The bell rang.
Koro-sensei walked toward the window, the roll book tucked under one tentacle and a look of pure satisfaction on his face.
"Alright, class! I'll see you tomorrow. I finally got paid, so I'm heading out for some Shanghai crab! Nuruhuhuhu!"
He slipped through the open window and vanished in a yellow blur.
Akira leaned back in his chair, stretching with a long, lazy sigh. The newly installed air conditioner hummed quietly above them, sending cool air throughout the classroom.
"Finally. I can sleep more comfortably with this AC. As I thought, asking for an air conditioner was the right choice."
Erika, sitting beside him, slowly turned her head.
"…Sleep?"
Akira immediately sat upright.
"Relax. I mean relax. Not sleep."
From Ritsu's main body, now positioned behind the desk—while Itona had taken her old spot—a familiar face appeared on the screen.
"Akira-kun, you slept fifty-eight minutes more than normal today."
Akira twisted around in his seat.
"Ritsu, how could you?"
Erika's eyes narrowed.
"What did I tell you about sleeping in class?"
Akira raised both hands defensively.
"It was just… the AC is really good, and… I won't do it again."
"No." Erika's voice was calm and final. "Since you slept during class, it's punishment time. You can't do any experiments for the rest of the day."
Akira's soul left his body.
"Noooooooo!"
He slumped forward onto the desk, pressing his forehead against the wood.
"This is so unfair…"
Then he slowly lifted his head and looked up at Erika with the most pitiful expression he could manage.
The secret technique—
Puppy Eyes Persuasion.
—activated at full power.
The remaining students who hadn't left yet all stared.
Wow… he looks exactly like a scolded puppy.
Even Erika, who by now had developed some resistance to it, lasted only a few seconds.
She abruptly stood up, her face slightly pink.
"I have something to do. Wait here. And don't cause any trouble."
She quickly escaped the classroom before the puppy eyes could do any more damage.
Akira remained slumped on the bench, completely defeated.
As more students began to leave, Nagisa noticed Itona still sitting at his desk, focused on something in front of him. Small tools and electronic parts were spread across the surface.
Nagisa walked over.
"You're sticking around, Itona-kun? What are you making?"
Itona didn't look up.
"Just what it looks like. An RC tank."
Akira, still face-down on his desk, lifted his head slightly.
"…Oh. A cool toy."
Itona's hands stopped.
"It's not a toy. It's a weapon of assassination."
Nagisa tilted his head.
"Why?"
Itona tightened his grip on the screwdriver. His fingers trembled faintly.
"I had an all-day cram session with that octopus yesterday. It stressed me out."
He stared at the half-finished tank.
"He really ticked me off… so I'll use this to go kill him."
"…Go kill him?" Nagisa repeated.
Maehara leaned over Itona's shoulder, his eyes widening.
"But this thing… it's like crazy high-tech!"
The remaining boys gathered around the desk.
Takebayashi adjusted his glasses, carefully examining the exposed internals.
"This thing uses cell phone camera parts. Wow, Itona… you thought up these tweaks yourself?"
"I learned basic electronics at my old man's shop," Itona replied. "Anybody could do it. Except Terasaka."
Terasaka's head snapped up.
"What did you just say?!"
Itona ignored him.
He set the finished tank on the floor and picked up the controller.
The little machine glided forward with almost no sound, lined up on an empty can near the wall, and fired.
A pink anti-sensei BB punched the can clean off the floor.
Sugaya let out a low whistle.
"Amazing… it's practically silent when it moves and when it shoots."
"I used a lot of electronic controls to minimize gear noise," Itona explained.
Akira had already sat up properly, his eyes fixed on the tank with obvious interest.
"No. It's still too loud. I mean, we're targeting Koro-sensei, remember? If you want it to be more silent, try adding sound insulation, electromagnetic controls, and suspension, and—"
Terasaka cut him off.
"Wait. Doesn't all of that sound way too high-tech? Can anyone even make that?"
Akira blinked.
"No. These are basics."
Maehara pointed at him.
"So can you make it?"
Akira's expression froze.
He immediately looked away.
"…No. I am forbidden from doing any experiments."
Isogai nodded, practical as always.
