"How could you treat Professor Lockhart like that!"
On the way back from the hospital wing after dropping Lockhart off, Hermione had been incessantly nagging and berating Kyle for his "impolite behavior" during Defense Against the Dark Arts class.
Of course, her criticism was limited strictly to his lack of manners.
At the very least, she had finally seen through Lockhart's facade as an incompetent fraud and no longer attempted to defend his honor.
Kyle wore a professional "customer service" smile, putting on an air of "you're absolutely right, but I'm not listening."
"Yeah, yeah, you're right... sure, sure..."
Standing beside them, Hannah felt like she was developing calluses on her ears from listening to their circular, pointless conversation.
Helplessly, she reached out and clapped a hand over Hermione's mouth. "But it did let us see Lockhart's true colors, didn't it?"
Fortunately, the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom was only on the second floor of the castle. Lockhart, having flown out the window, had only suffered a broken leg.
If losing to Kyle could be dismissed as the Professor "taking it easy" on a student during a duel, then what happened next was truly beyond words.
Lockhart had attempted to use magic to heal his own broken leg, only to end up vanishing every single bone in that leg instead. There were simply no fucks left to give about that level of incompetence.
It was terrifyingly bad.
Normally, a minor injury like a fracture could be handled in under three minutes by Kyle—who served as both the Hufflepuff Quidditch team's medic and a Beater. If it were Hannah, it would have taken even less time; she could have fixed Lockhart's leg in under a minute.
But now, Lockhart wouldn't be leaving the hospital wing for at least ten days to a fortnight.
When Snape arrived on the scene after hearing the commotion, the "Old Bat"—who never smiled—actually allowed a heartfelt, knowing smirk to cross his face.
Lockhart being bedridden meant the position of substitute DADA professor would fall to him once again.
The news that Kyle had effectively kicked Gilderoy Lockhart into the hospital wing spread through Hogwarts like wildfire. By dinner time, practically the entire school knew.
Dumbledore didn't summon Kyle to the Headmaster's office for a lecture on morality, and all the Heads of Houses turned a blind eye, acting as if nothing had happened.
Over at the Hufflepuff table, George and Fred Weasley were pounding on the table like madmen.
"Why do you always have to give the Defense Against the Dark Arts professors a hard time?!"
"This is the third one you've sent packing!"
Kyle rolled his eyes helplessly. "Is it my fault?"
Who could have guessed that Lockhart, with a reputation that reached the heavens, couldn't even take a single kick? To think Kyle had even pulled out his Two-Way Mirror before the duel started, ready to unleash a Summoning-type Forbidden Curse.
The twins leaned in with unfriendly expressions, each grabbing one side of Kyle's neck in a playful chokehold.
"It's all because of you! Now Snape is the substitute teacher again!" George wailed. "It's only the first day of term!"
"Speaking of which," Cedric interjected, narrowing his eyes, "weren't you two involved with the first two professors as well?"
The first, Tom Hiddleston, had been jumped in the Forbidden Forest by the combined efforts of Snape, the twins, and Kyle; he was in Azkaban by the next day.
The second, Quirinus Quirrell, had engaged in a back-and-forth battle with the four "Banes of their Elders" in the Forbidden Forest before Dumbledore finished him off.
Compared to his predecessors—one in Azkaban and one reduced to ashes—Lockhart was actually quite lucky to have only lost the bones in one leg.
George and Fred instantly let go of Kyle's neck.
Fred gave a sheepish laugh. "That... well, that was self-defense."
"Right, right, pure self-defense," George added, nodding furiously.
Kyle, who had been strangled for quite a while, suddenly stood up and delivered a swift hand-chop to both of their heads.
"If you keep whining at me, I'll go to the hospital wing tonight and finish Lockhart off myself, just so Snape can teach you for the rest of the year!"
Hearing Kyle's threat, George and Fred nearly dropped to their knees in supplication.
Hermione and Hannah sighed helplessly. Everyone else might take that as a joke, but they both felt it was exactly the kind of thing Kyle was capable of doing. After all, he had a criminal record for this sort of thing.
"Don't be like that, Boss Kyle," George said with a cheeky grin.
The twins instantly transformed into total sycophants, shamelessly flattering him while massaging his legs and shoulders.
"Fine, fine. Go eat your dinner."
Kyle irritably pushed the two shameless boys away, sending them back to the Gryffindor table.
After dinner, Kyle knocked on the door to Snape's office.
