Chapter 2. A Planet's First Status Screen
"Status."
He said it again, a bit nervously this time.
A light ripple passed through his consciousness—like a screen opening inside his mind.
A faint translucent panel materialized.
Simple. Barebones. Almost empty.
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
[STATUS]
Name: — Arin
Species: Golem
Age: 0 years
Skills: None
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
"…That's it?"
He had imagined something grand, something complex.
Maybe stats like Strength, Intelligence, Mana, Defense…
But no. Just this.
"I transmigrated into a freaking planet and I don't even get a proper character sheet…"
The molten crust beneath him rumbled irritably, as if sharing his disappointment.
With a sigh, he closed the panel and focused on his surroundings.
His entire surface was a battlefield of creation—volcanoes erupting one after another, magma flowing in scorching rivers, thunderous bursts of heat splitting rock. The planet wasn't just alive; it was furious.
Firestorms roared across newly forming continents.
Ash clouds climbed into the sky like pillars.
The air itself shimmered with burning energy.
And yet… something felt off.
One part of his world glowed brilliantly—bathed in the radiant light of the young sun.
The other side, though still lit by endless eruptions, was darker, dimmer, like a perpetual red twilight.
He watched the line between the two halves shift… slowly but constantly.
The bright zone slid across his surface.
The darkened zone followed behind it.
A realization sparked.
"Oh. This is… day and night."
He wasn't just a stationary rock.
He was rotating, and as he turned, the sun lit different parts of his body.
Day.
Night.
Day.
Night.
"…I guess planets do that."
He felt strangely proud of this discovery—even though every kindergarten child on Earth already knew it.
Wanting to understand more, he focused on the vastness above him.
A strange sensation washed through him—like stretching a limb he didn't know he had.
Then—
WHOOSH
His perspective suddenly shot upward, away from volcanic plains, away from molten mountains, rising through the sky—
—and then he broke free of the atmosphere.
He could see everything.
The blazing sun, glaring like a god of fire.
His own planetary body below—an enormous sphere of red-hot magma, glowing cracks, and erupting volcanoes across the entire surface.
From space, he looked terrifying.
Magnificent.
Alive.
"I… I actually did it. I can shift my perspective."
It felt natural, like switching cameras in a video game—but the view was real, infinite, overwhelming.
He gazed at himself from the void, awe settling in his chest.
He was a newborn planet.
A molten world.
A beginning.
And with a system.
A system that would record every eruption, every rotation, every cosmic moment…
He couldn't wait to see what kind of skills a planet could get.
Chapter 3. My First Skill… Is Burning?!
Arin hovered in space, watching his own molten body turn slowly beneath him.
The endless eruptions, oceans of lava, and roaring flames gave his surface a terrifying beauty.
He wasn't just hot—he was burning every second of his existence.
Suddenly, the familiar chime of the system echoed in his mind.
[Notice: Host is continuously burning.]
Arin blinked—mentally.
"Uh… yes? That's kind of obvious."
But the system continued.
[Enough burning-related records accumulated.]
[Generating skill…]
[Skill generation successful.]
[Skill Generated: Burning]
{Effect: Host burns 1% more efficiently while reducing fuel consumption by 1%}
Arin froze.
"…That's my first skill?"
A silence fell—well, as silent as space could be.
Then he exploded.
"ARE YOU SERIOUS!?"
"Burning!? I'm a planet made of FIRE! I burn EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! And my first skill… is burning better?!"
His outrage resonated through his entire planet-sized body.
A hundred volcanoes erupted at once, spraying magma skyward like fountains of anger.
Lava waves crashed along molten coastlines.
Firestorms intensified, swirling wildly.
Even the tectonic plates groaned.
"It's like giving a fish a skill called 'Swimming Slightly Faster!' Or giving a bird 'Flap Wings But More Efficiently!'"
He waited for the system to correct him.
To explain.
To say he misunderstood and that actually this was the first step to some god-tier primordial fire law.
But nothing came.
Total silence.
"HELLO?! System? You there? Say something!"
Still nothing.
Arin's frustration slowly simmered down, like magma cooling from red-hot to a dull orange.
Finally, he sighed.
"…Alright, alright. I guess it's better than nothing."
He stared at the status window again.
Skills:
— Burning (Level 1)
His first skill.
Not glorious.
Not powerful.
But it existed.
"Well…" he muttered, "at least I got my first skill. Skills can upgrade, and new ones will form. I'm just a newborn planet, after all."
Though his pride was wounded, a spark of excitement still glowed in him.
If burning could become a skill…
Then what about eruption?
Planetary rotation?
Tectonic collisions?
Asteroid impacts?
Atmosphere creation?
Ocean formation?
A planet's evolution was full of events. Full of records.
Full of potential skills.
Arin looked down at his blazing surface again.
"Fine. I'll take this stupid Burning skill. But I'm getting better ones soon."
He didn't know it yet…
but this tiny skill was the very first step toward becoming a planetary god.
Chapter 4. The Planet That "Bleeds"
For Arin, several "days" had passed—meaning he had rotated around himself several times while staring into space out of boredom.
Just as he was wondering if a new skill might appear, the familiar chime of the system echoed in his mind.
