I let the pen slip from my fingers.
"Your Highness?"
I picked it up again.
"Continue."
The chief aide resumed speaking. I nodded, stamped the documents, and turned the page. My hands moved with precision, my judgment remained cold. I made sure no one could notice the brief disturbance that had rippled inside me.
"Compile the rest separately and deliver it. Proceed with what can be handled first."
"Yes, Your Highness."
I rose from my seat and began to walk. I did not want to admit that my steps had quickened, so I tried to steady my pace—but it did not come easily.
If the one who fell into the lake had been acting under someone's orders, then the one who gave those orders might try to correct their failure. The infirmary's security was weak. If something worse were to happen within the palace, it would not be easy to quietly bury it. Even now, reporters were holding their breath, waiting for even the smallest crack to appear.
Therefore, I had to confirm it myself.
That was all.
…I told myself that was all.
I turned the corner of the corridor. The path to the infirmary led deep into the palace, toward the quarters where the royal physicians resided. In that section, the smell of medicinal herbs reached the nose before any trace of incense.
The physicians passing by immediately bowed upon seeing me.
"Your Highness, is there any discomfort—"
"Shh."
I raised my hand and cut off their greeting.
"There is a patient inside."
The moment those words left my mouth, I found myself faintly absurd. Why should I concern myself over whether there was a patient? The infirmary was a place for the sick.
And yet…
I found myself moving as though I hoped she would not wake.
I opened the door.
Inside the quiet room stood a single bed. I stepped toward it.
Seonmi lay there, still.
Unlike the face that had always confronted me with sharp, defiant eyes, the face resting with her eyes closed appeared strangely peaceful.
Each time a cough rose, her body trembled faintly upon the bed.
I had come only to confirm that nothing had happened.
But upon seeing her, a strange unease crept in—as though it would not end with mere confirmation.
My gaze would not leave her face.
She coughed again.
At the same time, her eyelids fluttered and slowly opened.
I turned my gaze away too late. Her voice had already caught me.
"Your Highness? What brings you here…?"
Her eyes blinked, and she hurriedly tried to sit up.
"Don't move."
As expected, she did not listen. Even while sitting up, she coughed repeatedly.
"What are you—!"
Her eyes widened in surprise.
This woman… every time, she threw a stone into the emotions I had carefully kept under control, stirring them into ripples.
An utterly unpleasant woman.
I suppressed the emotion that had surfaced and spoke again.
"Next time, do not act so foolishly. In situations like that, you must also know when to yield. Only then can you prepare for what comes next."
After a brief silence, her voice followed.
"Your Highness. Forgive me for saying this, but even if I were to return to that moment, I would act the same. I have only one opportunity given to me. The moment I lose… there is no next. Perhaps this is something difficult for someone in your position to understand."
Her voice sounded like a candle about to go out.
But her words did not.
Without realizing it, I let out a short laugh.
Because it was so very like her.
"The fact that you're talking back to me like this… it seems you are recovering."
"It is all thanks to Your Highness."
She bowed her head.
Considering she had nearly died, it seemed only natural to accept at least this much gratitude.
"I will not expel the head maid. No matter what she has done to you."
"..."
"The current head maid is competent. And if she were removed, we would need to select a replacement. That would be troublesome."
I chose to keep the head maid who had ordered her death.
As I said, she was capable at her work.
Whatever might happen between them…
it was not something I needed to concern myself with.
Of course, I would ensure that nothing like this happened again.
But still—
she said nothing.
"Are you disappointed?"
"No."
"Then why that expression?"
"I expected that you would make such a choice, Your Highness."
My eyes narrowed slightly.
"Why?"
"Because you are someone who never concerns yourself with the small branches, but only with the trunk and the roots."
"..."
"And yet… I was surprised that you came here. I will repay everything you have done for me, Your Highness."
She did not avoid my gaze.
And for the first time—
I saw a clear emotion in her eyes.
Something inside my chest cracked, quietly.
I did not like that sensation.
And yet—
that strange feeling held me in place.
In that brief moment when my gaze lingered on her once more,
I had already betrayed myself.
After a short silence, I turned my body completely toward the door.
