Euan calmly rinsed the burnt pan in the sink, the faint smell of charred food lingering in the air. But it didn't seem to bother him; his movements were slow, deliberate, as if nothing could disrupt his serenity. Dinner was delayed, but to him, it wasn't a big deal. He wiped his hands on a dish towel, his face an unwavering picture of calm. Behind him, James stood awkwardly at the table, shifting from foot to foot, the weight of guilt heavy on his shoulders.
"I'm really sorry, Euan," James said, his voice a mixture of embarrassment and genuine apology. His words stumbled out, unsure, as his eyes flickered nervously between Euan and the ground.
Euan glanced over his shoulder with a slight tilt of his head. His face remained composed, but there was a softness in his eyes. He wiped his hands on the dish towel before turning to face James fully. "It's not a big deal," he said with an easy, untroubled tone, the words almost dismissive. "We can eat late. But I've never seen you this glued to your phone before. You've been smiling at it all evening. What's going on?"
James chuckled softly, the sound a little sheepish. He rubbed the back of his neck, his cheeks flushing with a light pink. "Ah, yeah… sorry about that." He shifted from foot to foot, trying to suppress the grin tugging at his lips. "I got caught up texting someone. Wasn't supposed to take this long."
Euan raised an eyebrow, leaning casually against the counter, arms crossed. His voice remained gentle, though playful curiosity laced his words. "Texting someone? You don't usually smile like that when you're just chatting. Spill it, James. What's going on?"
James shot him a quick glance, then looked away, the grin growing wider despite his attempt to rein it in. "Well... it's nothing serious," he mumbled, though his body language betrayed the excitement rippling under the surface.
Euan chuckled softly, shaking his head. "James, I've known you long enough to see through that."
James laughed, but the sound was a little strained, as if there was more beneath it. The laughter wasn't just the result of embarrassment—it carried a hint of something else. Something conflicted. He wasn't just hiding a new romance; he was hiding uncertainty, maybe even fear. Giving his number to Kyle had felt like crossing an invisible line, exposing a vulnerable part of himself he wasn't sure he was ready to share, especially with everything going on around him.
To deflect Euan's probing, James quickly reached for the pan Euan had been cleaning. "I've got it," he said, forcing a smile. "I'll handle the food now, promise I'll pay attention this time. Why don't you head outside and grab some air while I finish up? I won't let anything burn again."
Euan hesitated, not wanting to leave just yet. The encounter with Youn-Jae earlier still lingered uneasily in his mind. "I don't know…" he trailed off, his voice uncertain, reluctant to step outside.
James, sensing the hesitation, gave him a reassuring smile, his eyes softening with genuine concern. "Go on, it'll be fine. Just take a moment to relax. I'll call you when it's ready."
After a brief moment, Euan nodded, though his apprehension lingered. "Alright," he said softly, "but I won't go far."
Stepping outside, the cool evening air hit him like a breath of fresh clarity. He promised himself he wouldn't stray too close to Youn-Jae's villa. His thoughts were still unsettled, but for now, he would embrace the quiet, take the moment of peace.
It had been ten minutes since Euan sat quietly on the cold sand, his knees pulled slightly toward his chest, his arms loosely draped over them. His breath misted in the night air as he murmured to himself, "I miss the villa... Kevin and Hana too." His voice was low, carrying a trace of longing, barely audible against the sound of the waves softly lapping at the shore. The vast, dark sea before him seemed to mirror the emptiness inside, stretching endlessly toward the horizon.
Then, a sudden voice pierced through the stillness. "Homesick?" The voice was familiar, low, and impossible to ignore. Euan's heart skipped a beat. He lifted his head and saw Youn-Jae standing just a few feet away, silhouetted against the moonlit backdrop. A wave of nervousness washed over Euan, and he quickly looked away, unable to meet Youn-Jae's intense gaze. His throat tightened, and his thoughts scrambled, searching for something to say, something to ease the sudden tension between them.
Youn-Jae hadn't planned on finding Euan like this. After their last encounter, he thought it was best to keep his distance, but when he stumbled upon Euan sitting alone in the cold night, something in him shifted. His chest tightened, and despite the pounding of his heart, he found himself drawn to Euan, moving toward him as if compelled by an invisible force. His breath was uneven, his steps hesitant. He hadn't planned on approaching, but here he was, standing before him.
Without a word, Youn-Jae lowered himself to the sand, sitting a few feet away to give Euan space. He kept his distance, not wanting to make things more awkward than they already were. The silence stretched between them, thick with unspoken words, but the rhythmic crashing of the waves filled the void. Youn-Jae fixed his gaze on the sea, though his peripheral vision was acutely aware of Euan. His presence stirred something deep inside him, making it hard to focus on anything else.
