The Sage I
Today, let's talk about mirrors.
Last time, we discussed the most famous ship in the world. Today's story is about the most famous mirror: the 'Magic Mirror' from the Snow White fairy tale, the one used for beauty care.
- Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the fairest of them all?
- For the 3,714th time, there is none fairer than the queen. Please stop asking.
In essence, the magic mirror had a database, statistics, and AI capabilities to search up all humans on Earth.
Humanity had already invented ChatGPT centuries ago. However, instead of investing this incredible lost technology in domestic politics, the queen used it for ego searching. The history of politicians getting distracted by their smartphones is ancient.
Come to think of it, it's quite a wise fairy tale. Even if the most powerful tool is given to humans, they will ultimately use it for 'searching.'
If the Brothers Grimm were alive today and saw social media, wouldn't they proudly say, "See, we were right"?
"Undertaker, Your Excellency."
"Hmm? What's up?"
However, even the Brothers Grimm couldn't have predicted this.
One day, Yu Ji-won came to me and said, "I think I've discovered a new monster."
"A new monster?"
"Yes, but it's a bit unusual."
It was the 7th cycle. At that time, the Ten Legs still ruled the Korean Peninsula as the final boss, and Old Man Scho still had hopes and dreams.
Originally, I worked under Dang Seo-rin as the vice guild leader, but from the 7th cycle onward, I began my path of independence. It was because Old Man Scho persuaded me to start a business together.
Like someone who leaves a big company to join a startup, my life was a bit tangled. However, Yu Ji-won still visited me weekly for chats, like an investor who believes in micro-adjustments and buying the dip, convinced that "The fact is, the regressor is getting healthier."
Many suspected Yu Ji-won and I were dating due to these frequent meetings.
Old Man Scho was a prime example. How ironic. This old man never really helped my life at all.
"What's so unusual about it?"
"Well, it's hard to describe. Ah, would you like to come and see after eating?"
And so I went.
This 'new monster' was surprisingly located in Yu Ji-won's private room. It was in the middle of a room filled with books, with nothing but a bookshelf for furniture.
I frowned. "...A mirror?"
The anomaly was a full-length mirror.
"Yes. I found it by chance while walking and brought it back. It's rare to find a mirror so clean and spotless these days."
"No... Haven't you heard the old saying not to pick up or even look at discarded mirrors because they're bad luck?"
"I don't believe in such superstitions," stated firmly the wise investor who had staked her entire fortune on the regressor's coin.
At the time, I had not yet figured out the correlation between anomalies and curses, so I just clicked my tongue. "Why? Is it a portal to another world?"
"No. Look." Yu Ji-won approached the mirror. "Mirror, mirror."
She was whispering to the mirror.
I wondered if she had another mental illness hidden under her psychopathy, but then something surprising happened.
- Please die immediately.
"Huh?"
- Please die immediately.
The mirror responded.
Yu Ji-won turned to me, surprised. "Did you hear that?"
"Uh, yeah. I heard it."
"I tested it with my guild members, and they all got the same response."
"Told to die immediately?"
"Yes. All 36 members of the Samcheon World guild received the same answer."
"...It's really a cursed object."
"Is that so?"
Yu Ji-won was indifferent. She kept a clearly cursed object in her private room, a testament to her unique mindset.
"Anyway, it seemed too unusual to handle carelessly, so I sought your advice," she said matter-of-factly. "Mishandling it could lead to trouble. You're an expert in this field, right, Undertaker?"
"Hmm."
"What do you think is the best way to deal with this?"
"...How about putting it back where you found it? Unless it has legs, it won't follow you."
"Indeed. A wise decision."
Three days later.
"Your Excellency, there's a minor problem."
"...Now what?"
"As per your guidance, I disposed of the mirror. But now the bathroom mirror is giving the same response."
"What?"
According to Yu Ji-won's testimony, she had really thrown away the cursed mirror. Then, the bathroom mirror she saw first thing in the morning gave the same curse.
- Please die immediately.
The mirror repeated the same words.
Naturally, Yu Ji-won also removed and discarded this bathroom mirror. The next day, Yu Ji-won went to Dang Seo-rin's office to report in, and when she glanced at the desk mirror there...
- Please die immediately.
Yu Ji-won finally realized.
The anomaly did not reside in a specific mirror. It transformed whichever mirror Yu Ji-won looked at first each day into a cursed one.
"What... What kind of principle is that?"
The novice regressor of the 7th cycle was confused.
"Why do mirrors turn weird when you look at them?"
"I don't know either," she replied.
"And the mirror talks? Like some fairytale magic mirror―"
I stopped talking. I had just noticed something about Yu Ji-won's appearance. More precisely, I had re-registered the color of her hair.
"..."
"Your Excellency? Why are you looking at me like that?"
* The mirror talks.
* Her silver hair is like freshly fallen snow.
* Among all the people I've seen in my life, her face is the most refined.
* I could exaggerate a bit and say she is the 'fairest of them all'.
"Oh...."
I couldn't help but sigh. A conclusion quickly formed in my mind.
"...?"
That's right.
Yu Ji-won.
This psychopath was the Snow White of the Korean Peninsula.
Mirrors have no eyes.
So it would be unreasonable to ask an anomaly that mistook Yu Ji-won for Snow White if it was blind. Insulting a truly eyeless entity would be a slur. As the Undertaker, I did not casually insult anyone other than Old Man Scho, Yu Ji-won, and Sim Ah-ryeon.
- Please die immediately.
"Hmm."
- Please die immediately.
"..."
But something was off. The anomaly was too passive for a monster.
Even in the 7th and 8th cycles, the Magic Mirror didn't cause any particular trouble. It just passively suggested suicide, which was unpleasant but not overly aggressive compared to other anomalies actively ending human lives.
This raised the question: 'What exactly does this anomaly do?'
As far as I knew, the Magic Mirror in Snow White was an AI that kindly answered questions, not some suicide advocate.
"Mirror, mirror, what are you?"
- Please die immediately.
"Mirror, mirror, would Bitcoin have hit 300 million if civilization were intact?"
- Please die immediately.
"Mirror, do you want to die?"
- Please die immediately.
"..."
Unlike the fairy tale, the Magic Mirror responded consistently to any question. It would have made an excellent spokesperson for a politician.
However, it wasn't just a recorder repeating predetermined responses.
"Wow? Old man, it speaks German too!"
Surprisingly, when Old Man Scho stood in front of the mirror, it suggested suicide in German.
The mirror's language proficiency wasn't limited to Korean and German. We later brought in magical girls, and it fluently responded in Japanese. Hindi. Russian. Filipino. Arabic. French. Chinese. Portuguese. Vietnamese. Spanish. Swahili. There was no language the mirror couldn't speak. It truly was the most advanced AI in history.
'So it understands its counterpart. But why doesn't its response change based on the person?'
Sometime later, I first got a clue to this mystery centuries later, in the 41st cycle.
"Ji-won, how have you been?"
"Thanks to your care, I'm doing fine in Samcheon World."
"Is the mirror still the same?"
"Yes. Since there's no point in discarding it, I just leave it alone."
I walked past the full-length mirror without a second thought. I didn't look directly at it, just glanced at it.
Then.
- Next time, get infected with Udumbara before dying.
I passed by without much thought but then stopped abruptly.
"Huh?"
"Hm?"
Yu Ji-won and I spoke simultaneously. Then our eyes met.
"Ji-won, did you...?"
"Yes, I heard it too."
I approached the mirror again, just to be sure.
Then.
- Next time, get infected with Udumbara before dying.
It changed. For centuries, the mirror had given the same response to everyone, but now it was different.
"Ji-won, come here."
"Understood."
Yu Ji-won and I switched places.
- Please die immediately.
Then it gave the usual response.
Yu Ji-won nodded expressionlessly. "How strange. I'll bring others to test it."
Dozens of members from Samcheon World, including Dang Seo-rin, were brought for testing. The results were the same. Everyone except me received the response, "Please die immediately."
Conclusion:
"It seems the mirror's response only changes for the Undertaker."
"..."
"This again proves that the Undertaker is special. But may I ask, what is Udumbara, Your Excellency?"
"Oh."
