The first lecture let out twenty minutes early, and Xu Yan took his sweet time stretching before finally pulling out his phone. Out of habit more than anything, he opened his Notes app.
Today's Survival Log
√ Attended class.
√Didn't meet the protagonists.
√Didn't die.
He nodded, satisfied. "So far, so good."
He was about to shove the phone back in his pocket when two girls hurried past, talking fast.
"Did you hear? They're making a scene near the west garden."
"Someone got caught two-timing, I heard!"
Xu Yan's ears practically perked up on their own. His thumb froze mid-air above the screen.
The girls were already halfway across the quad. "Hurry, if we're late it'll be over!"
He watched them go. Then looked back down at his notes.
Didn't die.
He nodded seriously to himself. "I'm only going to observe."
[Watching isn't participating.]
[I'm a law-abiding citizen. I will just watch it from far way .]
That settled, he turned and headed for the west garden.
The garden wasn't usually this crowded. But, Today, students were scattered around in loose clusters, all very committed to the bit that they were just chatting — while their eyes kept drifting toward the pavilion in the center.
Xu Yan slowed down, scanned left, then right, and picked a bench under a tree. Not too close, not too far. Excellent for watching.
There happened to be a milk tea stand nearby, which he considered a sign from the universe. Five minutes later, he was back with a large brown sugar milk tea, settling in like a man at the opera.
"...Life," he murmured, taking his first sip.
The drama had already started.
A girl stood with her arms crossed, voice deceptively calm. "So. You told me you'd be at the library until nine."
The guy rubbed the back of his neck. "I was."
"The café next to the library counts as studying?"
"...Basically."
"I see. So your study partner just happened to hold your hand while you were discussing calculus?"
He froze.
Xu Yan lowered his cup. "...Brother," he muttered under his breath, "your brain stopped working before your mouth did."
The guy waved his hands frantically. "It wasn't like that! She tripped, I was just—"
The girl was already unlocking her phone. "Oh? Did she also trip into this photo?"
She turned the screen around. The girl in the photo was leaning comfortably against his shoulder, and he was smiling right at the camera.
His face drained of color.
"Lying after the evidence drops," Xu Yan whispered. "Bold. I respect the confidence."
The guy tried one more time. "You have to trust me. I can explain everything."
She looked at him for a long moment, then let out a short laugh. "You know, I actually came here planning to forgive you." She reached over and unclipped a small cat keychain from his backpack. "I bought this. I'll be taking it back." A pause. "Keep the excuses. I don't collect trash."
She walked off without a backward glance.
He just stood there. Didn't say a word.
Xu Yan nodded slowly, thoroughly impressed. "Nice. That last line deserves extra points. Clean finish."
He thought about it for another second. "...Seven and a half. Would've been an eight if she'd let him stand there another thirty seconds before walking off."
"Six," said a voice beside him.
Xu Yan nodded along without even thinking about it. "Mm — the emotional buildup was good, but his acting was terrible, and honestly the excuse showed zero creativity. 'She tripped'? Brother, at minimum say she was your cousin."
"Exactly."
Xu Yan took another satisfied sip of milk tea — and then choked, mid-swallow.
He'd come here alone.
So who, exactly, had just agreed with him?
He turned his head, very slowly.
A young man sat at the other end of the bench, black hair, cold eyes, a bottle of mineral water dangling loosely from one hand. Even sitting there doing nothing in particular, he was pulling more attention than everyone else in the garden combined.
Xu Yan just stared.
"...Damn," he breathed, before he could stop himself. "He's handsome." Then, correcting himself internally: no — really handsome. Whoever drew the official illustration had clearly never actually seen this man in person, because that was borderline fraud. Cold expression or not, if this guy ignored him, Xu Yan would probably thank him for the privilege.
"...No wonder everyone's chasing him," he mumbled. "I'd chase him too."
Then his brain finally caught up.
Black hair. Cold face. Unfairly handsome.
"...Lu Yichen?"
Their eyes met. The corner of Lu Yichen's mouth twitched upward, just barely.
"You've been reviewing their performance for the last ten minutes."
Xu Yan's face went completely blank. "...You heard that?"
"All of it."
Xu Yan slowly put his face in his hand.
"...Can secondhand embarrassment actually kill a person?" he mumbled into his palm.
Because if it could, he was about to become the first cannon fodder in recorded history to die of it.