Zac was practically drooling over the pirate owl. So violent, so detached, trying to act like he was above it all. But I know deep down he just wants a hug, Zac thought, his eyes tracing the line of Andras's coat. And maybe someone warm to thrust into. He watched Andras flick the blood off his cutlass. Mmmmm, stab me right in the rear with your pokey stick, you absolutely despicable asshole.
Before Zac could try to make a move, Andras was yanked backward.
He stumbled into a circle of enraged fish pirates who had seemingly materialized from the shadows, a sea dragon, a catfish-man with writhing barbels, a pufferfish blown up to the size of a beach ball, and a pulsating jellyfish-woman.
Andras's feathers puffed out as he regained his balance in the middle of the corsairs. "You fucked up."
The owl pirate kicked the decapitated eel head at his feet, sending it skidding across the floor. The sea dragon dodged it easily and laughed, a wet, bubbling sound.
"You fucked with the wrong crew," it gurgled. "Now you're gonna be chum."
However, the head kept soaring. It hit a nearby table where a gaggle of sharks were playing five-finger fillet. One of the sharks howled in pain as the sudden impact made them stab their own hand, driving the blade clean through the webbing.
Zac watched, a bit stunned. Is he really going to fight an entire pirate crew for me? Oh, he loves me too, doesn't he? He just doesn't have the vocabulary or the emotional maturity to say it, but I can tell.
The shark-man was yelling for the dead man who interrupted them, but as Zac watched, the other sharks at the table did not seem to be looking for the head-kicker. They were looking at the blood. They were looking quite... hungry.
The shark demons began to vibrate, their eyes rolling back into their heads until only the whites showed. They looked feral. The other patrons in the bar slowly grew quiet, the piano player faltering mid-note.
"You missed!" the jellyfish laughed, in a strangely jelly-ish voice… Zac didn't know what jelly sounded like, but this was definitely it: wet, squelchy, and condescending. "Now prepare to die!"
Andras smoothly sidestepped a poisonous tentacle. "Did I miss?"
A yell of fear ripped through the tavern. Zac looked over. The sharks were attacking their bleeding comrade. It wasn't a fight; it was a massacre. They tore into him with rows of serrated teeth, blood spraying across the room. Then, tasting blood in the water (or air), they turned outward. They began to randomly attack anyone close, overturning tables and biting anything that moved.
The privateers surrounding Andras finally looked over, their faces losing the confidence that being part of a gang gives weak men.
"FEEDING FRENZY! RUN!" the octopus barman yelled, ducking behind the counter.
Before Zac could even comprehend the idea of a demonic shark attack on land, the bar erupted into absolute madness.
Zac passively watched as the wave of carnage quickly approached. Customers were yelling and scrambling out the doors and windows, the sharks biting anything they could get their teeth on. Blood and viscera flew around like confetti at a particularly morbid parade.
Well, I guess this is why March doesn't want drinking in his keep, Zac thought, wiping a stray drop of blood from his cheek. Some people really can't hold their alcohol. I would have thought demons would have had plenty of time to build up some sort of tolerance.
A disembodied dorsal fin splattered onto the floor next to him with a wet thud.
As Zac turned to tell Andras that he seemed to have upset the other bar-goers, he saw the owl blocking the pirate crew's escape. Andras stood between the fish-man gang and the door, looking quite annoyed while holding his sword out. The fishy freebooters looked absolutely terrified but unable to get past.
"Those sharks will kill you too!" the catfish-man squelched, his barbels vibrating. "Are you insane?!"
Andras laughed, a low, confident hoot. "I already deal with a mutt every day. Do you think some angry sea-dogs can faze me?"
The yells and bubbling of multiple customers being bitten to death filled the air. Zac rolled his eyes. So dramatic. I can't even hear the swindler Strigiforme being all detached and cool.
Half a torso flew by, hitting the pufferfish-man and knocking him into the sea dragon. The sea dragon howled in pain as the pufferfish's spines sank in. The pufferfish tried to dislodge himself, but he was like velcro, the half-body and his crewmate pinned cushioned to him in a grotesque embrace.
"Fuck this!" the jellyfish shouted, trying to run past Andras.
Andras's sword flashed. He easily sliced a third of the jellyfish off, causing the semi-translucent anthropomorphic invertebrate to collapse into a mushy, quivering blob. "You wanted to play, didn't you?" Andras said, his voice cold. "So let's play."
The catfish-man looked over from trying to peel the sea dragon off the pufferfish, his eyes wide. "They'll kill you too, you moron! Everyone knows sharks can't control their bloodlust!"
Zac glanced over. The scene was gruesome... sharks ripping apart a shrimp-man, eating the roe out of a sturgeon demon, crushing the shell of a lobster brawler like it was made of paper. A red eyed bull shark, noticing the group of living bodies foolish enough to have not evacuated yet, turned and began running toward them, jaws snapping.
Hmmm, Zac thought, eyeing the frenzied predator. Better than the eel guy. Maybe they aren't Junbei hot, but... Zac shivered. Claspers. Just like Bune.