The longer I looked at her face,
the more the boundary between judgment and emotion blurred.
"What you said is correct. I do not concern myself with small branches. I came only because I feared that a twisted branch might grow further and affect the rest. So do not assign meaning to it. In any case, there is nothing you can do for me."
I opened the door and walked out.
Everything I had just said—
was correct.
But what I had just felt…
was not.
◆◆
Thanks to the Crown Prince's consideration, I was able to focus on treatment, and before long my body recovered to the point where I could even outrun Jeong Najeong.
The fact that Kim Sera—the one who had ordered my death—was still in the palace felt unsettling, but after that she treated me as if I were completely invisible, not even sparing me a glance. Strangely enough, that was better.
In truth, I found myself thinking more about Crown Prince Go Won than about her.
If he hadn't saved me that night at the lake, I wouldn't be here breathing like this now.
And yet, I still couldn't understand it.
The fact that he personally came to the infirmary where I was—was it really, as he said, simply because of his duties?
Was that truly all?
He told me not to attach meaning to it.
And yet the more I tried not to, the more meaning I found myself searching for.
"Hey! What are you thinking about so hard that you're barely even pretending to eat?"
Jeong Najeong waved her hand in front of my unfocused eyes.
Through the gap between her fingers, I saw Go Won passing through the corridor by the window.
As if drawn by a magnet, I abruptly stood up and began walking toward him.
"Where are you going in the middle of eating!"
I ignored her call.
For the first time—
my steps were chasing after him.
And now,
I was standing in front of Go Won.
A face as smooth as cold glass. Lines so sharp they seemed as though they would shatter if touched by emotion. The gaze that fell upon me was indifferent, and the shape of his eyes did not waver in the slightest.
"What is it?"
Of course—
I had nothing to say.
I didn't even know why I had walked over to where he was.
Was I trying to find meaning in something he himself had denied?
My lips moved slightly, but no words came.
Instead, I lowered my head deeply.
"Your Highness, I hope you are well!"
It was an unnatural greeting.
My voice came out louder than I intended.
When no response followed, I carefully straightened my back.
Normally, after receiving a greeting, he would have already walked past.
But today—
he stood there, staring directly at me.
There was no interest in his gaze.
At least—
that was how it appeared.
And yet…
I could feel it.
The amount of time his gaze lingered over my face was longer than when he looked at anyone else.
"You seem to have fully recovered, judging by that voice."
I lifted the corners of my lips as though nothing was wrong,
but the trembling at the tips of my fingers had already betrayed my embarrassment.
"It is thanks to Your Highness."
No matter how I looked at his face,
I could never read what he was thinking.
This brief silence—
was one of the ways he suppressed his emotions.
He drew in a small breath.
"If a maid collapses, it creates a gap in manpower. Efficiency drops. That is all."
The fact that he explained his kindness in such concrete terms made it seem as though he truly didn't want to be misunderstood.
It seemed he still held nothing but unfavorable feelings toward me.
Even though he had suppressed it,
it was obvious.
To him,
I was nothing more than a servant—
a replaceable part of the palace.
It wasn't surprising.
And yet,
those last words
stabbed somewhere deep in my chest.
"…Yes, Your Highness."
After that,
we simply stood there, looking at one another in silence.
His expression did not change.
Not a single movement in his brows.
Not in the corners of his lips.
Not even in his eyes.
A perfectly composed face—
as though it had never allowed emotion to exist in the first place.
But…
within that perfection,
I saw something.
For just a brief moment—
his expression loosened.
"Do not overexert yourself."
And just as quickly,
that loosened expression disappeared.
He returned to being the Crown Prince.
Cold.
Perfect.
Expressionless.
Leaving only that one sentence behind,
he turned and walked away.
Compared to how he usually was,
it was a rather considerate remark.
But the words were spoken so softly
that I couldn't tell whether they were an order
or concern.
His actions, his tone, his expression—
none of them ever matched.
He always left me with questions.
Made me search for meaning.
I shook my head, like a wet dog shaking off water.
Since when had I been thinking so seriously about the Crown Prince?
I'm just a maid.
I should focus on doing the work I've been given in this palace.
I must not forget
the reason I came here in the first place.