The fading sounds of the rain seemd to disappear , I didn't know how long it was, when had I closed my eyes , his warmth that embraced me was no longer there and I felt somewhat empty as I slowly opened my eyes , I knew when his hands had left mine and I had felt him leave the bed but...he never left the room I knew he was still in the room but after everything that had happened I had let him see through me, I had barred myself and now.....I turned my head to the sound of light rain tapping the window , It seemed to have gotten louder , In the dim lighting I saw him just standing by the window looking out, I couldn't tellyhe expression he had on his face but he seemd so focused like he was looking forward to something.
What could I call this?, it seemed unreal, everything....seemed unreal , I wasn't doubting him, I never doubted him but...what if there was just that inkling of change, what if I notice a different expression from the ones I had seen , despite his assurance , his efforts, why did I feel conflicted , I should be happy, I keep telling myself that but why does it seem like one day I could just trip at my own pace , what if one day I will just end running away like I always did . I looked over at Denver who hadn't noticed that I was awake , to ke Denver seemed like a door, I could peep in and look, you could tell exactly what he feels but there is a catch...you have to be on glasses in other to see him clearly, compared to him I was just.....the peephole, my doors were barely opening and the only way you could get in is if you used the right key.
How could you summarise all that into, it was simple, Denver is the key and I am the peephole , despite some efforts my door is barely opening. I stood up and slowly walked up to Denver , he seemed to have noticed my presence as a small smile formed on his lips, " you're awake...?", his voice calm like always , I didn't answer him as I just walked closer to him and hugged him from the back and leaned my face unto his back , he didn't react, he seemed to have expected itas his hands met mine that was clinging to his waist and I feel how his hands played with my fingers or was he caressing them?, his hands somewhat calloused and somewhat cold felt warm as he played with them , the rain had not stopped falling so I couldn't tell if it was almost morning anytime soon, " what is it?", his tone was patient as he waited for me to speak , what did I want to say?, " Denver....can", I bit my lower lip trying to make sense of what was about to come out of my mouth, I sighed in defeat when I realized it could approximately come out wrong , " you don't want to....."," what do you think I want to do right now?", I asked not really expecting an answer but then he spoke , " what would you want to do right now.....Rhea?", he asked his tone laced with curiosity as if.....he knew, " I want to start writing again", it had come out blatantly rushed, almost like I had been wanting to blurt it out, there was a rare silence that seemed to exceed our normal range of silence , he turned to me finally , his gaze soft, just the way he always looked at me, " do want me to make that choice for you Rhea?", he took a step closer to me despite us already being close enough, his hands resting on my shoulder , I wasn't surprised by his answer ..., I knew it was something he could say but.....I still wanted to hear him say it. It all came to the fact it was my own decision to make...and I wanted to do it again.
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I remember when I was at my meet and greet , I was shocked to see people that were actually fans of my work, as I sat behind that white polished desk signing books and interacting with my fans, a little girl asked me a question , " why do you write?", that question seemed to strike me because .....she was a kid, what was I going to tell a kid?, would I tell her that it was to get revenge against my mother...obviously not, should I lie and say something else , if I say I enjoy writing I will just be lying to myself, to me writing was the only compensation God could give me for not fulfilling my other aspects in life, I had nosebleeds, headaches, back pains because of that same writing, it wasn't a hobby , it was just work and for my mother it was...vengeance. I remember being frozen mid sign as I looked at this cute kid wondering what I could say to her, how I could answer her as the mature adult but...all that I could say at that moment was , " I write to exist ", I said that with the biggest and most fake smile plastered on my face, I remembered how that kid looked at me with such admiration amd even have me a thumbs up, " then....I want yo be like you", she had said that, for the first time someone had said that they wanted to be like me and this overwhelming feeling seemed to envelop me , something warm that I felt like I was going to cry.
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MORNING
That morning Denver made something simple yet delicious as usual, toast with toppings of whipped cream, strawberry and maple syrup, coffee that smelled like heaven with a ton of sugar and cream, he sat opposite Rhea as they both dug in , the air barely lingering, it was clear that they both wanted to say something but they were just waiting for the other.
Rhea cleared her throat as she prepared to say something but then she looked at him and didn't even know what to say, she just wanted to....., she felt it, a soft brush of his finger against her lower lip , she had not seen coming and her mind suddenly drifted to what had almost happened between them last night, she could feel her cheeks turn different shades of red.
Denver wanted to smile at her reaction but ended up biting his lower lip to stifle it, he wanted to rase her more and right before her eyes , he licked his finger, the same finger her had used to rub her lip, " the cream is sweet", he said with a smirk, almost sensual, Rhea briskly looked away , he is so shameless , she thought , Denver then stood up and pulled his chair beside her, when she realized that that he was coming het way she turned her head to the other side so that she won't meet his gaze.
He was right beside her now and she felt that exploding warmth that she always felt when he was close to her, those tingling sensation and the fast beating of her heart , Denver smiled as he bent his head low to meet her gaze since she didn't want to look at at him but.....it was to no avail, " haa.....you don't want to look at me .....fine then", he muttered sounding sad as he leaned back unto his chair, Rhea could sense the change in his tone, was he angry?, did she take it too far?", she needed to clarify it, she quickly turned her head towards his direction, " Den...", but the, before she could comprehend it, his lips was on hers , at first it was light, she could feel her whole body surrender, he departed but their lips were still in contact, " Denver...", she said softly, he smirked before curving his hand softly around the back of her neck, pulling her in and fully claiming her lips with his, his lips grazing softly with hers with both warmth and intensity, she clenched her hand unto his shirt, as he angled his head pulling her in more,as he tapped open her mouth.
Then...he departed from her lips , Rhea was dazed for a while before closing her mouth with the back of her palm as she looked everywhere except from his face, " I.....I thought you said you wanted to take things slow", she mummured, still disoriented, Denver leaned in closer all of a sudden somewhat startling her, and an involuntary hiccup escaped her mouth, " but....can't we still kiss or...", his eyes scrolled slowly down to her lips seductively, his eyes somewhat dazed and tgat naughty smile appeared on his lips, the one he usually had when he had an ulterior motive, " do you have any other thing in mind...", "tsk.....you are shameless", she couldn't help but sputter, Denver chuckled as he leaned unto his chair.
After a short pause, " I'm not opening the resturant today....that means I have nothing to do and that also means.....", he turned his head towards her, watching her with somewhat eagerness, " I'm free today...", Rhea seemed to be hypnotised, then he leaned in again but this time it was expected, " are you also free today..., don't you...have anything planned.....", the way he spoke it was like he was nervous but still trying to cover it up with his smooth talk, " no....", Rhea replied back simplyas she awaited his next question, " then...would you...go on a date with me...", " a date?", for a second she had forgotten what a date was and when she had finally come back to her senses she realized that Denver was asking her on a date and she could feel her excitement build up, she cleared her throat as she tried to stop herself from smiling but Denver had already seen her, he couldn't help but smile backs he leaned unto his chair relieved , he already knew her answer.