Axel and Wade dropped out of the glowing portal, landing hard in a wasteland made of blood-red skulls.
Axel touched down smoothly, balanced and steady. Wade, on the other hand, crashed sideways into a mound of skulls.
"Oh, holy shit, my back…"
Wade dragged himself out and flipped Axel off.
"You didn't even try to catch me. I thought we had something special."
Axel let out a short laugh. "We're nothing alike. Can't have overlapping personalities, right? Besides, I'm clearly the cooler one, buddy."
He gestured toward the endless field of skulls.
In the distance, Logan was strapped to an X-shaped wooden stake, struggling helplessly.
Wade rubbed his face in frustration. "I really want to believe this guy has what it takes, but you saw it. He doesn't. Not even close."
"Then let's move on. Next Wolverine," Axel said, smiling.
He grabbed Wade's shoulder, and flames swallowed them both. They vanished, leaving Logan's cries echoing behind.
They reappeared moments later.
Wade raised his foot and gave Axel a thumbs up with his big toe. "Nice job. You left my foot behind in that last world."
He stomped once, forcing a newly grown foot back into his shoe.
"Don't worry, it grew back. Just like all those STDs I used to have. A real man doesn't fear injuries down there, right?"
Axel slapped him lightly, annoyed. "My teleportation has never failed. You did that on purpose. Who loses a foot and still manages to keep the shoe? If you had that much control, why not just pull your foot back?"
"Why would I? I didn't want you showing up in the next place yelling like a street vendor. But are you sure you've never messed up before? How many people have you taken across universes?"
"You're the first."
Wade froze, then cursed. "I knew it. Still, your ability is impressive. I won't admit I'm jealous. Actually, I am. I have to use machines to travel, and you just do it. You make women happy with your powers, while I rely on gadgets. Completely unfair."
He walked toward a bar ahead, clearly relieved to have landed somewhere normal.
Inside, mutants filled the place. No one paid much attention to their sudden arrival. Their conversation sounded like nonsense anyway.
At the counter sat a man with a familiar build. Logan.
Wade approached him from behind.
"Haha, my good buddy Logan. Your Wade daddy and Wraith…"
He paused and glanced at Axel. "That's the name, right?"
Axel nodded.
"Right. Your Wade daddy and Wraith daddy are here. You've got to come save the world with me. Without you, I'll never get Vanessa back."
"Shut up."
Logan slammed his bottle down and jumped off his stool.
Wade covered his mouth in mock admiration. "Nice landing. Very heroic. But was that really necessary from a stool…"
He stopped mid-sentence.
Axel burst out laughing.
In front of them stood a version of Logan with the same face, but barely over a meter tall.
"Don't laugh," Wade said. "We need to respect people like him."
He waved dismissively. "But you're not the one we're looking for. Look at you, short and faithful to the original look. Kid, go play somewhere else."
Before he could finish, claws shot upward from below, piercing straight through his body.
Blood dripped down the blades.
The small Logan sneered, yanked his claws free, and looked at Axel.
"He's definitely Wade, even if he's more annoying than I remember. But you… I don't recall knowing you."
He crouched slightly, claws extended again. "Are you here to cause trouble too?"
"No, no," Wade cut in quickly. "He's just tagging along."
Axel stepped forward instead.
In a flash, he grabbed the miniature Logan and lifted him effortlessly.
He examined him for a moment, then grinned at Wade. "Are you sure he's useless? This kind of character could still work. Pair him with Laura, maybe. Call it something dramatic."
Wade burst out laughing.
Logan snarled and drove his claws into Axel's side.
Clink.
The sound echoed.
The claws stopped cold against Axel's skin.
Logan stared, stunned.
Wade threw his hands up in delight. "Yes! This is exactly what I wanted. I needed to see Logan fail for once. Everyone has indestructible claws, so why should I suffer alone? This is perfect."
He opened another portal.
Axel tossed the small Logan aside and kicked Wade straight through it before stepping in after him.
They emerged in a new world.
Wade stumbled forward, heading toward another Logan who stood beside a pickup truck, repairing it.
This version was massive, broad-shouldered, wearing only jeans and a white tank top.
Wade nodded in approval. "This is the one. No doubt about it. Logan, buddy, my universe needs saving."
The man turned.
Wade froze.
Axel blinked in disbelief.
"Oh my god," Wade said. "Even here, he looks like that?"
"Don't start," Axel muttered. "Just call him Superman Wolverine and move on."
That was enough.
The man launched forward.
The ground cracked beneath his feet, and a shockwave rippled outward.
Axel raised his arms to block.
It didn't matter.
The punch hit like a meteor.
Axel was blasted through a building, then sent flying straight out of the atmosphere.
Wade followed shortly after, screaming as he shot into space.
"To hell with Superman Wolverine!"
He opened a portal mid-flight and vanished.
A moment later, Axel reappeared beside him in a burst of fire.
They landed together in another world.
Wade looked at him, irritated. "I thought you could at least fight him."
Axel shrugged. "I'm great at crushing weaker opponents. Against someone truly strong, I get crushed instead. Simple balance."
He smirked slightly. "But I'll get stronger. Even if this universe keeps throwing monsters at me, none of them will be able to finish me off. That's enough."
Wade let out a dry laugh. "That's comforting. Meanwhile, my world has about seventy-one hours left. Maybe less. And I'm losing my mind over it."
He ran a hand over his face. "If my world disappears, if I lose Vanessa, I don't know what I'll do. I'm not settling for anyone else. Not happening."
He pointed ahead.
Another Wolverine stood in the distance.
Wade squinted.
"Looks fine," he said.
Then paused.
"…Wait."
The figure wasn't a man.
It was an actual animal.
A honey badger.
____
Patreon = _Zeph