Euan, still uneasy, shifted slightly, trying to look anywhere but at Youn-Jae. The air between them was charged, thick with emotion neither of them knew how to articulate. Euan sneaked the occasional glance at Youn-Jae, who seemed lost in thought, staring at the ocean.
Despite the discomfort, there was an undeniable pull between them—one neither of them could deny. The silence wasn't awkward, but heavy, filled with emotions neither of them knew how to express.
Youn-Jae inhaled deeply, the salty air filling his lungs, helping to calm his racing heart. He wanted to speak, to bridge the gap, but for now, sitting beside Euan in the quiet of the night, with only the sound of the waves between them, felt enough.
Euan's breath hitched in his throat, the tension thick as he finally gathered the courage to speak. "Uhm... Sir, I'm so sorry," he whispered, his voice barely audible. His eyes were lowered, his fingers anxiously fidgeting in his lap.
Youn-Jae, lost in his own thoughts, snapped back to reality at the sound of Euan's voice. He turned his head slowly, his eyes locking onto Euan's with an intensity that seemed to search for something beneath the surface. There was a vulnerability in his gaze, something raw that mirrored the turmoil inside him. His heart clenched.
"It's okay," Youn-Jae responded softly, his voice calm, but a flicker of emotion passed through his eyes. "I must've startled you earlier... triggered your anxiety." His words were gentle, almost apologetic, as if trying to soothe the tension.
Euan dropped his head, unable to meet Youn-Jae's gaze. Embarrassment weighed heavily on his shoulders, making it hard to lift his eyes. The silence lingered, thick with unresolved emotions. Youn-Jae shifted slightly, his eyes moving back to the sea as he gathered his scattered thoughts.
"I was just... taken aback earlier when I saw you," Youn-Jae said, his voice softer now, almost as if confessing something painful. His gaze remained on the dark ocean. "You... you really look like hi—"
"Ji-Won," Euan interrupted, his voice quiet but firm. The name hung in the cold air between them, heavy with significance. "It's the second time I've heard that," he added, his head still bowed, fingers nervously fidgeting. He wasn't sure of the weight the name carried, but he could feel it in the way Youn-Jae said it—the depth of the connection, the sorrow that clung to the name.
Youn-Jae's breath hitched, the name pulling at a well of grief and longing he had buried deep inside. His voice trembled slightly, as if each word was a wound he couldn't heal. "But... he died three years ago," he whispered, the sorrow in his voice raw and unguarded.
Euan could hear the pain in Youn-Jae's voice, the grief and loss that bled into every syllable. His heart ached in response. Hesitantly, he glanced up, meeting Youn-Jae's gaze and seeing the depth of the pain there. For a moment, Euan wasn't sure what to do or say. But something stirred within him—an instinct to reach out.
"Do I really look like him?" Euan asked softly, his voice trembling with uncertainty. He didn't fully understand the weight of his question, but he could feel the importance of it, the way Youn-Jae spoke about Ji-Won, and the raw emotion tied to the name.
Youn-Jae's eyes glistened with unshed tears as he turned his gaze back to Euan. "Yes... so much," he whispered, his voice thick with emotion. "As if I'm seeing him right now, through you."
Without thinking, without fully understanding why, Euan's body moved on its own. He leaned toward Youn-Jae, closing the space between them, and wrapped his arms around him. The gesture was instinctive, born of a sudden need to offer warmth, comfort, and connection. He didn't know why he did it, but something inside him recognized Youn-Jae's need for solace, for this moment of shared vulnerability.
Youn-Jae froze, caught off guard by the unexpected embrace. A deep ache welled up in his chest, consumed by the eerie familiarity of the gesture. It felt surreal, holding him again—a memory so close, yet agonizingly out of reach. His lips trembled, and he teetered on the edge of tears. With shaky hands, he gradually wrapped his arms around Euan, resting a hand on his back, savoring the warmth of the embrace even as the weight of Euan's lost memories pressed heavily on his heart
The warmth of your hug feels both near and far,
A haunting familiarity and bittersweet memory.
I know one day, the time will align,
You'll return to me, and I'll make you mine.
But until that moment, I bear this deep ache,
Longing for you in the stillness I make.
This heart, though battered and worn from the fight,
Yearns for your love through the cold, lonely night.
For every whispered wish on the winds of despair,
I search for you, but you're never there.
Still, I hold onto dreams that bring both joy and sorrow,
Hoping that one day, you'll be my tomorrow.
The story doesn't end here...
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