During the first few days of February, Snape's face was always dark. He usually looked unhappy anyway, so only Lily, who spent nearly every day around him, could tell something was bothering him.
After the day's classes ended, the assistant witch would come to the office to help the Potions professor brew his mysterious potion. They had spent several days together, and although they often bickered, the atmosphere between them was surprisingly pleasant. The youthful warmth of the red-haired witch added a little life to that lonely, cold office.
Ever since returning from the White Tower, Snape had been in a foul mood. He did not want Sirius and Lupin coming to Hogwarts. The reason Jim Hacker gave was strange. He said the two of them understood alchemy and happened to be unemployed. Considering that Hogwarts needed more talent in alchemy, Dumbledore accepted the explanation readily enough. Snape had also been asked by that old bumblebee to brew the Wolfsbane Potion, all to help Lupin control his wildness and keep him from transforming and hurting people on the night of the full moon.
The thought of working with those two detestable men made Snape unbearably irritable, and he ended up hating Jim for it too. After returning to his office, Snape always looked as if he were sitting on pins and needles. Every so often, disgust would cross his face, and his bony, chicken-claw hands would twist together as though he wanted to throttle some invisible person.
"What's wrong? Why are you so unhappy? Did someone make you angry?"
Lily secretly found it amusing, so while helping him process the ingredients, she asked out of concern.
The old bat's face looked like a wet rag. The corners of his eyes drooped as he gave the assistant a cold glance, then said nothing.
After being met with that face, Lily gave an annoyed huff and began scraping the powdered unicorn horn with extra force. The little silver knife made a sharp, grating sound that somehow sent a chill down the spine.
"Use a lighter hand. If the powder is too coarse, it will still need to be ground down," Snape reminded her.
Lily obediently eased up, then softly began humming a lullaby. The icy air in the underground office seemed to grow a little warmer under the song.
Snape's furrowed brows relaxed without him realizing it. He very much wanted to stop Lily from humming, because it did not suit the gloomy atmosphere he preferred, but then months of accumulated drowsiness rose over him. Before he knew it, his eyes had closed.
Lily let out a quiet laugh.
The old bat shuddered awake and snapped angrily, "Stop humming."
"One moment you tell me to be gentler, the next you tell me not to make a sound. Why do you have so many demands?" Lily put her hands on her hips.
"I need to concentrate," Snape argued. "You are interfering with my work."
"You mean my humming interferes with you. Fine, I'll listen to you. I won't hum anymore."
Lily's seemingly obedient attitude put Snape in a difficult position. The old bat was also a highly skilled, sharp-tongued expert at wounding people with words, but he had not expected to meet someone today who hid needles in cotton. She left him completely helpless.
Snape stared uneasily at the assistant witch. Candlelight flickered across the soft outline of her profile. Her red hair was warmer than any torch, and if not for her unfamiliar eyes and brows, he might almost have mistaken the person before him for Lily, who had died many years ago.
Come to think of it, they were clearly very different, yet Snape could always see something familiar in Ivanna.
Stubborn, proud, bright-eyed, clever, and always hiding mischievous thoughts beneath calm words, forever leaving him unable to guess what she was truly thinking.
Being resented by such a troublesome witch would be a real headache.
"Collins."
"What is it? Does the great professor have even more demands?" Lily looked back at Snape with a faint smile.
"No, nothing. You... if you want to hum, then hum."
"Now you're ordering me again. Fine, great professor. When you don't want to listen, you can tell me to shut up, and when you want to hear a song, you can order me to sing. Do you think I'm a jukebox?" Lily narrowed her eyes.
That expression was just as familiar. Years ago, whenever a certain girl showed that same look, Snape would immediately panic and lose all composure.
"That is not what I meant. Think whatever you like, but that is not what I meant. Enough. You should add the unicorn powder to the cauldron now."
Lily huffed, but her mood improved considerably. She poured the powder into the cauldron, picked up the long-handled spoon, and stirred. The potion began to boil and smoke, forming a small leaden cloud above it.
The next step was to use a spell to alter the potion's properties. Snape had failed twice at this stage, wasting several hundred Galleons' worth of materials. He wondered whether the assistant witch would bring any hope of success.
"All right. Watch me."
The witch cast a Weather Charm into the leaden cloud. Snape watched nervously as the potion-cloud began to rain. Fine silver-white droplets pattered back into the cauldron and gradually shifted toward a pale lavender-blue color.
"It worked." Snape's brows relaxed noticeably. "We can proceed to the next step."
"How many steps are there in total?"
"Forty-two."
"And how many have you completed?"
"One." Snape turned his head away, because Lily was silently laughing at him.
"Can you tell me what this potion is actually for?" the witch asked after she finished laughing. She looked at Snape seriously. "You can trust me now. And I absolutely will not reveal what I know to anyone else."
The knowledge of the Tower of Tomes had never been forbidden from spreading. Snape had seen the assistant's value, so he agreed to bring her in.
"This potion can reshape a dead person's body. As long as there is even a small amount of tissue from the corpse, even a strand of the deceased's hair, it can create a living body of flesh and blood."
Lily gasped.
For some reason, seeing her shocked expression made Snape feel better than if he had drunk an Elixir to Induce Euphoria. The corner of his mouth twitched, and he said proudly, "Yes, exactly as you are thinking. This is the ultimate field of potion-making, conquering Death."
Lily's thoughts stirred. She wanted to resurrect James.
But why was Snape brewing a resurrection potion? Was it for Voldemort?
A huge conspiracy to welcome the Dark Lord's return would certainly fit the image of a Death Eater.
However, Lily always felt there were other possibilities.
She stared at the old bat's greasy face as if trying to peel open his exterior and find some clue. Unfortunately, besides being a master of Occlumency, Snape was also very good at controlling his expression.
"You're brewing this potion for yourself? Who do you want to resurrect?"
"That is none of your business," Snape said roughly, brushing her off. "You only need to help me complete the potion. I will pay you accordingly."
"I'm not short on money, but I also want to resurrect someone. A resurrection potion can only create a body of flesh and blood, but how is the soul of the dead supposed to return? Do you have the Resurrection Stone?"
"That... we have our own method."
"We? You and who?"
"Ms. Collins, I'm afraid I have no obligation to explain that to you."
"So you're only helping someone else. That person wouldn't happen to be Dumbledore, would it?"
Snape looked as if he had been pricked. He disliked the assistant's sharp mind. It was like a needle, teasing at the scars hidden beneath his wide black robes.
"Since you have guessed it, do not spread it around. I am indeed helping Dumbledore. That is all."
"Resurrecting the dead might attract something terrible. You should prepare yourselves. It would be best to ask Skyl for help," Lily kindly reminded him.
"He has already helped us enough." Snape took a deep breath. In his heart, he thought of the suggestion Skyl had once made.
Skyl had said he could create a parallel timeline and let Snape travel back to the past, allowing him to start over with his childhood sweetheart, Lily, and make up for every regret. To Skyl, this was merely a small effort, and he would be very happy to do it because he would get to watch plenty of entertainment.
But Snape had refused, even though, for one instant, he had been tempted.
On the day Lily died, a hollow was left in Snape's chest. A Lily from another world could not fill it.
Only atonement could ease this long wound.
Lily gazed deeply at Snape. She discovered that she had only thought she understood him, but had never truly read him.
"Don't worry. I'll stand on your side. After all, I'm your assistant."
In her heart, the witch silently added, until the day my identity is exposed.
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