[Notice: Host is continuously bleeding.]
"…What?"
Arin froze.
"Bleeding? How? I don't even have blood!"
But the system wasn't done.
ERROR
ERROR [Host is a golem and does not have blood]
ERROR [Sufficient records of bleeding have been accumulated]
ERROR ERROR
Arin felt dizziness he wasn't sure a planet could even feel.
"I don't have blood! How am I bleeding!? And why are you accumulating 'bleeding' records for a being that doesn't bleed!?"
The system paused.
Then:
[Fixing error.]
[Host species updated: {Golem} → {Golem with Blood (Unique)}]
[Congratulations to Host for evolving.]
Arin waited.
And waited.
And… nothing happened.
His planetary body stayed exactly the same—molten, erupting, on fire.
"Evolved? Nothing changed! I'm still a hot ball of death!"
But the system continued anyway.
[Enough bleeding-related records accumulated.]
[Generating skill…]
[Skill generation successful.]
[Skill Generated: Bleeding]
{Effect: Host bleeds 1% more efficiently while reducing blood consumption by 1%}
A faint sensation washed across Arin—like the volcanoes erupting on his body had slightly increased in force. Not much, but noticeable.
"Woah—hey! That felt like someone increased the volcano pressure!"
Then realization struck.
"Wait… WAIT! System, are you thinking volcano eruptions are bleeding!?"
[Host golems do not erupt, but your unique species can bleed. Host is bleeding even now.]
Arin was speechless.
"…System, I'm a PLANET. I erupt because of MAGMA, not BLEEDING!"
[…]
"Oh great, now you've gone silent again."
He tried again.
"System, I am a planet. Say it. PLAN-ET."
[…]
"HELLO?"
The system replied with something even more ridiculous.
[Host should have himself checked by a golem doctor. How can someone become a planet? Host is a golem.]
"WHAT GOLEM DOCTOR? I'm not going to some giant rock clinic! And YOU should get checked by a system doctor or whatever!"
The system stopped responding again.
Arin groaned mentally.
"Useless…"
He tried to calm down and look at the new skill rationally.
The Bleeding skill reduced "blood consumption"—which for him meant molten core consumption.
But something didn't add up.
"My lava output increased by 2%… but my core consumption only decreased by 1%. So where does the extra 2% lava come from?"
He tried asking.
"System, where does the extra lava come from?"
Silence.
"System… where does the extra 2% blood come from?"
This time, the system answered immediately.
[Skills generated by the system from records are beyond the laws of the universe. They only follow the Rule of Records.]
Arin froze.
"…Beyond the laws of the universe? So they don't follow the law of conservation of mass and energy? Not physics? Not thermodynamics?"
His planetary core trembled.
"System… what's the difference between laws and rules?"
There was a short pause.
Then the answer came.
[Laws are limited to a specific domain—an area, a universe, an omniverse, or a reality.]
[Rules are truth. Wherever they appear, they override laws completely.]
Arin stared blankly at space for several minutes.
So his skills were violating universal physics.
Just casually.
"…I need a moment."
For the first time since becoming a planet, Arin felt something close to fear. And excitement. And existential crisis—all at once.
If records could create skills that broke universal laws…
Just what kind of being could he become?
Chapter 5. The Falling Rock
Arin was finally relaxing, drifting through space as a molten planet-sized golem with a buggy system and two ridiculous skills: Burning and Bleeding.
Life was weird, but at least stable.
Until something tugged at him.
A faint gravitational pull from far away.
He extended his awareness outward… and saw it.
A huge, jagged rock drifting through space—growing bigger every second.
"…Is that coming toward me?"
The object entered his gravitational influence… then shot toward him like a missile.
It was an asteroid.
A massive one.
"Oh no. Oh no no no— SYSTEM?"
The system chimed.
[Notice: A rock is falling toward Host.]
"A ROCK?" Arin shouted. "That's a WHOLE MOUNTAIN IN SPACE!"
But the system continued calmly:
[Rock collision predicted.]
[Impact in: 14 seconds.]
"FOURTEEN SECONDS—SYSTEM, HELP!"
[…]
No response.
The asteroid hit his atmosphere, igniting into a blazing inferno.
FWOOOOOOSH
It tore through his sky and—
BOOOOOOOOM!!!
The explosion was world-shattering.
Lava erupted upward in a massive geyser, ash clouds engulfed continents, and a crater the size of a country blasted open on his surface. Many pieces of rocks were thrown upward which fall back on the planet.
Arin felt every bit of it.
"AAAAAAHHHHHH— THAT'S NOT A ROCK, THAT'S A PLANET-KILLER!"
For several minutes he just lay there—mentally—trying not to cry lava.
Then the system finally beeped:
[Recording acquired: Hit by Rock ×1]
[Recording acquired: Blunt Damage ×126]
[Recording acquired: Host fell down (metaphorically) ×999+]
Arin stared.
"System… fell down!? I am a PLANET. I don't FALL DOWN!"
The system ignored him and continued:
[Notice: Enough rock-hitting records gathered.]
[Generating skill…]
Arin waited, trembling.
"Please… please be a good one… for once…"
[Skill generation successful.]
