"Dammit, these ropes won't budge! I've never done a breakout act in my life! Monkey!! Mitchi! Do something, I'm in a real bind here—!!"
"Good grief, stop thrashing around! As a fellow native of Koha-Ace, you're making me die of embarrassment!"
"What?! You—you traitors—!"
"Don't be such a nuisance. Keep this up and you'll lose your screen time."
"This is Fate, you fools! You're in the wrong genre—"
"Just go already. End this quickly."
"U-Umu! Right! My apologies! You apron-wearing cutting board!"
"I'm going to incinerate you, you damn brat!"
"...Was that really alright?"
"It's fine. This is the only scene we get, anyway."
The GudaGuda Civil War: The Decisive Battle for the Heavens!
"It's not over! The GudaGuda event doesn't end until I say so, you lot!!"
Hoisting the Holy Grail—now reshaped into a crude tea vessel—high into the air, Nobbu... or rather, Oda Nobunaga, let out a roar of pure, unadulterated ambition. Her voice pulsed with a commanding presence, carving into the hearts of everyone present a singular, terrifying certainty: she was about to do something reckless.
"What could you possibly be thinking, turning traitor now, Nobbu?! After all the Princess did to get us here, are you really going to throw it all away!?"
"Nobbuuu!! Onduru ragi-ttan desu ka—?! How could you betray us!?"
Faced with the condemnation of her allies, the Demon King simply brushed them off.
"It can't be helped!" she declared with a shrug.
Even the King of Heroes found himself questioning her resolve. "I told you I would forgive you if you weren't an enemy," Gilgamesh remarked. "I had a modicum of respect for that cleverness of yours—the way you prepared a gift for my arrival. But this... to call this a 'betrayal' is almost too childish to entertain. Still, I shall ask for form's sake. Is your rebellion against us truly your own will, Oda?"
"U-Umu... Oh dear, did I accidentally trip the 'Serious Mode' switch...?"
—I want to know the truth, Nobunaga! We're comrades who have shared the same GudaGuda fate! I can't accept this! Our farewell should be something everyone meets with a smile!
"She's speaking directly into my brain! —Fine! Behold my path of conquest! Let this mark the dawn of the new Era of Nobu!!"
With a thunderous declaration, Oda Nobunaga revealed her grand design—!
"I wanted to use the Grail to make the GudaGuda Space permanent! That way, I'll always be the Partner Servant! I'll always be the featured character! Every day will be a guaranteed Nobbu Victory! Eventually, as the 'Temple-Burning, Atsumori-Dancing Nobu,' I'd even hijack this very novel! It is a stroke of genius from the God of Nobu! I'm so much of a revolutionary, it's honestly scary!"
"A permanent GudaGuda event?! Unacceptable! Absolutely unacceptable! GudaGuda is only forgiven because it happens once in a while! A daily GudaGuda is just stagnation! We'd be branded with the stigma of being 'stale'! Think again, Nobbu!"
Nobunaga merely snorted at Okita's desperate plea.
"Precisely. That is why I will be the one who causes the incidents. Everything that happened in my life, the entirety of the warring Sengoku era—I shall use this Grail to recreate it all as a Singularity."
"What... did you say...?"
To recreate Nobunaga's life and era with the Grail, turning it into a massive "What If" scenario. By doing so, Nobunaga would be both the cause and the solution. Through this blatant "match-fixing," she would secure a starring role of unparalleled proportions.
It would be an event of the Nobu, by the Nobu, and for the Nobu. In other words—
"Yes!! The name of the True Singularity! That name is—!!"
[ NOBU-NOBU SENGOKU TURMOIL!! ]
Nobunaga sang out the name of the Singularity—which sounded remarkably underwhelming. As the crowd stood dumbfounded, Nobunaga began to laugh hysterically, completely ignoring the atmosphere.
"Bwahahaha!! Once this plan succeeds, unique hits will skyrocket two-million-fold! I'll be swimming in ten times the comments! A grand achievement that will leave my name shining forever in the halls of Hameln!"
"The author is definitely going to drop dead from overwork... Five or six hundred comments a day is way beyond what 'passion' or 'gratitude' can cover!"
"I couldn't care less! I'm not the one suffering! At the end of the day, it's someone else's problem! Whether the author gets tendonitis or the story goes on hiatus, I have zero emotional attachment to them!"
The group shuddered at Nobunaga's cold-blooded pragmatism.
"Wait! Something is overflowing from the Grail!"
As if responding to her hollow logic, formless black specters began to crawl out.
[ I'm... so strong... I'm the strongest... ]
[ No particular reason, but... I'm so popular... ]
[ No depth to my characterization... just a walking pile of stats... but I want praise... I want to be pampered... but setting up a story from scratch is too much work... ]
[ That's it... a stepping stone... Reincarnation... OC... Possession... just a footstool... ]
[[[ FOOTSTOOL! FOOTSTOOL! FOOTSTOOL! ANYTHING TO MAKE ME LOOK GOOD! DESTROY THE CHARACTER! SMASH THE CANON! I WILL REIGN SUPREME!! ]]]
They were the negative dregs of creation. The embodiment of hideous, dark desires born without respect, ignoring constraints, and lacking gratitude—!
"Wait for me, you restless dead! I shall soon give you a stage... as my nourishment!"
Nobunaga drew power from the loathsome spirits summoned by her wish. Clad in the grudges born from the worst truths of the internet, she reigned supreme.
"You're wrong!"
Rikka, the Master, threw down a defiant "No!"
"This story has come this far because everyone—Gil, the Princess, everyone—shone in their own way! Doing a 'solitary power trip' in this story is just wrong!"
"You deny me, Rikka Fujimaru?! Then it can't be helped! You shall rot here and become a foundation for Nobu's glory!"
"Nobbu, stop! I'll get the event items, I promise! I'll Max-Level you! I'll Max-NP you! So drop this stupid idea and come back—!!"
"Shut up, shut up, shut up!! I... I want to be the protagonist!!"
"Nobbu..."
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