While Snape had been dealing with the Lockhart situation earlier that afternoon, he had told Kyle to come by his office tonight. Kyle wasn't quite sure what the man wanted to discuss.
The door opened shortly after, and Kyle was met with Snape's perpetual "stone-faced" expression. Even though Kyle had helped him get rid of Lockhart and secured him the substitute DADA spot, Snape's face didn't soften in the slightest.
Kyle was used to it, though.
"Sit," Snape said, gesturing to a chair in front of his desk before he began casting charms around the room.
"Protego Maxima, Salvio Hexia, Fianto Duri, Muffliato..."
Kyle's expression grew serious as he watched Snape layer one defensive spell after another. It seemed Snape had something incredibly important to say.
After finishing the preparations, Snape walked quickly to a storage cabinet. He deactivated the locking enchantments and carefully pulled out a dusty, nondescript box.
"I found the item you mentioned."
Snape opened the box, revealing an ancient ring set with a black, diamond-shaped stone.
"The Resurrection Stone? You actually found it?" Kyle reached out to pick it up.
Snape slapped Kyle's hand away. "Do not touch it blindly. It carries a powerful curse."
Hearing this, Kyle drew his wand from his sleeve and gave the ring a poke. A surge of malevolent black energy immediately erupted from the ring.
"That is indeed a potent curse." He looked up at Snape. "You want me to help you lift it?"
To be precise, he wanted the person behind Kyle to help lift it.
Snape closed the box and pushed it toward Kyle. "I would like to request Lord Grindelwald's assistance. Dumbledore must not know about this."
Ever since Kyle had been whisked away from Hogsmeade that one time, Snape had known that Grindelwald had quietly returned to the stage. He also knew exactly why Dumbledore and Grindelwald had originally parted ways. If Dumbledore found out about the Resurrection Stone, the chances of Snape ever getting it back were slim to none.
"Name your price."
A faint smile played on Kyle's lips. It was always easier to do business with smart people—no need for excessive small talk.
"Five bottles of Strength Potion."
Snape's face darkened instantly. Even for a "shakedown," this was excessive.
The Strength Potion was a brew that permanently increased the drinker's physical strength and provided a degree of bodily fortification, though its primary effect was raw power. A key ingredient was the blood of a Re'em. While drinking Re'em blood provided a temporary massive boost in strength, refining it into a potion made that effect permanent.
Due to the rarity of Re'em blood and the difficulty of its brewing process—not to mention the rarity of the other auxiliary ingredients—a single bottle of Strength Potion was worth its weight in Felix Felicis.
"One bottle," Snape countered.
Kyle shook his head; that wasn't how you haggle. He pushed the box containing the Resurrection Stone ring back.
"Two bottles," Snape offered, pushing the ring back again.
"Five bottles. I can provide the Re'em blood."
No matter how Snape tried to bargain, Kyle held firm at five.
The Strength Potion was like the Magic Enhancement Potion; a wizard could only benefit from it once in their lifetime. Kyle planned to drink one himself and give one to Hagrid. As for the remaining three...
Since he intended to mold little Hannah into the style of a certain "Legendary Sucker" (the Fifth Hokage), one of those three would definitely be reserved for her.
The last two would be distributed as needed.
His Konan was currently developing "Paper Release" magic based on his suggestions; since she didn't focus on melee combat, she didn't need this stuff. Perhaps he could give them to Dumbledore and Grindelwald, so those two frail old men would have more strength when they inevitably fought each other.
In the end, Snape had no choice but to agree. Of course, he added his own conditions.
"In addition to double the amount of Re'em blood, I want five Occamy eggs."
"No problem." Occamy eggs were easy enough to... acquire from old man Newt next door. Kyle agreed without hesitation.
(Newt: Where are your manners? Do you even have a mother?)
Kyle pushed the box back to Snape.
"Keep it here for now. Give it to me at Christmas."
Kyle explained, "I'll personally take this back to my father then. You wouldn't feel comfortable sending this via Owl Post anyway, would you?"
Snape said nothing, merely pulling the box back and stowing it away, which served as silent agreement.
"Well then, Professor, see you later. Pleasure doing business with you."
Kyle turned to leave the gloomy dungeon office, but after taking a step, he stopped.
"Er... Professor, could you open the door for me?"
After Kyle left, Snape stared blankly at the box containing the Resurrection Stone.
"Lily... we will be meeting again very soon."
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