Naruto and Sasuke really were a pair of unlucky lovebirds.
Sasuke no longer needed to summon Manda to tank Deidara's self-destruction. Now it was Naruto's turn to summon Kurama to block a high-pressure 'water cannon'.
Once upon a time, there was a story.
A woodcutter heard the legend of a fox repaying kindness, so he scattered animal traps all over a snowy mountain, hoping to catch a fox that would repay him.
Hard work paid off. He found one.
After rescuing the fox, he went home and waited.
But after several days, the woodcutter did not get a beautiful fox woman visiting his home to repay him. Instead, a bowl of steaming white porridge appeared in his house every day.
After enjoying the porridge for a week, the woodcutter went out and heard the story of the sea-snail maiden.
He thought, 'Could it be that the fox is repaying me while I'm away by making porridge?'
So the woodcutter went home early and watched from the shadows.
Then he saw a male fox messing around in his kitchen.
And that was the story of "Turn gay through carelessness."
Sure enough, the cycle of heaven spared no one.
In the story, the male fox repaid kindness with betrayal and caused the woodcutter to lose his innocence through carelessness.
In reality, the male fox Kurama had been screwed over by Naruto and also lost innocence through carelessness!
"Tailed Beast Bomb!"
Naruto controlled Kurama and fired the thing in its mouth toward the distant sky.
Naruto had not yet mastered the Tailed Beast Bomb.
Him shouting "Tailed Beast Bomb" here was basically the same as when he fought Kiba during the Chūnin Exams and shouted "Rasengan" while holding a balloon full of shit.
This move of Naruto's had quite a bit of his father Namikaze Minato's style of transferring Tailed Beast Bombs.
Likewise, it contained the exact same logistical problem.
Teleporting a Tailed Beast Bomb out to sea carried an implied meaning: moving it to an empty place where innocent people would not be harmed.
But were there really no innocent people at sea?
That was the Ten-Tails' Tailed Beast Bomb, complete with an enormous blast radius.
What if there were island clusters nearby within the Land of Water or Land of Lightning's territory?
What if fishermen were out on the water?
Even if the surface was clear, what about the fish in the ocean?
With one teleport, Namikaze Minato might have blown up over a billion fish. The next time someone brought him back with Edo Tensei, he would be shocked to discover he received the Deep Sea King treatment!
The moment he stepped into a puddle, every fish-type summon would attack him with suicidal rage!
Similarly, Naruto fired his "Tailed Beast Bomb" into the distance.
But what goes up must come down.
Even if it exploded in midair, it would still rain down somewhere like a torrential shower.
"Huh? Grandma, isn't that the direction of our house?" Tamaki, who had just squeezed to the front of the crowd with Cat Granny, stared at the terrifying sky.
As mentioned before, the two of them lived outside Konoha in an abandoned town called the Empty District.
Naruto did not even know Cat Granny and Tamaki, so how could he possibly know people and ninja cats lived in those ruins?
"Phew."
Naruto blocked the 'high-pressure water cannon' spraying toward the villagers.
He let out a breath of relief, dispelled the Tailed Beast cloak, and landed back on the dirt.
Inside the mental space, Kurama finally felt the old wad of phlegm in its throat clear out.
Its twitching body stopped.
But Kurama did not get up. Under the concerned gazes of the other Tailed Beasts, two lines of clear tears flowed down its massive face.
"Kurama, cheer up! We Tailed Beasts were forged in mountains of blades. Don't embarrass us." Shukaku offered "comfort" with the smug attitude of someone happily watching the drama burn.
Normally, Kurama would have snapped back.
But right now, Kurama only wanted peace.
And no, don't ask who Peace was.
Seeing Kurama stay silent, the other Tailed Beasts retreated to the side, giving the fox some space.
After the others backed off, Kurama's expression darkened.
As the transit-station administrator linking the other Tailed Beasts—basically holding admin privileges—Kurama opened a private chat with Naruto that the others could not hear.
[Naruto, next time, try borrowing the power of the other Tailed Beasts. I'll just assist and supplement you from the sidelines. You need to get familiar with using their chakra too.]
It was a perfectly normal suggestion.
"Got it. Thanks for reminding me, Kurama." Naruto smiled. "But don't worry! If I run into another dangerous situation like today, you'll still be the first one I think of!"
Naruto felt touched by how kind and supportive Kurama sounded!
[...]
Hearing Naruto vow to think of him first, Kurama had no idea how to argue back.
The fox could only pray the next "danger" wouldn't involve this specific brand of horror.
"Naruto, I... What happened to me?"
"Woof, woof."
Kiba's voice echoed across the courtyard.
Naruto snapped back to reality and looked over, jumping in fright.
Kiba's body was covered in thick fur, topped with two dog ears.
Behind his head sat Akamaru's dog face; the barking just now had come from the snout on the back of his skull.
The previous two-headed dog fusion had been abstract as hell. But this current... two-faced version was even more ridiculous.
On top of that, Kiba's hands morphed into dog paws, and a tail wagged behind him.
He looked exactly like the tragic result of failing to balance ninja dog natural energy!
Of course, ninja dogs did not possess a senjutsu inheritance like the Three Great Sage Regions.
The key point was that Kiba's current, bizarre Sage Mode state could be described with one extremely fitting term.
Almost everyone present, including the Konoha villagers, could blurt it out in unison.
A furry degenerate.
The crowd's expressions shifted as they stared between Kiba and Naruto.
"Kiba, that's amazing! You mastered Sage Mode too! Remember this feeling. From now on, you're a legendary ninja who can stand shoulder to shoulder with me and Pervy Sage!" Naruto ran over and gave Kiba a massive hug.
"Huh? Sage Mode? Me?" Kiba remained confused.
But hearing Naruto's praise, he could not help feeling a surge of pride.
He could stand shoulder to shoulder with Lord Jiraiya, one of the legendary Sannin?
A power up like this actually existed?
Kiba's personality mirrored Naruto's.
But Naruto's pet was the god-tier Nine-Tails, while Kiba's pet was Akamaru.
That was the brutal gap between them.
That difference left Kiba with ambitions far larger than his actual ability. He had the loud mouth, but not the matching power.
Kiba knew this.
It just wasn't something he could fix overnight, leaving him to accept the cruel reality of his own mediocrity.
But now? He had mastered... Sage Mode?
"Yeah!" Naruto grabbed Kiba's dog paw in excitement. "Kiba, try out your strength, speed, and senses now. Haven't they leveled up by a huge amount?"
"Uh, I'll try." Kiba's brain remained frozen.
Right now, whatever Naruto suggested, he just followed along like he was completing a mission.
Kiba tried the most direct test first: a ninja dog's specialty, the sense of smell.
He took a light sniff, and his eyes lit up.
"Naruto, did you just eat a ship? Wait, no, that's the smell from the charm!"
Naruto: "..."
Naruto felt like Kiba did that on purpose.
Kiba said something similar earlier, back when the streets were empty and he was saving Naruto's life.
So why act like he just discovered it now in front of a massive crowd?
This was repaying kindness with betrayal!
In that case, Naruto could not be blamed for being heartless.