The second period was Defence Against the Dark Arts.
Unfortunately, it was being taught by Gilderoy Lockhart.
Victor entered the classroom with the rest of the students and immediately noticed the walls.
They were completely covered with large photographs of Lockhart — smiling, waving, posing dramatically, even one where he appeared to be signing books.
Every single one showed the same dazzling grin.
At the front of the room stood Lockhart himself, dressed in bright turquoise robes.
Victor sat down slowly.
Lockhart beamed at the class.
"Now then!"
Lockhart spread his arms as if presenting a grand spectacle.
"Let me introduce you to your new Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher — me! Gilderoy Lockhart, Order of Merlin, Third Class, Honorary Member of the Dark Force Defence League, and five-time winner of Witch Weekly's Most Charming Smile Award."
He flashed the very smile in question.
"But I don't talk about that," he added with theatrical modesty. "I didn't get rid of the Bandon Banshee by smiling at him."
Lockhart laughed heartily at his own joke.
No one else did.
Several of the girls, however, were staring at him with open admiration. A few whispered excitedly to one another, clearly impressed.
The boys looked far less convinced, exchanging puzzled glances as if trying to determine whether this was meant to be serious.
Victor turned his head slightly.
Hermione, seated beside him, was watching Lockhart with clear fascination. She wasn't quite swooning like some of the others, but she was very obviously impressed.
Victor sighed inwardly.
That smile again.
Lockhart had not stopped smiling since the class began. The expression seemed permanently fixed to his face, polished and practiced like a performance he had delivered a thousand times before.
Victor decided that needed to end.
He raised his hand.
Lockhart immediately noticed him. "Ah! Excellent enthusiasm!" he said, clearly pleased. "Yes, you there — the young gentleman."
Victor lowered his hand and spoke calmly.
"Professor, before the class begins, I have a question."
Lockhart smiled wider, clearly expecting praise.
"Yes, yes, of course! Curiosity is the first step to knowledge."
"In your book Break with a Banshee, you describe subduing the banshee by singing to it in Gaelic. According to most documented magical studies, banshees do not respond to music, only to mourning magic. Could you explain the mechanism behind that?"
The classroom fell quiet.
Hermione blinked.
Ron leaned toward Harry and whispered, "What did he just say?"
Lockhart's smile flickered for half a second before he quickly recovered it.
"Well now," he said with a light chuckle, waving a hand dismissively, "some of my techniques are rather… specialized. Trade secrets, you understand. A wizard who has accomplished as much as I have must keep a few professional methods to himself."
He flashed another dazzling smile at the class, clearly eager to move past the question.
"But excellent curiosity!" he added quickly. "Very admirable. Always good to see young minds taking such an interest in my work."
Victor said nothing.
Lockhart clapped his hands together briskly.
"Now then!" he announced. "Before we begin today's lesson, I thought we might start with a little test."
A few groans spread quietly through the classroom.
"Nothing to worry about!" Lockhart said cheerfully as he began handing out sheets of parchment. "Just a small quiz to see how carefully you've all read my books."
Victor took the parchment and glanced down.
The first question read:
What is Gilderoy Lockhart's favourite colour?
The second question followed immediately beneath it.
What is Gilderoy Lockhart's secret ambition?
Victor slowly lowered the parchment and looked back up at the professor standing proudly at the front of the room.
Across the table, Hermione was already writing furiously.
Victor glanced sideways at her.
"You actually studied for this," he said quietly.
Hermione didn't even look up. "Of course I did."
Behind Victor, Ron leaned forward over his parchment, squinting at the questions with growing disbelief.
"Look at these questions," he muttered to Harry. "They're all about him."
Harry glanced down at Ron's quiz sheet.
"What is Gilderoy Lockhart's favorite color?" he read quietly.
Ron jabbed his quill at the next line.
"And this one — What is Gilderoy Lockhart's greatest achievement to date?"
Harry turned his own parchment slightly, scanning further down.
"They're all like that."
Victor, seated directly in front of them, had already skimmed the sheet once. He leaned back slightly in his chair, clearly unimpressed.
Without turning around, he spoke calmly.
"Just write any nonsense," he said. "It's not as if this is a final examination."
Ron brightened immediately.
"That," he said, grabbing his quill again, "is the best advice I've heard all morning."
Hermione finally looked up from her parchment, frowning at the three of them.
"You're supposed to answer properly," she said. "He wrote the books himself."
Victor tilted his head slightly and glanced toward the front of the classroom, where Lockhart was watching the students with a self-satisfied smile.
"Yes," Victor said dryly. "That's why I'm writing my own preferences."
Ron leaned forward to look at Victor's parchment.
"What are you putting?"
"Blue," Victor said as he wrote.
"Is that actually his favorite color?"
"I have no idea."
Harry snorted quietly.
Hermione looked horrified. "You can't just make it up."
Victor glanced back at her.
"I can. I just did."
*****
A/N : 🔥 On Patreon, the story has already been updated up to Chapter 78🔥
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