BY THE WAY." Mo Xi looked up, interrupting Gu Mang's surreptitious approach. "The third of next month is Yue Chenqing's birthday."
"Ah?" Gu Mang jumped, sweating with fear. He hadn't heard a single word Mo Xi said. Like a dreamer startled awake, he looked away in panic, refusing to meet his eyes. "Oh…okay…" he murmured, touching his reddened earlobes.
His heart was still pounding. What had he meant to do? Why did he suddenly feel such pressing need? Between wolves, biting each other signaled dominance and submission—but what did it mean between him and Mo Xi? Was it the same? He wondered if he longed to overpower Mo Xi, but he discovered he didn't know what would count as "overpowering." Did he want Mo Xi to kneel to him? No. Not that, he wasn't interested in that at all. Or did he want…
"Are you listening?"
Gu Mang came back to his senses. "What? Yep! I'm listening, I'm listening."
Mo Xi looked at him and frowned. "Why are your ears red?"
Gu Mang scratched at them. "I-it's because I'm hot."
Mo Xi eyed him. He didn't know what Gu Mang's problem was, but he was almost finished with dinner anyway. He set down his chopsticks and said, "We need to send Yue Chenqing a gift. I'm busy and can't get away from my responsibilities, so you and Li Wei can handle it."
"Mn…" Gu Mang paused. "Why are we giving presents to Little White Bird?"
Mo Xi's face darkened. "Didn't you say you were listening?"
"…Must've missed it."
"The third of next month," Mo Xi repeated, grinding his teeth, "is Yue Chenqing's birthday."
This time, Gu Mang finally understood. His eyes widened. "It's Little White Bird's birthday?"
"Mn."
Mo Xi saw the sparkle in Gu Mang's eyes and was somewhat taken aback. He knew Gu Mang was fond of other people's celebrations. No matter if it was a birthday or a wedding, he loved nothing more than to join the fun. When Luoli-jun's son got married recently, the majestic bridal procession had wound its way through the city. Gu Mang wasn't allowed to come and go as he pleased, but upon hearing the clamor of gongs and drums, he climbed onto the roof and sprawled on the tiles to eat melon seeds and watch the procession. He clapped and cheered with the passersby, adding his voice and applause from the rooftop. After nightfall, Mo Xi allowed him to go outside, and he happily hunted for peanuts, pine nuts, and dried longans that had fallen between the cracks in the brick pavement during the day. Full of delight, he brought back an entire pocketful and even offered to split some with Mo Xi.
"I know what you're thinking," Mo Xi told the big rat Gu Mang. "But I'm afraid you'll be disappointed."
"Huh?"
"Yue Manor never arranges a great banquet for Yue Chenqing's birthday, so there won't be any candy or snacks tossed on the ground for you to collect."
Sure enough, Gu Mang wilted. "Oh…" he murmured. After a pause, he curiously inquired, "But Little White Bird is clearly very pampered by his family. Why don't they hold a banquet?"
Mo Xi took a sip of the hot soup. "It's due to the circumstances of Yue Chenqing's birth," he replied. "Yue Chenqing's mother was from the imperial family, and she passed away due to complications in childbirth."
Gu Mang was taken aback, but he quickly put it together. "So Yue Manor doesn't arrange a banquet for Little White Bird because Little White Bird's papa still hasn't forgotten Little White Bird's mama?"
"Since when was Yue Juntian so faithful? There's no chance he would do such a thing out of respect for his deceased wife," Mo Xi responded blandly. "But whether he would or not, Murong Huang was still of royal blood. Even if she died years ago, Yue Juntian still has to honor the imperial family. That's why he keeps his own son's birthday as spartan as possible."
"So that's how it is…" Gu Mang mumbled. He ticked the names he knew off on his fingers and suddenly exclaimed, "So Murong Chuyi is also part of the imperial family?"
"He doesn't count," Mo Xi replied.
"Wh-why? Isn't his surname also Murong…?"