Sharp readers might recall that the 41st cycle was when I first defeated Udumbara. Naturally, except for me and the Saintess, no one knew about Udumbara. I eradicated it before it fully bloomed and spread the New Buddha virus.
"That's a World Tree I defeated before anyone knew about it. It looks like it grants eternal life, but in reality, it digests its infected as nutrients after a certain point."
"Hmm."
"But Awakeners should never get infected. You'd lose your awakening abilities."
Yu Ji-won tilted her head. "Lose awakening abilities?"
"Yeah. If you get infected, you'll lose your Mini-Map ability."
"What if, by any chance, the Undertaker gets infected?"
"Well, naturally, various abilities would be deleted. Complete Memory and Resume."
Yu Ji-won rested her chin on her hand, lightly touching her chin with her index finger, a habit when she was deep in thought. After a while, she spoke slowly. "This might be a blasphemous question..."
"You're always blasphemous, so go ahead."
"If the Undertaker gets infected with Udumbara."
"If I get infected?"
Yu Ji-won said, "Wouldn't the Regression ability be deleted too, leading to your true death?"
-x-X-x-
The Sage II
This might seem sudden, but I want to pose a question.
Have you ever wondered about this while reading stories where the protagonist is an infinite regressor?
- The final boss is defeated! The protagonist finally reaches a happy ending! THE END!
- So, what now?
- What happens if the protagonist grows old, surrounded by loved ones and dies? Does he regress again? Does he repeat the same life?
Exactly.
For a regressor, a happy ending is not what's truly important. With the infinite regression coin in hand, a happy ending is just another outcome, akin to a gacha that you keep playing until you get the desired result. The real issue lies beyond the happy ending.
There's a hypothesis that suggests regressors might never truly find an end. They might have to eternally repeat the lives they've lived and the lives they will live. This is the so-called Never Ending Story hypothesis. Many creative works employ various means to avoid this Never Ending Story. The simplest and most elegant solution is to grant the protagonist eternal life.
- What if the protagonist dies of old age and gets trapped in an infinite Tsukuyomi? Let's make him incapable of natural death.
This solves all problems. The protagonist won't die of old age, thus preventing the repetition of regressions. The problem is that life always presents practical challenges, and eternal life doesn't exist in the world I live in.
However, there was a virus resembling eternal life.
"Well, what can you do? If I get infected with Udumbara, I'll lose my regression ability and eventually die a normal death."
My answer was calm. I had considered this issue multiple times long before Yu Ji-won asked.
"No, that's a serious problem!"
The one who was truly panicked wasn't me but Yu Ji-won. The psychopath who staked her life on my success wrinkled her brow like crumpled foil. "Your Excellency! Such a harmful anomaly must be eradicated immediately upon sight!"
"Yes. Don't worry, I go to Onyang and exterminate it every time I regress."
"No! The mere fact that you're in contact with such an anomaly worries me greatly. Please, let me handle its extermination from now on!"
"Sure. So, you're saying you want to keep Udumbara's seeds and use them as a trump card to betray me if necessary?"
"Heavens! How could you imagine such a terrible thing! Why don't you understand my loyalty to you...?"
Yu Ji-won's outbursts were always something to be ignored.
I looked at the magic mirror again.
- Next time, get infected with Udumbara before dying.
"Hmm."
It was indeed intriguing. The mirror knew exactly what could truly kill me, the regressor.
"Ji-won."
"Yes, Your Excellency! If you wish, I can show my loyalty by cutting out my heart right now..."
"If you say one more ridiculous thing, I won't tell you that I'm a regressor in the next cycle."
"Upon further reflection, I believe I may not have understood the concept of loyalty."
"Good. Anyway, this mirror seems to know that I'm a regressor, doesn't it?"
"Hm? Mmm? Hmm..." Yu Ji-won moved closer to me, her hand still resting on her chin.
In the full-length mirror, both of us were reflected side by side.
- Please die immediately.
- Next time, get infected with Udumbara before dying.
The mirror from the fairy tale, functioning like ChatGPT, cleverly provided two different responses based on the number of users.
"See? The mirror tells me to die 'next time,' not 'now.'"
"Hmm. Yes."
"When it says 'next time,' it probably means the next regression cycle. It's telling me to get infected with Udumbara in the next cycle and then die."
"...Indeed. Listening to you, it seems that way." The furrow in Yu Ji-won's brow deepened. "In that case, this anomaly must possess considerable power. It means it has seen through your identity and abilities."
I nodded. "I think so too. This is no ordinary anomaly."
"...But still, it's strange, Your Excellency. For an anomaly with such insight and information, why would it only curse people to die?"
"That's the same question I have."
We stared at each other silently. Our thoughts converged on one question.
What exactly was this anomaly?
"...It's definitely the mirror from the Snow White fairy tale."
"But Your Excellency. In Snow White, the queen asked the mirror first while our mirror answered on its own without any questions."
"And all its answers are always the same. Even the response to me is essentially the same as for everyone else: 'die.' What kind of predetermined answer is this?"
"Could it be an anomaly that maintains its identity across regressions? That's how it learned about you being a regressor."
"If this anomaly is powerful enough to transcend regressions, it's even stranger. Why would it hide in your bedroom and only tell people to die? Is it a stalker?"
"Hmm. Maybe I'm just that important?"
"The anomaly must be blind."
"...I can't figure out its identity at all."
"...Neither can I."
In the end, we admitted defeat in the 41st cycle. We surrendered, unable to guess the anomaly's nature or purpose. In one cycle, out of frustration, I even broke the mirror, which only backfired.
"Your Excellency, didn't you break the magic mirror and discard it last time?"
"Yes."
"Since then, the appearance rate of voids has skyrocketed around the area where you dumped the glass shards. The number of anomalies has also increased exponentially."
"..."
I later discovered this was the so-called 'broken windows' effect. You know, the theory that if a broken window is left unattended, the crime rate around it increases. The magic mirror, like the heart of an archer who participated in the Holy Grail War, was made of glass. When broken, the same thing happened. The area was fucked up.
"In summary, we know almost nothing about this anomaly's identity..."
"Meanwhile, the anomaly knows everything about you and possibly other humans."
"And if we destroy it, the broken windows effect will attract other anomalies like flies?"
"Yes. Leaving it alone feels unsettling, and destroying it causes disasters."
"And yet, if left alone, it merely tells people to die without causing any actual harm?"
"Exactly."
"Shit. What the hell is this thing?"
"The mystery deepens."
I couldn't believe such an anomaly existed.
To make matters worse, the magic mirror's answers subtly changed as the regressions continued. From the 41st to the 116th cycle, the answers remained the same. Then, in the 117th cycle, the response suddenly updated.
- Stuff all newly born lives. They are the same anyway. Then get infected with Udumbara and die.
"..."
Newly born lives.
These were children who hadn't been born in previous regressions but were newly born in this one.
For example, the little girl who gave me a sugar-coated donut in Haeundae. Jung Seo-ah, the daughter of a bakery owner, only existed in the 19th cycle.
- Stuff all newly born lives. They are the same anyway. Then get infected with Udumbara and die.
The magic mirror advised me to 'stuff' these lives.
"Stuff? What does that mean, Your Excellency?"
"..."
Yu Ji-won couldn't understand this at all and tilted her head. It was likely that everyone would have had the same reaction.
Only I understood the true meaning of the mirror's words.
'...It's telling me to use Time Seal.'
Stuffed in time. Sealed in time. It allowed a person to relive their happiest day over and over but erased them from everyone's memory in return.
The magic mirror was pointing out my ability.
'It sees through my regression ability and my time-sealing ability. This mirror.'
In the 19th cycle, Jung Seo-ah wasn't remembered by anyone, not even by her parents, because in other cycles, a different child was born instead of Jung Seo-ah. So, whether I used the Time Seal or not, it didn't matter. No one remembered Jung Seo-ah except me.
- Stuff all newly born lives. They are the same anyway. Then get infected with Udumbara and die.
Therefore, the outcome of being forgotten by everyone was the same anyway. So, why not grant them the mercy of reliving their happiest day forever?
Wouldn't that be far better than falling into the abyss of death, regressor? Experiencing eternal happiness in a grave you've built―
The magic mirror whispered this to me.
'Ah.'
That's when I realized the nature of this anomaly—or rather, I understood the principle behind its actions.
The magic mirror from Snow White.
