Chapter 97: Three Women, One Stage
"Morning, Sakaki-sensei. Feeling a bit more sober now, huh?"
"…"
"Why so quiet? That's not like you at all, Sensei. Oh right—when are you handing over that 150,000 yen bounty? I'm seriously itching to get my hands on it."
"…"
"Sensei, why are you being so cold? Did I do something wrong?"
"Ah-ho! (Idiot!) You got hanged upside-down all night and you're still this energetic? Wait—why the hell am I hanging here too? And the Elder personally sealed my ki on top of it!"
Takumi and Sakaki were both trussed up and dangling from the ceiling like two grasshoppers tied to the same string. Ever since Shigure dragged them back from the neighboring mountain town yesterday, they'd been left like this. Sakaki, naturally, was fuming.
"You moron! Didn't I tell you to head to Shigure's place first and learn her long-range weapon evasion techniques? So what exactly did you and Shigure do up on that mountain all night? How come she had no idea you were going on a bounty hunt?!"
"Sensei, I'm sorry… I dragged you into this mess."
"It's not about dragging anyone. Didn't I warn you the opponent had a gun? You got lucky this time. If a bullet had actually punched through you, I wouldn't have the face to show up at Ryōzanpaku anymore. The consequences are no joke. No wonder all three women are so pissed. Seriously—when women get angry, it's terrifying. Even the Elder got pressured by their aura."
"Uh… They're mad for my sake. Honestly, it kinda touches me."
"…"
"For some reason, I've got this really bad feeling you're gonna get wrecked by women one day."
"Uh… I've got the same premonition. But hey, I'm not the type to fall easily for a pretty face, you know."
"I believe that one hundred percent… not."
"Please believe me, Sensei!! Oh—by the way, don't tell me a guy your age has never fallen for a woman before."
"I have. Back in university, there was this girl who was really skilled in martial arts. We liked each other for a while—got serious enough to talk about marriage. But then the proposal went wrong and we broke up."
"Hah? What kind of situation is that?!"
Takumi's gossip radar instantly went into overdrive. Sakaki grumbled, clearly still salty.
"We were sparring that day. I won and pinned her down so she couldn't move. The mood was perfect, so I took out the ring I'd prepared. But instead of saying yes, she got furious. Said I had to propose properly like a normal guy."
Before Takumi could even ask, Sakaki raised his voice.
"Why the hell should I kneel to propose?! That would completely humiliate my dignity! Even if I like her, I'm not gonna spoil a woman like that!"
Takumi stared at him speechlessly.
"Sensei… is your brain made entirely of muscle? You're seriously planning to stay single forever over something like that? I'm honestly impressed."
"What's wrong with it? Why do most guys kneel like spineless wimps when they propose? Is it some kind of deep-rooted subconscious thing?"
"That's because when a woman kneels, a man instinctively reaches for his belt."
Takumi said it with a grin. Sakaki blinked for a second… then got it. He burst out laughing.
"You little punk! On the outside you look like some girl-whipped idiot, but inside you're even more wicked than Kensei! Everyone's been fooled by you—hahahaha, I'm dying!"
"Hm? Kōichi, and Sakaki-sensei too. You two still have so much energy after hanging all night. Looks like you haven't reflected properly at all."
Fuurinji Miu walked over with her signature gentle smile. The second Takumi saw that familiar "gentle" expression, cold sweat poured down his back. Please don't tell me she heard that last part. Please.
"Oh, right. I think I just overheard you and Sakaki-sensei talking about something pretty interesting. Care to share with me?"
"Nope! Absolutely nothing!"
"Really? Oh well. Sakaki-sensei, you're free to go. Kōichi still needs some… thorough treatment for his broken parts."
The moment the words left her mouth, Sakaki flexed both arms—snap!—and the ropes instantly broke apart. He shot Takumi a deeply sympathetic look, then casually strolled away.
Takumi's heart shattered.
Sensei… why are you abandoning me?! I trusted you so much!
Miu pulled an archery target from the corner and placed it right against Takumi's chest. He asked in a tiny voice:
"Miu… what's this for?"
"Hm? Today Shigure is teaching Miu archery lessons. You're part of the training group too."
"Hah? So what's my job?"
"Human-shaped target. Don't worry—the arrows don't have heads."
"Wahhh… Can I refuse?"
"What do you think?"
A little while later, Shigure and Keni arrived as well. The three women of Ryōzanpaku were all gathered in one place—truly a case of three women making a full drama. Takumi felt exactly like the pitiful clown center stage.
"Keni, let's start with archery today. First, take a bow stance. The bow stance was invented specifically for drawing the bow. Put on this finger protector. Keep your arm level, aim at the center of the target, and release. We'll start from thirty paces."
"Yes, Shigure-sensei!"
Keni wore a crisp white training gi. Even though the past three days of training had made her cry buckets, her spirit and presence had clearly sharpened. Her pretty face now carried a bit more resolve. Unfortunately, since Takumi was hanging upside-down, he could only see their legs.
Whoosh—
An arrow streaked through the air and thwacked right into him—then dropped to the floor.
"Ow! Ow ow! Keni—you hit my arm!"
"Ah! Sorry, Senpai!"
"Ignore him. Keep going."
"Yes, Sensei."
Pain. Ahh. Danger.
That was Takumi's honest impression. Even without arrowheads, the sheer impact force from the bow still hurt like hell. What drove him nuts was that even at just thirty paces—barely twenty-something meters—Keni kept missing the target. Stomach, arm, even his head were bad enough… but then one arrow slipped right between his legs.
"GYAAAAAAAAAA!!"
Takumi screamed bloody murder and finally stopped playing good little target. He snapped the ropes apart, bolted for the window—and a fishing net immediately flew over him, wrapping him up tight. No matter how strong he was, he couldn't break free.
"Takumi, deserting training grounds is a no-no, you know~ Shigure said we have to discipline you properly so you don't go doing dangerous things again."
"Wahhh, Miu! That last one was the real danger! One tiny slip and our future would've been over! You can't just leave yourself a widow!"
His words made Miu's face flush bright red. She spat at him in embarrassment, then dragged him right back into the training area for phase two—tied to a giant spinning disk for a game of rotating knife-throwing.
"Aaaah no more… Somebody save meeee…!"
Takumi's miserable wails echoed through the dojo. He'd finally escaped one hellish training… only to tumble straight into an even scarier hell—the Asura Field of "love"!
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