whilst leaving out entities such as Galactus and the Watchers, the Celestials, the mutants, and the gods from other pantheons, simply because of a lack of time.
"This is getting more ludicrous by the second." Waver shook his head in denial, but stopped when he remembered that parallel dimensions were a proven concept, which meant the existence of other universes wasn't such a ridiculous idea either. "P-Proof! Do you have proof?"
In response, Shirou took from the Vault a simple wooden board and a certain, alien device. With a quick movement, he broke the board in half, before holding the device near it and activating it.
It was a machine that was meant for repairing things. It emitted wavelengths of energy at certain frequencies that caused the atoms and molecules in the broken ends of the pieces of board to enter an excited state, which allowed him to push the pieces back together and melt them into a single whole again.
Just like that, without using any Magecraft, Magic or Authority, he had one wooden board once more. As if it had never been broken at all.
The device was as beyond the current humanity as the True Magics were, and Waver staggered at the sight, while Lorelei moved forward, looking not at the board, but at the device instead.
She took it from him, using Structural Analysis to thoroughly investigate every aspect of the unknown machine, before almost dropping it in shock when she realised it was entirely and completely alien. Made from materials that weren't from Earth, by individuals that had never even heard of Earth, it was as alien as ORT, perhaps even more so.
But even though that was the case, it did not drive them mad. It did not rob them of their sanity or lives, it did not turn anything into unearthly crystals, and most certainly did not suddenly sprout all kinds of tentacles.
It was a machine like any other on Earth, aside from not actually being from Earth.
"That's so awesome!" Arcueid gushed, not a hint of doubt anywhere on her countenance anymore. "So you got this other Thor's hammer? Did that give you his powers or something?"
"Yes, that's exactly it." Shirou nodded eagerly, before showing them Mjolnir again, this time pointing at the inscription on its side. "I was judged worthy, so I now possess the power of Thor. I am his successor, so to speak."
"That… That is the first time I've heard of a Divine Construct being used as a Crest." Waver laughed, but it was a hollow sound, his eyes staring at Shirou with such intensity that it almost felt like pins were pricking his skin. "When did you find this hammer?"
"Over a year ago now. So well before we ever met." Shirou lowered his gaze, well aware that this phase of the conversation could get messy. "I am sorry for not telling you for so long, all of you. It was not something I could share lightly, even with my friends."
"Completely understandable." Waver assured him promptly.
"I don't mind at all." Arcueid easily waved the matter away.
"It was probably for the best." Even Lorelei forgave him, mostly. "Though we shall have words all the same."
"…Thank you, truly." Their responses were nothing short of astounding, demonstrating a goodwill and understanding that showed that their characters were wholly beyond reproach. "I want to do better though. I will answer any questions you might have now."
"Are you an actual god?" Waver didn't have to be told twice, immediately asking a very good question.
"No. I didn't become a god immediately when I picked up Mjolnir. Instead, I am slowly turning into one. Even now, I am more of a demigod than anything else. It'll probably take a few years more before I can really be called anything close to a proper god."
"And when that happens, what kind of god will you be?" Lorelei asked sharply, cutting straight to the heart of the matter. "Will you be like the Greek gods, capricious and fickle, or more like your predecessor, boisterous and foolish? Will you be aloof and distant, like the Abrahamic God, or will you meddle in anything that catches your interest, like this idiot here."
"Oi!" Arcueid protested, realising very well whom Lorelei was talking about.
"What do you want?" Lorelei ignored the blonde however, pressing Shirou for answers. "What do you want to be?"
"I want to be a Hero of Justice." Shirou didn't even have to think about his reply. Ever since his father had died, he'd carried the same dream, and not even becoming a god would ever change that.
"That is an unexpectedly pleasant answer." Lorelei was entirely frank in her reply, suddenly gracing him with an approving smile. "I like it."
"It's good to know that you don't change, no matter what happens to you." Waver laughed breathlessly, and this time, it sounded genuine, though a bit too amused at Shirou's expense for the redhead's liking. "And I must say, having a god working to make the world a slightly better place is a pretty nice idea."
