Done a Runner by fantasyra Books »
A secret romance, a bothersome Headmaster, and angry Parents. What are two teens madly in love going to do when push comes to shove and everyone in the world is trying to keep them apart? Expect Bashing, Explicit content, and a wild ride.
Harry Potter Rated: M, English, Romance & Adventure, Harry P., Hermione G., Words: 158k+, Favs: 3k+, Follows: 4k+, Published: Apr 15, 2010 Updated: Aug 25, 2013
Chapter 1: Done a Runner
From his vantage atop the Astronomy Tower the whole of creation seemed to be laid before him. Usually such views afforded him a sense of peace and wonder. Today however the beautiful vista was lost on him. Though Harry's eyes looked out ward, he didn't see. All his attention was inward on lost dreams, current events, and Hermione.
He could feel the sobs threatening to break through; when he spoke, he hoped she would not hear it. "I love you so much…"
He felt her clutch tighter to him. Of course she knew. She always did. He held back his tears and held his lover close to him. Many nights before now found them sharing the same sleeping space but not engaging in activities.
She was the balm to the wounds of his soul. She held him, whispering her love into his ear until he fell asleep, exhausted from shedding tears. She never spoke of it outside the dark confines of her bed curtains. She never alluded to these events. Like a taboo, she never mentioned his weakness. He would only allow himself to show it to her. He trusted only her.
"I love you too Harry…" She softly whispered into his ear. Harry laid himself on his side as she snuggled into his chest.
"Me and you Hermione. Always and forever." His voice barely a whisper, but his words were spoken from the deepest recesses of his heart.
She whispers into his chest with just as much feeling. "Me and you Harry, Always love, forever and more."
Harry snapped out of the memory. Ahead of him the sun was setting in the distance, sending blood red streaks and yellows as far as the eye could see. It had been a week since the battle at the Department of Mysteries where he had been led into a trap to rescue his Godfather, Sirius Black. A rescue mission that had failed since his Godfather had died anyways. It was all a trap set to have Harry retrieve a Prophecy from that department for Voldemort.
Harry led five others with him on the rescue that almost cost him far more than he could have ever imagined going into it. They all survived, thankfully but it was truly a near thing. Ron, Ginny, Luna, and even Neville wouldn't be walking away from this with the marks to prove it.
Then there was what happened to Hermione. She had been grievously injured. Harry had thanked every light deity out there that Madam Pomfrey was able to reverse the curse that had struck her down. Harry did not want to live in a world where Hermione was not a part of it. He couldn't. He wouldn't.
"But she's going to be okay, Pomfrey said so…" Harry muttered to the wind that raced past him. Words made seem to make it more real and Harry clung to them tightly.
Afterward Dumbledore decided to finally tell Harry what made him so special to Voldemort. Harry snorted remembering the rain of destruction he had unleashed on the old man's office in the wake of that little bit of news. Dumbledore had perfect timing. Yeah, sure, take an emotionally fragile teen and tell him it's kill or be killed after he gets his friends injured, his Godfather killed, his arse reamed because they were way too under-skilled to be playing with the big boys. Yup, perfect timing. In light of everything, he thought he took it rather well, though he doubted Bumbledore thought so, considering he had yet to repair any of the things Harry had broken in his rage.
It was not the prophecy that bothered him. Not really. Deep down inside, Harry had always known that he was marked for death, or at the very least, marked to face down Riddle in the end. No, that did not bother him. His Godfather dying bothered him a great deal. He would, and did, miss Sirius, fiercely. However the thing that bothered him the most was Hermione getting hurt. Being under Voldemort's Cruciatus curse didn't hurt as deeply as seeing her broken body. Her blood staining her clothes as her skin grew paler. Her breath almost nonexistent… The image didn't just steal his will to fight, it murdered it. The thought of her dead… no description of pain could do it justice.
He should have been faster, stronger, or something. Harry sighed feeling his shoulders drop. He wasn't though, not by a long shot. He was nowhere near where he wanted to be in order to protect her and that was a bitter pill to swallow.
Then as if that wasn't enough, because of her injuries, Dumbledore had brought in Hermione's parents. Hermione had told him yesterday they were going to pull her from Hogwarts. They were going to move.
'Course, that was after the Headmaster saw fit to inform her parents about the Troll in her first year, Polyjuice and petrifaction her second year, soul-sucking Dementor's her third year, the escaped criminal who posed as an instructor her fourth year, and finally, Umbitch, the Mighty Toad Twat herself this year. Dumbledore also made sure to list the numerous assaults she had suffered through all five years and exactly how many times she had been sent to the Hospital wing as a result of her affiliation with Harry.
Harry chuckled darkly, glazed eyes turning to the Black Lake Oh yeah, let's not forget that he had told them all about Harry. How trouble had a way of finding him. How he was often in the middle of dangerous things. How Harry always seemed to drag her along on his 'adventures'. The stone, rescuing Sirius, and finally the Battle at the D.O.M. Stupid-cock-blocking-goat-fucker.
Harry hadn't even been introduced properly to her parents yet, and they already thought him some deranged lunatic bent on getting himself killed. If he kept having ties to their daughter, he would get her killed too. In one meeting with the Grangers, Dumbledore had managed to destroy the image they had of him from Hermione's letters home.
Harry could handle them not liking him. He could take them hating him. But what truly burned his arse was Dumbledore made Hermione cry. She had cried when she informed him that her parents when she got home she was forbidden to have anything to do with Harry. No post, no phone calls, nothing. For her 'Greater Good', they were moving far from England, and as far as she was concerned, Harry Potter no longer existed.
Hermione was crushed. He had never seen her as distraught as when she told him those things. Harry had confronted the Headmaster hours after he finished talking with Hermione. He was told it was for his own good; he had enough to be going on with. Dumbledore told him, if he truly cared for Hermione, Harry would let her go where she would be safe. That conversation led him here, to top of the astronomy tower watching the sunset and thinking.
As far as Harry was concerned, the Headmaster had gone too far this time. He was trying to separate Harry from the only thing that made his life worth living. Without Hermione, he would never have gotten through Snape's mind raping lesions concealed as teaching Occlumency. Without Hermione, Harry would have never known love. Without Hermione, Harry had nothing to live for. As far as Harry was concerned, only one person had the power to end his relationship with Hermione, and that was Hermione. Harry closed his eyes from the stunning scene before him to calm himself down. If he kept working himself up like this there was every chance he would end up in Azkaban before the sun fully set.
"Hermione…" Harry whispered to himself painfully. Thoughts of his lover always calmed him down.
Harry had noticed he had strange feelings for Hermione third year. He did what he could to ignore them. He didn't understand them but what they did to him told him that if he gave into them something would happen. Things would change. Harry had no idea what that change would be but there was no way he was going to risk losing her over some stupid feelings, so he clamped down on them. Hard.
However, a few months through Fourth year, just before his name came out of that blasted cup, it became too much. He had pulled her aside and asked her what the hell it was. It was driving him mental. He couldn't figure any of it out. He never felt anything like them before, and it scared him. Worse, they were getting impossible to ignore and he shamefully lost his temper with her a few times before he caved in and talked to her about it. It was very awkward but he had pulled her aside that night and asked her to not laugh at him. He needed to know what it was. He then explained to her what they felt like hoping she could help him, praying that the change he feared wouldn't happen and driver her out of his life. Hermione didn't laugh, and thankfully she didn't leave. No, she cried.
At first he thought they were bad feelings. He cursed himself and his weak self-control and apologized to her telling her he never meant to hurt her. He confessed it felt like knives piercing his chest flaying him to see her in tears and be the reason for it. Thankfully she started trying to explain before he worked himself much more. It was hard for her because even though he understood the concepts of emotional attachment, the idea of love, it had never occurred to him he might be in love with his best friend.
