"No offence, dear goddess. But there's no such goddess as Dallah Thaun," I remarked. I tried my best to hide the suspicion in my voice.
"And it's important it remains that way. This meeting never happened, by the way," Dallah Thaun said to me with a wink.
A secret goddess? Oh, this keeps getting better and better.
"If you know my original name, would I be correct in assuming you are responsible for my transmigration?" I asked.
"Yes indeed! I'm glad I picked such someone so quick on the uptake as my CHOSEN," she said gleefully.
I couldn't help but grit my teeth. Clearly, she was purposely emphasizing that particular word. "I can't help but notice I don't have any of the advantages usually conferred to a god's Chosen."
"Sure you do. You have the divine ability to cast Cure Light Wounds twice a day, Slow Poison twice a day, and Draw upon Holy Might once a day. Later, you'll get a second charge of Draw upon Holy Might."
Now I was certain she was teasing me. "Again, no offense meant, dear wise and powerful goddess. But I'm quite sure you just shamelessly said that knowing fully well that those powers didn't come from you, and knowing that I knew that too."
"But of course! I'm the most shameless goddess in all of Faerun! Well, technically I don't exist in Faerun, but when have details like that ever stopped me?" Dallah Thaun said, cackling. "Besides, surely you don't expect a secret goddess to actually bless her chosen, thus risking revealing herself?"
The coin twirling in her fingers were giving me an idea of what she was about. "So you stole another god's child as your own Chosen."
"Tadah! So quick on the uptake. I knew I chose my Chosen well. It's not like Bhaal can complain, since he's dead."
I was slowly putting it together. "You purposely transmigrated me as a child of Bhaal. I'm not even sure how you can do that but let's just run with it-"
"I guide souls to the afterlife. Or reincarnation, as it were. Halfling souls, technically, but you are one now."
"-Right. Anyway, you chose me out of the passengers on MHXX since I had played the game Baldur's Gate and I am bound to succeed," I continued.
Dallah Thaun summoned a chair from her own shadow, which she turned around, and sat with her chin resting on the back of the chair, smug.
I continued, "I might have some memory of you because you appeared briefly to explain my transmigration. Then before Is started the character generation, you wiped my memories so that your secret is kept safe."
Dallah Thaun sat up straight. Her face suddenly lost it's cheerful demeanor. "No, that's where you're wrong."
Really? I waited for her to explain.
For the first time during our conversation, the dark goddess had a serious look on her face. "It was you who asked for your memories of your previous life to be wiped, not I."
"What? Why-" I started to protest, but caught myself.
Ah, considering what my past life was, the answer was rather self-evident.
"I wanted a fresh start. A new life in my favorite game, a world where I never endured such horrible personal tragedies," I concluded.
Dallah Thaun sighed. "But the dead vestige of Bhaal found your lost memories and showed them to you. I'm not even sure how a dead god can torture you like that. Though, we gods that not existent have an issue with staying non-existent," she said with sadness in her eyes. "We had hoped to spare you that pain, at least."
"...We?" I asked.
Dallah got up from her chair, pushed it aside and spun around. Where there was one beautiful goddess there was now two. The second goddess had brown hair, wore a green and yellow. She had the countenance of a matron. A mother...
"... Yondalla?" I stammered out, then got down on my knees immediately.
Dallah Thaun pouted. "What gives? You didn't show me that level of respect!"
"Because he didn't know if you really were who you said you were. He doesn't even know you exist," Yondalla explained.
Ah, Dallah Thaun is the other side of Yondalla. A dark sister.
...wait. I pointed a finger at Dallah Thaun. "Now I remember! You're source book material outside of the Forgotten Realms! Why are you even present here!"
Dallah Thaun just smiled, and gestured towards Yondalla.
The gears in my head moved. "...it's because Yondalla is here. Since you're part of Yondalla, anywhere she is present, you are also? ...can be also? No, I don't think it should work like that."
"Didn't I already say? This meeting never happened. It's not even happening now, in fact," Dallah Thaun said.
Gah, metaphysics! Two in one, three in one, trinity and omnipresence, none of it makes sense to mortal minds!
So what happens now?
I bowed my head. "Thank you both. For everything. Bringing me here was the best thing that could happen to me."
"I am glad to hear it. But you're not out of the woods yet, so to speak," Yondalla said, with concern in her eyes. "You have chosen to act honorably with the knowledge you have. Yet, your actions have exchanged a certain future for the uncertain. Given the uncertainty, are you sure you can handle what is to come?"
"Certain? No, nothing is ever certain," I admitted. I looked up with a smile at the two goddesses. "But what's life without a little risk? I'd rather do what I really want rather than only walk to easy road in my new life."
Both goddesses smiled, beaming with pride.
"Well said, my Chosen," Dallah Thaun said.
I ain't never going to consent to that until I get a blessing from her. No freebies!
"-but there is one last matter we would like to resolve before you go back to your friends," Dallah Thaun continued. "Seeing as how you've seen the worst bits already, there's no need to hide the rest of your memories anymore."
I hesitated. "Is that... really a good idea?"
I was afraid. Truly, utterly afraid.
Yondalla put up a hand. She had a gentle smile on her face. "I assure you, receiving back all your memories will be well worth it."
"Man up, my Chosen," Dallah Thaun said. Her voice was gentle.
The two goddesses reached for my face, and said together, "After all, when our loved ones pass on, it is the duty of the ones who are left to grieve, and eventually move on."
Ah, I remember now. So that's where I got those words from.
---
I received my memories in full.
I remember my father, a guest in my house, attempting to strike my with a vase when my back was turned. I remember defending myself, and he fell over and hit his head, hard.
I remember the trial, long and hard, but in the end I was vindicated.
I remember after the trial, reevaluating my life.
I remembered setting up a drug rehab centre, in memory of my sister.
I remembered setting up a shelter for abandoned families, in memory of my mother.
I remember being meeting someone special in another country, a Malaysian woman. Ah, but our time was cut short. Thankfully she wasn't on the flight with me. A small part of me was thankful someone would mourn my passing. I hoped she found someone else to keep her company.
I remembered happier times, with my mother, my sister, even my idiot father.
Why did I give up on these memories? Life isn't only filled with sorrow. It is also filled with joy. The bitter and the sweet, mixing together brings flavor to a life well-lived.
When our loved ones pass on, it is the duty of the ones who are left to grieve, and eventually move on.
I had already passed on. It was way past time to grieve for what was lost, and move on with my new life.
And right now, there were bad guys to foil, and the Sword Coast to save.
"Godspeed, young halfling," the two goddesses said, and disappeared.