It might sound strange, but this anomaly was simply trying to show people a 'happy ending.'
King Midas. The one who appears in Greek mythology.
Yes, the king famous for the Midas touch. Whatever he touched turned into gold. He was practically the Federal Reserve Board of ancient times.
There's a less well-known legend associated with King Midas.
One day, the king captured a sage who was half-man, half-beast. The upper half was human, and the lower half was a horse or goat. As ever, the fate of a captured nonhuman by humans was pitiful. The king, after intimidating the sage, made a very human demand.
- Hey, you! Give us humans the best and greatest happiness!
- Eek...
The sage was reluctant to answer. He was tired of being treated like a lottery ticket by humans.
The king, frustrated by the sage's resistance, used another 'very human' solution. He force-fed the sage with strong liquor until he was intoxicated beyond resistance. Only then did the sage, heavily drunk, comply with the king's demand.
- Huh, you foolish mayflies. I was keeping silent for your sake, but why do you keep forcing me to answer? How annoying...
- What?
- For your kind, the 'best and greatest happiness' is impossible.
Because...
- The 'ultimate happiness' is never being born, never existing, remaining in non-existence. For humans, not being born is the best fate. If born, dying quickly is the next best thing.
- ...
No definitive account exists of how the human king reacted to this epic insult.
Nietzsche's book also introduces this story, essentially saying:
- Humans always ask about happiness.
- But ultimate happiness doesn't exist for humans because life is suffering.
- Therefore, the only happiness is not to suffer, and the wise thing is to escape suffering as quickly as possible.
- It's better to have not been born.
A firm conclusion indeed.
I suddenly recalled this story while discussing the magic mirror.
"Ji-won, the magic mirror has been answering our questions all along."
"What do you mean, Your Excellency?"
"Think about it. No matter what question you ask, all questions ultimately lead to one fundamental question."
"One fundamental question."
"Yes."
Mirror, mirror. Tell me how to be happy.
"What lottery numbers should I pick, how can I reconcile with my family, how can I succeed? The questions humans ask the magic mirror are all aimed at achieving their happiness and well-being."
"..."
"So from the mirror's perspective, our questions are superficial and the essence is the same."
"Tell me how to be happy... That's what the mirror hears from us, Your Excellency."
Exactly.
The mirror already knew what we would ask, even without hearing our voices, and so it answered automatically whenever it sensed us approaching.
- Please die immediately.
Instant death.
That's the only happiness allowed to humans in this void-stained world.
I tapped the mirror. "In the Snow White fairy tale, this item is called the magic mirror. In ancient times, a magician symbolized a sage."
"A sage, you say."
"Yes. Also, in Harry Potter, the magic mirror hides the Philosopher's Stone. So, the name of this anomaly before us is―"
The Sage's Mirror.
That was its true name.
"The Sage's Mirror... Indeed. A fitting name." Yu Ji-won, resting her chin on her hand, nodded. "As expected of the Undertaker. So, how should we deal with this anomaly...?"
"Do nothing. It suggests death to humans, so it probably wishes for its own disappearance. It won't cause trouble."
"..."
"If it gets too noisy, cover it with a blanket. Maybe the mirror finds true happiness in reflecting nothing but darkness."
"Certainly. That makes sense."
Yu Ji-won brought an airplane blanket (probably found somewhere; habits die hard) and covered the mirror. Just before the mirror was completely enveloped in darkness, it spoke in a voice as emotionless as Yu Ji-won's.
- Please die immediately.
Srrrk.
Then, the mirror fell silent.
There's an epilogue.
In every regression, the Sage's Mirror almost always appeared in Yu Ji-won's vicinity. Since I had figured out how to deal with it, I didn't pay much attention. But whenever I visited Yu Ji-won's room, I'd lift the blanket to check the mirror.
Why? Just out of curiosity, wondering if the response had changed.
- Stuff all newly born lives. They are the same anyway. Then get infected with Udumbara and die.
Of course, the mirror's answer rarely changed. From the 117th to the 430th cycle, it remained the same. It kept advising me to stuff the lives of poor beings before I died.
'A useless answer. Well, that's how sage's sayings often are.'
Even a regressor's curiosity has its limits. Seeing no sign of change, I eventually stopped checking the mirror.
Then, suddenly, in the 593rd cycle, I remembered.
'Has the answer changed by now?'
The 593rd cycle was when I successfully defeated the Infinite Metagame. It was also the cycle when the young Overreader arrogantly declared she would save me.
At that time, the mirror was still in Yu Ji-won's private room. So for the first time in a long while, I lifted the blanket, a reunion a thousand years in the making.
"..."
The mirror was clean. And quiet.
Although Yu Ji-won probably didn't take care of it, there wasn't a speck of dust on it. It seemed to look into my face and my soul.
Silence followed.
I wondered why it was so quiet.
- Keep living.
"..."
- Keep living.
I heard footsteps behind me. "Hmm? Undertaker, Your Excellency? You're here?"
"..."
"It's unusual for you to visit me. Did something happen?"
The mirror reflected the dim image of Yu Ji-won's figure.
The voice softly echoed again.
- Keep living.
"..."
I quietly covered the mirror with the blanket and stood up. Then, I smiled at Yu Ji-won.
"No, nothing happened."
"...?"
"Let's have a barbecue and drink for the first time in a while."
"Ah, sounds good."
-x-X-x-
The Addict I
Mirrors symbolize self-reflection, objectivity, enlightenment, and awareness. However, bathroom mirrors are an exception. Bathroom mirrors represent baseless self-confidence, a failure in self-objectivity, overestimation of one's appearance, ignorance, and blindness.
There was someone around me who could be aptly called the "Bathroom Mirror of the Korean Peninsula."
Sim Ah-ryeon? No, compared to this person, even Sim Ah-ryeon would be considered sane.
The protagonist of this tale is none other than:
"I am the Marquess of Yuldoguk."
"..."
"Moreover, I am the greatest under heaven, in both the present and all of history."
He was an elderly Sword Marquess with an unparalleled ability to lower everyone's SAN points when introducing himself.
"Sir."
"..."
"...Marquess, Your Excellency."
"Hm? Oh, Brother Undertaker, so you were there. I didn't notice your presence. Truly, your skill in hiding your presence is befitting someone with the greatest internal power in the Three Han States!"
"..."
My head was already starting to hurt, but I couldn't run away. There was a deeper reason for this.
It was the 671st cycle. The Public Officer specializing in Sword Marquesss, Noh Do-hwa, had been bedridden with the Void Poison infection. The audacity of that bacteria, to infect someone when there was no one else left to which it could spread itself, was commendable. Because of this, I was the only one left to negotiate with the elderly Sword Marquess.
If you're wondering if there were no talented people in the National Road Management Corps... well, there weren't. What do you expect in an apocalypse? After the fall of civilization, the talent pool in Korea was comparable to Shu Han right after the Battle of Yiling.[1]
That's the end of the explanation.
"Marquess, Your Excellency. This week, it was your turn to visit Gimhae Plain and tend to the land. Why did you leave without informing anyone? This will ruin the spring harvest."
"Bah! Being so preoccupied with such mundane matters is why the world is in chaos! I have far more pressing duties!"
If we dropped that "mundane" task, everyone in Busan would starve to death. If Busan fell, the entire infrastructure of the Korean Peninsula would go with it in a domino effect. I engraved the character 忍 for "endure" on my heart and maintained my business smile.
"...I must have misunderstood your grand vision. If you consider it so pressing, it must be a significant matter."
"Haha, now you're talking sense. That's why I like you, Brother Undertaker."
"If it's not too presumptuous, may I ask what this pressing duty is?"
"Of course!" With a flourish, the Sword Marquess pulled something from his sleeve (yes, the long sleeves you'd see in historical dramas) and placed it on the table. "Look at this! You have no idea how much I've suffered because of this strange and wicked thing!"
I looked.
The item described as "strange and wicked" was indeed peculiar. Its body was elongated, covered with numerous small, round objects that resembled insect eggs. While the body was green, the eggs were yellow.
Here's a question: what do you think this is?
"...Marquess, Your Excellency."
"What is it, Brother Undertaker?"
"This looks like... rice."
That's right. The "strange and wicked thing" was none other than rice. The original form of the rice that no Korean could fail to recognize.