Harry asked her if it was okay if they explored it. Despite the way they made him feel sometimes, he liked them, overall, and the idea of being in love Hermione gave him all kinds of great feelings. The change he feared ultimately became his salvation.
At first, they took it slow after 'the talk', as they ended up privately referring to it. It was easy, really easy, especially after his name came out of the cup. Everyone shunned him. They took walks around the lake. They talked about themselves, sharing themselves with each other in deeper ways than they ever did before. Harry discovered she was just as lonely as he was, though she had a better home life than he did.
Then, just before the first task, he had discovered how to get into the Girls' Dorms. That night was the first night they shared a bed, though nothing had happened. Well, nothing sexual. It was the night of their first kiss. It was the first night Harry broke down and cried in front of another living soul. The first night Hermione heard him speak about his life outside of Hogwarts. She held him close. She whispered to him that he was not alone; she was there for him. She promised she always would be.
Harry opened his eyes, pulling away from thoughts of those nights. The sun had fully set, which meant it was time. He continued thinking as he turned from the beautiful sunset and robotically made his way to the Hospital wing.
Harry spent most nights thereafter in her bed. He would sneak in through the hidden elf tunnels that catacomb the castle walls. A neat trick that Dobby had shown him and was apparently forgotten about by everyone but the little guys who used them.
Dobby had told him they led everywhere throughout the castle. All through Fourth year, Harry snuck in and snuck out. Her dorm mates never found out, or if they did, they never told. She only snuck into his room once. Ron's snoring drove her barmy and she playfully yet firmly told him she wasn't going to do it again.
After the first task, and Harry almost getting killed by that bloody dragon, it started to become a routine. Harry would come to Hermione; she would hold him and tell him that everything would be okay. Harry had never slept better. He never suffered nightmares when he was with her. Never tossed and turned. Harry had never known such dreamless sleep without a potion until they started this.
Some nights, Hermione would be the one crying to him. She would tell him all about her time before Hogwarts, how she was friendless, how hard it was to relate to people her own age because of her intelligence and pure need to know more about everything. How she felt like an outcast, the strange things that happened to her and people around her. How utterly alone she was until that fateful night, Halloween when a twelve-foot mountain troll had tried to kill her, and she was rescued by a scrawny, black-haired boy she barely knew.
The stone corridors of Hogwarts rolled past him never intruding deeper into his mind than was necessary to navigate the castle. It was thanks to Rita Skeeter's articles in the Daily Prophet that convinced them they needed to keep their relationship a secret. She had received some hexed mail and was hurt by it. After that, they toned themselves down in the public eye, but continued in private.
The nightly visits became more frequent. Hell, Harry hardly slept in his own bed, and he really hadn't since the beginning of that year. But, because of the attacks on her when people only thought they were dating. It was necessary. They had both felt badly that she had led on Victor Krum the way she had, but in the end, it had all worked out. She went as his date; Harry had to take somebody and ended up taking Parvati Patil, who enjoyed being seen on his arm. However, after the first dance, Harry would only dance with Hermione, and he had only enjoyed two dances. They had had a great time until Ron started his 'woe is me' garbage.
The second task was, looking back, hilarious. Thanks to Dobby and the Gillyweed, he had gotten for him, Harry had gotten to the hostages way before anyone else had. He was half-way to the surface with Hermione before Krum had found them. Once Krum had taken her, Harry went back for Ron and rescued him and Fleur's sister Gabrielle. Krum had confronted both of them later about it, and they had told him a little bit about them seeing each other and why it was a secret.
Instead of being angry the Quidditch star laughed at them, telling them that they should have told him, he would have helped more. They were both relieved by his stance. Krum had told them, he understood. His own fiancée, a Bulgarian heiress of some kind, was also a secret that no one knew about. It was why he had asked Hermione to the Ball. She was not a crazy fan girl, nor would she stalk him later when he would have to break it off. His heart was already taken he had said. Like Harry, he didn't want anyone to get wind of their relationship for her safety. Suddenly, having a secret romance felt a bit better. Knowing others out there had similar problems and came to similar conclusions helped alleviate some of the stress it posed on them.
The night before the final task Hermione had confessed her love for him. She had made it a point that he should not feel pressured into telling her the same thing unless he felt the same way. Harry snorted to himself as he stalked through the Entrance Hall.
Harry had to have her explain how she felt to him before he could say anything one way or the other. She told him how she felt. How she thought about him all the time, how she ached to hold him at night. The few nights she didn't have Harry in her bed, she couldn't sleep for missing him, thinking about him. All kinds of things she told him to describe her feelings. She opened her heart to him in emotional whispers while they hid in the shadows of the stands. When she was done it was then that Harry understood he was truly in love, in love with his best friend. He confessed his love for her too.
Of course, then there was the third task itself to survive before he could go back to where he belonged. Her arms. The maze, Graveyard, facing Voldemort, Cedric dying, all of it. No one could move Hermione from his side in the hospital wing where he was recuperating. Dumbledore tried.
The old man even went as far as to escorted her all the way to Gryffindor tower and told the portrait of the Fat Lady Hermione was not allowed out for the night. Dobby had brought her back to him within seconds. When the Headmaster had come back into the Hospital Wing, he found her cuddled up to his side, holding him defiantly. Harry never remembered ever seeing the Headmaster's face ever being that shade of Mt. Vernon Puce.
Once again, he dragged Hermione back to the tower. However, this time he had McGonagall take her all the way to her dorm. This time when Dobby had brought Hermione back, he did so with Harry's invisibility cloak. Of course, Madam Pomfrey knew, but she never told. Harry was always grateful to the Medi-Witch for running interference so when the Headmaster came in Hermione had time to disappear. Harry had been touched when she even refused to attend classes to stay by his side.
Finally entering the last stretch to his destination Harry reminisced on the last year.
Harry's smile, and his good humor, died a painful death as Harry found himself in front of the doors to the Hospital wing. He leaned against the doors listening and waiting. Hermione was due to be release soon, and he was going to get the answer to his question. That answer would decide how the rest of his life would play out. Harry threw his invisibility cloak over himself and waited once more venturing into his own mind recalling that conversation…
Harry was sitting next to Hermione, holding her close. She was almost inconsolable.. She had, only moments ago, told him what her parents had said, what they had decided, and what was going to happen.
"Love…" Harry said as she finally had started to gain some control and calm down. "What if…" He licked his dry lips and took a deep breath. It was crazy, it was insane. It was also all he could think of. "What if we did a runner?"
He felt her shift as she turned to look up at him. A slight frown gracing her tear-streaked face. "What are you talking about Harry?"
Harry reached up and wiped her tears away with his thumb. "Me and you dear heart, always and forever right?" She nodded. "What if we just ran for it? Run away from England, got away from Dumbledore, Hogwarts, Voldemort, and your parents? We could just go underground, disappear."
"Harry, how would we live? We need to eat, need to sleep, what about our education?"
Harry nodded his head. "I know. Okay, the important thing first, our education." Here she smiled at him slightly shaking her head at his antics. It was the first smile to grace her face since he had come in to find her so beside herself. "There is a whole world out there waiting for us. I read somewhere that when Wizards and Witches graduated they used to take this tour of the world. Go out, see new things. Meet new Wizards and Witches, explore other cultures. We've done our O.W.L.S., we don't truly need N.E.W.T.s. We'll go see the world. I bet we would learn more doing this than we will in this castle. Seriously love, this castle is going to get one of us killed sooner or later. I'd rather not push my luck any more than I have to."