"Then for now, we should stick with this."
Nagisa crouched beside the tank, studying it.
"Even if you can aim this at him… where would you aim?"
Itona was quiet for a moment.
Then he spoke, his voice low and certain.
"I'll let you guys in on something. There is one ideal place we should be aiming for."
He tapped the center of his own chest.
"He has a heart. Right under his tie. If we hit that, we can take him down in a single strike."
Everyone stared at Itona.
The sudden piece of information hung in the air for a second too long.
Maehara was the first to recover.
"Wait. He has a heart?"
Nagisa nodded, as if it were obvious.
"Of course he has one. All living beings have one."
Takebayashi adjusted his glasses.
"That may not be entirely true. I heard a lot of people are heartless."
"…I don't think that's what it actually means," Nagisa said.
Akira coughed quietly and turned his face away, suddenly very interested in the wall.
"Anyway," he said a little too quickly, "we can use this for assassination. Why not take it for a test drive first?"
No one noticed his strange behavior.
Then Isogai nodded.
"Yeah. Not a bad idea."
Okajima leaned in, unusually serious.
"If it breaks during the real deal, we'll be clean out of luck."
Itona didn't argue. He set the tank on the floor, pushed the control stick forward, and sent it rolling out of the classroom into the corridor.
The small screen on the controller showed the hallway from a low angle. When the tank reached the staff room, it stopped.
The door opened.
Nakamura, Yada, and Kurahashi stepped out.
"Bitch-sensei, bye!" Nakamura called.
"See you later!" Yada added.
Irina's voice came from inside.
"Go straight home now. No detours."
"We will," Kurahashi said.
A second later, Nakamura lowered her voice.
"Want to stop for a snack?"
Kurahashi cheered.
"Let's go, let's go!"
The three girls walked away down the hall.
Inside the classroom, the remaining boys watched the screen in complete silence.
Then Okajima asked, dead serious,
"See anything?"
Maehara shook his head, equally serious.
"No. The camera didn't get that far. The field of view is too narrow."
Muramatsu frowned.
"Can't we put in a bigger camera?"
Itona answered flatly.
"It'll increase the weight, decrease its mobility, and make target acquisition more difficult."
The group fell quiet, thinking.
Takebayashi raised a finger.
"In that case… why don't we use a fisheye lens on the camera?"
Everyone turned to him at once.
"Takebayashi?!"
He continued as if discussing a normal science project.
"If we have the CPU correct any distortion in the received image, even a small lens can give us a wide field of view."
Okajima's eyes lit up.
"Got it. I'll find a small fisheye lens with a big viewing angle."
Takebayashi looked at Akira.
"Can you build a distortion-correction program?"
Akira answered without hesitation.
"No. I choose life."
Okajima blinked, then nodded.
"…Understandable. Ritsu, can you do it?"
Ritsu's screen lit up behind Akira's desk, cheerful and completely unaware.
"Sure! I don't know what you need it for, but I'll take care of it!"
"We need a recording function too," Takebayashi added.
Okajima nodded hard.
"Yeah. It's a must for effective analysis of our upgrade."
Akira muttered under his breath,
"Guys. Living is better."
Maehara pumped a fist.
"All in the name of assassination! Onward! Uh… Prototype 0!"
The tank rushed toward the building exit—and immediately tumbled down the front steps.
The camera cut to static.
The boys stared at the black screen.
Kimura was already running for the door.
"I'll go flip it over!"
"Thanks, Kimura!" Maehara called after him.
Takebayashi frowned, studying the fallen machine in his mind.
"Shouldn't its suspension be able to handle uneven surfaces?"
Yoshida cracked his knuckles.
"I'll come up with something. I know a little about drive systems and metalworking."
"This light khaki chassis color is too obvious," Takebayashi added.
Akira opened his mouth.
"How about optical camouflage—"
He stopped himself so hard his teeth clicked.
"…No. Wait. I can't join in."
Sugaya waved a paintbrush that had appeared from somewhere.
"I'm on it. School camouflage. I'll paint it up."
Maehara was already sketching on a scrap of paper.
"RC stuff is hardly human-sized. In the name of better maneuvering, I'll draw up a map."