The Sword Marquess sighed heavily at my remark. "Haah, what a pity. Even someone like you couldn't identify it immediately."
He was spouting nonsense.
"I apologize. My vision is still lacking... What is this thing that looks like rice?"
"It's opium," he announced.
"What?"
"It's opium. Haven't you heard of it? It's a wicked substance that causes immense harm if inhaled!"
Of course I knew what opium was. When you cut the poppy fruit, a sap oozes out, which can then be refined into opium. It has pain-relieving properties and was secretly grown by old folks in rural areas. There's even a legend that ancient Koreans, who were known to turn everything into a side dish, once had a poppy salad.
The problem was, no matter how I looked at it, the plant in front of me was rice.
"So, Your Excellency is saying that this thing, which looks like rice, has the same effect on humans as smoking opium?"
"Exactly! Ah," the Sword Marquess added nonchalantly, "but it doesn't have the addictive properties of opium."
"Hold on a minute." I reflexively grabbed the Sword Marquess's shoulder.
He looked at me in question. "What's wrong?"
"You said it's not addictive? You're saying this rice-opium isn't addictive at all?"
"Yes."
"Your Excellency. If this is truly a plant similar to opium, containing some narcotic substance, consuming it would make people feel very good, correct?"
"Hmm, correct."
"But the fundamental problem with all narcotics is their addictive nature that leads to dependency. The more you consume, the more you want. Tolerance builds, and eventually, the brain cannot feel any happiness without the drug. Let's call all these side effects 'addictive properties' for convenience."
"Suit yourself."
"I'll ask again. This rice-opium has absolutely no 'addictive properties'?"
"Haah, that's what I said, isn't it?"
"..."
In an instant, equations began to form in my mind.
Narcotic - addictive properties - all side effects = ?
"Wait! Then it's not a narcotic at all!" I declared.
"Huh?" The Sword Marquess tilted his head. "What a strange reaction. Did I ever call it a narcotic? I said it was opium. Opium, the plant those treacherous Europeans brought to ravage China..."
"Please cultivate it! This thing!" I grabbed the Sword Marquess's other shoulder too, grasping both with my hands. "Go to Gimhae Plain and, while doing the delayed farming work, please cultivate this rice-opium or whatever it is!"
"What nonsense." The Sword Marquess snorted, "Hah! You should burn and destroy this root of all evil immediately, but I showed it to you out of respect. Now you want me to grow it? Impossible! I will never, under any circumstances, cultivate it!"
"We will spread it to the European imperialists and settle our old grudges."
"I will cultivate it immediately, Brother."
A fortnight went and passed, and with unprecedented enthusiasm, the Sword Marquess threw himself into farming, and the rice-opium (ZERO addictive properties) grew rapidly. We then immediately commenced testing.
"Why did you call me, guild leader?"
"Just in case the Sword Marquess was lying about the lack of side effects, I need you to monitor it, Ah-ryeon."
"Eh... I'm really busy these days. I came because you asked, guild leader..."
"Yes, thank you."
I largely ignored Sim Ah-ryeon's words. Ever since she became the Saintess of the North, she liked to flaunt her busy status.
Regardless, various people gathered in the experimental area. Among them was Noh Do-hwa, who had just risen from her sickbed.
"Is it really possible to have opium without side effects? Opium induces pleasure by fundamentally damaging the brain..."
"I don't know. According to the Sword Marquess, it's a plant found in the Void. Anything can happen there, so a side-effect-free drug might exist."
"It sounds like bullshit..."
I agreed.
But if it wasn't? Then we would need to revise the term "narcotic." It would just be a drug. Possibly even a panacea.
"Alright, everyone, please pay attention."
Everyone in the experimental area turned to look at me.
"First, we'll test on five prisoners infected with the 'Murder Addiction Syndrome' anomaly. We will test the efficacy of rice-opium in solid, liquid, and gaseous forms."
"..."
"We will conduct the tests in 1-year, 3-year, 10-year, 20-year, and 50-year intervals to monitor for long-term side effects. Yes, Student Sim Ah-ryeon, why did you raise your hand?"
"Guild leader. Can I try it too...?"
"No, you cannot. Begin the test."
The prisoners were isolated individually. Each was placed in a dark, enclosed room where they could see nothing but darkness, and they were given bundles of rice-opium.
- Let me out!
- I'm sorry! I'll never kill innocent people again! Please forgive me!
Bang, bang.
A faint sound of banging on the walls could be heard, barely noticeable to the average ear. In front of each of the five rooms was a red button.
[Press to fast-forward time by one year.]
Pressing the red button would advance time by a year inside the rooms. Press it twice, and two years would pass. Press it two hundred times, and two hundred years would pass. In theory, billions of years could pass.
Of course, the rooms and the buttons were one whole anomaly. Inside these rooms, people could survive without eating or drinking. However, they couldn't sleep, and without someone outside opening the door, they couldn't escape.
It was the perfect prison, one of the frequently used anomalies by the National Road Management Corps. With these rooms, we could sentence criminals to 1,000 years and literally keep them imprisoned for 1,000 years.
Since this prison was introduced, the crime rate plummeted. A prison sentence could be scarier than a death sentence.
"Director Noh Do-hwa, please commence the 1-year sentence."
"Alright..."
Noh Do-hwa pressed the button in front of Room 1. The sound of banging on the walls sped up, becoming a rapid bang, bang, banging, which then quickly fell silent in less than 0.01 seconds.
"One second has passed," she declared. "Should we release them?"
"Yes, please."
The National Road Management Corps members approached and opened the door of Room 1.
Usually, prisoners were broken mentally after serving their 'sentences.' It was only natural. No one could remain sane after being locked in a dark room for periods ranging from two months to 150,000 years (an actual sentence received by a criminal). Prisoners would typically drool, mumble incoherently, or be completely unresponsive, like a corpse.
This time, however, was different.
"Huh?"
The prisoner from Room 1 looked completely fine. He was munching on the preserved rice-opium grains.
"Has it already been a year?" he asked.
"..."
"Wow, a good thing too. I was so bored, I thought I'd die. Haha, I'm free now, right? I'll never commit another crime!"
The prisoner from Room 1 smiled broadly. He showed no signs of mental illness or Void poisoning. He looked perfectly healthy.
"Hmm..."
"Hmm."
Noh Do-hwa and I exchanged glances.
We immediately moved on to the next test. Noh Do-hwa pressed the red button three times, ten times, twenty times, and fifty times for the remaining rooms.
The results:
"Finally free!"
"Thank you, Lord! Thank you so much!"
"I will live a righteous life from now on!"
Amazingly, all the prisoners who served their sentences emerged with "good mental and physical health." Despite a thorough examination by Sim Ah-ryeon, no side effects were found.
The prisoners had endured their solitary confinement by experiencing happiness from consuming the rice-opium.
"Regressor Undertaker, this is..."
"Yes." I nodded at Noh Do-hwa. "Let's cultivate this on a large scale immediately."
"..."
"From now on, this new plant will no longer be called the insidious name 'rice-opium.' It will be known as 'dopamine.'"
I was invincible.
The Sword Marquess was a god.
Dopamine was the key.
Footnotes:
[1] A battle of the Three Kingdoms period in which several great generals and minds of war were killed.
-x-X-x-
The Addict II
Dofarming—a newly coined term short for "dopamine farming."
In the past, when civilization still thrived, it referred to internet ghosts seeking sensational videos or news, but even as the world collapsed, history advanced. In this apocalyptic era, we finally achieved true "dofarming."
"I'm... so happy...!"
Sim Ah-ryeon shivered with joy.
"What... what is this happiness? I just ate a bowl of rice. I just consumed a carbohydrate-laden meal! But this happiness! This overwhelming happiness is enveloping me! Guild Master! What is this?"
"It's a new rice variety called dopamine that will sustain the Korean Peninsula."
"It's so delicious! I feel like screaming in happiness, even if what I eat is plain white rice three times a day! I've been missing out on life... Do ordinary people live with this kind of happiness every day...? Without a hint of depression?"
"No. Most people probably didn't experience this level of happiness..."
Who could have predicted?