"As far as food and lodgings go, we bail out of here, hit Gringotts and empty my Trust fund vault. You would not believe how much gold is in there. We can get the goblins to convert it into normal money, mostly, and with our pockets full we just go."
Hermione stared at him blinking at what he said. In a measured voice she asked, "Okay, I'll play along. What about Voldemort Harry? He'll find us. So will Dumbledore. We can't hide forever from them."
Harry sighed looking away from her piercing brown eyes. "I know dear heart. I know they will try. If we stay here Voldemort will find us anyways. All he has to do is catch us in Hogsmeade during a weekend. Hell, even the castle isn't safe with Malfoy and the other little Death Nibblers about."
Harry looked back into her eyes, those cinnamon eyes he loved so much. "As far as Dumbledore goes, I don't trust him to have my best interest at heart anyways. He's worse than Voldemort in a way. At least Voldemort has been honest about wanting me dead."
"Neither of us really believes in prophecy or divination, but Dumbledore and Voldemort do. Both of those wankers are like two dogs fighting over a bone. I am tired of being that bone. I am not saying we don't come back, I am saying we come back when we know more. Think what we could learn out there. You are always telling me that knowledge is power. I learned long ago not to ignore what you have to say."
"You didn't agree with me going to the Ministry. We both thought it was a trap. We did everything we could think of to find out for sure if it was or wasn't. We got out-played. In the ministry, we got out dueled. I don't want anything to happen to you again, I am not strong enough, and not fast enough to protect you love. It kills me to know I can't."
"Oh Harry, it wasn't your fault. It was my stupid mistake that got me cursed. I never thought he could cast silently."
"That's my point. There is just no way around it. They're better than we are. Look at that fight; I know for a fact I stunned at least five of them. I am willing to bet my Firebolt you matched me stun for stun, bind for bind. They just kept reviving their people while throwing curses we couldn't fight. We played with kid gloves. They played with fire. You getting hurt showed me how much we are not ready for this war, yet we are somehow in the center of it. We have been since we were eleven. That's why I say let's just go, disappear."
He could tell he was reaching her but Hermione still argued, "How are we going to do that Harry, they'll track us if we move by magical means, and there are some Wizards and Witches in the Ministry who do understand a lot about normal modes of transportation. Not to mention, we don't have passports, visas, identification, and even if we did, it will just make them easier to track us. Harry, you're fifteen going to be sixteen in a few months; I'll be seventeen in September, no inns or lodgings will let us rent rooms at our ages. I've traveled with Mum and Dad a lot over the years, and you almost need to have a credit card to do anything. We're too young for that kind of thing. Even if we did have that available, again, it just makes it easier to track us. Don't get me started on the language barrier."
Her arguments were well-reasoned, but Harry had expected nothing less. "I actually had a couple of ideas about that. However, it requires a little bit of fraud, grand theft auto, and possibly some larceny. Other than that, it's mostly legal."
Hermione narrowed her eyes at him. "Very funny Harry, I am not joking."
Harry had a completely serious look on his face when he replied. "Nor am I. Me and you love. Nothing else matters. Think about it. Madam Pomfrey said she'll be letting you out tomorrow. I'll be outside in my cloak. Tell me your answer then. I do have some ideas on what we can do, but first we have to get away from the castle. Luckily, I have a plan."
"Think on it, love. I don't want to pressure you, but it's the only thing I can think of we can do where we can still be together. Dumbledore turned your parents against me. They think I am the devil's spawn now. I don't want to lose you… You know how much you mean to me. Run with me and we can be together. We've always watched each other's backs before. This won't be any different. We'll see the world, learn loads of new things, and if you want, we'll come back ready and able to handle our own for once."
"If…if you don't want to do this I will understand. I won't think badly of you. I will always love you no matter which choice you make. Even if it takes me a hundred years to find you again, I will, if I can." Harry left unsaid that the only thing that would stop him would be his death. She understood though. She always did.
Hermione was quiet for a while as she laid her head against his chest. He would not have caught it he had not been listing for her to say something. "What about Mum and Dad Harry? It'll crush them if I run away."
"Do you want my honest opinion, love?" he felt her nod against him. He rested his chin on the top of her head as he replied. "Honestly, if it's a matter of being with you or without you there really is no choice for me. You are more important than anything or anyone to me. Yes, it will crush your parents if you run with me, and I have no doubt they will hate me for all time, no matter the outcome. I will always worship your parents as greater deities, magical or mundane, for bringing you into this world, bringing you to me. I have been so blessed to have you in my life. I can't even think what it would be like without you. That said, for me, no cost is too great to have you in my life."
Harry kissed the top of her head as he got up to leave. "No matter your choice love, I will respect it and love you regardless. All I ask is to think about it, okay?"
Hermione's voice brought him out of his reverie.
"Two more weeks of potions, three times a day. I will make sure my parents know. Thank you again Madam Pomfrey."
"I am sorry, dear, about Albus. I do hope things change and we can see you here next year."
"I doubt it Madam. My parents seemed pretty adamant, and Headmaster Dumbledore already handed me my school termination papers." Harry noted Hermione's voice as neutral, no emotion at all. "Is there anything else? The Professor said I was to be taken home once I pack my things."
"No child. Take your potions, and you'll be fine. I packed a few extras just in case, if anything changes from the treatments or you develop any symptoms of note, go straight to St. Mungo's or whichever magical hospital you are closest to, first thing."
"Thank you, I will remember that."
Harry moved away from the door and watched as Hermione walked out and closed the door. She had a satchel over her shoulder, which he supposed held her potions. She looked around a bit before he heard her call his name softly. Once he raised the cloak a bit to show his feet she made her way to him and he quickly brought her inside of its protective confines, and into his arms.
"I need to get Crookshanks, and a few things from my trunk. I take it we're going to need to travel light for a bit?" she whispered to him.
Harry held his breath when he heard her words. "You…you'll run with me?"
Hermione nodded. "If the choice is with you or without you, I will always choose you Harry."
He let out a breath he was holding and clutched her to him tight. Harry kissed her passionately for a moment before he pulled back. "Met me at Hagrid's once you get your things, I already have mine down there."
"Hagrid's? Why Hagrid's Harry?"
Harry smirked. "Because Sirius gave Hagrid his motorcycle; I found it and that is our ride to London. It flies, and it's safer than a broom. If we need to, we can land and blend in with the normals. Also more comfortable than a broom for long distance flights and I know how much you hate broom travel. Trust me, I know."
Hermione asked worriedly. "What about Crookshanks? I can't leave him Harry."
"Trust me, Love. I wouldn't leave him behind even if you asked me."
Harry looked deep into her eyes when he heard her speak again. "Me and you, right Harry?"
He nodded and whispered back to her with all the love in his heart and soul. "Always and forever my love, me and you."
Chapter 2: Blowback
Ellen Granger sat on her daughter's bed wondering how it could have come to this. No, if she was truthful with herself, and she always tried to be, she knew exactly how this happened. Hermione was after all, her mother's daughter. That didn't make the situation any less heartbreaking however.
Everything about Hermione's room was the same as it always was. Two walls dedicated to books all sorted in her own system. Vanity decorated with pictures of her times at Hogwarts. Every one featuring the reason why this room was empty. As if the pictures knew how she felt every single image of Harry Potter looking worried, half hiding behind the images of Hermione. The images of her daughter looked defiantly when she looked at them as if daring her mother to try and remove him.
Ellen shook her head in despair. They looked everywhere they could think of. Headmaster Dumbledore assured them that they would expend every resource to find their wayward daughter and see her returned home. Even going so far as to cover the cost of purging the potions that was believed to be in her system.