"I will endeavour to live up to your expectations." Shirou snarked, though he could not deny his happiness with their comments. He'd feared that the truth of who he was might ruin or irrevocably change his relations with them, that his godhood would create an insurmountable wall between them, but Lorelei and Waver proved pretty conclusively that they still saw him the same way as before. He was still their friend, who they could tease and make fun of, and that took the weight of the world off his shoulders, leaving him unable to suppress a huge smile. He sobered up quickly however when he realised there was more to talk about. "Ah, but I fear it's not all good news. Me becoming a god also has significant downsides."
"The Phantasmal Beasts." Arcueid nodded, having figured the connection between those beasts and Shirou out herself. "And the ever-increasing concentration of Magical Energy in the air that will become toxic to modern humans in about six months from now."
"Ah, yes." Waver also sobered up, rapidly connecting the dots. "The emergence of a god would indeed be more than enough to cause a Return of Mystery, with all the problems that entails."
"It is entirely my fault." Shirou admitted it without compunction, not about to make excuses or pass the buck. "And I will take full responsibility. Please, allow me to do everything I can to solve this mess."
"If you are offering your services, I will gladly accept of course." Lorelei smiled approvingly again, and although it was a thing of beauty, it also set off every alarm bell in Shirou's head. "Rest assured that I will work you to the bone."
"Ah, thank you?"
"You are most welcome."
Well, he'd asked for it, so Shirou accepted his fate. It was nothing less than he deserved anyway.
"Might I suggest then that we start with the Carillon-Observatory?"
"That is an excellent suggestion, lord El-Melloi. Lord Carillon and the Enforcers find themselves pushed to the brink even as we speak. They could certainly use our help."
"What? Why? What's going on?" Shirou was clearly missing a lot of information here, but it certainly sounded important.
He was given a quick rundown of the situation, of the Clocktower's First Classroom, deep below the surface of the Earth, and the persisting assaults by the Phantasmal Beasts there, now that Mystery was increasing down below.
"By our best estimates, lord Carillon will be able to hold the line for another two to three months before he is overwhelmed." Lorelei informed him, with Waver nodding along gravely. "Unless something is done, the Phantasmal Beasts will continue to ascend through the Tomb of Albion until they reach the Clocktower itself. That cannot be allowed to happen."
"Understood. I will do what I can." Shirou took a moment to carefully consider his options, not being much of an expert on siege warfare, which is what this very much sounded like. "It sounds like sealing the tunnels would be our best bet, but since they haven't done so yet, I assume it isn't that easy?"
"We have tried to seal the tunnels in a variety of ways, magical and mundane, but the strength of the Phantasmal Beasts makes gates and fortifications of little use, while the immense amounts of Magical Energy in the air makes it impossible for Bounded Fields to be anchored near the entrances." Waver's pained grimace showed personal experience, implying that he had been at the forefront of many of the attempts to seal the tunnels. "We cannot collapse them either. As I said, Magecraft barely works, and even high-grade explosives failed to so much as chip the rocks. We are, as they say, at our wits' end."
"Don't worry. Shirou can collapse them." Arcueid wasn't the slightest bit concerned however, giving Waver a reassuring pat on the back, missing or ignoring how her touch caused him to stiffen in alarm.
"Oh? How do you figure?" It wasn't that Shirou was displeased by her trust in him, but he did want to know where that trust was coming from.
"The reason they can't collapse the tunnels is because Albion's Authority protects and maintains them. As a True Dragon, his power is far greater than that of any modern Mage, even in death. However, if you truly are Thor's successor, you are a god of the Earth, like me, which means your Authority supersedes his. If you want those tunnels to collapse, they will." Arcueid's eyes seemed to sparkle in joy when she mentioned him being a god of the Earth, and she drew nearer. "You might even say that you are my little brother."
"Because Thor was the son of Jörd, the Norse goddess of the Earth?" Shirou asked, not sure how to feel about being considered the younger sibling when it was Arcueid who always acted so much like a little sister.
"Jörd is just another name for Gaia, so yes." The White Princess looked like a young girl given a present she'd been after for years, stepping even closer. "I've always wanted a brother."
