Kasumigaoka Utaha was, in fact, just an ordinary woman from the slice of life world.
Within the chat group, she usually played the part of Jaeger's sharp-tongued waifu, always bantering and scolding.
Many members often forgot that, behind that role, she was actually terrifyingly powerful.
Jaeger had bestowed upon her a ridiculous arsenal:
A Mythical Zoan Devil Fruit of the same class as Kaido's.
The Twelve Labors of Hercules, a Noble Phantasm from the Type Moon World.
The Eternal Mangekyō Sharingan and Kamui from the Naruto world.
The power of Unohana Retsu and Saito—both immortal beings suppressed by the Shinigami for over four thousand years.
Though she was still a step behind Jaeger himself, Utaha's strength far surpassed most of the group. And the spectacle she created was overwhelming.
"GEYAAAAAAAAAA!!!"
Under the gaze of everyone in the chat, on the live broadcast, a pink oriental dragon—its body spanning like a mountain range—clutched Uchiha Fugaku's towering Susanoo in its claws.
To ordinary people, Susanoo was already an overwhelming titan. Yet compared to this dragon, it looked no different from a toy doll grasped in a giant's hand.
"Click!"
Utaha exerted just a little strength. The armor of Susanoo shattered instantly, compressed like a punctured balloon.
"Ughhhhhh!"
Blood spurted from Fugaku's eyes. The Uchiha patriarch screamed as his body was nearly crushed. A monster larger than the tailed beasts was squeezing the life out of him. Though blind, his instincts screamed of death closing in.
To be killed like this—like some child's plaything—it was humiliation beyond belief.
Yet there was nothing he could do.
Even Susanoo, which he had believed to be the might of a god, was utterly helpless in the dragon's palm. For the first time in his life, Fugaku realized the truth: the Mangekyō Sharingan was not invincible.
Maybe Miyuki was right… Maybe that woman, Luo Hao, truly could split the moon. Perhaps it was just that his strength and his vision were too pitifully low to ever comprehend that kind of power.
After all… this monster was holding his Susanoo in one hand like a toy. How could he even imagine such existence?
"Let me go!"
In agony, Fugaku roared. Susanoo's massive chakra blade slipped through a gap and slashed across the dragon's palm.
"It worked!"
Fugaku's heart leapt. His Susanoo's sword carried the power of his pupils—able to see weaknesses and cut through anything without resistance. Even the dragon's claws could not withstand it!
"Clang!"
Blood rained down like a storm. One of the colossal pink dragon's fingers was severed, leaving behind a gaping flaw.
"Hah! I knew it—the ability to cut through weak points is unbeatable!"
Though blinded, Fugaku was ecstatic. Enduring the torment, he fumbled for the gap created by the missing finger, preparing to slip out.
"That guy's trying to run! Miyuki-san! Madara-san!"
Hovering in the sky, Konan's eyes widened as she cried out.
"It's fine. He won't escape."
Uchiha Miyuki and Uchiha Madara only smiled coldly, as though watching a clown's futile act.
Sure enough, before Fugaku could flee from Kasumigaoka Utaha's grasp, the power of the Twelve Labors activated. Her severed finger regenerated instantly. The massive hand once again clenched shut, crushing down on Susanoo's battered form.
It was just like the Tathagata trapping Sun Wukong. No matter how he struggled, Fugaku could not escape the palm of Utaha's hand.
"No… impossible! I clearly cut off your finger! AHHHHHH!!!"
Vomiting blood, Fugaku trembled as he felt the restored claws close in once more. He finally understood—the monster's regeneration was as terrifying as Madara's.
Even in despair, he grit his teeth. He forced Susanoo to swing its blade again, aiming for the same point as before.
This time, I'll be ready. I'll cut it and run immediately, before she can recover. I won't let her trap me again!
After all, Fugaku was the leader of the Uchiha clan and had decades of combat experience.
Even Uchiha Madara had to admit—the blind Fugaku still had the instincts to make the best possible decision in such a desperate moment.
Unfortunately… it was precisely because of his excellence that he found no mercy.
Kasumigaoka Utaha was better. Far better. And her powers seemed to perfectly counter his supposedly "invincible" ability to cut weak points.