The Fourth Industrial Revolution, following the first three, was not the AI or robotics revolution, but the Agricultural Revolution. Now, every plot of land capable of farming in Korea produced dopamine. To an outsider, it looked like ordinary rice fields; they might even mistake the country for a scene from the old Joseon era.
"My stomach is full and happiness follows... This is insane. This crop is insane, Guild Master..."
And it didn't even require the richest of soils. In fact, it required much less attention than growing actual rice. With just some fertilizer and diligent planting, dopamine replicated effortlessly.
Naturally, the atmosphere on SG Net also changed drastically.
- Anonymous: Confession: I used to post malicious comments anonymously.
- Anonymous: But after a month of eating dopamine, I started to wonder why I lived like that. Finding faults in others never improved my life...
- Anonymous: I especially want to apologize to WitchJudge. I was the one who kept calling you a train-enthusiast auntie.
- Anonymous: I used to criticize you, saying that a representative Awakener of the Korean Peninsula should maintain their dignity, but I was just projecting my own unhappiness onto you.
- Anonymous: I regret my past. Will you forgive me, Witch Judge?
└[Samcheon] WitchJudge: Of course, I forgive you^^ But which city do you live in?
Even this kind of change was trivial compared to what was to come for the truly earth-shattering upheaval was to come shortly thereafter.
- OldManGoryeo: I am retiring from SG Net.
Sim Ah-ryeon announced she was quitting SG Net!
- OldManGoryeo: Busy with real life.
Sim Ah-ryeon used the term "real life"!
- OldManGoryeo: If I've hurt anyone while I was active, I apologize here. I'm sorry.
Sim Ah-ryeon apologized!
Not once in 671 cycles, not since the invention of SG Net and Sim Ah-ryeon's survival, had she ever abandoned her identity as the villain OldManGoryeo. And now, she was turning her back on the internet? Focusing solely on living as the Saintess of the North in Pyongyang? Was this even possible?
"Ah-ryeon, are you... serious?"
"Yes? Yes. Honestly, living my daily life while eating dopamine makes me much happier than posting nonsense on SG Net..."
Of course, despite saying this, the villainous OldManGoryeo returned to SG Net a week later. She left me with the memorable line: "Guild leader, I realized you can't live on happiness alone (smile)." But on the flip side, it meant she voluntarily quit SG Net for a whole week.
"Is it really that astounding of a thing...?"
"Director Noh Do-hwa, live as long as I have. The sun has risen in the west many times, but Ah-ryeon has never done anything like this."
"Being more astonished by an internet troll than celestial movements. Truly the life of a regressor..."
"By the way, Director, aren't you eating dopamine?"
"No," Noh Do-hwa responded indifferently, sipping the awful coffee I made while flipping through documents. "No matter how much it passes 50-year side effect tests, why would I consume such a suspicious void plant? I'm not looking to become a test subject..."
"But it's like a drug with zero side effects. It makes you incredibly happy. The statistics show that satisfaction with life is much higher now than when civilization was intact."
"Oh. Happiness. Sweet resonance..." Noh Do-hwa sneered. "I lived without it and will continue to do so. Sure, thanks to dopamine, crime and complaints have plummeted and labor productivity has soared, reducing my workload as a director. But..."
"Hmm."
"Regressor Undertaker. Do you think I don't know your ulterior motives? You just want to see me basking in happiness..."
"You're mistaken." How did she know? Did Noh Do-hwa develop mind-reading abilities too? Scary.
"By the way," Noh Do-hwa continued, "the Magical Girl Association requested some dopamine seeds. In exchange, they'll expand farmland in Kyushu..."
"Is there a need to hesitate? Share them. In these tough times, good things should be shared."
"Heh." Noh Do-hwa's eyes twinkled behind her monocle. "You're not just trying to test if this miracle crop has any side effects, right? Regressor Undertaker, are you also abstaining from dopamine...?"
I remained silent on that.
It was half true.
All human civilizations ultimately strive to achieve happiness.
The minimum condition for happiness is avoiding misery, or in other words, not having one's rights infringed upon. The larger the society, the more its happiness trends towards an average. Thus, the laws of a sufficiently large society always focus on the minimum condition for happiness, preventing rights violations. The rest of its citizens' happiness must be sought individually, drawing a clear line between 'society's happiness' from 'personal happiness.'
Achieving the vast numbers of both social and individual happiness simultaneously is humanity's ultimate goal.
'Dopamine might be the tool that finally brings human civilization to its peak.'
It might sound absurd, but I seriously considered this possibility.
For many people, life was a struggle. Providing them with a crop that had awakening effects, fatigue recovery, productivity boosts, and hunger reduction with zero side effects could change everything. Life might no longer be suffering but, rather, a stroke of luck.
As a regressor who had lived eons, I had to consider the world beyond the eradication of anomalies.
'If dopamine really has no side effects, the Sword Marquess will be humanity's eternal savior.'
As you might guess from listening to my story, the miracle crop that brought "happiness" to everyone didn't end with a "happy ending."
"Undertaker."
A year later, Dang Seo-rin came to me with news.
"Not a single child was born in Busan this year."
News of Korea's record-low birthrate—breaking the just-recently-apocalypse-minted record—wasn't surprising to anyone. However, there had never been a time when the birthrate was literally 0%. Not even during the apocalypse when anomalies took over the world.
Dang Seo-rin said that this record was set in Busan.
"...Not even one?"
"None."
Dang Seo-rin's tone was calm. It was a defense mechanism. The more serious the situation, the colder her voice became.
When she faltered, the entire organization could collapse. This was her characteristic.
"I didn't believe it, so I had it checked several times," she stated evenly. "Considering the number of residents in Busan, it seemed impossible that no newborns were registered. Perhaps they were born outside hospitals or clinics?"
"..."
"But it was confirmed. This year, not a single human was born."
To Dang Seo-rin, I was the only person with whom she could briefly drop her cold facade.
After a moment of silence, she spoke again, overlaying objective truth with her personal sincerity.
"All the babies were stillborn."
According to her investigation, this phenomenon occurred universally around the 8th week of pregnancy. The fetuses would simply stop growing. Their bodies would curl up and shrink, as if they wanted to leave no trace in this world.
As if every pregnancy were merely an "illusion."
"..."
"..."
I remained silent as the verbal report and written documents were delivered.
Both Dang Seo-rin and I already had a suspicion. We both understood the source of this bizarre phenomenon. We also shared the unspoken understanding that this wasn't just a problem confined to Busan.
"Of course, it could just be a strange occurrence limited to Busan."
But it wasn't.
A week later, Cheon Yo-hwa came to Busan with similar news.
"Teacher, babies are dying."
"..."
"No, it's more accurate to say they're disappearing. They just vanish. Continuously."
Reports from Busan, Sejong, Pyongyang, Daejeon, southern Seoul, and even the Japanese archipelago all told the same story from every city and village where humans clung to life.
No babies were being born.
No new humans visited the earth anymore.
"..."
"..."
The meeting room of the Regressor Alliance fell into an eerie silence.
Lee Ha-yul, the youngest among us who had knocked on the world's door most recently, muttered softly, "...Maybe it's just for this year?"
But it wasn't.
The same reports came in the following year.
"Busan's birth rate is zero."
"Ugh. Not a single baby was born in Sejong either."
"P-Pyongyang too... None..."
It was a strange phenomenon. There were no unhappy people anymore. Except for the few, like Noh Do-hwa, who deliberately avoided dopamine, everyone was happy.
Human civilization had reached its pinnacle. And at this peak, humanity suddenly exercised a veto on the cycle of life.
Why?
The phenomenon of 'not having children because life is unhappy' had been observed, but the exact opposite, 'no births despite an extremely happy life,' was unprecedented.
However, the cause was clear.
"There's one thing we can try."
Everyone in the meeting room turned to look at me.
"This is definitely the work of an anomaly. Something related to dopamine is causing these unborn babies to experience something dreadful."
Cheon Yo-hwa tilted her head. "But teacher, we've observed the fetuses through various means, and they really started to shrink suddenly at the 8-week mark for no apparent reason."
"Yes. That's what it looked like from the outside. But it means the anomaly is affecting the inside of the fetus."
"The inside of the fetus...? What does that mean?"
"Dreams."
I glanced at one corner of the meeting room. There, Fairy No. 264 was playing with LEGO bricks.