"A brother?" Lorelei watched the scene in front of her with an expression that practically radiated doubt, but she soon straightened her expression again. "I would tell you that family lines and blood-relations do not function in such a manner, but since you consider the Kaleidoscope your grandfather as well, I expect my words to fall on deaf ears."
"Hm, did you say something, Lei-Lei?" Arcueid smiled viciously at the brunette, practically baring her teeth in challenge. "Do you want to say it to my face?"
"Perhaps I should, if that will make you listen for once."
The sharp rise in animosity was concerning, and Shirou prepared to step between them, but when neither woman followed up on their threats, he dared to relax again. It was just more sniping and jabbing, nothing too serious.
"I should probably hold off on collapsing the tunnels though until I've descended into the Tomb and found what I am looking for, right?" He asked, mainly to distract Arcueid and get her to stop glaring at Lorelei already. "You did tell me I had to find something that is buried down there. A weapon of sorts."
Back in Misaki Town, she'd practically ordered him to descend deep into the tunnels, 'into crack and crevice', she'd said, to find someone who'd give him further instruction for his quest to save the world.
"Yes." Turning away from Lorelei, Arcueid nodded again, pursing her lips as the joy disappeared from her face. "In order to save the world, you have to find your next guide, preferably within the coming nine days. Certainly no later than that."
"Excuse me? Save the world?" Waver, who'd discreetly remained in the background for the past minute, piped up, hearing something rather distressing. "Save the world from what?"
"I don't know exactly." Shirou admitted, figuring he might as well come clean about that too. "All I know is that I have heard, from a very reliable source, that the world is going to be destroyed at some point in the near future, and that I have to follow a set of very specific instructions to prevent it."
"Does this have anything to do with the Grail War?" Lorelei asked, remembering that he'd told her about that maddened slaughter fest that was due to start again in Fuyuki soon.
"It could, but it might just as well be something else." Shirou would very much like to blame it all on the Grail War, but that would be dishonest, both to himself and to her. "It could also be that a True Dragon might appear, to name an example, or that ORT will wake up."
"The Vault in Atlas might break, releasing their seven doomsday weapons." Waver supplied another option, deciding to just go along with the discussion. "Each is said to be capable of destroying the Earth."
"Maybe the remnant of an ancient Magus-king will grow disillusioned with mankind, so he'll gather all your accumulated history and burn it in order to generate enough energy to travel back in time and create a better human race." Arcueid suggested, pulling a face. "It would really be a bother if that happened here too."
"Quite." It was a testament to Lorelei's mental resilience that she barely batted an eye at the outrageously specific scenario, even as Shirou and Waver deadpanned at Arcueid. "You are certain that you trust this source implicitly, Shirou?"
"I am." Letting the matter of ancient Magus-kings and burning history lie for now, the redhead nodded firmly. He did not believe that Nasu would lie to him.
"Then it would be best if you did as you're told."
"Indeed. I'll descend into the Tomb of Albion. With some luck, I won't be down there for longer than a single day."
"You'll need at least three." Arcueid corrected him casually, as if it were no big deal.
"…I won't be down there longer than three days." Shirou adjusted his expectations. "Afterwards, I'll collapse the tunnels."
"If you survive." Though Lorelei's voice was mostly flat, Shirou did manage to pick up faint traces of concern for him. Traces that gladdened him very much to hear. "I don't doubt that the lethal concentrations of Magical Energy in the Tomb are not so lethal to you, but Magical Energy is far from the only threat down there."
"The Tomb of Albion has always held countless monsters and abominations, and their ranks have only swelled since your ascension. It's not going to be easy to make your way past them, not even for you, Shirou. It's very well possible that you won't survive the journey." Surprisingly, Arcueid unabashedly took Lorelei's side on this, looking extremely serious, every trace of levity having disappeared from her expression and demeanour. "You cannot afford to hold anything back. When you start your journey, you must resolve yourself to kill everything that moves, and then kill everything that does not move too. Show no mercy, for you will receive none."
"I… I understand."