[Skill Generated: Rock Resistance]
{Effect: Reduces damage taken from falling rocks by 1%.}
Arin went silent.
Very silent.
"…One percent."
His entire crust trembled.
"And NOT asteroid resistance. ROCK resistance."
[…]
The system stayed quiet, as if proud of itself.
Arin exploded—literally.
Dozens of volcanoes erupted at once in sheer frustration.
"A 500-KILOMETER METAL ASTEROID HITS ME, AND YOU CALL IT A ROCK!?"
But the system finally chimed:
[Host is a golem. Rocks hit golems. Asteroids hit planets. Host is a golem.]
Arin froze.
"…I'm literally a PLANET."
[…]
"System?"
[…]
"Oh great, back to silent mode again."
Arin grumbled, staring at the new crater on his surface.
"Well… at least future asteroids—sorry, 'rocks'—will hurt 1% less."
He sighed.
And then… something caught his attention.
Far in space…
More "rocks" were falling toward him.
And this time?
There were a lot of them.
"System… why are there so many rocks?"
[Host should walk where he is walking.]
Arin felt his entire mantle twist in despair.
"What walking i am a planet."
"…I'm going to die from stupidity. Not from impacts—from your stupidity."
But the rocks kept coming.
And with them—more records.
More skills.
More evolution.
Chapter 6. "Running" Around the Sun
Arin had finally recovered from the asteroid—
sorry, the "falling rock"—that nearly cracked his entire planetary body.
He floated calmly now, watching magma rivers flow like glowing veins and firestorms whirl across his surface.
But then…
A familiar ding echoed in his mind.
[Notice: Host is continuously moving.]
Arin paused.
"…Moving? I'm a planet. I don't move by myself."
But the system wasn't done.
[Notice: Host is running in circles.]
Arin froze.
"…WHAT!?"
Before he could react:
[Notice: Host is rotating rapidly.]
[Host is also revolving around a large fire-element object.]
"YOU MEAN THE SUN!?"
But the system interpreted it differently:
[Host has been running around a fire-element monster for many days.]
Arin nearly exploded—literally.
"I AM NOT RUNNING AROUND THE SUN LIKE SOME ATHLETE! I'M ORBITING! EVERY PLANET DOES THAT!"
[…]
The system ignored him.
Instead, it began listing records:
[Recording collected: Running ×9999+]
[Recording collected: Spinning ×9999+]
[Recording collected: Circling a fire-element enemy ×365+]
[Recording collected: Host's legs must be very strong.]
Arin felt his mantle convulse.
"I DON'T EVEN HAVE LEGS!"
But the system continued calmly:
[Notice: Sufficient movement-related records accumulated.]
[Generating skills…]
Skills.
Plural.
Arin braced himself.
"Please… PLEASE don't let them be stupid…"
The system chimed proudly:
---
Skill 1 Generated: Running
{Effect: Host moves 1% faster while reducing stamina consumption by 1%.}
Arin stared into space.
"…I DON'T MOVE! The SUN pulls me! I don't have stamina!"
---
Skill 2 Generated: Spinning
{Effect: Host spins 1% faster while maintaining perfect balance.}
Arin blinked.
"I'm a PLANET. I've been spinning since birth!"
---
Skill 3 Generated: Orbit Mastery (Beginner)
Arin perked up.
Hey… this one actually sounded cool.
{Effect: Host maintains circular running path more efficiently.}
His excitement died instantly.
"…Running path. Running."
[Host runs around the fire monster very smoothly now.]
Arin's internal temperature spiked.
"THAT'S NOT A FIRE MONSTER—IT'S THE SUN!"
[According to golem physiology, all large fire-element objects are classified as monsters.]
"I— I— YOU— YOU KNOW WHAT, I GIVE UP!"
He felt volcanoes erupt in pure frustration.
Magma bubbled angrily.
Fault lines cracked.
Firestorms intensified.
The system beeped again.
[Notice: Host appears to be sweating lava.]
[Recording saved.]
Arin screamed mentally:
"THAT'S JUST MY SURFACE MELTING!"
[…]
No response.
Of course.
Arin eventually calmed himself and examined the skills again.
Running.
Spinning.
Orbit Mastery.
They were stupid.
Embarrassing.
Insulting even.
But…
He did feel slightly more stable.
His rotation felt smoother.
His orbital path seemed more controlled.
His volcanic eruptions even felt a bit… rhythmic?
"…These stupid skills actually work?"
His planetary eyes widened.
The skills might be absurd…
But they were helping him evolve.
A tiny grin formed in his planetary consciousness.
"Fine. If the system wants to think I'm a running golem, let it."
He looked at the stars with fiery determination.
"If absurdity makes me stronger… then let the universe bring it on."
He didn't realize it yet.
But the next "record-based skill" he would receive…
Would be even more ridiculous.
And even more powerful.
Chapter 7. The Planet That "Exhales"
Arin floated through space, spinning and "running" around the sun, still annoyed at the system for giving him skills meant for marathon athletes instead of newborn planets.
But something new was happening.
Something subtle.
Something he didn't notice until it became impossible to ignore.
A faint hisssss spread across his entire surface.
Volcanoes erupted nonstop, spewing clouds of gas.