With a sigh and a frown Ellen rose from Hermione's bed closing the door behind her. Unlike her husband she wasn't so sure that Hermione was being controlled. It didn't feel right to her. Not with what she knew of Hermione's young man from their talks over the years. Over the last few days though her opinion wavered. Until she talked to Hermione she just didn't know anymore.
The knock on the door acted like a gunshot on the distraught mothers nerves making her jump. Ellen remained at the top of the stairs until she heard the knock repeat. Not knowing who could be calling at this time of the day, Ellen walked to the door to see who it was.
As the door opened the caller turned out to be the postmen. "Evenin Miss. Got a letter for ya. Sign here please."
Bemused Ellen signed her name and took the letter from the man. He tipped his ball cap to her and left. Not knowing who could be writing to them by registered mail she flipped the envelope over and froze.
She easily recognized her daughters elegant script before her name even registered. Quickly she raced up to her bedroom throwing open the door.
"I don't care what you think!" Jake yelled into the receiver. "You're in the business of finding people. I'm willing to pay what it cost. Are you going to take the job or NOT?"
Ellen watched her husband flinch from the phone in his hand scowling. "Bastard!"
She winced when he slammed the handle back into its cradle. "Call me a nutter because I try and explain to him that she could be anywhere!"
"Jake…"
The frazzled visage of her husband turned to his wife finally noticing her pale expression. His outrage immediately turned to concern. "Sweetheart? What's the matter?"
Not able to reply she held up the letter seeing his eyes widen as he too recognized the script. Both moved to their bed sitting down tearing the letter open drinking in their daughters words.
Dear Mum and Dad,
First I want you to know that the only reason I am writing this letter is because Harry asked me to. I know you both are terribly angry with me for running away, but you did not give me a lot of choice in the matter. Professor Dumbledore told you a lot of unflattering things about Harry, and despite all the things I told you about him, you treated him as if he were pure evil without even giving me the chance to explain. It was very unfair to both Harry and I. Harry loves me with everything he has and had proven it time and time again.
I love him with everything I am as well. Harry is everything to me, and you two tried to take that away. Needless to say I am not very happy about it. However, Harry asked me to write this letter so you two did not worry too much about me. I am doing very well, and I will tell you a little about what is going on with us.
Understand I will not be telling you about where we are going, and by the time you get this letter, we will have already moved on. Dumbledore and his people are looking for us. Voldemort and his people are looking for us, and knowing Dad, he has hired an investigator to find us. Save your money, if they can't find us, you won't.
For the last few days we had taken rooms at the Leaky Cauldron in Diagon Alley. Yes, I know you looked there, but Tom is a friend of Harry's and hid us very well. We spent some time shopping, again I know you asked around and no one said anything, but again, most of the shop-keepers are friends and/or, at least, respect Harry and did not say anything. Not even to Dumbledore and I doubt to Voldemort either. We gathered everything we needed for our trip, and as I am writing this, plan on leaving tonight to where we are headed next.
Yes, I have eaten well, and we are not saying in bad places. Harry has been taking very good care of Crookshanks and me. Currently, Harry is sitting across from me writing his own letters while watching cartoons on the telly with Hedwig, his owl. I have never seen such a little boy look on his face before, and it really warms my heart to see him so relaxed. I told you a little about what his…relatives…were like. I almost wanted to cry when he told me that this was the first chance he had to even see a cartoon without fear of being caught. You should have seen his face when we went to the cinema yesterday. It was like Christmas had come early for him, He was so happy.
We have decided that we are going to take a tour of the world together. I know from our travels how much there is out there, and Harry has never even gone on one vacation. Don't worry about us, Harry is quite well off, and we are very well set for our travels. According to my calculations, we should want for nothing for years if we traveled this way. Rest assured, things are well on our end. I know you think we are too young to do what we are doing. I can understand your thinking on this, but what you do not understand is that since I have been going to Hogwarts, I grew up. Harry never had the chance to be a child, and really, neither have I. Young in years we might be, but we are more than capable of handling ourselves.
Despite how mad I am at you, know that we love you very much, and I miss you. Yes, even Harry loves you even though you treated him the way you did. We will drop you post when we leave where we are. Do not bother to send post to us since we will be long gone by the time you could. Owls will not even find us. So please, don't bother. Maybe after a while, if you two calm down, I might call the house. Don't expect it for a while however.
If you love me, you will accept my relationship with Harry. Do not blame him for me running away. It was as much my choice as it was his. We love you and hope you are doing well. We got a nice camera, and Harry has already used several rolls of film playing with it. Next post we will see if we can send you a few pictures, though they may not be enchanted as we are unsure how to make the film solution as yet.
Harry, Crookshanks, and Hedwig say Hi.
P.S. No I am not pregnant.
Love,
Your daughter Hermione.
XxXDaRXxX
The Order meeting had just broken up a few moments ago. Not that it was much of a meeting. It had consisted of Dumbledore orchestrating everyone to search for Harry Potter. For his part, Alastor 'Mad-Eye' Moody was sitting back in his chair with a small smile on his scarred face. His good humor was not lost on the few Order Members who had stayed behind.
Nymphadora Tonks, Remus Lupin, Hestia Jones, Minerva McGonagall, and Arthur Weasley were still sitting at the kitchen table of the Burrow. Since Black's death, they had been unable to get back into the old Headquarters. So they had been attending to business here. Molly Weasley was thrilled since it meant huge upgrades to the wards about her family's home. Free was always welcome to the hard up couple.
"What's got your fancy tickled Mad-Eye? Look like little boy who's seen his first tit." Drawled Tonks. McGonagall sniffed at the lewd comment.
Moody, for his part, only smiled a bit wider, ignoring the shudder that came from Jones. "Looking forward to the chase. Should be interesting to see what Potter's got."
"He's not a piece of meat or one of your Dark Wizards, Alastor. He's a troubled teen who has no idea what he's getting into." McGonagall sternly reprimanded him.
The old Auror chuckled. "Didn't say he was. Truly, I am looking forward to seeing how Potter handles his newly stolen freedom. The Granger girl with him should make things pretty interesting as well. It's not everyone who can get under Dumbledore's skin like those two have."
Arthur nodded with a slight smile on his face. "She's Muggle Born, Harry's Muggle Raised. Hermione has the knowledge while Harry has the drive. I worry for the two teens, but they are not going to be easy to catch because of it. Quite the team."
Remus snorted. "If Sirius was alive, I'd owe him fifty galleons."
At some of the strange looks he was getting he shrugged a shoulder. "He bet me that if Dumbledore pushed Harry, this would happen sooner or later. It was one of things he argued about with the Headmaster on more than a few occasions. I told him there was no way he would leave Ms. Granger. Sirius nodded and said I was right, she'd run with him."
"I remember telling him there was no way she would do it. Friends don't just take off and run together like that. Sirius smiled at me and told me, 'Friends don't. Lovers do. Mark my words Remus, if they're not yet, they will be by Christmas.' Looks like the mutt was right."
Hestia Jones seemed puzzled. "I thought they were just friends? That's what the rumor mill was spinning anyways."
Mad-Eye was chuckling again. "That's the best part. I say they had been more than friends for this year at the least. Possibly longer. I remember them being awfully chummy and close back when I got released from that scum Crouch."
"Here's the real kicker, those two managed to hide their feelings from the public eye for only they know how long. And at their ages too! They fooled all of us. They fooled Albus! They did exactly what I use to teach the Auror recruits. If you got family, you keep it quiet. Dark Wizards can't hurt your loved ones if they don't know they exist. Potter and Granger did exactly that, and no one was the wiser. THAT'S Vigilance." He ended with a nod of approval.