Pre-emptively killing everything in sight was not Shirou's usual method of exploration, and in fact completely contrary to his goal of becoming a Hero of Justice, but he could not deny that lofty morals and norms were probably non-existent down there in the Tomb. Any attempt to conduct himself as he would with other humans was most likely doomed to fail utterly when tried with Phantasmal Beasts. One could not parley with a Demon Boar, or negotiate safe passage with Dragonkin.
He'd hoped at first though that his nascent godhood would be enough to scare most enemies away, and that he could chase off or avoid the rest. Evidently however, he had massively underestimated the actual level of danger.
Lorelei Barthomeloi and Arcueid Brunestud were no cowards. They were both hardened warriors who'd faced down the likes of Dead Apostle Ancestors without hesitation and won every time. They were immensely powerful, fighters by nature and instinct. The word 'fear' did not seem to be in their dictionaries.
For them to be as unnerved as they were now, warning him that nothing less than his full power and effort would see him to victory, meant that the creatures lurking in the Tomb of Albion were terrifying indeed.
Not the greatest of prospects when he had no choice but to descend.
"If the tunnels cannot be sealed until you have visited the Tomb yourself, you should not delay." Lorelei still didn't look entirely comfortable with the idea of Shirou putting himself at risk like that, but she didn't argue against it, realising that sometimes, it was necessary to take such risks. "Considering the current situation in the Carillon Observatory, sooner would be better than later."
"Also, the longer you wait, the stronger the Magical Energy will become down there." Waver added another reason to make haste. "Naturally, the monsters will become stronger too. Waiting would be detrimental to your purpose."
"I will go in the morning, at nine." Shirou took a glance at the clock hanging on Lorelei's wall, deciding that there was no reason to delay. "So in about six hours."
"I will make the necessary arrangements with lord Carillon. I do not imagine they'll have any objections." Lorelei hummed, looking a bit ponderous. "There is however a considerable chance that they will insist on accompanying you from the front door of their Classroom to the entrance of the tunnels, if only to ensure you won't steal anything."
"That's fine." Shirou wasn't a thief, but he wasn't going to deny a Magus the right to guard their home and life's work. "Will you come with me into the Tomb, Arcueid?"
"Absolutely not." The Moon Princess summarily rejected the very idea. "If I came along with you, we'd be swarmed by every single monster in a thousand kilometre radius before we'd taken three steps. I'm not exactly popular down there."
Yet again, Shirou was surprised. Just like he'd assumed that his nascent godhood would have scared off most predators, he'd also imagined that Arcueid's true nature would have endeared her with Phantasmal Beasts. She was almost literally the Earth itself after all, the very thing that gave the Phantasmal Beasts their existence and power. By all accounts, they should worship her.
Except they didn't, apparently.
The world was clearly a great deal more complicated than he'd expected, even now.
"I believe that concludes our discussion." Lorelei very nearly ordered. "There is much to be done and we have little time to waste. We shall reconvene in the morning, at the Carillon Observatory. Make sure to prepare yourself for your respective tasks."
"Me too?" Arcueid asked hopefully, looking like she wouldn't mind joining in at all.
"No." Lorelei shot her down though, which probably was for the best. "Your presence would only create chaos and violence. Come morning, I want you out of the Clocktower."
"Hmpf. Stupid Magi." Grumbling to herself, Arcueid capitulated, knowing that the brunette was right. If she showed herself in public anywhere in the Clocktower, it would only result in pandemonium.
Ignoring the sulking goddess, Lorelei turned to Waver next.
"Since you do not play a vital part in the proceedings, I shall leave it to your discretion whether you will join us at the Carillon Observatory or not."
"With all due respect, there is no way I am going to miss something like this." Waver smiled wanly, having lost the battle with his own curiosity despite his best efforts to suppress it. "Even if I can only wait at the entrance of the tunnels, I imagine there is much I can learn."
"You are always welcome of course." Shirou would appreciate another friend at his side while he embarked on a dangerous mission, though he soon remembered that wasn't up to him. "Provided that lord… Carillon? Lord Carillon agrees."