From a short distance away, Sugino watched the growing frenzy with a dead look.
"They really lose themselves when smut's involved."
Nagisa sighed.
"…So sleazy."
Akira sank lower in his chair and stared at the ceiling, already constructing an alibi.
How should I prove I have nothing to do with this?
And so the day ended, each of them lost in their own thoughts.
---
The next morning, most of the boys gathered in the classroom early.
Akira was among them. Before leaving the house, he had told Erika he needed to "save some lost souls," then disappeared before she could ask what that meant.
Soon Yoshida, Muramatsu, and Sugaya arrived as well.
Yoshida set a small assembly on the desk.
"Hey. I finished the transmission yesterday."
Muramatsu put down a bag.
"Guys. I made us breakfast."
Sugaya placed the freshly painted tank on the bench.
"How do you like this school camo?"
Isogai looked at all three of them.
"You guys do realize this is all for an assassination plan, right?"
Okajima waved a hand.
"Yeah, we know, class president!"
Nagisa noticed the box under Akira's arm.
"Akira-kun, what's that box you're holding?"
Akira patted it once.
"Let's say it's a secret weapon. For unusual circumstances."
Nobody knew what that meant.
They also knew Akira.
After a short pause, they decided to leave him to it.
Okajima clapped his hands.
"All right. Let's get a test run in before the girls show up."
Everyone cheered.
"Yeah!"
They crowded around Itona as he guided the upgraded tank out behind the school building. The new transmission made the controls a little stiffer than the day before.
Okajima leaned over his shoulder.
"Argh, you idiot. Move carefully or it'll flip again."
Terasaka shoved in.
"Move. It's my turn."
While they fought over the controller, Isogai glanced at Itona.
"Itona, we're all working on this together. Why don't you give this thing a code name?"
Itona didn't look up.
"I'll think about it."
Terasaka immediately hit a rock.
Okajima threw both hands up.
"It crashed! Terasaka, you suck at this!"
Terasaka looked at him.
"Say what?!"
Then a shape filled the camera.
In front of the tank stood a weasel.
On the tiny screen, compared to the RC tank, it looked like a monster.
The classroom exploded.
"A monster!"
"Run—!"
"No, fire!"
Itona pulled the trigger.
The main gun spat a BB. The pellet bounced off the weasel's fur and dropped harmlessly into the grass.
Takebayashi adjusted his glasses with a grimace.
"The main gun is nowhere near strong enough. We'll have to tweak that too."
The weasel did not appreciate being shot.
It hissed, flattened its ears, and charged.
"Nooooo!"
Just as it was about to slam into the tank, something red smashed into the chassis from the side and sent it rolling.
The camera spun, righted itself, and focused again.
A small red RC truck now stood between the weasel and the tank.
Everyone stared.
"What is that?!"
Itona's eye twitched.
"…A truck?"
Nagisa looked around the room.
"But whose?"
They all turned at the same time.
Akira was on his phone, thumbs moving quickly over the screen.
The box at his feet was empty.
"Akira!"
He winked.
"Don't worry. Leave the rest to me."
Itona pointed at the screen.
"You crashed my tank."
Akira righteously said,
"I saved its life."
Terasaka's voice jumped.
"Wait! The mongoose is attacking!"
"That's not a mongoose, that's a weasel," Akira said, and jerked the truck sideways just as the animal lunged.
The weasel was fast. It twisted and chased the truck across the dirt.
Maehara leaned in.
"Does that thing have a weapon?"
"It's an RC truck," Akira said. "It doesn't have a weapon."
Nagisa frowned.
"Then why did you make an RC truck?"
Akira smiled.
"Because it can do this."
He sent the truck up a small rock like a ramp.
It launched into the air.
Akira tapped the screen.
"Now, Optimus Prime… transform."
The truck folded in midair.
Plates shifted. Arms locked into place.
A tiny robot in red and blue landed in the grass with a plastic thud.
The weasel actually flinched.
The classroom lost its mind.
"It's Optimus Prime!"
Nagisa put a hand to his forehead.
"…Of course it's not a normal truck."
Akira pointed at the screen like a general.
"Optimus Prime. Teach him a lesson."
The little robot raised one arm toward the weasel.