"Ding! Ding! Ding!!"
The massive chakra sword in Susanoo's hand struck against the pink dragon's claw again and again, ringing out with the sharp clang of steel on steel.
"W-What?! How… how can this be?!"
Fugaku's blind eyes widened. Just moments ago, he had sliced through her fingers like paper. But now, no matter how he swung, he couldn't even leave a scratch.
Impossible. It made no sense. His eyes had to hit weak points. That was his power!
"It's the Twelve Labors," a calm, feminine voice echoed in his ear. The softness clashed with the overwhelming monster looming over him. "Even if I explained, you wouldn't understand. Think of this as punishment—for chasing Miyuki."
Wind howled as Fugaku felt himself hurled downward. His mind spun in disbelief. This monster… is a woman?! And she's avenging Miyuki?!
Damn it! What kind of nightmare did I get myself into? Miyuki, you damned woman… if you knew such a terrifying being, why didn't you warn me?! If I'd known, I never would've bowed to Danzō and gone after you! Why didn't you tell me earlier?!
"BOOM!!!"
The crash split the heavens. The entire land shook like an earthquake as Utaha's dragon claw slammed Susanoo into the ground. Shockwaves rolled outward for tens of thousands of meters, toppling everything in their path. The earth cracked open, shattering into rubble.
Prepared for the impact, Uchiha Miyuki had already activated Susanoo, pulling Konan and the other three girls to safety. Madara blurred away with Shunshin, watching coldly from afar.
[Chat Group]
Uchiha Miyuki: "Hey, hey! Senpai, that's too much! Madara just spared Fugaku's life—don't beat him to death! His Highness Jaeger still needs the Noble Phantasm!"
Kasumigaoka Utaha: "Eh? But wasn't I avenging you, Miyuki? This guy almost sliced you in half just now."
Uchiha Miyuki: "!!! Thank you, Senpai! As I thought—your true love is me! His Highness Jaeger was just an accident!"
Scáthach: "…Earlier, Miyuki was immune to the weak point slash. That was because of the Twelve Labors' properties, wasn't it?"
Kasumigaoka Utaha: "That's right. The Twelve Labors of Heracles from the Type Moon World. It doesn't just grant resurrection—it also makes me immune to any attack that has already damaged me once."
Eriri Spencer Sawamura: "Ah this… no wonder. Damn, that ability is straight-up cheating! No wonder this fat woman beats me up every time!"
Uchiha Miyuki: "!!! Hold on! Beating you up?! Tell me in detail, Eriri! I could use the traffic!"
Eriri: "…I-I'm not telling you, you Uchiha pervert!"
Esdeath: "Fufu… let me remind you. Kasumigaoka Utaha only grows stronger with each world she travels to. In Naruto's world, her power will reach even greater heights. Eriri, expect to be bullied by her for a long time yet."
Eriri: "Aaaahhhh!!! Why?! Why wasn't I the one who joined the chat group first?! Why did it have to be this fat booby woman with the worst personality?!"
Kasumigaoka Utaha: "Hmph. Even if you'd joined first, your luck would never match mine. Otherwise, you wouldn't have pulled such a weak newcomer reward."
Eriri: "Damn it! Don't remind me! Just thinking about that reward pisses me off—I never should've been tricked and bound to this cow of a woman in the first place!"
Yamamoto Mei: "Oh? If I recall correctly, Eriri's newbie reward was that Favorability System, wasn't it? You could bind three people. At the time, didn't you bind Jaeger, Miyuki, and Utaha?"
Eriri: "…Yes."
Uchiha Miyuki: "Figures. Eriri, your system is basically invisible these days. You never even summoned His Highness Jaeger to your world. Once his favorability maxed out, you stopped bringing it up altogether. Now I'm curious—what's the difference between my favorability and Utaha's in your system?"
Eriri: "Mr. Jaeger's favorability is still maxed at 100. Miyuki, yours is stuck at 85… barely moved. And Utaha… 25! Damn that fat woman!"
Kasumigaoka Utaha: "Hah. Both Miyuki and I gained 10 points, yet you only complain about me. Isn't that a double standard? Golden retriever… nine-tailed loser."