"There is no reason they would not. They are a member of the Aristocratic Faction, and quite close to lord El-Melloi." Lorelei assured him. "They have always let him in before when he wanted to visit. They will again come morning."
"I don't know if I would call us close." Waver hedged, though he did not deny the rest of Lorelei's claim.
"I suppose I'll have to start preparing as well then." Shirou had expected that his descent into the Tomb of Albion would be a perilous endeavour, but it was apparently going to be even more dangerous than he could possibly have foreseen. Dangerous to the point that Lorelei and Arcueid genuinely weren't sure whether he'd survive or not. Knowing that, he wanted to be as ready as he could be, in multiple ways.
Also, he would have to decide what he was going to do about Rin and Ophelia. Right now, they were safe at his house, in Fuyuki, none the wiser about what was going on here. Ideally, it would stay that way, minus the ignorance of course, until he returned from the Tomb. That wasn't realistic though. Both Rin and Ophelia had duties they had to attend to, tasks to fulfil, and he could not ask them to put that on hold merely because he was away.
He'd have to make sure they were as safe as possible at the Clocktower then. With some luck, Lorelei would be willing to help with that. Provided that he managed to salvage their friendship at least partially in the coming six hours.
He might as well get on that immediately.
"Before I go, could I have a moment to speak with you in private?"
"…" Lorelei didn't reply for a moment after his request, visibly mulling it over, before she acquiesced. "Lord El-Melloi, Moon Princess. Leave us."
"What? But I do not want to-"
"Lady Brunestud." Surprisingly, it was Waver who interrupted the blonde. "We should give them a moment alone. Please, mind the social cues."
Social cues were definitely not Arcueid's forte, but fortunately, she was aware of that. As such, she soon realised that this was a sensitive situation, one that she wasn't remotely equipped to handle, and decided to make herself scarce.
"Goodbye then. I'll be going to South Africa now. I have more Dead Apostle Ancestors to hunt." She bade them farewell, before scurrying off, only pausing to playfully punch Shirou's shoulder as a final greeting. She was followed quickly behind by Waver, who was still extremely uncomfortable with being inside the Vice Director's bedroom, to the point where his only greeting was a small nod before he practically fled the scene.
Greetings and farewells were the furthest thing from Shirou's mind however, seeing that he was quite possibly heading for the most difficult conversation in his life. Lorelei had sat down on her bed, elegantly crossing her legs, and the look she gave him was… not necessarily angry or malicious, but it also lacked the warmth it had previously held. If anything, it looked impressively neutral.
She was reserving judgement, he soon realised. She was giving him a chance to explain himself before she made a decision about their shared future. What he would say next would determine the fate of their friendship.
He better not waste that chance.
"Lady Barthome-" He started out almost excessively polite, but an exasperated glare saw an end to that, just like the previous times he'd tried to use her title and last name. Apparently, she wasn't so angry that they were no longer on a first-name basis. "Lorelei, I am sorry."
"For what?"
"For sneaking into your bedroom." Shirou still thought it had been wrong of him to do that, even if Lorelei had dismissed the whole matter without a second thought and even if she yet again rolled her eyes at his words. "And for not telling you about my true nature for so long."
That apology was more pertinent, and for a long while, Lorelei said nothing.
It was not a pleasant silence, feeling rather oppressive and stifling, and Shirou had to fight the urge to keep talking, if only to fill the painful void. He'd taken the first step, expressing remorse, and now the ball was in her court. All he could do now was wait patiently for her reply.
"Men have secrets. That has long been known to me." It took almost a full minute for the brunette to speak up again, and even then, she spoke slowly and ponderously, indicating that she was still mulling his apology over. "I never imagined that you had told me your every secret, nor did I ever expect you to. I certainly never revealed all of mine. Secrets are secrets for a reason, and yours are particularly dangerous. Knowing my reputation and hatred for the inhuman, you would have been mad to reveal your true nature to me any sooner than this."
"But?" Recognising she wasn't done yet, Shirou gently prompted her to continue. Her words had been almost understanding so far, but it was too early to hold out hope. Her judgement had yet to be made.
