"NOW!!! FOR THE MAIN ITEM OF TONIGHT'S AUCTION!!!!
THE LEGENDARY, FLORIDIAN PHILOSOPHER'S STONE!!!"
*CLAP* *CLAP* *CLAP* *CLAP* *CLAP* *CLAP* *CLAP* *CLAP* *CLAP* *CLAP* *CLAP* *CLAP* *CLAP* *CLAP* *CLAP* *CLAP*
With the thunderous claps of the auction attendees, a cart was wheeled onto the stage with a red jewel on it. It doesn't take a genius to understand just how special that red jewel is. The aura it radiates could even tempt Saints and Saintesses alike.
The auctioneer then explains the background of the red jewel.
The legend said that in the past, there was a massive wizard war in Florida. It was one of the worst wizard wars ever recorded in history. A surviving diary recalled the harrowing experience of one of its fighters.
"Shit man, this wizard war is fucked. I just saw a guy clap his hands together and say 'the ten hells' or some similar shit, and everyone around him turned inside out, had their tibia explode, and then disappeared. The camera didn't even go onto him, that's how common shit like this is. My ass is casting frostbite and level 2 poison. I think I just heard 'power word: scrunch' two groups over. I gotta get the fuck outta here."
Of course, the fate of the writers is known to all of the wizards in the war. The mastermind who controls all sides of the war uses the war to gather all of the wizards in such a small area and then sacrifice all of them to create a philosopher's stone.
What came of it was the Floridian Philosopher's Stone.
A philosopher's stone is used to enhance one's magic. With the law of Equivalent Exchange, an appropriate amount of mana would need to be used to perform magic. You couldn't pull off a 100-mana-point magic with 10 mana points.
A philosopher's stone goes around that restriction by sacrificing the soul trapped inside the stone as mana. This is how a philosopher stone enhances the wearer's magic.
But this philosopher's stone contains the soul of Floridians. Due to Floridians' nature, the Floridian philosopher's stone also changed the magic to random bullshit. This is how the first wearer of the Floridian Philosopher Stone died. His small fireball turned into a thermobaric nuclear bomb.
"Are the preparations ready?"
"It would be arrogant to answer your question with a 'yes', Major. This is the Kaito Kid we are dealing with."
"Thought so…"
"NOW!! LET US OPEN WITH THE INITIAL BID OF THREE MILLION YEN!!!"
*BZZZT–POP*
"What the?!?! The lights!?!"
*SHIK!!*
"Huh?! Ice?!?!"
When the lights suddenly explode and wrap the room in total darkness, a mass of ice suddenly forms around the jewel and encapsulates it thoroughly.
"Quick work, Enlist Ramonu."
"I came prepared."
*BAAAAAM*
"So does our guest."
While it looks like the situation is already under control, the ice suddenly erupts and sends minuscule particles of ice all over the theater.
*BBBZZZZZMMMM*
"Ladies~~~ I hope you have been well tonight~~"
In the midst of confusing darkness, a floodlight suddenly turned on and lit up a man in white standing in the middle of the stage. Long white top hat and white monocle. Anyone who has been keeping up with the news would know who this man is.
"I am Kaito Kid!!! The one and only Gentleman Thief!!"
"HE IS HERE FOR THE JEWEL!!!
CATCH HIM!!"
"Oh my~~~ I'm so happy to be so popular!!!"
"WE CAN KEEP HIM IN THE BASEMENT LIKE THE REST OF THEM!!!"
"I think I just heard something horrifying."
The security guards hurriedly swarm the stage to capture the thief. But alas, they were no match against the professional thief.
"Whoah~~ All of you are so eager!!"
"Make space."
*SHIK!!*
"Whopp! My~ My~~ The rumors don't do justice to your beauty, Mejiro Ramonu."
"Apologies, but I'm taken."
In an instant, a birdcage made out of ice formed around Kaito Kid and reached toward the sky. The thickness of the ice would make it impossible for the captured to break it with his own hands.
"Nothing personal, but I need that jewel."
"Fufufu~~ So does my client."
"And who is this client of yours?"
"Luckily for you, he will grace us with his presence!!!
Now, please welcome our second actor for tonight's show!!!!"
*BAAAAAAM*
The ceiling above Kaito Kid suddenly burst in a massive explosion. Debris rains down in massive chunks onto the ice birdcage and destroys it effortlessly.
With the explosive entrance, a second man entered the scene wearing a red tailcoat suit and red pants. He does not wear a top hat like his partner, but he does wear a red and gold ball mask.
[Uma Siren] is activated.
"Greetings, my lovely ladies~~
The thief of passion grazes you with his presence~~
Kneel before me, and I shall grant you a night full of passion~~"
"Kuh!!"
Every umamusume in the room kneels on the ground at the command of the passion thief. They don't understand, but the passion thief's voice fills their hearts with unconditional love for him. It's to the point that they are willing to let him escape with the jewel.
"Fufufu~~ Good girls~~ I love obedient girls~~"
*Thwip*
From the passion thief's wrist, a hook with rope shot into the broken ceiling, and it managed to catch onto something firm above. Using said rope, the 2 thieves begin their ascent to their freedom.
"For my last gift, I shall give you a good night kiss.
Smooch~~"
*Drop*
The passion thief's sweet action causes most of the umamusumes to pass out from excitement. The urge to make love with him is countered by the urge to follow his order to kneel. This battle of spirit breaks their body and causes most of them to pass out.
"You weren't kidding when you said you knew how to neutralize them."
"Anything to get my hand on that jewel."
The 2 thieves casually talk after they climb out of the amphitheater. With most of the threats neutralized by the passion thief, the number of people that could pose a threat to them could be counted on one hand.
"Our agreement said that I would need to inspect it first before giving it to you."
"Fine by me. How are you going to do that then? I'm going to need that this week."
"Don't worry, it won't take that long. I just need to look at the moon through it."
The passion thief doesn't understand what information Kaito Kid could gather from such a simple act, but he lets him have his way with the Floridian Philosopher Stone. Kaito Kid brings the jewel near his eye and lifts it toward the moon.
"Hmm…"
"Anything troublesome?"
"For me, but not for you."
With a disappointed voice, the Gentleman Thief threw the jewel at his partner.
"This is not the jewel that I'm searching for. You can keep it. I don't want anything to do with something so evil."
"Great. You can go home now, Sebastian."
"Heh! It's Kaito, sir."
The 2 thieves parted ways with a knowing smile. The white one jumped out of a window, letting the night's wind carry him and his paraglider away. The red one looked up at his partner's silhouette, which grew smaller until he became one with the many stars in the night sky.
"You could've asked me if you wanted it, you know?"
"Ooh~~?? I'm surprised you could get up, Ramonu."
True to his words, he wasn't expecting Ramonu to approach him. The young man had used his [Uma Siren] to its maximum potential, and all of the umamusumes should be kneeling down there until he released them. So he was being genuine when he said he was surprised upon seeing Ramonu climbing on an ice tower of her own making.
"I don't want people to get suspicious of you. This thing is as evil as me, you know? It fits me more than anyone else."
"As if I care what others think of me.
So what are you gonna do with it?"
"I would be going to America first. I had a feeling this would come in handy there.
Considering who I'll be going with."