I looked at the anomaly, known as the Baku, and spoke.
"I will personally enter the dreams of newborns to find out which anomaly is kidnapping our future."
-x-X-x-
The Addict III
A birth rate of 0%.
Faced with an unprecedented situation, one that even survivors from South Korea had never witnessed before, the policy I proposed was simple.
- Use the Baku to enter the fetus's dream.
- Exterminate the mysterious monster lurking there.
I prided myself on this being the most practical low birth rate policy ever proposed on the Korean Peninsula, yet even this faced issues right from the first stage.
First, Fairy No. 264, our emergency-appointment low birth rate advisor, expressed her reluctance.
"Hieeek. Comrade Secretary, having a fully grown adult, especially a total stranger, enter a fetus's dream is an incredibly reckless act!"
"...Is it that difficult?"
"Hoeee, of course it is!"
Fairy No. 264, chosen as an expert for the advisory committee, had a look that said, "How can someone not know something so basic?"
"The fetal world is made up only of 'sounds'! The dual melodies of the mother's high-pitched tones and the father's low-pitched tones, the rhythm of the heartbeat, the dissonance of the digestive organs... And the mysterious interplay of light and shadow! Although it's really just the parents turning the room lights on and off, to the fetus, it's as if the sun and moon are taking turns in a twilight dance. The touch of water. Smells. The fetus's world, the fetus's dream is made up of only these things!"
"There's almost no visual information."
"Yes! That's a big problem!" The revolutionary cadre nodded, speaking the language of the Americans. It suited the situation. "The fetal world consists of 80%— no, more than 90% sound! In contrast, for a fully grown human like you, Comrade Secretary, vision accounts for more than 80% of your sensory importance! This is a difference so significant it could be said you're almost different species!"
"But it's a task that must be accomplished. Isn't there any way?"
"If you want your form to disintegrate into the soundscape of a three-four time beat as soon as you enter the dream, I won't stop you."
"Hmm..."
As I was contemplating, Fairy No. 264 added, "Hoeee, but if it's someone with a voice familiar to the baby, the success rate jumps dramatically. About 3% to 9%?"
"A voice familiar to the baby?"
"If it's the mother or father, it's much easier to access the baby's dream! So if it's your own child, Comrade Secretary, the success rate doubles!"
Ping!
At that moment, the atmosphere in the conference room changed.
I could sense the shift in the air. Everyone in the meeting was now keenly listening to this conversation.
...I had once promised Oh Dok-seo that I wouldn't use [Mind Reading] again, but this time, it was hard to resist.
[Cheon Yo-hwa: Wow. That incubus asked the forbidden question everyone was curious about but no one dared to ask...]
[Seo Gyu: I am curious. Hyung is a regressor who has lived through hundreds of cycles, but has he really never had children? Never been married?]
[Dang Seo-rin: I should focus on the taste of this coffee. Yes, it's delicious.]
[Sword Marquess: Mount Hua numba won.]
[Sim Ah-ryeon: The guild leader's baby must be so cute.]
[Noh Do-hwa: Oh, he closed his eye? That bastard is using Mind Reading, isn't he...?]
I immediately turned off Mind Reading and rubbed my left eye as if I were wiping away some dust. Even though Noh Do-hwa was still looking at me suspiciously, I nonchalantly changed the subject.
"Having a child solely for the purpose of eliminating a monster would be disrespectful to the child. Instead, how about this method?"
"Hoeee, what do you mean?"
"Instead of me entering the fetus's dream, we invite the fetus into my dream. Wouldn't that be better?"
The fairy jumped in her seat. "Hoek! As expected of Comrade Secretary! That's indeed a brilliant decision! The success rate would then soar to over 50%!"
Soft sounds of disappointment and irritation echoed quietly around the conference room.
I was a bit tired of it. It seemed that human interest in others' romantic affairs was truly instinctual.
"Alright," I pressed forward. "Instead of just suddenly inviting the fetus into my dream, let's decorate my dream to match the fetal environment as closely as possible. As you said, we'll keep the surroundings dark, have the smell of water, and add natural white noise."
"Success rate over 90%! Comrade Secretary, you're a genius...!"
The project outline was set.
Now, we just needed a collaborator, specifically a pregnant mother. This part was resolved quickly.
"Are you saying that some damn monster is trying to kidnap my baby? Of course I'll help. Just chew that bastard's limbs to pieces."
"Yes, Undertaker! Dismember that thing completely!"
"..."
Survivors of the apocalypse were fundamentally tough. Among them, the Busan citizens who watched Dang Seo-rin's monster dissection show every week were particularly resilient.
We had a total of 49 volunteers.
The choice came down to sounding out the person who had been pregnant the longest. This was done at the fairy's request.
"Hoeee, the fetus's brain needs to be developed enough to dream!"
It was a valid point. These days, fetuses stopped developing at 8 weeks, and disappeared completely between 10 to 30 weeks.
The final candidate was at 25 weeks, yet by all appearances, there were no noticeable differences to before her pregnancy, and her belly wasn't protruding at all. It wouldn't have been surprising if the baby had been kidnapped already, and the mother's anger and anxiety towards the monster were just as urgent.
There was another reason behind choosing her.
"If my baby is born, I plan to name her Seo-ah."
I wonder if you remember. In a very old, bygone cycle, there was a little apprentice chef who personally fed me sugar donuts on Haeundae Beach. In each cycle, Jeong Seo-ah's personality and appearance were slightly different. Even the gender varied. But their identity as a bakery kid remained the same.
Yes. I know that this 'Jeong Seo-ah' and the 'Jeong Seo-ah' to be born in this cycle will be similar yet different. But what does it matter? Every child carves out their own life in the gap between an adult's knowledge and the unknown.
I didn't want to see this child being kidnapped by a monster.
"Now, sit side by side! We need to sing a lullaby to properly enter the dream!"
The preparations were complete.
Thirty-six fairies formed a circle and held hands. I held the fairy's hand with my right hand, and the mother's with my left.
Then the fairies began to sing in unison.
Mom is going to the island shade ♪
To pick some necks ♪
The baby is left alone— to poop ♪
"..."
Were you still going to insist that this nonsensical song was a lullaby?
Just as my sense of disbelief disappeared, my consciousness suddenly sank to the floor.
We had already agreed not to descend into too deep of an unconscious state.
As everyone knows, the basement is now the territory of 'She-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named.'
To put it simply, the 'pink entity's' unconscious world was at the 13th underground level. This time, the unconscious level I descended to was at most the 2nd underground level.
- Thump.
Even that level, however, was enough to decorate the interior by mimicking the fetal senses.
- Thump. Thump. Thump.
There was only darkness.
But it was not a silent darkness, nor was it a dry, black background. The darkness was sound.
The world was quietly growling.
To humans, the heart was never just a visual diagram but a sound, echoing softly like a wave in water.
"I can't see anything."
"Well, the baby has never seen anything, so it's natural! To a baby, seeing the world with eyes closed is everything there is to see."
"No wonder prophets in myths are depicted as blind. To experience the primordial world, you must discern through sound."
"Shh. The baby is here!"
Holding my left hand, the fairy pointed to a part of the darkness.
I saw it.
- ...
My senses reinterpreted the 'world the baby was experiencing' as visual information. And it was astonishing.
"That's... just water?"
Water was floating and wriggling in the middle of the darkness.
There were no visible limbs. No head. There was something long and tentacle-like squirming in the water... Was it the umbilical cord?
No matter how you looked at it, it was more like an Undine wannabe than a human.
"Yes. It's water?"
"...No. Where's the calmly curled-up baby, and why is there a water elemental slime instead?"
"Tsk, tsk, tsk. Comrade Secretary, that's an adult's perspective."
This brat was really asking for a flick on the forehead.
"Adults separate the fetus and amniotic fluid, thinking this is human and that is liquid, but from the fetus's perspective, the amniotic fluid is just another part of its body! It's been with them since birth, so it's only natural!"
"Ah."
"Human scholars interpret the pain babies experience during birth as merely the separation of the umbilical cord, the separation from the mother. But fundamentally, it's closer to the loss of 'water,' thus losing a part of their most basic 'skin.' Mammals, in essence, are terrifying creatures that have their skin peeled off completely when they are born..."
The fairy shivered.