"I am mainly confused." Lorelei admitted, speaking words that no one else would ever hear from her without dying immediately after. No other man would survive seeing her make herself vulnerable like that, and Shirou realised very well how privileged a position he was in. "You are a god, as inhuman as inhuman can be, yet you do not behave accordingly in the slightest. From you, I sense no treachery, no cruelty, no lethal capriciousness, or deadly arrogance. Instead, you have always shown yourself reliable, dependable, kind to a fault, and possessing of a character beyond reproach. A man I am happy to have at my side."
"O-Oh, I don't know about that." Whatever Shirou had been expecting, it certainly hadn't been to be praised like that all of a sudden, and it left him blushing and tongue-tied.
"You are inhuman, yet also a better person than anyone else I have ever met. Hence, you confuse me, more than anything else I have encountered thus far." Lorelei frowned, looking at him as if he were a frustrating puzzle she just couldn't solve. "I know I am supposed to hate you, yet I cannot bring myself to. Simultaneously however, I cannot forgive or forget the fact that you are the antithesis of everything the Barthomeloi stand for. I expect you wish to know what our relationship will be like from here on, but try as I might, I cannot give you a proper answer to that inquiry. Try as I might, I cannot devise a suitable response."
So, in other words, she was undecided. In hindsight, Shirou should have expected something like that. Lorelei wasn't a machine, or a flawless existence. It was only logical that she did not have the answers to everything.
Really, he should just be happy that she was contemplating a proper response rather than condemning him immediately. It meant that there was still a chance, however remote, that they could mend their friendship.
She might be a tad unbending and zealous, but Lorelei was still his friend. She was a kind and trustworthy woman, whom he did not want to lose. Especially not over something that, in his opinion, should make no difference.
"Human or god, I am still the same Shirou." He told her, and he was happy to see how she inclined her head in slight acceptance. Nevertheless, she clearly remained unsure, and in need of more convincing. "Is there anything I can do to persuade you of that?"
"Not with words." Lorelei shook her head. There was only so much that apologies could do, no matter what he said.
"How about with battle then?"
He made the offer on an impulse, prompted by her choice of words. If his arguments and claims would not sway her, then perhaps his fists would. It seemed a strange thing to propose, but they were both warriors, and that meant that sometimes, they could communicate more clearly with actions than with words.
"…Are you challenging me, Shirou?" Lorelei stilled once he threw down the metaphorical glove, all uncertainty and doubt bleeding out of her expression to make room for determination and a hint of shocked excitement.
"I sure am." He confirmed, heartened by that excitement, clenching his fist. "Once I return from the Tomb of Albion, we shall do battle. I will show you my sincerity by beating you fair and square."
"You will try." The tiny yet highly amused smirk that appeared on Lorelei's face suited her far better than the uncertainty from before. It made her look dangerous, confident, and distressingly attractive. "It would certainly allow me to take your measure. I claimed your character beyond reproach before, and after our battle, I would know for certain."
"Then you accept?"
"I do. Before the eyes of the Magus Association, we shall duel in the arena. We shall compare our power and skill for all to see."
"And if I win, you will forgive me?" Shirou asked, just to be sure.
"Fulfil your promise by engaging me with all your courage and strength. If you do so, and fight until your last breath, then win or lose, I shall forgive your every transgression, real or imagined, and name you my friend forever after." Lorelei promised, her voice sincere and her eyes filled with the shine of delight. "Show me the extent of your courage, valour, and heart, and prove them sufficient to be counted amongst humans still."
"And if I do win? Do I get something extra?"
"…Ahem." His question suddenly made her look away, her demeanour becoming almost… bashful? "Should you manage to defeat me, I will… give you another reward."
"What kind of reward?"
"If you win, I will tell you."
"Really? You want to play it like that?" Shirou huffed at her vague response, but he recognised he wasn't going to get anything more out of her. "Fine. I'll find out when I beat you."
His unabashed confidence managed to do what his apologies couldn't. It put Lorelei in an excellent mood, to the point where she rose from her bed and gave him a delighted smile.