He looked around to see if anyone else was listening before he leaned into the table. "Bet Albus never told you lot about the Great Harry Hunt of '86, did he?"
Everyone gave him puzzled looks and shook their heads.
"I had just retired from the Auror corps the year before. We caught all we could of the old ranks. The rest of 'em had slipped away back to being 'honest citizens'. Albus floo called me saying Harry was in trouble, and he needed my help."
"Course, he's Harry Potter, I made my way to Privet Drive to help. We all owed that kid a lot. Didn't matter if it was some fluke of magic or something divine, he made the peace happen. I wasn't going to let him down."
Everyone had leaned in close to listen. Mad-Eye might have been unpleasant to look at because of all his battle scars but when he talked like this, telling a story, people couldn't help but listen. Maybe it was the fact he had been there, in the dark, maybe it was the way he told a story. Either way, people listened.
"I met Albus at the house and right from the off, I didn't like them Dursleys. Couldn't understand what old Albus was thinking, but that wasn't the time for it. We discovered that something had happened at the school, and Harry had disappeared. Didn't take us long to figure out he was getting bullied. The surprise was he apparated to get away, ended up on the roof. A teacher saw him up there, surprised. Soon as he saw the teacher he panicked, and he was gone again."
Tonks held up her hand. "Hold up. You're telling me Harry accidentally figured out how to Apparate, and then started doing it on purpose? You know how much power that takes. That doesn't seem right."
Moody was nodding with a huge smile on his face. "Yeah, so like I said, we started tracking him down thinking he couldn't have gotten far. We didn't pick up his trail again until the next day, London. Turns out, he appeared there and this old priest took him into his shelter, got him fed up some and a place to sleep the night."
Various mumbles of 'My word' and 'London' rang out as Mad-Eye kept up his story. "Yup. London. The Priest felt for the kid and showed him some pictures of his vacation he took through Ireland telling him stories until young Harry fell asleep. Next day, Harry was gone again."
"Now Albus thought he was still in London, but I got to wondering if maybe Harry didn't try to go where the pictures showed. So while Albus was looking about London I made my way to some of the those places. Don't you know it, I caught a sniff."
"Seemed Harry had started figuring out he had something special. I spent almost a week tracking him all over that place trying to find him. He was like a ghost, touching on everything but never leaving a print. Harry started figuring out how to survive on his own, and was doing a damn good job of it too."
"He taught himself how to summon wandlessly. No mean trick that. Took to lifting food at restaurants, stores, name it and he was working the angles to get what he needed. Need a place to kip? Find a shelter. Need food? Snag and dash. Made professional pickpockets look like amateurs. Knew I wasn't gonna catch the little urchin on my own. So, I made contact with Albus when I was getting close. After him being gone two weeks we finally caught up with him in one of those big shopping places the muggles like."
Remus was sitting back listing with a proud little smile on his face at Harry's young antics. It was more than a little accomplishment for a six year old to evade an Auror like Moody. James would have been proud. Moody started chuckling as he continued his tale which drew him out of old painful memories of his friends.
"So, here we are, and Albus is right cheesed at the boy. Me, I'm tickled. Never had a kid give me a run like that. Finally, we catch him in the act. He's in this food court when we spotted him and see him summon a plate of chips while the bloke that had his back turned. Then, as cheeky as you please, does the same thing to this lady's drink, and then a sandwich from the waiter as he was walking along. Right in front of the whole damn place. No one caught him. Bold as brass he was, just sat at an empty table and started in on his ill-gotten booty. A bigger smile I never seen on kid. Right pleased with himself he was."
By this time the whole table was laughing at the story. Tonks was actually holding her side and Remus had tears coming out of his eyes. Even McGonagall was fighting to keep her laughter in. It was a battle she was losing.
"I couldn't believe my eye. Right then and there, I liked the kid. No knowledge of his world, and he turns a bit of accidental magic into a new life. Like a duck to water he was, and he didn't even have a wand! Seemed to know not to let anyone see him do it, and no one did. Albus was not amused and stormed right up to Potter."
Here Moody puffed up his chest and mimed the Headmaster walking up from his chair which only had everyone laughing even harder at the mental image. "Mr. Potter, it is time for you to go back to your relative's home. This is not the kind of life for you." Moody said miming Dumbledore at his most pompous to the roars of his audience.
Settling back Mad-Eye nodded with a wicked twinkle in his eye. "Potter though, he had other ideas. Got to give it to the kid, he was a quick study. He told Albus that his Aunt and Uncle did not want him. They were mean to him, and his cousin was the one who was bullying him at his school. Told the Headmaster he was better off on his own, at least he got to eat."
The mood seemed to deflate a bit but Mad-Eye still had a lot of laughter in his eye. "Dumbledore was not impressed. Grabbed Potter's arm and then all hell broke loose. Potter started screaming. Loud. He was tugging at his arm trying to free himself shoutin 'Stranger! Stranger Trying to Get Me!'"
Moody was laughing so hard at this point he words barely came out as a chocked wheeze. None of the people sharing his tale were in any better condition. "It came out of nowhere because he was calm one moment and screaming the next. Shocked Albus so bad he let the kid go. He quickly got his mind back on track and made to grab young Potter again, but it was the wrong move."
"See, the Muggles in the eatery were not just letting it go. No, the second Potter started screaming about 'Strangers' everyone started watching. Before either of us could say anything we had three muggles on each of us pinning us to the ground."
Mad-Eye was laughing hysterically at this point trying to keep talking. "Thing was, Harry was standing there lookin like he was crying and this muggle guy was holding him telling him he was okay. Muggle security came and made to take us along. We had to, too many witnesses now, but I looked at young Harry and saw something I will never forget."
"He was standing there with his little hands over his eyes sniffing. It was real convincing but I saw him peeking. When we made eye contact he smiled at me. SMILED! The muggle who led him away from us, you won't believe this, was the same bloke he nicked the chips from!"
By this time both Remus and Tonks had fallen out of their chairs from laughing so hard. Minerva was holding a handkerchief over her mouth to stifle her own while Mr. Weasley was guffawing and smashing the table with his hand.
"It was great. Bested by a six year old. Out played by a little snot nosed minor. I loved it. Kid earned his nicked meal that day."
It took quite a while for everyone to calm down a bit before he picked it back up. "Our problem was that he was on to us now. Found out he nicked another picture book of sites around the isles. Now we had no idea where he was, and he never stayed in one place very long. Took us another week to get a real lead on him again."
Tonks was still trying to wipe the tears out of her eyes and was shaking her head. She didn't even bother to try and get back into her chair until Remus offered her his hand. "Wow, six year old Harry managed to avoid both you and Dumbledore for a month. Unbelievable."
Mad-Eye nodded still smiling insanely. "It's true."
After a moment however his expression darkened. "Only reason we caught him at all was he got scared. Started pushing himself real hard. Ended up exhausting himself. Caught up with him outside of York. Bad business. I figured he must have passed out after appearing because he was just lying there in the open."
Mad-Eye took a fortifying drink from his flask. "Here's where things got dicey, second we get back to Privet Drive. Dumbledore starts talking about how things were not right."
"I told him then, the muggles were a bad lot. They were gonna ruin the boy. Asked to let me take him. I'm strict, but I had loads to teach him. Help him control his gift because Potter had real talent. I coulda brought the kid up right! Shown him how to be the kind of man James was… Dumbledore said no. Said he had to stay with them Dursley's because of the wards. Hell, my place is about as secure as it gets, even better than those wards on Privet Drive. No luck."