'Quite an interesting perspective.'
So, a significant part of the pain humans experience at birth is due to the 'loss of water,' or the 'loss of their body.' In other words, babies who were originally 'water spirits' are forcibly turned into 'humans.'
There was no time to dwell on this anthropological notion now, though
"Comrade Secretary! The monster is appearing!"
The culprit behind the zero birth rate era on the Korean Peninsula had appeared.
Step, step—
The monster walked gracefully from the other side of the darkness. When I saw the monster's form, my eyes widened in shock.
Jeong Seo-ah.
A monster, eerily resembling the grown-up version of the fetus Jeong Seo-ah would eventually become, was approaching the fetus.
- Sigh. Yesterday was hard too.
Plop.
The 'grown-up Jeong Seo-ah' sat down beside the 'unborn Jeong Seo-ah.'
- You know, mommy seems to have finally heard the news. That if things continue like this, I might never be born.
- ...
The monster, mimicking Jeong Seo-ah's appearance, whispered to the fetus in a bizarre voice and tone.
- Our daddy died last month while out in the Void, didn't he? So mommy thinks I'm the only trace daddy left behind. But now, knowing I might disappear too, it's causing her immense pain. She overdosed on dopamine again.
- ...
- It's not just mommy. Daddy was baking dopamine rice pizza every day until the day before he disappeared. Uncle too. Auntie too. Great-uncle and great-auntie also need to be counted. Thanks to that damn dopamine, they lived healthily and happily until their deaths.
- ...
- So... now it's my turn?
Splash.
The monster that looked like Jeong Seo-ah dipped her hand into the amniotic fluid.
Then, an ominous 'black color' that was different from the serene darkness of this dream world began to taint the fetus's amniotic fluid.
- ...! ...!
The amniotic fluid turned pitch black.
Unable to scream, the fetus—the being of water—could only express its agony by violently disturbing the surface.
'Ah.'
At that moment, I understood the true nature of dopamine. How it managed to keep making people happy without any side effects up until now.
The side effects hadn't disappeared. Misfortune hadn't vanished. The side effects and misfortune were simply transferred and postponed onto 'someone else.'
Namely, the unborn children.
In other words, they went to the 'next generation' that shared the same bloodline.
Footnotes:
[1] Gung Ye was a historical figure who lost one eye as a baby and grew up to be a king of the Later Three Kingdoms period of Korea. He also claimed to have the mysterious power of mind-reading, which he used to have his political advisors and adversaries executed.
-x-X-x-
The Addict IV
- Is it painful?
The anomaly spoke to the fetus.
- Do you still want to be born despite this?
Its voice sounded strangely kind.
That alone was peculiar. Originally, all gestures of anomalies were merely awkward imitations. Nevertheless, this anomaly managed to pretend to be human quite skillfully. It mimicked the appearance of a human, adopted their voice, and imitated their movements.
- The outside world is full of lives like this.
Splash.
The anomaly unhesitatingly thrust its forearm into the amniotic fluid and stirred it.
- ...!
Then, the water forming the fetus flickered with various colors.
The surface of the water acted like a television screen, and across it were images, flowing as if a movie film were being projected.
Scenes of Jeong Seo-Ah's mother in agony, of her father, stressed out from running a bakery. Of uncles, aunts, distant relatives, grand-uncles, and grandmothers. The scenes of the 'bloodline' of those connected to the small fetus Jeong Seo-Ah suffering were being broadcast.
"Hieeek. These are not ordinary images," Fairy No. 264 whispered softly beside me. "Those are undoubtedly the unhappiness and pain they would have felt when they didn't take dopamine...! Each color contains dense emotions...!"
Life, aging, illness, death.
Things that were originally erased by dopamine in the real world, from the most trivial misfortunes of humans to the most dreadful ones, were all transferred to the fetus.
After completing the transfer, the anomaly shuddered with a sigh.
- Jeong Seo-Ah.
- ...
- Even after this, do you still want to be born into this world?
Thump.
The heartbeat that supported the fetus's dream weakened. The rhythm slackened and the sound diminished.
Yet still, the heartbeat continued. The will to live, which had lasted for 25 weeks, had not been abandoned by Jeong Seo-Ah.
However, the anomaly's words were not yet finished.
- Of course, there is a way to avoid such suffering.
The anomaly caressed Jeong Seo-Ah.
- You can take dopamine too.
The fetus's body jolted violently.
- Then you can pretend there is no such thing as the prevalent misery and pain in the world. Just like your mother. Like your father. Like everyone else living in this world right now.
- ...
- Why should you have to bear the crushing blow? It's not your fault the world is like this. You were just born. You can just pass it on.
Once more.
- But if you do that, you'll be the first generation to do so knowing the truth of it all.
Drip, drop.
The water that formed the fetus's body also started to diminish.
Like old skin shedding, droplets fell from the surface of the amniotic fluid. They were tears. A fetus, yet to develop limbs and features, knew no other way to cry.
We deduced outside that "the size of the fetus gradually diminishes until it disappears." The truth of it, however, was different. The child made of water was simply disappearing by shedding tears.
- Yes. You made a wise decision.
The anomaly touched its tongue to the droplets that fell from the fetus. Then it lapped up the water like a hamster in a cage.
- You don't need to bear it. There's no reason to endure unhappiness yourself or pass on sins knowingly. So...? Right?
The anomaly that was drinking the amniotic fluid tilted its head.
- This isn't a dream.
At that moment, the anomaly's right arm was cut off. A strike from my sword cleanly sliced away its forearm.
- Ah.
Thud.
The severed forearm turned into water in mid air and spilled onto the ground. Only then did the anomaly, mimicking Jeong Seo-Ah's face, glance to the side at me.
Fairy No. 264 chose that moment to flee with a gasp. Really, it was useless in combat.
- ...!
However, without a glance at the fairy, surprise spread across the anomaly's face. It looked as if it recognized me, a reaction that seemed genuinely human.
- Undertaker?
"Do you know of my existence?"
- If even the old-timers here don't know, it's time to close shop.
"You speak well for an anomaly. Your tongue flows like an eloquent scholar's, as if you possess intelligence."
- Ahaha.
The anomaly laughed. Its laughter was exceptionally realistic. The voice echoed through the dream's darkness like that of a truly innocent child.
- Because I am human! Of course, I possess intelligence!
"Is that so? You're not an anomaly but a human?"
- Yes, yes. Because we...
The anomaly spread its arms. The arm I had severed had already regenerated.
- We feel pain and unhappiness.
Like the Pietà, the anomaly cradled the fetus.[1]
- Obviously, we are more human than those fake ones outside who no longer feel pain, unhappiness, or responsibility, and don't want to feel it.
I opened my mouth and then closed it. The logic structure alone was genuinely human.
- Only those who are more unhappy, who suffer more, are cherished as human beings by you, aren't they?
More miserable families, more pitiful environments. Scarier teachers, harsher companies, more tyrannical nations.
Humans loved to compete over the depth of their unhappiness—something only humans could do, could be capable of.
- You have lost the qualification to be human.
In this era filled with dopamine, it was what humans had lost.
- Now, we will become the new humans of this era.
I chose that moment to look at Jeong Seo-Ah in the anomaly's arms and say, "In a world where no one is born?"
- Dream. Reality. The only difference is the layer.
Indeed. So the new human race would unfold within dreams.
At that moment, I thought I knew where the unborn children were headed.
However...
"You're wrong."
I raised my sword as I spoke.
"Not everyone is taking dopamine," I argued. "Therefore, you cannot strip humanity of its qualifications."
The anomaly furrowed its brow, as if considering it a wordplay.
- That's because of the Sword Marquess's fields, the logistics network doesn't apply to the whole of humanity. But surely you know, as a self-proclaimed anomaly expert? Talking about 'reality' with us is meaningless—
"Noh Do-hwa."
The anomaly flinched.
"She doesn't take dopamine," I said. "Before they even knew there were side effects like you, she refused to take dopamine."
- ...
"If you know my name, you must also know about Noh Do-hwa, and that she doesn't take dopamine. Am I wrong?"
The silent anomaly soon ground its teeth.
- ...That woman is an oddball. An outlier. She can't represent humanity.
"In a sense, I agree."
I swung my sword again. Once more, the anomaly's arm flew off.