Eriri: "Don't compare your pathetic 15-to-25 jump with Miyuki's 75-to-85! You disgusting fat woman!"
Jaeger: "Pfft… hahahaha! You girls really are something. Only you could start a full-blown argument over favorability points."
Eriri: "Jaeger-san!!!"
Uchiha Miyuki: "Huh? Why did His Highness Jaeger suddenly pop in?"
Kasumigaoka Utaha: "Eh? Already done, Mr. World Noble? That's not like you. Don't tell me you've finally run out of stamina at your age~"
Tohsaka Sakura: "…Utaha Senpai, you're seriously shameless."
Jaeger: coughs "Oi, watch it. With my kind of immortality, even so-called 'senzu beans' are nothing. I just… might've gone too hard on Leng earlier. She's healing up by absorbing energy now."
Eriri Spencer Sawamura: "Wha—injured?! Are you kidding me?!"
Kasumigaoka Utaha: "He's a World Noble. At this point, nothing surprises me."
Jaeger: "It was my first time doing an angel... Leng miscalculated after losing the Sacred Knowledge Treasury, so… this happened."
Angel Leng: "Stop talking!! This is mortifying! Thank goodness this isn't my own universe—if Queen Keisha and the other angels found out, I'd never live it down for 3,000 years!"
Jaeger: "Alright, alright. But Utaha, teasing me like that earlier… got me pissed. I'll need to punish you."
Kasumigaoka Utaha: "Oh my. And how will you punish me, Mr. World Noble? Going to treat me like one of those Celestial Dragon 'pets'? Ufufu~ now I'm curious."
Eriri: "Wait—WHAT?!"
Jaeger: "We'll talk details in private. Not in front of the group. Anyway, is Fugaku dead yet? Doesn't matter much—his ability overlaps with Mystic Eyes of Death Perception. Boring Noble Phantasm at best."
Kasumigaoka Utaha: "Relax, I didn't let him die. I wouldn't waste a Noble Phantasm for you."
Eriri: "Ughhh, get a room already, you two."
Kasumigaoka Utaha: "At least I'm not some blonde reject nobody wants~"
Eriri: "Wha—?! You... I'll kill you!!"
On the broadcast, the pink dragon's tail flicked, scattering the dust and rubble. In the crater lay Fugaku, beaten into an unrecognizable lump of flesh.
If not for Utaha's assurance, no one would've believed he was still alive.
Uchiha Miyuki: "Tch. Serves him right. But… it is a shame. Itachi's lost his father already."
Jaeger: "Don't worry. Since I got a new Noble Phantasm out of this, I would've taken good care of Fugaku's wife. Same way I did with Rouge."
Uchiha Miyuki: "…Ah, this—"
Yamamoto Mei: "Hmph. A man dying early is always tragic. Your kid grows up as someone else's tool, your wife ends up in another's arms. But… he chose his path. No turning back."
Jaeger: "Hey, don't slander me! First off, I don't hit kids. Second—money? I'm a Celestial Dragon! All the wealth of the world's already mine. I could drown Konoha in gold if I wanted!"
Kasumigaoka Utaha: "Mr. Rich Noble, you'd better get over here. Fugaku won't last long."
Jaeger: "Tch. I could just fry him with lightning from here. …Whatever, I'll come in person."
Space cracked apart. Jaeger stepped out, holding Angel Leng in his arms.
The ancient angel flushed red. To be wounded in battle wasn't shameful. But this reason? Unforgivable. Unable to escape Jaeger's grasp, she buried her head against his chest, refusing to face the world.
Jaeger raised his hand, palm glowing faintly.
"Uchiha Fugaku… You went after Miyuki. In return, I'll take care of your wife and kid in your place."
"The sky is dead."
Crack!
The world around Fugaku shattered. His body dissolved into nothing, erased with the collapsing space itself.
It was, ironically, the grandest burial possible. A funeral even greater men could never dream of.
In that instant, Uchiha Fugaku's legend was usurped—his name swallowed into Jaeger's eyes, claimed by Hermes' hand.
•••
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