"All of Chonghua's nobles have gold trim on their robes, but Murong Chuyi's clothes are trimmed in silver," said Mo Xi. "Why do you imagine that is?"
"Because white and silver suits him best, so he looks more handsome that way," Gu Mang responded in earnest.
Mo Xi glowered. "Do you think this is a beauty contest?"
"Well, why then?"
"Murong Chuyi isn't of royal blood. He's an orphan who was taken in by Murong Huang…Yue Chenqing's birth mother, that is. In her youth, Murong Huang visited a temple on Mount Han, outside the city. She came across a child on the way who had been abandoned on the steps of the temple. She felt they were fated to meet, so she took him in as a little brother. She even petitioned the late emperor to bestow the imperial surname upon him."
Under his breath, Gu Mang repeated a few snatches of Mo Xi's explanation to himself several times before finally understood. His blue eyes widened. "So Little Dragon Lady was adopted?!"
"Stop giving people random nicknames." Mo Xi felt a headache coming on. "You might get away with it for Yue Chenqing, but if Murong Chuyi heard you call him Little Dragon Lady, he'd shred you alive and use the pieces as raw material in his artificing forge."
Gu Mang waved a hand. "He's not that bad. Little Dragon Lady is a great person. Today, I ev—"
He cut himself off mid-word, realizing his tongue had slipped. He glanced apprehensively at Mo Xi, hoping he hadn't noticed what Gu Mang just said. But fate never bowed to the whims of man. General Mo had the eyes of a hawk and the ears of an owl, so how could he have missed it? He stared at Gu Mang through narrowed eyes. "You saw him today?"
Knowing he couldn't conceal this adventure from Mo Xi, Gu Mang helplessly crossed his arms and said in sycophantic tones, "Nothing can get past you, Xihe-jun. You're so wise."
"Don't try flattering me. How did you meet him?"
Gu Mang had no choice but to tell Mo Xi how he had bumped into Murong Chuyi at Peach Blossom Lake. Remembering Murong Chuyi's warning, he kept the story brief and spared the details.
He had expected Mo Xi would be at least a little surprised by the revelation of Murong Chuyi's condition, but Mo Xi only frowned and sighed. "How pointless."
"What do you mean?"
"Yue Chenqing came to see me a few days ago and asked to borrow a copy of the Liao Kingdom's Compendium of Plants Demonic and Divine. He said he was searching for a cure-all herbal medicine," Mo Xi explained. "Unfortunately, I lent the book to the overseer at the cultivation academy two weeks ago. I'm not sure if Yue Chenqing would ask him for it."
Gu Mang blinked. "So Little White Bird has known about his uncle's symptoms for several days already?"
"Longer than that," Mo Xi said. "He's known for a few years that his fourth uncle's had some health issues. One of the reasons he came with me to the northern frontier was to seek a cure beyond Chonghua's borders. But Yue Chenqing also knows Murong Chuyi can't stand the meddling of others, so he's done all his research secretly, behind his uncle's back."
Gu Mang was stunned. "So Little White Bird has known for ages. But then why did Murong Chuyi say he only knew the gist of it?"
"Murong Chuyi isn't wrong. Yue Chenqing knows his uncle is sick— he doesn't know what manner of affliction he suffers from. He can't find the specific cure, so he's looking for a panacea."
Gu Mang was baffled. "Why does Murong Chuyi want to keep hiding it from him…?"
"They've never had a very good relationship." Mo Xi sighed. "The Yue Clan's family matters are a total mess."
Gu Mang sat in silence and considered the tangle between Jiang Yexue, Yue Chenqing, and Murong Chuyi for a good while. In the end, he could only clutch his head and sigh. "Too confusing—I give up."
Mo Xi looked askance. "What's too confusing?"
As he spoke, Gu Mang counted on his fingers. "I'm trying to figure out why their relationship is bad. First, look at Murong Chuyi—he was a child taken in and brought up by Little White Bird's mama, so why would he dislike his sister's son?"