"But as for the latter half, I do not. She alone can represent humanity."
This time, the severed arm did not regenerate. The anomaly's argument crumbled before the evidence of Noh Do-hwa.
- Urgh!
The anomaly stepped back as if trying to flee somewhere, but this was my dream. Entering might have been easy, but leaving wouldn't come free.
Swish!
I immediately slashed my sword, cutting off one of the anomaly's legs. The anomaly fell backward in its attempted escape as I simultaneously grabbed Jeong Seo-Ah.
The anomaly looked up at me.
- N-no...
The anomaly trembled.
- Please don't kill me. I don't want to die...
I had cut down countless anomalies, and even cut down humans. Those with mouths, tongues, and vocal cords often begged for their lives before my blade.
I did not listen to them.
I had lived long enough to know that merely being born and looking human did not make one human. Let alone an anomaly that only imitated humans.
Yet.
"Why?" I found myself asking, abruptly realizing something. "Didn't you tell Jeong Seo-Ah the same thing? That the world is full of pain and misery, with bombs passed down from above. So why beg for your life?"
- That's...
The anomaly's words trailed off.
The once fluent arguments ceased. The tongue was still. The expression vanished.
But the eyes.
The anomaly's eyes were fixed on Jeong Seo-Ah in my arms. I noticed a sort of envy, perhaps even longing, in that gaze.
"..."
Right.
If this anomaly had continued to speak eloquently as it had before, I would have swung my sword without hesitation. It didn't. A being that longed for life, despite bearing and chewing through pain and suffering, refusing to escape through death—such a being, I couldn't easily cut down. Especially not when a certain old man did it so easily.
However, I knew what I had to do. I also knew how to do it.
This emotion would subside. My hand would advance. The anomaly would be exterminated.
In ten seconds, I knew it would be done.
But.
But still.
"I have something to ask."
I lowered my sword.
- What...?
"If you claim to be human, you should answer this."
Jingle.
A bell rang in the dark space. The sound came from the bracelet on my wrist.
A 'Silver Bell' hung there.
I held the namesake of my alias 'Undertaker' up to the anomaly and asked, "Do you want to escape from hell?"
Originally, Time Seal only worked on humans.
The reason was simple. The other party had to agree to the use of the ability by saying, "Yes, please use that ability on me!" It was a contract of sorts, and as such, using Time Seal on non-human species was almost impossible.
Most anomalies merely imitated human thinking and language. They did not truly understand. They couldn't sign a contract of consent.
But.
"Do you want to be at peace forever?"
- ...
"I can make you relive the happiest day of your life forever. If you've lamented about bearing the misfortune of many people, you can imagine how sweet this offer is."
If there truly was an anomaly that thought of itself as human...
If that anomaly, through some process, somehow really understood human thinking and language...
"In return, you will be forgotten by all humans. No one will remember that you ever existed."
- ...
"Except for me."
If such an anomaly existed...
It could naturally be sealed in the tombstone of time.
- Ah.
The anomaly murmured.
- No matter how happy the dream, if you argue it's just an illusion...
"You said dreams and reality are no different, so you contradict yourself."
- Indeed. It's a checkmate.
The anomaly murmured.
- So that's it. If I say no here, I give up being human. If I agree, I get exterminated.
The anomaly looked at me, it gaze quiet.
- What a cruel human you are.
"I asked a question."
- Truly cruel.
When a human ended their own life, it was called suicide. Then what should it be called when an anomaly voluntarily got exterminated? Should it not also be called suicide?
- ...I've only dreamt of a miserable life.
The anomaly's gaze turned to the sky.
- Though I spoke of pain as the human condition, I never wanted to be miserable. I wanted to live happily, like the humans outside.
That skyward gaze lowered to peer at Jeong Seo-ah in my arms, then downward still to see itself in the form of Jeong Seo-ah all grown up.
- Now, I want to live a happy dream. I am human.
I nodded silently.
Jingle.
The moment the Silver Bell rang for the last time, the anomaly in Jeong Seo-ah's form burst apart. Its body turned into a black liquid that spilled onto the floor. On the wet floor stood a transparent crystal tombstone.
Indeed. I was the first to witness an anomaly die by suicide.
There is an epilogue.
"Dopamine? What's that?"
Once the anomaly was subjected to Time Seal, people naturally forgot all about dopamine. It wasn't just their memories that were lost either.
"Dang Seo-rin, don't you see the rice covering that plain?"
"Huh? What are you talking about? It's just a wasteland."
"..."
People couldn't perceive dopamine at all. Even if opium rice grew right before their eyes, even if the grains were refined and presented, they only saw empty air.
For the past two years, the fact that no newborns were born was considered a 'very strange event.' Nobody remembered it was chaos caused by dopamine. Not even the Saintess or the Sword Marquess.
"What do you think, Ah-ryeon? Do you feel a sudden burst of happiness or anything?"
"N-not at all. I feel the same as usual."
More surprisingly, forcing dopamine on others had no effect. The crop that was once expected to save human civilization, something everyone carried and consumed, had been forgotten. Now, I was the only person left who knew about dopamine.
"Hmm."
The event of the Sword Marquess discovering and bringing dopamine wouldn't even happen in the next cycle.
I felt a bit bitter and, while giving Noh Do-hwa a ride, asked this question.
"Captain Noh Do-hwa. Suppose there's a food that supposedly makes you happy without any side effects."
"Hot, fried chicken, you mean...?"
"Whatever... Would you eat it?"
Noh Do-hwa adjusted her glasses. The dangling chain jingled hysterically. "Why are you asking something so ridiculous...? Would others eat it too...?"
"Yes."
"Hmm..."
She was on her second night of staying up. Pressing down on the dark circles under her eyes, she said, "If it were just my portion, I'd eat it all up... But if everyone eats it, I probably wouldn't...?"
"Why not? Everyone else is eating it."
"Hmm... I guess because I'm a hipster who gets upset if my unique thing becomes mainstream?"
I nodded immediately. "Indeed." It was a very convincing reason.
That was why I couldn't understand what happened next.
"No, Captain. Why are you suddenly hitting me on the head?"
"Just because it annoyed me that you actually agreed with my nonsense..." she grumbled.
"It was nonsense?"
"What else could it be? Damn, how do you see me...?"
Noh Do-hwa shook her head and put down her teacup, her tone turning more serious. "If everyone takes that mysterious happiness pill, someone has to avoid it to prepare for contingencies."
Hmm.
Given that was the very reason I was able to corner the anomaly, I had nothing to say. Even so, I had to ask, "For an uncertain preventive measure, you'd give up certain happiness?"
"What are you saying, damn... Since you came to me, my life has been summarized by that sentence... Do you seriously not realize that?"
"Certainly."
I resolved to give Noh Do-hwa more rides in the future.
A second epilogue.
One day, after cleaning up the remnants in the lowest layer of the dream within a dream, I found myself on the second floor of the dream. That floor changed its scenery every time I dreamed, but one thing always remained constant: there was a crystal tombstone in a corner of the landscape.
'Now I even have graves in my dreams.'
I touched the tombstone as a test. Usually, when I fiddled with the surface of the tombstone, the 'happiest day' of the human sealed inside would unfold like virtual reality. So now, the happiest moment of the dopamine anomaly should be reproduced―
Something quite surprising happened instead.
"Do you want to escape from hell?"
- ...
"Do you want to be at peace forever?"
In the anomaly's dream, the scene of our confrontation was repeating.
I blinked blankly. Why?
- Ah.
It was obvious upon reflection.
The anomaly known as dopamine had no 'happy memories.' It had lived off human misfortune until it was exterminated.
Thus.
- I've only dreamt of a miserable life.
- Now, I want to live a happy dream.
This was the only happy memory for the anomaly.
- I am human.
Jingle.
In the dream within a dream, the anomaly left those words as its final will and burst apart.
Just before it died, the anomaly had a broad smile.
To this anomaly, the happiest day was its moment of suicide.
"..."
I watched the anomaly endlessly repeating its suicide in the dream, reveling in happiness, and I had to admit it to myself.
There was an anomaly here that was human—excessively human.
Footnotes:
[1] La Pietà is a marble sculpture created by Michaelangelo depicting the moment Jesus was taken down from the cross and given to his mother, Mary.
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