"The thing that bothered me the most was that Dumbledore said he had to Obliviate the boy. Couldn't let him remember what he done. I was mighty shocked about that personally. Oblivation is dangerous on young minds; Dumbledore had the skill so that was not really the issue. It was just the idea you know? Then he placed all kinds of charms on him to keep him from running off like that again. Obedient, loyalty, all kind of gray stuff. Don't get me started on the blood trackers he made. Didn't like that one bit. Dumbledore said it had to be done though."
The laughter had pretty much gone out of the room at that point. The old Auror took a drink from his flask and sat quite a moment before he started back up. "Once he was gone, I undid everything I could." He confessed with a nod.
"Never was one for Memory Charms so that one stuck, nor could I do anything about the tracking devices he made. Personally I would have set up the Charm under time delay so that when he was around sixteen or so it would come off. Shame to let all that experience go to waste. Would have aced his test without a care or try. Not to mention wandless summoning would have come in handy had he ever been disarmed."
"Anyhow," Moody stated with a grin that would have made a preacher cringe. "That was the Great Harry Hunt of 86'. If it took me a month to find him when he was six, I am looking forward to seeing what he and Granger got."
Chapter 3: Holy Crap, It Worked?
Harry chuckled to himself as he folded the last of his letters. It was good to finally get that out of the way. If nothing else, no one could say he didn't try. Hermione's voice rang through their room from shower. It still amazed him she did that. He never would have pictured Hermione as a shower singer.
Sliding the pile of letters to the side Harry picked up the packet of photos they had taken over the last few days. So far their trip around the world was going better than he could have ever hoped.
Harry guided the motorcycle along the old road to their first destination, Newgrange. He wanted to see it, and it was as good a place to go as any. After a moment, he parked the heavy bike and waited for her to climb off the back. He slung his leg over and started taking off his helmet while Hermione stretched her legs to get the numbness out. They had been driving for a while now and neither of them were seasoned veterans to this type of travel yet.
He took a moment to take her in. The wind was lightly brushing her hair over her shoulders and her eyes were focused on the five thousand year old structure and the tourists who were gathering about. She had her head up high and her arms to each of her sides as far as they would go while she stood on her tiptoes. Harry smiled. She looked so focused and yet carefree at the moment.
"Harry, how long can we stay here? Can we do the tour?" His lover asked him once she had finished stretching out her muscles. She knew he had only wanted to see this place since he had been dreaming of it for the last couple of days. Though neither of them could understand why. He looked down at his arm to check the time before he realized his watch didn't work. He really needed to replace it one of these days.
"Honestly Harry, I don't know why you still wear that thing. It hasn't worked since the second task our Fourth year." Harry looked up and smiled sheepishly.
"Habit, I think. It's the only watch I ever owned. Had to nick it from Dudley when his arm got to fat for the band." He looked around. "Yeah, we can do the tour. I'd like to know what the deal is with this place. You can feel it, can't you?" Harry knew there was…something in the air. Hogwarts had a similar feel, just not as strong as this. It was slightly different, yet the same.
Hermione nodded. "Yes, I can. I wonder if there are any runes mixed in with the all the astronomical equations inside. It will be fascinating to compare them with modern methods, don't you think."
Harry smiled fondly as she reached into the saddlebag of the bike and took out a notebook and pen. He had it made just for her a couple of days ago, and it had 'Hermione Potter' on the cover. The bookbinder he bought it from guaranteed it would act the same as a family Grimoire or family spell book. It would allow her to take all the notes she could desire or jot down all the idea's she had while they were visiting sites like these and yet keep all her secrets as well as any other such book. Harry felt his eyes glaze over at remembering her 'thank you' that night. With a goofy smile that not even Riddle could Avada Kedavra off his face, he reached over placing his arm around her waist and walked up with the rest of the tourists and prepared to head inside.
They listened to the guide talk about how it was built by Neolithic farming communities; the passage tombs had clear astronomical alignments such as the Winter Solstice Sunrise at Newgrange and the Equinox Sunrise at Loughcrew. Harry listened to the tour while his love took down notes on the astrological, spiritual, religious and ceremonial importance of the place just as attentively as she would her history of magic classwork. Much as present day cathedrals are places of worship where dignitaries are laid to rest so was Newgrange.
After the tour was over, they decided to make for Knowth and then Loughcrew to repeat the experience. Hermione had taken massive notes on the runes they could see and was scribbling ferociously as they explored the sites. He was so glad he got that feature that allowed for near infinite paper in the book.
Over all, it was a wonderful day full of new experiences, playful banter, and expounding on what it all meant. In full lecture mode, she explained to Harry that a great deal of the current practices used by modern Wizards and Witches traced their origins to those inscribed on the walls in these locations.
The big surprise, and it really was a big surprise, was finding a rune inside Newgrange that looked a lot like the symbol on the Potter Crest. A crossed sword and wand. Hermione was excited about it, telling him he must have had an ancestor who was a part of the building. Harry ended up walking away with a whole new perspective; almost positive that this was why he was dreaming of these places. Hermione had taken his picture with him pointing to the rune smiling. Harry spent quite a bit of time also taking pictures or trying to get other tourists to take their picture together and doing the same for others.
Harry heard the shower cut off breaking him from his thoughts. Dobby had already moved his letters to storage for him to send off later. Harry smiled. The little guy was really starting to grow on him. Taking the towel that was around his own shoulders off, he lightly tossed it to side while making his way over the large trunk that sat in the middle of the room. When Hermione opened the door and walked in from the loo he found himself just watching her for a moment.
He dared anyone to blame him for it. There in front of him, was a vision of beauty. The thing he loved the most was that she was not beautiful in the traditional sense. She was not anorexic thin; she had womanly curves in all the right places. They fit together perfectly. She was…well…she was Hermione. Pure and simple, and really, nothing could compare to her perfection in his eyes. And here she was wearing nothing but a towel draped about her torso. Her long hair fell about her in wet lanks. She was valiantly trying to get the tangles out with her brush as she sat in front of the large mirror. After a few moments, she stopped brushing and looked at him with a funny expression on her face.
"Alright there, Harry?"
He gulped and took in a breath. He hadn't even realized he had completely frozen to watch her. He must have been doing so for some time now for her to notice. He nodded still a bit dumbstruck. "Yeah. Just…sort of taking in the vision before me."
Her lips twitched slightly, but it was her blush his eyes fell on burning along her upper cheeks. "Thank you, that was very sweet." She whispered back. After blinking a few times Harry got back to what he was doing.
"Anything from the Library you wanted before we set off, love?"
She stopped a moment before shaking her head. "I already packed the ones we got from Flourish and Blots." Harry nodded as he pulled a key ring from his pocket. After taking a moment to look at the initials in the old keys he fitted one into the lock on the trunk and twisted.
The Trunk was a replica, sort of, of the trunk that Moody had during their fourth year. It had seven compartments and was currently loaded with everything they needed for their World Tour. Currently, it was set at the first compartment, which was a general storage section or typical trunk space.
Once he twisted the key in the lock a second, third, and fourth section popped up. Harry looked down and into the deep pit, which comprised the mostly empty library stacks down three walls. It descended about thirty feet. Currently, the only books on the shelves were their old school books, a few others they had picked up here and there over the years, the thirty or so Hermione had said she wanted the other day, and a modest collection of Muggle books which still only occupied a small fraction of the three stacks.
"Are you sure the Library is big enough love?" he couldn't help but query for the thousandth time.
Hermione replied, "Yes Harry, as its mostly just empty space."
"For now…" Harry mumbled. In a month, maybe two, she'd have them full of books. Maybe I should have bought that other trunk anyways. I suppose I could always get us a library trunk later after she fills this one…
"What was that, Love?"
