Kabe casually ducked behind the bar, grabbed two bottles of booze for the girls, then headed alone down into the guild's basement.
There, he activated the long distance communication lacrima and began contacting his guild master.
After the crystal flickered more than a dozen times, Makarov finally appeared on the surface of the orb, wearing pajamas and rubbing his eyes.
"Haahhh… Kabe? Why are you suddenly using the communication lacrima to call me…?"
Yawning, Makarov still looked half asleep.
He had not even noticed that Kabe was calling him from inside Fairy Tail itself and just squinted blearily at him.
Seeing him like this, an idea flashed across Kabe's mind and he instantly switched to panicked mode.
"Master, this is bad! People from the dark guild Oración Seis and from Phantom Lord have come to the guild!
I cannot handle them alone, you need to hurry back!"
"What?!"
Makarov jolted awake, the sleep instantly blown away. He roared furiously:
"That bastard Jose actually teamed up with a dark guild?!
Brat, protect everyone! I will be right there!!"
The connection cut off immediately. Makarov was clearly already rushing over.
Staring at the now quiet crystal, Kabe scratched his head, suddenly a bit uncertain.
"Was that... maybe a bit much…"
But the moment that thought came up, he remembered how Makarov had looked, still half asleep at this time of day.
"Come on. It is already noon and he is still napping at home. Teaching him a little lesson is perfectly reasonable."
With that, any shred of guilt vanished. He whistled cheerfully and headed back up to the main hall.
...
On the other side, after receiving Kabe's "urgent call for help," Makarov bolted out of his house, not even bothering to change out of his pajamas.
It had barely been half a minute since he heard, but he had already run through several responses in his head.
If even one of the children had been hurt, he would stake his old life on it.
He would hunt down Jose and those Oración Seis bastards and tear them all limb from limb.
'Hold on, you brats. I am coming!!'
Worried sick, Makarov poured all his strength into running.
In only three minutes he had crossed half of Magnolia and arrived at Fairy Tail.
...
Bang!
The guild doors flew inward as Makarov slammed them open. His face was twisted with rage as he bellowed:
"Jose! Get out here!!!"
Laki, who had been repairing tables and chairs, froze mid spell.
Macao, Wakaba, Vijeeter, and the other guild members, who had all returned to quietly "cleaning up the mess," stared at their Master in confusion.
Everyone looked blankly at the tiny old man in cute pink pajamas who had just charged into the guild screaming at the top of his lungs.
Makarov took in their bruised faces and rumpled clothes, but noted that no one seemed seriously injured.
His gaze then swept over the scattered food, the broken furniture all over the floor.
His emotions went from worry and fury to pure confusion.
From how everyone looked, this did not resemble a guild under attack at all.
It looked like… the most normal thing in the world: a Fairy Tail brawl.
So why had Kabe…
As if he had just realized something, Makarov's expression darkened. He slowly scanned the hall.
His eyes locked onto Kabe, who was sitting at the bar, smiling and waving at him.
"Yo, Master, you are here. Come, let me introduce someone to you."
"Kaaaabe, you damned little brat!!!"
Makarov's beard and hair flared as his body swelled, expanding rapidly until he became a small giant whose head brushed the ceiling.
Kabe, however, did not panic in the slightest. He just grabbed Sorano, who still had no idea what was happening, and pulled her closer.
"Do not be mad, old man. This is Sorano, one of Oración Seis."
Then he jerked his chin toward Juvia, whose face had gone completely pale.
"And that is Juvia, a new member of Phantom Lord.
They are here because she has something important to discuss with you, and she just wants to visit the guild.
I cannot split myself in two, so I could not fight and entertain them at the same time."
Makarov: "…"
He looked at Kabe's "innocent" grin, then at the two strange girls trembling under his earlier killing intent.
He sucked in a long, shaky breath. His body slowly shrank back down, returning to his usual small size.
As he calmed down, the terrifying magic pressure that had been spilling out of him also faded away.
Juvia had just started to relax when, in the next second, the old man sprang up onto the bar with a single leap and slammed his fist into Kabe's face, sending him flying across the hall.
"You little bastard, do not think that just because there are guests I will not hit you!
If you dare pull a stunt like this again, then go ahead and prepare yourself to inherit the position of Guild Master!!"