"One shall stand. One shall fall."
For half a second, the boys believed.
Then the weasel screeched and slammed into it.
The toy was fast enough to look cool.
It was not fast enough to matter.
The weasel bit down on the armor and shook the robot like a rag.
Yoshida shouted,
"He's getting wrecked! Make him fight back!"
Sugino asked the important question.
"Does he have any weapons?!"
Akira shook his head.
"No. I made him when I was little. My mom forbade me from adding any weapons."
Nagisa stared at him.
"Then what does he do?"
Akira answered proudly,
"He can say supportive quotes."
Everyone stared at him.
"…What?"
Akira tapped the screen again.
Optimus Prime, currently pinned to the dirt, declared with mechanical dignity,
"Freedom is the right of all sentient beings."
The classroom went silent.
Then everyone screamed at once.
"What is the use of that?!"
"At least say a proper line for the situation!"
"Make him fight!"
Akira remained calm.
"Don't worry. He's still Optimus Prime."
He pressed the screen.
The robot announced,
"I am going to turn into a truck now."
It collapsed back into vehicle mode.
The sudden change startled the weasel enough to fling it aside.
The truck bounced once and landed near the damaged RC tank.
Akira glanced at Itona.
"Itona, can you provide some cover fire?"
Itona's voice was ice.
"You broke the main gun when you slammed into it."
Silence again.
The weasel recovered and charged.
Terasaka slammed a hand on the desk.
"Do something!"
"I am trying, all right?!" Akira snapped. "He's still just a toy, and that weasel is stronger than I thought."
His eyes dropped to the tank.
"…I have to improvise."
He transformed Optimus Prime again.
The tiny robot grabbed the tank by its broken main gun and started spinning.
Akira's voice dropped into a terrible accent.
"So long-a, weasel."
He threw it.
The tank flew.
The weasel dodged at the last second, then decided it had had enough and bolted into the forest.
Akira lowered his phone.
"We won."
Everyone cheered.
"Yeahhhhh!"
Itona did not cheer.
"You broke my tank."
On the screen, the RC tank lay in two clean pieces.
The classroom screamed again.
"Nooooo!"
Okajima clutched his head.
"Now how are we supposed to look up girls' skirts?!"
A hand closed on his shoulder.
Okajima turned.
Kataoka was standing behind him.
"What's this about our skirts?"
Okajima's soul left his body.
"Karaoke! Nothing! We were talking about side skirts on cars! That's all!"
Okano walked in beside her.
"We heard all that."
Yada crossed her arms.
"Boys suck."
Kataoka looked past him.
"And who came up with the idea? Is it you, Itona?"
Itona did not hesitate.
"It's Okajima."
Okajima looked at him as if he had betrayed him.
"Hey!"
Ritsu's screen lit up at the worst possible time.
"Good morning, everyone! Oh, Okajima-san, I have the fisheye-lens correction program ready for you."
Every girl in the room turned toward him.
Okajima waved both hands.
"Wait! It's not just me! Say, Maehara!"
Maehara examined the ceiling with great interest.
"I have no idea what you're talking about."
Okajima screamed.
"Maehara, you traitor!"
Isogai sighed.
"Guys. Just give it up."
Kataoka's voice was calm and final.
"Either way, it's clear you were all in this little scheme."
The girls answered together.
"Boys suck."
The classroom door opened again.
Erika stepped in, looked straight at Akira, and asked,
"Akira. So this is why you were early?"
Akira shot to his feet.
"Wait, Erika. I am innocent. I have no interest in skirts, or what's inside them. Believe me."
Erika's eyes narrowed.
"Then why didn't you tell me about this?"
Akira tried to defend himself.
"I was planning to! I even infected the feed with an auto-censor virus! I am innocent here!"
She grabbed his wrist anyway.
"You still hid it from me. You need to explain the whole looking-up-skirts thing. Come with me. Punishment."
Akira dug his heels in as she dragged him toward the door.
"Nooo! I am innocent! I have no interest in it! I have no interest in it—nooooooo!"
The door slammed behind them.
When class started, Akira returned to his seat with both cheeks visibly swollen.
The rest of the class looked at him.
Then, by silent agreement, nobody said a word about it.