Harry chanced a quick glance at her through the mirror and noticed she was glaring at him with an eyebrow raised. He quickly and clearly said, "Nothing dear." She continued to stare at him a moment before she nodded and started brushing her hair again. Harry quickly collected the few books they had lying about, descended the long ladder, and put the books on their designated shelves according to the parchment she had stuck to the wall. Once it was all in place he rose out of their library, selected another key and turned the lock to the second section of the trunk.
He waited for the trunk to fit for the one he selected and looked in. It was spaced like a regular trunk, but full of slim cases in the first three quarters of the space. Twelve in total in the double six rows. The other side was in three sections loaded with galleons, sickles, and knuts flush up to the edge.
"France, Bulgaria, Turkey, China, Japan, Russia… Let's see here, India, Australia, England, Brazil, Mexico, Ah, States." Harry pulled out the one labeled for the States and opened it up to see neat flush stacks of hundreds, fifties, and twenties.
Kneeling before the trunk, he pulled out his billfold and took out the lose pounds and replaced them with a couple of thousand in dollars. He closed the case, put the pounds in the case for England, and put that one away as well.
He looked back up at his lover. "You already took care of your money pouch and purse yeah?" She nodded as she picked up her clothes and headed into the bathroom to change. He quickly filled his own pouch with gold and once again turned the lock.
Once it had set to the last compartment Harry walked away taking one last look around. He was pretty sure they had packed everything. He noticed there were six little vials sitting on the nightstand. Only one still had potion in it still. He pulled out his watch from his pocket to check the time as it was getting late and he did not want her to forget her potion. She was still healing from the Ministry fight.
The pocket watch was silver, with his house-crest engraved on the cover. Once he pressed the button to flip it open, his eyes rested on the picture inside the little door. It was Hermione and he standing just outside the doors to the Great Hall in Hogwarts. Colin had taken the picture after Harry and Hermione had finished their last dance together and were taking a breather. Both of them dressed in their Yule finest. One of his best memories. The little versions of them waved merrily at him while he looked on fondly.
The watch itself was a very complicated piece of equipment; it had twelve hands and little stars and planets all around it. After all his time in Astronomy, and having had Mr. Weasley explain how his worked when he asked him a while back, he was well versed in its use. Engraved into the center of the timepiece was, 'Always and Forever, HP/HG.' He loved it. Hmmm. Six o'clock. Yeah, time for her evening potion.
Hermione had gotten him the watch from a maker in the craft in Diagon Alley and only gave it to him this morning. She wanted it to be a Birthday present, but after their visit to Newgrange she decided he needed it now more than later. He was quite touched by it, and it quickly became his most prized possession.
"Don't forget your potion Hermione. It's on the nightstand." He called to her through the loo door.
"Thanks, Harry. I almost forgot about it." She opened the door and walked out wearing a simple blouse and jeans. Harry, for his part, took a seat at the little table by the big bay windows to keep a watch outside to make sure there was no one about.
She had just taken her potion and placed the vial back on the nightstand when Harry asked her again. "Are you sure this is going to work? I've had some harebrained ideas before, but really, this one takes them all."
Her sweet laugh rang out in the room drawing his attention to her before he resumed his vigil. "Yes, Harry. I will admit at first I thought it was barmy, and despite the fact you got this idea from a cartoon on the telly, it is still a good idea, and it will work."
He nodded, feeling a bit reassured. It would really suck to get caught now before they even had a chance to really get out there and explore. He moved a bit of the curtain to get a better view of the outside.
Once again, he pulled the pocket watch she had gotten for him. "Hermione, we got an hour before our ride gets here. You should write a letter to your Mum and Dad. You can send them a couple of the pictures we had developed from our trip to Newgrange if you like."
He looked up to see his lover frowning at him. "I wrote them a few days ago."
Harry sighed. "I know Hermione, maybe it's wishful thinking on my part, but I am hoping the letters settle them down and maybe we can patch things up later, you know? They are your parents, and I know you love them. They love you too. I'm more pissed at Dumbledore for ruining everything for you than I am at them. I can relate to your parents wanting to protect you. I am pretty protective of you myself."
She sighed when he finished speaking. "If you want me to… I am still unhappy with them, Harry. I told them all about you. They knew how special you are to me. They didn't even give you a chance… Mum especially knew how important you are to me… I had been talking to her about you for the last two years."
Harry smiled reassuringly. "It's okay love. I just thought since we're heading across the pond… It might be weeks before we find the time. There are a lot of things both Muggle and Magical to look into in the States, you know?" He watched as she glumly nodded before she started penning the letter.
He was just about to get up when he noticed something he didn't notice before. Harry squinted looking across the street and down a few blocks. "Hermione… come here and tell me if that looks like an older Crabbe to you."
He pointed out the man he was looking at and waited until he heard her sharp intake of breath before he was sure he was right. "Harry, I think you're right. That's Crabbe Sr! Voldemort is on to us, we might have to change plans. I don't like this Harry…"
Harry was sat thinking for a moment before he felt a grin tug at his face. After a moment, said grin developed into a knowing smirk, one that Hermione knew full well meant trouble. She rarely saw it on his face, but when she did, she got worried. It usually meant someone was not going to be happy in a few moments. "I'll be right back love. Keep an eye on him. I just need ten minutes…" With that, Hermione watched as he scampered across the room, lowered the window on the far side and climbed out to disappear.
She sat in the chair he was using, biting her nails while keeping an eye on the Death Eater that stood a hundred yards from her, looking around. She really hated when Harry did things like this without telling her what. She breathed a sigh of relief when, exactly when he said he would be back, she heard him climbing through the window, snickering. Harry snickering evilly was usually a bad sign.
Harry for his part was doing everything to keep his laughter in at what was going to happen. As quickly as he could he ran to the truck, opened it to the first compartment, took out his Omnioculars, set the trunk back to where it was and ran over to Hermione. He shoved the magical spyglass into her hand after he fiddled with the knobs a bit.
"Here, watch. You're so going to love this." He said excitedly.
"Oh, Harry. What did you do? Why do I need to watch through this?" Hermione inquired holding up the Omnioculars.
"We both know it's meant for Quidditch, but I figured out how to record up to ten minutes of anything I wanted to without the written commentary inside. Trust me. This is prank to make Sirius jealous. Hermione we are talking Marauder hall-of-fame here. I would need to talk to Remus to see if anything they ever did is going to top this."
Hermione blinked at him a moment before she did as he asked and looked through the device. Harry knew she did not like pranks, in general, because she thought them a type of bullying. On the other hand, when it was done in retaliation, she rarely said anything negative about it. Harry never was one for pranks that she knew of, at Hogwarts, but she did know he thought about them a lot.
Normally it was with the Weasley twins to help them develop joke ideas so it was mostly harmless. She felt him turn one of the knobs, and she had a nice close up view of their target. She was positive now; he looked like an older version of Crabbe, which meant that Death Eaters were close. She had to fight to roll her eyes at the fact that Harry's response was to prank them. It was not exactly the direction she would have thought he would take, all things considered.
Curiosity got the better of her in the end, and she did as he asked her and watched what was about to happen. She couldn't help but be curious because Harry was snickering behind her uncontrollably, and it was infectious.
A few moments later she saw three…people, and she used that term loosely, walking up to their target. "Harry…is that…"
She could hear the laughter in his voice, "Yup. It's those three weird blokes that kept us up the last two nights."
For the last two nights, they had little real sleep because of those three. Like clockwork, around one in the morning, they appeared out in the parking lot laughing, joking, and drinking. They made no attempt to respect the fact other people had lives and needed sleep. She had talked Harry out of confronting them because she did not want to draw attention to themselves or their location. It was just aggravating for the two of them, but not worth getting into a confrontation when they didn't need one. Just because they chose that…lifestyle, didn't mean everyone else had to know about it, had been Harry's argument. It had made them both a bit grouchy the following mornings.
