Wangshu Inn, as the only resting place between Mondstadt and Liyue, used to be packed with travelers. But ever since the dragon crisis began in Mondstadt, business had been declining day by day.
"It looks like Xiao went out to clear out some monsters. He's not on the rooftop eating Almond Tofu."
Su Bai had stopped by Wangshu Inn hoping to see Xiao, but he'd come up empty. Feeling a bit bored, he sat down on a chair to wait for a while, figuring he might as well rest his feet.
"Xiao's karmic debt keeps piling up. It's a shame I don't have enough adeptal energy to help him."
"I hope this trip to Mondstadt proves my theory right. Otherwise, I'll have to track down the Archon and ask if he knows any way to rapidly increase my adeptal energy."
Thinking about the ill-fated fortune slip he'd drawn before leaving last night, Su Bai felt a headache coming on. Back in Inazuma, he'd learned some simple divination from Yae Miko. It wasn't very accurate, but drawing the worst fortune ten times in a row was enough to make anyone take notice.
After all, the odds of drawing the worst fortune ten times consecutively were roughly the same as the Jade Chamber falling out of the sky and being smashed by Ningguang. Even Su Bai hadn't expected that result.
"Forget it, no use dwelling on it. Things will work themselves out. Even if I can't win a fight, I can still run."
Su Bai stood up, trying to reassure himself. But he knew exactly what he was thinking. Mondstadt was like a road of no return. Once he stepped in, getting back out wouldn't be so easy.
"Fox's sake, when did I pick up Miko's habit of thinking three steps ahead? I've got the Geo Archon backing me up. Who do I have to fear?"
Having apparently convinced himself, Su Bai cast aside his earlier worries and shouted toward the kitchen where Yanxiao was slacking off:
"Yanxiao! Whip up a few of your signature dishes. Put it on Zhongli's tab. Just send the bill to Wangsheng Funeral Parlor at the end of the month."
Night fell as expected. Under the stars, the road from Liyue to Mondstadt lay empty. The bustling traffic of days past seemed to have become nothing but a memory. A boy with fox ears and a fox tail, a blade of grass held between his lips, strolled unhurriedly down the road. If a painter had captured this scene, the painting might have been called "The Youth."
He was heading straight into Mondstadt, a land gripped by dragon calamity, yet he charged ahead without hesitation for the dream in his heart. Wasn't that the very definition of a hot-blooded youth?
Now, the youth had barely set foot in Mondstadt territory when he ran into his first problem. A group of Treasure Hoarders was boldly robbing travelers right on this main road between Liyue and Mondstadt.
Looking at the Treasure Hoarders brandishing all sorts of weapons, Su Bai was so excited he almost laughed out loud. Heavens above, after all these years, he'd finally run into some Treasure Hoarders with no sense of self-preservation.
"Wh-what are you doing? I, I don't have any Mora on me!"
Seeing Su Bai act so "timid," a burly man about two meters tall stepped out from the group. This guy looked like he'd been through plenty of "hard fights." At least a dozen scars, big and small, were visible on his exposed skin.
"Kid, hand over all your food! I'm starving to death here!"
"Th-this... big brother, I don't have any food either."
The burly man, who seemed to be the Treasure Hoarder leader, looked Su Bai up and down. Seeing that he was alone and empty-handed, a flicker of disappointment passed through the leader's eyes.
"Are you crazy? It's still a three-day trek to Mondstadt! Without food, are you trying to starve yourself to death?"
"Get lost, just get lost. What rotten luck. Sanzi, give this pale-faced kid a few flatbreads. I don't want him dying on the road and making us deal with the corpse. That'd ruin our luck for doing business in Mondstadt."
Su Bai's eye twitched. This Treasure Hoarder crew was surprisingly decent. Seeing that they were about to send him on his way, Su Bai decided to stop pretending.
"Hey there. Have any of you ever heard a saying from Wangsheng Funeral Parlor?"
"A saying? What saying? You're not actually going to pick a fight with that little fruit knife of yours, are you?"
The Treasure Hoarders nearly cried with laughter when they saw Su Bai pull out a tiny fruit knife, the kind used for peeling apples. Su Bai didn't say another word. Instead, he broke into a classic squinty-eyed fox smile.
"The saying goes: One quick cut, you're shut in a box—square as can be. Now drop dead, and don't forget to rate us five stars from the afterlife!"
The still-laughing Treasure Hoarders didn't quite understand what Su Bai meant. They looked at each other in confusion, their eyes full of bewilderment.
Su Bai didn't bother explaining. They'd find out soon enough.
While the Treasure Hoarders were still puzzling over his words, Su Bai suddenly transformed into a flash of white light.
Before the Treasure Hoarders could react, the warmth spreading across their necks had already made one thing abundantly clear: this was not someone they could handle.
"B-boss, what do we do? This one's too tough."
The Treasure Hoarder leader watched Su Bai casually twirling his fruit knife. Gritting his teeth, as if making a momentous decision, he dropped to his knees with a heavy thud under Su Bai's expectant gaze. Su Bai was dumbfounded. Where was the whole "rather die than surrender" spirit?
"Grandpa! Please spare us! We really didn't mean any harm!"
"Grandpa? I'm only eighteen! You really do want to go to the afterlife and leave our Parlor a good review, don't you?"
Seeing Su Bai pull out the fruit knife again, the Treasure Hoarder leader jolted and quickly corrected himself:
"No, no! Little brother! Little brother!"
"Little brother? That's what energetic young maidens, sophisticated mature ladies, and charming aunties call me. Which one are you? If you can't answer, Hu Tao gave me a sample box to pitch last time. I still have it on me. Want to try it out for free?"
The Treasure Hoarder leader now wanted to slap himself a few times. But his limited vocabulary couldn't come up with the right way to address Su Bai. He could only stare back pitifully.
"Call me handsome, uh—call me friend."
Su Bai had wanted to use a term he'd read in a book somewhere, but it felt too embarrassing, so he quickly changed his mind. The Treasure Hoarder leader was quick on the uptake, calling him "friend" repeatedly to Su Bai's satisfaction.
"Alright, alright. Since you've got some conscience and you're from Liyue, I'll let you off easy this time. But remember this: if I ever catch you robbing anyone again, I'll give you a free trial of our Parlor's services on the spot."
"Thank you, friend! Thank you! I'll be grateful to you for eight generations!"
Hearing that Su Bai was letting them go, the Treasure Hoarder leader showered him with thanks, even extending his gratitude to Su Bai's ancestors. The more Su Bai listened, the more his temper flared. If he hadn't promised not to kill them, he'd have scattered their ashes to the wind right then and there.
"One last piece of advice. Sometimes, if you're dumb, you should read more books. Read enough, and you'll find plenty of ways to make Mora. Now scram."
The Treasure Hoarders fled in panic. After running for a full ten minutes, one of the underlings finally caught his breath and asked his boss:
"Boss, are we still going to Mondstadt to do business?"
"Business, my foot! Didn't you see all our rations got scattered? This whole trip has been a disaster. Our very first robbery as a newly formed Treasure Hoarder crew, and we run into a tough nut like that."
The Treasure Hoarder leader pondered for a moment. He felt there might be some truth to what Su Bai had said. If he didn't read, he wouldn't even know the right way to beg for mercy next time.
"Let's head to Liyue Harbor's market and buy some books. Everyone's going to read them, got it? Next time we beg for mercy, I'm not doing all the talking by myself."
"What?!"
The underlings stared at their boss in stunned silence, their mouths hanging open in disbelief.