Just like that, he'd almost regained her friendship and normalised their relations.
Now all that was left was to face her in the duel, to prove himself better than the cowardly Dead Apostle Ancestors, the savage Phantasmal Beasts, and the honourless Wraiths, and then all would be well again, even if he lost.
And if he won, all the better. Honestly, he really wanted to know what that special reward would be.
"Hello there!" A very cheery man called out in a very cheery voice, his mood and demeanour entirely unfit for the gloomy and damp surroundings he'd just found himself in. Indifferent to the mud that now stained his shoes, he beamed brightly at the woman before him, seemingly uncaring that his smile was not reciprocated. "Ah, must you make this place into a bog every time I visit? I like the meadow so much more."
"You are very brave to come here. Did I not tell you that I would unman you if you showed your face to me again?" The response he received was a tired sigh, coupled with a threat that was uttered in a tone so passive that it lacked any sort of actual danger.
"That warning would scare me a lot more if you didn't keep saying the exact same thing every time we meet." The cheery man pointed out. "If you reserved it for special occasions, and at least pretended sometimes that you mean it, I think it would be a lot more intimidating."
"I do not care what you think." The reply sounded automatic, as if it had been said a thousand times before. "Why are you here? I have nothing new to say. I cannot alleviate your boredom any more than I can alleviate mine."
Both the man and the woman had been trapped in their respective prisons for centuries now, with no one for company except whatever Phantasmal Beasts sometimes scurried by. Technically, they hadn't even been trapped in the same place, but the man had certain tricks at his disposal that allowed him to project himself elsewhere, even as his body remained in his prison.
"I have some news for you."
Because of that ability, the man was usually better informed about current events in the World of Man than the woman, even though she possessed Clairvoyance herself, and he sometimes stopped by to fill her in.
The woman's opinion about those visits was decidedly ambivalent. On one hand, she grievously disliked the man and didn't want him around, but on the other, she was bored out of her mind, and he did always manage to make that boredom go away for a while.
Usually by angering her, but beggars couldn't be choosers.
"Is it anything I should care about?" The woman ventured carefully, unable to entirely suppress a note of interest, which increased tenfold when his smile widened even more. Not that she showed it on her face. She wasn't going to give him the satisfaction.
"You will get a visitor soon. Of the human variety."
"What?" Some inflection inadvertently returned to her voice, betraying her surprise. "How? Why?"
"One question at a time, dear, I have told you that many times before." The man laughed, before skilfully dodging the minor curse she threw at him in response. "I can't say exactly what is going on up there, but apparently, someone needs your help, desperately enough to brave the Tomb of Albion to get here. Someone we both know very well."
"Who?"
"Emiya Shirou."
"Arturia's man?"
"The very same, in the flesh."
"How can that be? Humans cannot hope to survive here, and last I heard, he was human still. An impressive one, but human all the same." Her eyebrows scrunched up slightly in suspicion as a thought occurred to her. "Have you been meddling again?"
"I have not! I swear it on my dead mother's soul!"
That was a meaningful oath, sufficiently so for the woman to ease her suspicious glare.
The man was not a reliable sort. He lied easily and often, using deceit as a tool to further his goals. Sometimes, to seem more trustworthy to humans, he swore by his father's name or his children's lives, conveniently leaving out that he hated his father and that he had no children.
He did love and respect his mother however, as much as it was possible for him to love and respect anyone at least, so when he invoked her, it was serious.
"But if you have not been meddling, how is it possible that any human could get anywhere near here without dying?" She asked.
"Perhaps this is related to the disturbance we felt in the Inner World recently." The man suggested, using his staff to rub the back of his head.
"What do you mean 'perhaps'? Are you not sure?"
"It's not my fault!" He protested against the implied accusation, pouting as if she'd just scolded him. "There's so many strange things going on lately that I can no longer see clearly what is happening. My sight is being obfuscated!"
"Obfuscated? By whom?"
"Well, if I knew that, I wouldn't be standing here with so many questions, now would I?"
"You must have some idea. You are a fool, but you are not that easy to trick."