Worriedly, she asked, "Goodness Harry, what did you tell them?"
Hermione kept watching as three large men, dressed in cocktail dresses, flamboyant wigs, carrying neon handbags and wearing stiletto high heels strolled up in what they might have thought was a manly/seductive manner to the waiting Death Eater. Thanks to the Omnioculars, she could even see the wild makeup they had donned for the day.
"Well… you know… stuff. Alright! I told them that I saw this guy dressed in a robe, and I was wondering if he was part of their…lifestyle. They got all interested when I pointed him out, and then, I came back here to see what would happen."
"Harry you shouldn't have. Crabbe Sr.'s a Death Eater. He'll kill them! They were annoying, but I don't want them dead!"
Harry snorted. "Unlikely, love. Look at the size of those guys! Hell, that one in the front has arms bigger than my thigh! I just wanted to run him off so we don't miss our ride to the States. If three transsexual Muggles hitting on him don't send him running for the hills, then maybe I did him a favor, and he'll still be too busy to notice us before we leave."
Now it was Hermione who snorted while blushing at his word choice. She purposely did not think about what he was implying might happen. She watched the three walk up to the Death Eater and start to flirt outrageously with him. She felt a chuckle escape her as she watched his expression run from horrified to disgusted while the three 'girls' rubbed up on him, touched up on him, and flirted. She gasped though when he seemed to have enough and struck out, knocking one to the ground.
"O my…"
Harry chuckled darkly. "He should'na done that." In a perfect imitation of Hagrid when he said something he was not meant to.
Before the body hit the floor, the other two reacted vehemently. Both of the watchers were reduced to tears, gales of laughter, and pains in their sides within moments of that event.
The dusky skinned one in the lime green dress reared back and kicked out with his foot, directly into the Death Eaters naughty bits. Said minion of the dark was dropped like a felled log after which, he proceeded to get the beating of his lifetime.
They kicked, punched, wailed, stomped, scratched, gouged, and pummeled the prone man. The most viscous of the attackers was the one that got struck, Harry would later have to view the footage, but he could have sworn he had a brick in his handbag, said handbag was used against the beaten man over and over and over again while they screeched and screamed in high pitched voices blokes were never meant to hit.
The two teens watched with tears streaming down their faces as those three cross-dressed men beat the stuffing out of the Death Eater. Hermione was watching and trying to keep the spyglass as still as she could, but she imagined she was failing miserably. A few moments into the savage, one-sided battle another figured moved in, brandished a wand, and shouted something. What it was they never heard, nor did he finish it. As soon as he pointed the wand at the men beating his ally, one of them pulled a can of mace and sprayed him in the face. Even from where they were hidden, they could hear him screaming in agony. Then they took turns beating one man and then the other.
They sprayed mace into their faces, used tazers almost continually, and never stopped with the physical assault in the slightest. Hermione could almost swear one of them had brass knuckles on his hand as he laid into one man, and then the other.
By now, a crowd of onlookers, all laughing hysterically at the antics of two robed men and three transvestites, had gathered. They got all they could on the device holding onto each other to support themselves and tried to calm down. It didn't work very well, as when they looked back up they saw the pale cross dresser in the flaming orange wig that reminded them of Ron's hair, was holding one of the Death Eaters in the air, spinning him around before tossing him through a window.
It was too much, and they dissolved in tears again. Before they could look away, a break in the crowd showed another man in a dress throw himself in the air and landed with his elbow into the prone man below. What had started as an innocent prank to bide time had quickly turned into a battle royale between Team Death Eater and Team Transvestite. It was rather sad to see that Team Death Eater was not only losing, but also losing spectacularly to the amusement of the mundane population around them.
They started gathering up their things. Still laughing, and wiping tears from his eyes, Harry turned to Hermione, "We need to find a way to duplicate that. We need to send that to everyone we know. Hell, I'll even send a copy to Dumbledore just for the giggles. Oh, Oh, and the Prophet. We absolutely have to send copies to the Quibbler and the Prophet just to see what happens. Don't forget Fred and George, and Remus. We must get a copy to Remus." Hermione only laughed more at his rambling antics, but she had to admit, it was a great prank. It couldn't have happened to better people. There was something about a Pureblood Wizard who was part of the Pureblood Supremacy, getting his arse handed to him by three Muggle blokes of a different sexual orientation.
Harry checked his watch and noticed that they only had a few moments before they had to leave. They quickly gathered up all their loose items and making sure for the umpteenth time that nothing was left behind. Hermione walked up to the trunk and climbed inside followed by Harry a moment later. He was about to descend all the way when he stepped back up a bit, reaching down for the keys he had left in the lock on the trunk.
Hermione's voice drifted up from inside the trunk. "Honestly Harry, you really need to work on remembering things. I swear, you would lose your head if it wasn't attached to your neck." She was still fighting the laughter from earlier, and it ruined her attempt to be stern.
Harry retorted, "Bloody hell, Woman. Give a bloke a chance to get use to this stuff. It's not like I have loads of experience gallivanting around the world yet! Not all of us were born with a photographic memory or neurotic planning and control issues you know…"
Her shrill shriek exploded from below him. "HARRY JAMES POTTER! Don't call me Woman!" He had been doing it on and off since they had run off together just to get her goat.
"Noticed you didn't deny the other two…" He mumbled as he started descending again. In a louder voice as his head disappeared into the trunk, "You know you secretly love it…"
"HARRY!" Before the trunk began to close. Harry's snickers became the last thing to sound in the room before the noises of the trunk closing down, one level at a time and then slammed shut. Clicks of the various locks around the sides echoed before all became silent again.
A few minutes later the door opened and two men dressed in gold uniforms with labels of 'Putra Venture Limited' on the backs and breast pockets came in. One of them, a younger man pulled a handcart behind him while the older with salt and peppered hair carried a clipboard. Both men were chuckling, trying to wipe their eyes from the tears that had gathered there from the scene outside. They had, of course, watched the event with the rest of the crowd.
"I swear. I never thought I would see something like that on this job," came from the younger of the two. His amusement still heavily evident in his voice.
The older man, holding the clipboard, nodded while he walked up to the trunk. "Brilliant. I swear he shat himself when that bloke hit him with the tazer." He took a moment to mime the man's jerking about while being electrocuted to his partner's amusement.
"You see all kinds of things on this job, but really, that was the best I have ever seen. Better than that time I came across that wife throwing her cheating husband's things out of the window of their flat while he ran around on the ground floor trying to catch 'em. Priceless."
They shared a laugh for a moment while the younger man maneuvered the handcart into the room. "That us then?" pointing to the ornate trunk sitting in the middle of the room.
"Looks like. Bloke at the counter said the couple staying here wanted to send it off to their house back in the States. They even left us a nice tip." He looked down at the labels on top of the lid checking it against his clipboard. "Yup, matches up. James Black goin' to New York, U.S.A. Careful now, says fragile on here, and they got a good insurance policy. Boss'll get mad if he had to pay out on it."
They carefully stood the crate on end and strapped it down to the dolly and made their way through the door. The older man walking behind to make sure the trunk did not tilt or jerk on the door as they passed. "You catch that Football game yesterday?" He inquired reaching behind him for the doorknob.
The cart handler nodded with a peeved expression. "Yeah, learned never bet on England against Portugal. Lost a hundred quid on that match. Wife's gonna kill me when she finds out…" rang out as the door closed on the room once again.