Massive plumes of sulfur, carbon dioxide, steam, and ash poured upward, filling the space just above him.
Arin felt… heavier.
Warmer.
Like something was wrapping around him.
"…Huh? Why is everything so foggy?"
Then he sensed it.
A growing layer of gases hugging his body.
He realized instantly:
"Wait… WAIT! Is this—"
Before he could finish, the system chimed.
[Notice: Host is exhaling.]
Arin's brain—if he had one—short-circuited.
"EXHALING? SYSTEM, I AM NOT BREATHING OUT! I'M FORMING AN ATMOSPHERE!"
But the system ignored him:
[Notice: Host is continuously exhaling in large quantities.]
[Exhalation includes: Ash, smoke, fire-element gas, earth-element dust, and unknown fumes.]
"Unknown fumes!?" Arin shouted. "It's just volcanic gases!"
But the system proudly continued:
[Recording collected: Heavy Exhalation ×9999+]
[Recording collected: Tired Golem Sigh ×142]
[Recording collected: Host blowing air aggressively ×360]
"AGGRESSIVELY!? No! That's not me breathing out! That's a supervolcano exploding!"
But the system refused to listen.
[Notice: Sufficient exhalation records gathered.]
[Generating skill…]
Arin braced himself.
If the previous skills were stupid, this one was going to be legendary in stupidity.
[Skill generation successful.]
[Skill Generated: Breath]
{Effect: Host can exhale 1% more efficiently while reducing internal heat accumulation by 1%.}
Arin stared blankly at space.
"…I— I'm done. I can't. A 'Breath' skill. A BREATH SKILL. For a PLANET."
Volcanoes erupted in a synchronized blast of anger.
Boom.
Boom.
BOOM.
The system chimed:
[Notice: Host is panting.]
Arin almost fainted.
"I'M NOT PANTING! IT'S A VOLCANIC CHAIN REACTION!"
The system listed more records:
[Recording collected: Host panting heavily ×999+]
[Recording collected: Host overheating and cooling down simultaneously ×532]
[Recording collected: Host releasing toxic air due to exhaustion ×211]
"Toxic air!? IT'S SULFUR GAS! NOT BAD BREATH!"
Arin fumed as more volcanic clouds thickened around him.
His atmosphere—still thin, but forming—wrapped him like a glowing orange blanket.
He sensed pressure building.
Heat rerouting.
Energy movements across his mantle.
The system beeped again:
[Notice: Host's breath is getting stronger.]
"I swear system, stop saying that—"
[Notice: Host unlocked new ability: Continuous Breathing.]
"NOOOO— THAT'S THE GREENHOUSE EFFECT!"
[Host's breathing ability is stabilizing internal temperature.]
"That's LITERALLY an atmosphere regulating heat!"
[…]
Silence.
Of course.
Arin finally gave up arguing and sighed— mentally.
"…At least the atmosphere is forming. Even if the system calls it 'exhaling.'"
He examined his new layer of gases.
Thick clouds.
Burning skies.
A swirling veil of toxic fumes.
Primitive.
Chaotic.
Deadly.
But it was an atmosphere.
Arin felt a spark of hope.
"…Maybe one day, this world of mine will have water. Life. Weather. Storms."
The system suddenly spoke:
[Notice: Host is daydreaming.]
[Recording saved.]
"…I'll kill you, system."
He couldn't kill it.
But he could evolve.
And the next stage of planetary evolution was coming.
A stage filled with storms, lightning, oceans, and new skills the system would, inevitably, misunderstand.
Chapter 8. The Planet That "Punches Itself
Arin's new atmosphere thickened over the next few days.
Hot volcanic gases rose, cooled, condensed, and then rose again.
Storm clouds swirled violently across his sky — massive, dark, and crackling with energy.
He watched them form with curiosity.
"…So this is what early planetary weather is like?"
The swirling clouds churned faster and faster.
Ash mixed with steam.
Dust fused with molten particles.
Static electricity built until his entire sky felt like a charged wire.
And then—
CRAAACKKK!!
A blinding streak of white-blue lightning ripped across his atmosphere.
Millions of volts discharged instantly, tearing through the sky and slamming into his molten surface.
BOOOOMMMM!!
Arin felt it.
"O-OH— WHAT THE— THAT HURT!!"
More lightning followed, dancing across the sky like enraged serpents.
KRAAAK!!
BOOOOM!!
CRRRRAAAASH!!
Arin screamed internally.
"STOP HITTING ME! WHY AM I GETTING PUNCHED BY THE WEATHER!?"
The system chimed.
And Arin knew it was going to be stupid before it even spoke.
[Notice: Host is attacking himself.]
Arin froze.
"…what?"
[Notice: Host is continuously punching himself with electric-element attacks.]
"I— WHAT!? SYSTEM I'M NOT ATTACKING MYSELF, IT'S LIGHTNING!"
[Recording collected: Host self-harm attempt ×1]
"NO, NO, NO, NO— DELETE THAT!"
[Recording collected: Host electric punching his own body ×999+]
[Recording collected: Host repeatedly shocking himself ×5421]
[Recording collected: Host practicing electric martial arts alone ×211]
"ELECTRIC MARTIAL ARTS!? I'M A PLANET HAVING A STORM!"
