|You have witnessed a once-in-a-lifetime incident.|
Reis would prefer it if he hadn't. His blood pressure was failing him anyway. Any more stress, and he'd be a goner. "Don't mind it. It's a young kitten, it doesn't know what it's doing."
As if making excuses for himself wasn't hard enough with the mind reader, now he was doing it for the furball, too.
Mr. Guardian tilted his head slightly with a judgmental gaze. "Are you trying to protect it?"
With how Reis had pressed the ball of fur against himself while covering it with his hands, it would seem. But he was just trying to create a visual distance between the supposed predator and prey. Out of sight, out of mind.
"Uh…did you like the room?"
"Don't try to change the subject."
Then what was he supposed to do? Let the foolish kitty become a meal for this entity? Reis wouldn't be able to sleep at night if he let that happen. Rules barely protected him from being killed; there was none in effect for this kitten with no sense of survival.
The great guardian looked at him as though he had said something worse than what he had ever said until now. Correction, thought until now. Reis seemed to have a hidden talent for offending the Guardian simply by existing.
But the retribution for his actions didn't fall on him this time, thanks to the dedicated workers at the palace.
*Knock*
"Lunch is ready, Your Highness."
Keith returned with the food exactly eight minutes later. Long eight minutes that felt like an hour for a certain prince, but still on time.
"Prepare the table then." Reis then looked at the half-furious guardian. 'Would you like to try the food, Lord Yavarin?'
Thankfully, the human creature couldn't read the great lord's mind unless spoken to, otherwise he'd have a long-standing trauma planted into a bright corner of his mind. Bright enough to show up every day.
"Prepare two chairs."
Despite not getting an answer, Reis ordered anyway. After all, the divine creature hadn't eaten anything since morning either. Whether he needed to or not wasn't really his concern. But he still had to make sure he didn't seem unusual.
The experienced butler prepared two sets of silverware and drinks even without the direct order. Soon, the warm fragrance of food filled the room.
Reis set the now sleeping kitten down onto the pillow and got down from the bed. His legs had fallen asleep from sitting for so long, causing him to hold the bed for balance.
Also causing the staff to go into another fit of silent panic. "We can serve it to your bed, your highness!"
For what? The table was literally two steps away from the bed. "No need. Leave for now."
Once the staff was gone, Reis looked at Yvaion once again. "You do eat right?"
Cause he definitely wasn't capable of finishing all that food on the table no matter how hungry he was.
"You were certain I was going to swallow the collection of fur. Why are you asking now?"
"That was a figure of speech…I feared you'd harm it. Please take a seat."
Surprisingly, the man listened this time, taking the chair as Reis served food onto the plate.
If the servants saw this scene, they'd probably report it to the king immediately. Then he'd be suspected of being possessed or of being an impersonator. Execution the next day. "The food here is very good. Even though I've seen more varieties of it back home, they taste really nice."
Reis himself didn't know why he was even trying this. As a distraction, this was probably the worst one. But he had no way to know if the guardian got hungry. If he wasn't a God, he needed food for sustenance, right?
Only after giving a sample of each dish onto the plate did he take a seat. "Please try it."
The great guardian observed the collection of colors before him. Humans sure put more effort into the appearance of the food than into the benefits. This assortment of dishes barely amounted to a drop of energy a divine creature might need for sustenance.
But he was also curious about what human food tasted like. Under the hopeful eyes of the weak creature, he bit into one of the safer-looking options.
Reis stared with anticipation. If this worked, he wouldn't have to worry about offerings for a good while. He could simply get food prepared for the guardian.
But who knew the great lord would make such a face before spitting it out like it was the most awful thing in the world?
Reis's fork clattered against his plate. The dumbfounded prince tasted the food to see if it had too much salt or something. But it tasted just fine.
"Who made this abomination?"
The finest chefs in the kingdom. Handpicked by the queen herself. Those who probably never had their food called anything close to an abomination in their life.
"But…It tastes fine…why?" Why must all his plans fail before he even tries them properly?
"Compared to this awful mixture of energy, the ball of fur would definitely taste better."
"You cannot! It…it…" Reis struggled for words. Never had he imagined having to go into war with an otherworldly being over a cat. But with how things were going, that seemed to be the end of his story.
"It what?"
Reis weakly pointed at the kitten. "Have you seen it? This creature has done nothing wrong in its entire life." Well, maybe except licking a certain someone's finger.
"Hmm. Is that so?"
"Yes!" What could the curled-up ball of fur ever do to equal a crime? Nothing.
Yvaion stood up, leaning over the table until his face was inches from Reis's. "Then make sure to keep it safe. I'll be eyeing it." He spoke with the scariest smile. Or it was just Reis's personal filter. "Finish the food as well, since you like it so much."
The guardian walked away, leaving the human on the brink of hell. A hell full of worry. The mutterings grew, but he didn't mind. It wasn't nearly as awful as the food.
He dared accuse him? The great lord feared across realms? Of something as minor as eating a weak mortal creature? Then let him live in that fear.
Reis picked the fork back up with the hand that wouldn't stop shaking. Great. Now he had to be a security guard too.
Meanwhile, the creature that had become a subject of war all of a sudden had no idea of what was going on while it was simply snoring away on the comfort of the pillows. And it would continue to do so for years to come.