Dumbledore liked comfy chairs.
But he couldn't sit in one right now, as he didn't know whether it'd be seen as a breach of propriety and manners to conjure a chair for himself rather than use the one offered. It wasn't very comfortable. He realized, on some level, that it might be intentionally uncomfortable, as if to put him in a more precarious position, which he already knew he was in.
He was the one making the request, after all, and all the weight of the ICW's Supreme Mugwump meant absolutely nothing in front of the Kanto Magical Association's leader, one Konoemon Konoe, as he was not dealing with a wizard.
Indeed, Konoemon was a Mage, not a Wizard, and though some would contest the difference, any who knew would be able to explain it to you.
Dumbledore had no special power here. He was just an old man, asking for a favor from another old man, and while he longed for the days when he could relax, right now he found himself more tense than ever.
"You're asking for quite a bit," Konoemon explained, raising one of his exceptionally bushy eyebrows. Dumbledore found himself momentarily mesmerized by the odd, disturbing shape of the man's head. No doubt the end result of magical experiments gone horribly wrong.
"I know," Dumbledore said, "but I promised his parents I'd guarantee his safety, and I am willing to do whatever it takes to do so. I failed them grievously already, and I will do everything in my power to not do so completely," he explained. "As such, I am willing to negotiate a price you find convenient, for this favor."
The younger of the two old men chuckled. "A nonspecific favor," he said, shaking his head, before looking at Dumbledore for a few seconds. "You know this is a breach of the non interference agreements," Konoemon stated.
"I understand this," Dumbledore said, "but there are murky and grey legal loopholes I am very much willing to utilize to ensure that this doesn't grow out of hand. They are family, after all, before they are wizards or mages," he said.
"Truth, family is very important," Konoemon said, nodding. "Very well, then, so be it. Though it is not me you must convince. He has more than earned the right to make such decisions for himself, and I know full well that each and every one of his students will support him in whichever decision he makes."
"But you know which choice he'd make, do you not?" Albus asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Of course. Genius though he might be, he is painfully predictable at times," Konoemon said, chuckling. "I have no doubts about what his answer will be."
"You agreed!?"
Dumbledore winced at the volume of the yell that had shook all of them, as a dozen, if not more, teenaged girls, all clearly asian in features, came spilling through the paper doors that separated the room he'd been having his "private" meeting with the young Springfield in.
He'd known they were there, of course, and so had the boy he'd been speaking to. He hadn't expected them to react this violently, but it hadn't been a surprise in its entirety.
"Well, he is my family, Chisame-san," Haru said, turning around to the girl who seemed to be at the bottom of the pile.
The long bearded, long haired Headmaster of Hogwarts smiled a little as he saw the brown haired girl begin to berate the boy for his irresponsibility and lack of foresight. He could detect no ill will or even real anger in her tone as she spoke. No, she spoke out of worry for her... friend, he supposed, for her teacher. Maybe she felt some sort of responsibility as a big sister figure of some sort.
Even if she was berating him as a wife would berate an irresponsible husband.
As she stopped, a flood of other people began to talk, and Dumbledore felt it'd be a long afternoon. He silently thanked Crouch for having taken the time to teach Dumbledore the basics of many languages. Specifically, though, he thanked Crouch for teaching him how to say "I'm sorry, I don't speak Language, could we use English instead?" in Japanese.
That came in extremely handy at times.
Nearly an hour later, of the horde of teenaged girls and a young boy, only two and the boy remained, as they approached a small, lonely cottage in the woods.
"You... What?"
Haru squirmed under the gaze of the woman who'd taught him practically everything he knew about Dark Magic. The very Tidings of Darkness herself, the Master of Puppets, the High Daylight Walker... and a plethora of other titles that she'd forgotten. Evangeline McDowell was clearly unhappy about the fact that her apprentice had just adopted his own fifteen months old cousin. "Well... He had nowhere else to go, so I—"
"Accepted before he even had the situation explained to him," Chisame said with a sneer on her face, running a hand through her face before settling two fingers on the bridge of her nose after she'd moved her glasses so they didn't bother her while she did it. "You know this idiot, if anyone needs help, he'll jump headfirst into anything."
"Well, if I had family, I wouldn't want them to wind up in an orphanage or something," Asuna commented from Haru's other side, throwing an arm around his shoulder in a silent gesture of support, and also to steady him lest he crumble in the face of Evangeline's anger.
"And how does this matter to me? It's YOUR responsibility now," Evangeline said, frowning and glaring at the three idiots, as she saw them.
"The dorms aren't a good place to raise a child. There's very little space. So..." Asuna began, with a wily smile on her face.
"Oh, no. No way. You're not dumping the kid on me! You accepted this responsibility, dammit!" the blonde yelled, pointing a dainty finger in her apprentice's face.
"B-But Master, we can't raise Harry in the dorms..." Haru said, squirming a little under Evangeline's glare. "We're already a little cramped as it is, and it's not safe for children there..."
"Oh, and it's safe for children with me, the most dangerous criminal ever!?" Evangeline asked, rhetorically.
Haru nodded enthusiastically. "Yes! You're really nice, Master, and so strong that nobody would bother you!" he said, smiling in such a way as if he didn't, in any way, shape or form doubt that what he was saying was true.
Evangeline blushed slightly. "Nice!?" she protested.
"I don't think he's a good judge of character," Chisame commented, flatly.
"You're right," Asuna added.
"HEY! Wait—why am I protesting!? I'm not nice! I'm evil!" Evangeline said, shaking her head. "And I said no! I'm not going to take care of your brat for you! Don't bring it into my home!"
"But Master... you're the only one who has a house big enough on campus..." Haru said, before looking down for a few seconds. He took a deep breath and remembered something. "If you let us use your home, I'll lick your feet like I promised back when you accepted to train me," he said, his face morphing into a determined one.
Asuna protested, raising her hand as if to lecture him, but Haru turned to her and shook his head.
Chisame snorted. "He's done worse things for power anyway," she said, reminiscing about things she'd rather forget.
"That's not enough, boy!" Evangeline said. "If I'm going to do this, you're going to have to agree to do everything I tell you! And I'm not going to raise this kid myself, at this home, so you're going to have to move here, too!"
Asuna and Chisame both looked at each other. Before Haru could as much as say a word, both of their fists came down upside his head, and stopped him cold.
"Yeah, no. We're not letting you walk into an agreement with terms THAT open," Chisame said, simply.
"Even I'm not that stupid," Asuna said, glaring at him.
"But I have to!" Haru protested. "Besides, Master is nice. I'm sure she won't make me do anything that's very painful or humiliating... right?" he asked, turning a hopeful look towards Evangeline.
She grinned, evilly, as she crossed her arms and looked at them with contempt. "Of course not, boy... you're just going to have to become my husband, is all."
"You ARE aware that's illegal, right?" Asuna asked.
"It's just a head start, Kagurazaka," Evangeline said, grinning widely. "I'll stake my claim on the boy now to avoid problems when he's legal," she said, shrugging.
Chisame frowned. "You can't be thinking of accepting this," she said, looking at where Haru stood, eyes closed and thinking, a serious frown on his face.
He nodded. "You're right. I don't need to think," he said, opening his eyes. "I accept."
Evangeline promptly lost her grin. "Wa—really?" she asked, a curious expression on her face.
"Yes," Haru confirmed, nodding, with an easy smile on his face. "I like Master, so I don't think it'd be too bad to be married," he said.
Hearing this, Evangeline let out a loud, triumphant laugh that would haunt the nightmares of small children for centuries.