But the system was proud:
[Notice: Sufficient self-punching records gathered.]
[Generating skill…]
Arin braced for stupidity.
[Skill generation successful.]
[Skill Generated: Shock Resistance]
{Effect: Host takes 1% less damage from electric-element punches.}
Arin stared blankly at the void.
"…No. I refuse. Not 'shock resistance.' Not 'electric punches.' I'm being hit by LIGHTNING. NORMAL PLANETARY PHENOMENON!"
[Host should stop punching himself.]
"I'M NOT—"
More lightning struck his surface.
CRACK!! → BOOOOOM!!
Arin yelled:
"STOP ELECTRIC-PUNCHING ME, SKY!"
The system beeped again.
[Notice: Host is shouting at himself.]
[Recording saved.]
"…I swear. I SWEAR I'm going to uninstall you."
But even while Arin raged, something else caught his attention.
The lightning… felt good.
Not emotionally.
Not mentally.
Physically.
His molten crust hardened slightly in the shock zones.
Minerals fused.
The first solid rocks began to form.
"…Wait. Is this lightning helping me cool and evolve?"
[Notice: Host is praising himself.]
[Recording saved.]
Arin rolled his metaphorical eyes.
"Fine. Whatever. Let the system think I'm doing martial arts on myself."
He watched lightning continue to dance across his sky.
Every strike helped shape him.
Every flash stabilized his forming crust.
Every boom carved his future landmasses.
"I guess this is the beginning of real weather…"
He looked at his dark swirling clouds.
"…And maybe the beginning of oceans too."
Far above him, thunder rumbled like distant laughter.
Chapter 9. A Planet With Too Much Blood
Centuries passed.
For Arin, the flow of time felt strange.
He no longer counted days by rotation or seasons by orbit.
He counted time by eruptions, storms, and system mistakes.
And over hundreds of years, two of his earliest skills began to evolve.
The system chimed after a long period of silence:
[Skill Evolution Notice]
[Skill {Bleeding} → Bleeding (Level 10)]
{Host bleeds 10% more efficiently while reducing blood consumption by 10%}
"Great," Arin muttered. "Now my volcanoes gush even MORE."
Another message appeared:
[Skill {Burning} → Burning (Level 10)]
{Host burns 10% more efficiently while reducing fuel consumption by 10%}
Arin sighed.
"So now I burn better and bleed more. Wonderful. Exactly what a planet needs."
But something ELSE evolved.
Something he didn't notice at first.
Because of his "Bleeding" skill, massive amounts of volcanic material kept being ejected from his surface. But due to reduced lava consumption and efficient burning, his core wasn't being depleted.
Instead…
New mass was slowly building up.
Not by much.
Barely noticeable at first.
But over hundreds of years, that tiny growth added up.
Arin's mass increased.
More mass meant more gravity.
More gravity meant more pressure deep inside him.
And more pressure meant…
Rock at extreme depths was slowly melting into magma.
His molten core was expanding.
Arin felt it.
"…Why do I feel like my stomach is getting hotter?"
After YEARS of this core expansion, something finally triggered in the system.
[Notice: Sufficient records of blood regeneration gathered.]
Arin tensed.
Oh no.
[Generating new skill…]
[Skill generation successful.]
[Skill Generated: Blood Regeneration]
{Effect: Host generates 1% more blood while consuming 1% fewer resources}
Arin's consciousness trembled.
"…WHAT!?"
He yelled so loudly the entire planetary mantle vibrated.
"YOU'RE TELLING ME I CAN NOW REGENERATE MORE LAVA IN MY CORE!?"
He panicked.
"That means MORE volcanoes! MORE eruptions! MORE bleeding! MORE mass!"
He imagined himself ten thousand years later—
A giant magma balloon.
Growing endlessly.
Burning endlessly.
Bleeding endlessly.
"IF THIS KEEPS GOING, WON'T I JUST KEEP GROWING INSANELY!?"
Then a horrifying thought hit him.
With mass increasing…
Gravity increasing…
Density increasing…
"…WILL I ONE DAY COLLAPSE INTO A BLACK HOLE!?"
He screamed at the system:
"SYSTEM! ANSWER ME! WILL I BECOME A BLACK HOLE!?"
The system calmly responded:
[Host should really have himself checked by a golem doctor.]
Arin wanted to cry magma.
The system continued:
[How can a normal golem collapse into a black hole just from bleeding, regenerating blood, and growing?]
[And Host has not even grown 1% in total size. Talking about black holes is unnecessary.]
Arin went silent.
Then whispered:
"…Are you looking down on my intelligence?"
There was a pause.
Arin waited.
And waited.
"SYSTEM? ANSWER ME."
[…]
Silence.
"SYSTEM!?"
[…]
Total silence.
Arin trembled with rage.
"DON'T YOU DARE GO SILENT ON ME NOW! I KNOW YOU CAN HEAR ME!"
Nothing.
Not even a beep.
"COWARD! COME BACK!"
Still nothing.
Arin sighed and calmed himself.
"…Fine. Ignore me. But I swear if I start turning into a star or black hole, I'm blaming you."