In the past, Gu Mang innately understood the ways of the world when it came to matters like these. But now, in his ignorance, he needed Mo Xi to explain it to him. "It's very simple," said Mo Xi. "To Murong Chuyi, Murong Huang was both a teacher and a sister. Although Murong Huang called him her brother, she treated him and cared for him like he was her son. When she married into Yue Manor, she specifically asked His Imperial Majesty to allow Murong Chuyi to accompany her. That's why Murong Chuyi lives with the Yue Clan."
Gu Mang nodded vigorously. "I get it—in other words, Little White Bird and Little Dragon Lady are technically uncle and nephew, but are in truth more like big brother and little brother."
"Correct," Mo Xi said. "Murong Huang was Murong Chuyi's benefactor. When she was alive, Murong Chuyi accompanied her day and night, listened attentively to her every word, and regarded her with the utmost love and respect. Naturally, he wanted her to have only the best home to return to as well. But Yue Juntian…"
Mo Xi pursed his lips, unwilling to elaborate on his opinions of this person. But Gu Mang spoke clearly: "He's a bad person."
"Back then, Yue Juntian had a bad reputation, romantically speaking," explained Mo Xi. "His parents and Murong Huang's had arranged their children's marriage long before, but Yue Juntian was profligate by nature. By the time he was sixteen, he had already gotten a qin player with child, taken her as a concubine, and sired a son."
"Impressive," Gu Mang mumbled. "Before he even married Murong Huang, he already had a concubine, and a child on top of that." He pondered for a moment. "Was that child Jiang Yexue?"
"Mn." Mo Xi was uncomfortable discussing other people's dalliances. "It was him."
"Then I understand why Little Dragon Lady doesn't like Jiang Yexue," Gu Mang said. "Yue Juntian took two wives. Murong Chuyi is the little brother of the first wife, Murong Huang, and so he's on the first wife's side. Jiang Yexue is the son of the concubine, and so he's on the concubine's side."
Mo Xi had no wish to debate matters of wives and concubines. Lowering his lashes, he sighed softly. "Yes. Although such things aren't uncommon in noble families, it's just as you said: Murong Chuyi revered his foster sister and was greatly displeased with the marriage. Furthermore, with his disposition, Yue Juntian would often make Murong Huang sad or angry… So Murong Chuyi has always had very complicated feelings toward this nephew of his, whose blood is half Yue Juntian's." Mo Xi poured another two cups of hot tea, pushing one toward Gu Mang and holding the other in his hands.
Still perplexed, Gu Mang said, "I still don't really understand… Even if half of Little White Bird's blood is from someone he doesn't like, at least he's Murong Chuyi's sister's son. Don't people say, 'love both the house and its crows'? Why doesn't he like a child his sister must have loved dearly?"
"Because he thinks his sister wasn't happy. He believes that this child's birth was a mistake on top of a mistake."
Steam rose from the tea in spirals, twisting like the old grudges they discussed. "On top of that, there is another, more important, reason…"
"What's that?" asked Gu Mang.
"The complications with the birth didn't come out of nowhere," Mo Xi replied. "From the moment Murong Huang married into the Yue family, she often fought with Yue Juntian and lived in a state of constant worry. On the day she went into labor, a woman whom Yue Juntian had an affair with came to the manor to cause trouble and said plenty of vulgar things. Murong Huang was already frail and on the verge of collapse. After this disturbance, her qi and blood circulation were badly affected. In the end, she lost all faith and passed away."
Gu Mang let out a low sound of surprise.
Mo Xi sighed. "So you see—both the marriage and its issue were mistakes. In the end, these events stole the most important person on earth to Murong Chuyi. This is something he can't let go of even after so many years. Now that he's a master artificer, Yue Juntian has tried to break the ice with him many times, but Murong Chuyi won't even give him the time of day. As for Yue Chenqing…Murong Chuyi has never known how to face him." After a pause, Mo Xi concluded, "That's pretty much the story."