He looked inward.
His molten core surged.
New magma formed.
Volcanoes bubbled eagerly.
His planet was getting stronger.
Bigger.
More intense.
But also…
More alive.
"Fine… let's see where this evolution takes me."
Chapter 10. The Planet That "Cries" and "Bathes
Thousands of years passed.
Arin didn't feel age.
He didn't feel tired.
But he definitely felt hot.
Unreasonably hot.
Because his three cursed skills—Burning, Bleeding, and Blood Regeneration—kept making him produce more lava, more heat, and more eruptions than any natural planet should.
The result?
Arin took much longer to cool than any world in the universe.
Volcanoes that should've died after a few thousand years kept roaring for tens of thousands of years.
Eruptions that should've stopped continued endlessly because he kept regenerating "blood."
But eventually…
Just barely…
After countless eruptions and endless bleeding…
The rate of volcanic activity dropped.
From thousands of active volcanoes…
To hundreds…
To dozens…
To just a few glowing giants still spewing lava.
And afterward—
The world began to cool.
Slowly.
Painfully slowly.
But steadily.
First, his atmosphere cooled.
The thick toxic clouds gradually settled and thinned.
Steam condensed in the upper layers of the sky.
Temperatures finally dropped enough for water molecules to survive.
And then…
A miracle happened.
Rain.
Soft, delicate droplets fell from the sky for the very first time in Arin's entire existence.
But the moment the water hit his still-hot crust—
SSSSSSHHHHHHHH!!!!
Steam exploded outward.
The water evaporated instantly, rose back into the sky, condensed again, and fell as rain again.
A continuous cycle.
Rain → Steam → Clouds → Rain
Over and over again.
Arin watched it in awe.
"…So this is the first rainfall… this is how planets cool…"
He felt something warm inside him—emotionally, not physically for once.
His world was changing.
Days passed.
Rain continued endlessly.
Until—
DING!
The system spoke.
And Arin immediately regretted being alive.
[Enough records of Crying gathered.]
Arin's consciousness jolted.
"…SYSTEM. NO. I AM NOT CRYING. IT'S RAIN."
The system ignored him entirely.
[Generating skill…]
[Skill generated.]
[Skill: Crying]
{Effect: Host can cry 1% more while consuming 1% less water.}
Arin stared, horrified.
"…WHAT!? CRY MORE!? LESS WATER CONSUMPTION!?"
He checked himself.
Rain continued falling.
The water cycle continued.
The atmosphere thickened.
He panicked.
"WAIT— IF I CAN 'CRY' MORE EFFICIENTLY… WON'T MY WATER LEVEL JUST KEEP GOING UP!?"
A terrifying thought hit him.
"One day I might be FULLY covered in water… A WATER PLANET!"
He paused.
Then thought deeper.
"…But Earth had that stage too. The water world stage. Maybe this is good. Maybe this means life will form…"
He actually felt excited.
But unfortunately, the system was not done.
Another message popped up:
[Enough records of Bathing gathered.]
Arin blinked.
"…Bathing?… No… no please don't—"
The system continued:
[Generating skill…]
[Skill generated.]
[Bathing]
{Effect: Host can wash 1% more efficiently while consuming 1% less water.}
Arin went silent.
Very silent.
"…SYSTEM, YOU— YOU ARE AT LEAST A LITTLE RIGHT THIS TIME."
He admitted reluctantly.
"I guess a planet covered in rain IS kind of like bathing…"
But then he realized something horrifying.
Bathing increased water efficiency.
Crying increased water output.
Water was now regenerating faster.
Water levels were rising.
Rain was increasing.
"…Oh no. I'm going to overflow."
Lightning crackled in the distance.
Arin muttered:
"First I bleed lava endlessly. Now I'm going to drown myself in rain…"
But inside, he felt a spark of hope.
Water meant oceans.
Oceans meant chemistry.
Chemistry meant life.
His voice trembled with excitement:
"…System… do you think my planet can have life one day?"
The system responded immediately:
[…]
Silence.
Of course.
Arin sighed.
"Well… if you won't answer, then I'll find out myself."
Chapter 11. The Planet That "Stored His Bathwater
Thousands of years passed.
Rain fell endlessly.
Storms roared.
Clouds churned.
And for the first time in his entire existence…
Arin's crust cooled enough to let water survive.
The endless downpour stopped evaporating instantly.
Puddles formed.
Lakes grew.
Valleys filled.
And slowly—beautifully—
The First Ocean Began to Form.
Water gathered into deep basins, swirling and steaming softly but no longer disappearing.
Arin felt excitement pulse through his core.
"…My first ocean… this is it. This is how life begins…"
He watched the water spread, joining into massive seas.
Rain continued to fall like blessings.
The world cooled.
The surface stabilized.
Everything was perfect.
Until the system woke up.
---
DING!
[Notice: Host is accumulating large amounts of bathwater.]
Arin blinked.
"…wait—what?"
[Notice: Host is storing the water used to wash himself.]
"…SYSTEM NO— THAT'S NOT BATHWATER! IT'S AN OCEAN!"