Gu Mang still couldn't quite make sense of this complicated drama. Bewilderment showed in his azure eyes. After a long while, he spoke, puzzled: "But Murong Huang's death isn't Yue Chenqing's fault—he was only a baby…"
"Of course Murong Chuyi understands that Yue Chenqing is blameless in all this. But understanding is not the same as forgiveness."
Rubbing his chin, Gu Mang repeated Mo Xi's words under his breath. "Understanding is not the same as forgiveness…" His eyes flashed with confusion. "Why does this sound familiar?"
"You said it to me once."
"Really?" Gu Mang exclaimed in wonder. "Wow, I'm so amazing."
Mo Xi said nothing. Seeing the pleased and self-satisfied look on Gu Mang's face, Mo Xi decided not to tell him that he had gleaned this entire analysis of Murong Chuyi's psyche from Gu Mang himself way back when. People's hearts were complex; Mo Xi hadn't understood this when he was younger. Nor could he easily make sense of the love and hatred between others, their affection and enmity. It was Gu Mang who carefully explained these things to him, who taught him the ins and outs of love and hate.
In memory, Mo Xi saw how Gu Mang, head pillowed against his arms as he lay on the riverbank, had once brought up Jiang Yexue as they chatted. Gu Mang had spat out the foxtail grass in his mouth and heaved a heavy sigh. "Jiang Yexue hasn't had it easy. To him, understanding and forgiveness are actually one and the same. See—after so many years, Murong Chuyi still treats Yue Chenqing so coldly because of his foster sister. Jiang Yexue's mama passed away too, but he didn't fight with the other two. He can let go of the past and treat the two of them with courtesy… Good heavens, what a saint. If I were in his place, I might have gone insane."
Mo Xi had turned to look at the stargazing youth lying beside him, his gaze full of tenderness. He knew that wasn't true; even if Gu Mang had been in Jiang Yexue's place, he would've also maintained his composure. He wouldn't have taken his anger out on anyone or blamed them unfairly. He would've treated everyone with kindness. After all, Gu Mang was bright and cheerful, like the sun.
If someone clung to Murong Chuyi and cried, Murong Chuyi would push them away and leave with a sweep of his sleeves. If someone did the same to Jiang Yexue, he would share in their sorrow and listen to them speak of their hurt.
But Gu Mang? If someone was clinging to Gu Mang and crying, Gu Mang would definitely make them smile through their tears. The one who brought laughter and light to others—that was the Gu-shixiong Mo Xi had always loved in his deepest heart.
Several days later, Mo Xi finally wrapped up all the military affairs that had descended upon him after the spring hunt. It was truly fortunate that Gu Mang was there to look after him toward the end. Although Mo Xi procrastinated before every meal, he at least ate regularly and didn't put the medicine from Medicine Master Jiang to waste.
On this particular day, Mo Xi had nothing to attend to. He considered if he should pay a visit to the cultivation academy and retrieve his copy of Compendium of Plants Demonic and Divine so that he could lend it to Yue Chenqing.
Mo Xi pondered as he got ready. Although Yue Chenqing had been lazy ever since he was little, he had always treated his fourth uncle as his guiding star. When it came to anything involving Murong Chuyi, Yue Chenqing would spare no earnestness or effort. The child might have seemed unfocused, but in truth, he could be blindly obstinate once he was convinced of something. In the fearlessness of youth, a chest full of passion could hamper one's judgment. Hopefully Yue Chenqing could stay out of trouble.
Just as he was about to step out, Li Wei rushed into the hall, his face full of worry. "My lord!"
"What happened? What's with that look on your face?"
"Something's happened at Yue Manor," responded Li Wei.
Mo Xi shivered, his heart pounding. How could it be? Speak of the devil. "Is it Yue Chenqing…?" he asked.
Li Wei's eyes flew wide. "It is! My lord, how'd you guess? Young Yue-gongzi has disappeared!"