The system continued proudly:
[Recording collected: Host gathering bathwater ×9999+]
[Recording collected: Host soaking continuously ×412]
[Recording collected: Host refusing to drain the bath ×105]
Arin felt a tectonic migraine coming on.
"I'M NOT REFUSING TO DRAIN ANYTHING—THIS IS A WATER CYCLE!"
But the system didn't care.
It continued processing:
[Enough bathing-water-storage records gathered.]
[Generating skill…]
[Skill generated.]
[Skill: Bathwater Storage]
{Effect: Host can retain 1% more water while losing 1% less to evaporation.}
Arin went silent.
"…Did you just give me a SKILL for storing bathwater?"
Volcanoes around the planet erupted in embarrassment.
Steam burst into the sky.
Lightning cracked above the new forming sea.
Arin groaned:
"Great. So now I have Bathing, Crying, and Bathwater Storage.
My entire hydrological cycle is classified as a SPA DAY."
But the system wasn't finished.
[Notice: Host is sitting comfortably inside warm bathwater.]
Arin nearly melted.
"I'M NOT SITTING IN ANYTHING—THE WATER IS COOLING MY SURFACE!"
More messages appeared:
[Recording collected: Host enjoying a hot bath ×231]
[Recording collected: Host refusing to step out of the tub ×98]
Arin threw a lightning bolt at himself in pure frustration.
"STOP LOGGING THAT!! I'M A PLANET, NOT A NUDIST IN A BATHTUB!"
Finally, the system quieted.
Arin sighed and looked at his oceans.
Deep, swirling, beautiful.
"…Call it bathwater all you want. This is the beginning of life."
He felt the ocean currents forming.
The surface cooling.
Minerals dissolving.
Chemistry awakening.
Something was happening.
Something new.
Deep in his oceans, at volcanic vents…
12. The Planet That "Grew Hair in Its Bathwater"
Arin's oceans churned with heat, minerals, and volcanic chemicals.
Deep beneath the surface, in the dark zones around hydrothermal vents, something miraculous was happening.
Minerals dissolved.
Chemicals reacted.
Energy surged.
And the first organic molecules began forming.
Amino acids.
Fatty chains.
Little strands of carbon-based structures.
To a scientist?
This was the dawn of life.
To Arin?
"…Cool! This looks like the beginning of evolution!"
To the system?
DING!
[Notice: Strange hair-like filaments forming inside Host's bathwater.]
Arin immediately froze.
"…Pardon?"
Another message appeared instantly:
[Recording collected: Host shedding inside the bath ×384872]
Arin screamed internally.
"I AM NOT SHEDDING ANYTHING! THAT'S ORGANIC CHEMISTRY! NOT HAIR!"
The system ignored him like always.
[Recording collected: Host producing loose strands ×1048387]
[Recording collected: Host losing body hair ×9984879]
Arin roared:
"BODY HAIR!? I DON'T EVEN HAVE A BODY!"
Lightning exploded across his surface.
Huge waves slammed into his new coastlines.
Volcanoes belched steam in confusion.
But the system continued in its calm monotone:
[Notice: Sufficient 'hair formation' records collected.]
[Generating skill…]
Arin prayed silently.
Please don't be something humiliating. Please. Please.
The system dinged.
[Skill generation successful.]
Arin braced himself.
[Skill Generated: Hair Formation]
{Effect: Host forms hair-like filaments 1% faster while consuming 1% less material.}
Arin almost died.
"…You're telling me I now have a SKILL…
for producing HAIR…
INSIDE MY OCEAN!?"
Steam burst from vents.
Earthquakes rattled his crust.
Waves crashed violently.
He was having a full planetary meltdown.
"THAT'S NOT HAIR! THAT'S THE FIRST ORGANIC MOLECULES! THAT'S PRE-LIFE SLIME! THAT'S THE START OF EVOLUTION!"
The system beeped cheerfully.
[Host's hair growth rate increasing.]
Arin nearly flipped his tectonic plates.
"STOP CALLING IT HAIR! I'M NOT A FURRY PLANET!"
But the system continued:
[Notice: Host's bathwater is becoming increasingly hairy.]
[Warning: Bath hygiene decreasing.]
[Recording: Host ignoring hair buildup ×48936939]
Arin's rage hit maximum temperature.
"I'M NOT IGNORING HAIR! THAT IS LITERAL PROTO-LIFE!"
But the system delivered the final blow:
[Host should consider cleaning himself more often.]
Arin fell silent.
Very silent.
"…System… one day… I swear… I'm going to replace you. Or throw you into the sun."
But even as he raged, he noticed something beautiful.
Those hair-like organic chains were evolving.
Linking.
Growing.
Becoming more complex.
Life… was coming.
Arin's anger softened.
"…If being misinterpreted as 'hair' is the price for evolution…
then fine. Let it be hair."
His oceans shimmered.
His vents glowed.
And his world continued to grow.
But evolution wasn't done.
Chapter 13. The Planet That "Made Slime in His Bathwater"
Deep in Arin's oceans, something astonishing was happening.
The constant rain had cooled the surface.
Chemical-rich volcanic vents pumped minerals into the water.
Heat mixed with molecules.
Pressure fused components.
And, slowly…
clumps of primitive organic material began forming.
Protocells.
Not real life yet.
Not even proper cells.
Just fragile bubbles of fatty acids and amino acids — the earliest building blocks of biology.
Arin felt the subtle change.
"…This is it. The first step toward life… protocells."
He was excited.
But, unfortunately, someone else noticed too.
DING!
[Notice: Slippery sludge forming inside Host's bathwater.]
Arin blinked.
"…System, that's not sludge. Those are protocells—primitive chemical structures."
The system ignored him completely.
[Recording collected: Host generating slime ×128948]
[Recording collected: Host's bathwater becoming slimy ×408472]
[Recording collected: Suspicious goo detected ×9618484l]
Arin felt a volcanic vein pulsing.
"It's NOT slime, you idiot—this is pre-life organic chemistry!"
System:
[Warning: Host's hygiene quality decreasing.]
[Warning: Bathwater contamination rising.]
Arin nearly boiled his entire ocean out of embarrassment.
"HYGIENE!? I'M A PLANET! THIS IS LITERALLY HOW LIFE BEGINS!"
But the system was already processing the situation:
[Enough records of slime accumulation gathered.]
[Generating skill…]
Arin braced himself.
[Skill generation successful.]
[Skill: Slime Formation]
Effect: Host produces 1% more slime while consuming 1% fewer resources.
Arin stared into cosmic space.
"…Great. Just perfect. I now officially have a skill for producing slime in my own oceans."
He felt existential dread.
"I'm becoming a giant… cosmic… SLIME FACTORY!"
The system added another punch to his pride:
[Recommendation: Host should clean himself regularly to avoid slime buildup.]
Arin howled:
"I CAN'T CLEAN THE OCEAN! THOSE ARE PROTOCELLS—THEY'RE SUPPOSED TO BE THERE!"
But the system simply logged:
[Recording collected: Host refusing to maintain hygiene ×37]
Arin nearly triggered a continent-wide earthquake from rage.
Still…
as the system misunderstood, Arin watched the protocells closely.
They wobbled.
They held their shape.
They clumped together.
They survived the currents.
Not alive.
But close.
Very close.
Arin felt a thrill.
"…Soon… one of these will become a true cell."
Chapter 14. The Planet That "Gave Birth
For thousands of years, Arin watched the slime in his oceans grow thicker.
To him, those tiny blobs were protocells —
primitive, unstable, incomplete.
Just the warm-up stage before real life.
But slowly…
some of the protocells began to change.
Their membranes strengthened.
Their inner chemistry stabilized.
Their contents organized themselves…
Until finally—
Something inside one of the protocells "clicked."
A simple self-replicating molecule emerged.
A metabolic reaction sparked.
A true cell membrane formed.
It was microscopic.
It was fragile.
But it was alive.
Arin felt the moment it happened.
"…A true cell…! Life… real life… has started."
His oceans trembled as he sensed the tiny spark of existence.
But before he could savor the miracle—
DING!
The system exploded with joy.
[Miracle event detected.]
Arin's excitement froze instantly.
"Oh no… no no no—"
[Miracle record recorded.]
[Host has done the impossible.]
[Host as a golem has given birth to an organic being.]
Arin went completely silent.
"…WHAT."
The system continued proudly:
[Congratulations, Host.]
[Your first child has been born.]
Arin shrieked loud enough to rattle his tectonic plates:
"I DID NOT GIVE BIRTH! THAT IS BIOLOGICAL EVOLUTION! IT IS A CELL! A CELL! I AM NOT A PARENT!"
But the system refused to listen.
[Recording collected: Host delivering microscopic baby ×1]
[Recording collected: Host producing stable offspring ×1]
[Recording collected: Host nurturing child in warm bathwater ×114]
Arin felt actual physical pain.
"WARM BATHWATER!? THAT'S AN OCEAN!!"
System:
[Host should name his child for emotional bonding.]
Arin recoiled so hard an entire coastline cracked.
"WHY WOULD I NAME A BACTERIA!?"
But the system wasn't done.
It continued processing:
[Enough miracle-birth records gathered.]
[Generating skill…]
Arin buried his consciousness under a continent.
"Please… PLEASE don't humiliate me further…"
[Skill generation successful.]
[Skill: Child Protection]
{Effect: Probability of offspring dying decreases by 1%.
Reproductive ability increases by 1%.
Offspring genetic stability increases by 1%.
Evolution potential increases by 1%.}
Arin stared into space, defeated.
"…I'm a daycare now. I've become a daycare planet."
The system chimed warmly:
[Host should take pride in being a responsible parent.]
Arin exploded.
"IT'S A SINGLE CELL! A MICROSCOPIC ORGANISM! I'M NOT A MOTHER, I'M A PLANET!"
But the system added another message:
[Host has entered the parental stage of life.]
A lightning storm erupted out of sheer humiliation.
"I HAVE NO STAGES OF LIFE! I'M A ROCK WITH AN OCEAN!!"
But deep inside, beneath the rage…
He felt something.
A tiny spark.
The first living cell drifted gently in the ocean currents.
He whispered to himself:
"…Life… actual life… on my world."
The system instantly ruined the moment:
[Host bonding with newborn.]
Arin screamed again.