The Morning Before Forever
Saturday, June 7, 2014 — 10:07 AM
Morning had already taken over Fort Greene by the time Jermaine woke up.
Sunlight pushed through the blinds, warm against the wall.
For a few seconds, he didn't move.
Then his eyes found the clock.
10:07.
"Damn."
Graduation.
Today.
Maine sat up and rubbed his face.
His phone was already full of notifications. Rome. Monique. Jada. Family. Group chats that had been quiet all week suddenly had something to say.
He ignored all of them.
For another minute, he just sat there.
Today was supposed to feel bigger.
Instead, it felt strangely normal.
He swung his feet onto the floor and looked toward the chair where his suit was waiting.
Navy.
Pressed.
Ready.
Beside it sat his cap and gown.
Monique had finished his cap exactly how she'd promised.
Nothing loud.
Nothing that screamed for attention.
Just little pieces of him worked into the design.
A basketball detail.
A subtle 32.
A small Naruto reference tucked into the artwork.
And a music nod that only somebody who knew him would recognize.
Maine smiled.
"That girl really knows me."
A knock came at the door.
"You decent?"
Nasir.
"Yeah."
The door opened.
His father stepped inside wearing his own suit, already dressed for the afternoon.
Nasir looked at the clock.
"You're just getting up?"
Maine shrugged.
"It's Saturday."
"It's graduation Saturday."
"Still Saturday."
Nasir laughed.
"You got about five hours before you walk across that stage."
"I'll be ready."
"I know."
Nasir looked at the suit.
Then back at Maine.
"You nervous?"
Maine thought about it.
"A little."
"Good."
"Good?"
"Means you care."
Maine nodded.
Nasir stepped closer and straightened the collar of Maine's shirt.
"You don't need to have your whole life figured out today."
Maine looked at him through the mirror.
"I know."
"Do you?"
Maine smiled.
"I'm working on it."
"That's all anybody can ask."
Nasir gave his shoulder a squeeze.
"I've gotta head out with Melo soon."
"The speech?"
"The speech."
Maine grinned.
"You better not embarrass me."
Nasir raised an eyebrow.
"Me?"
"Yes, you."
"You're the one graduating."
"Exactly."
Nasir laughed.
"Get dressed."
He started toward the door.
"Dad?"
Nasir turned.
"Thanks."
Nasir didn't ask what for.
He just nodded.
"Always."
The door closed behind him.
Maine stood there for another second.
Then he reached for his phone.
Downstairs, the house was already alive.
Mrs. Neal had somehow managed to turn the morning into another family event.
Breakfast covered the kitchen table.
Rome was there.
So were Tyler, Veronica, Aaron, and Jalissa, all moving through the room at different speeds.
Rome looked up when Maine entered.
"There he is."
Maine pulled out a chair.
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"You slept through half the day."
"It's ten."
"Exactly."
Maine laughed.
Mrs. Neal pointed a spatula toward him.
"Eat before you start acting like you don't have time."
"I wasn't gonna—"
"You were."
Rome nodded.
"She knows you too well."
Maine looked at him.
"Don't you have a suit to put on?"
"Later."
"You're still not dressed?"
Rome looked down at his clothes.
"I'm comfortable."
"Graduation is in five hours."
"Exactly. Plenty of time."
Mrs. Neal shook her head.
"You boys have absolutely no sense of urgency."
Rome reached for another pancake.
She slapped his hand away with the spatula.
"You've already had three."
"I need energy."
"For what?"
"Success."
Tyler laughed from across the table.
"Man, just eat."
Maine smiled.
For all the noise, all the jokes, all the people moving around him, there was something comforting about it.
The same house.
The same people.
The same kind of morning.
Except it wasn't the same.
Not really.
By tonight, everything would have a before and after.
Maine looked around the table.
He wanted to remember this part.
Not the ceremony.
Not the pictures.
Not the speeches.
This.
Rome stealing pancakes.
Mrs. Neal pretending she wasn't amused.
Aaron arguing with Jalissa over something neither of them would remember tomorrow.
Family being family.
The kind of morning you didn't realize you'd miss until it was gone.
By noon, the house had started emptying.
Nasir and Melo left first.
Nasir had one last thing to handle before the ceremony, and his speech still needed a final look.
Maine watched his father head toward the door.
"Good luck."
Nasir turned.
"Luck?"
"You know what I mean."
Nasir smiled.
"I'll see you there."
Melo walked past and pointed at Maine.
"Don't let him fool you. He's gonna be more nervous than you."
Nasir shook his head.
"Goodbye, Melo."
Melo laughed.
The door closed behind them.
Maine looked down at himself.
Still no suit.
Still no rush.
For a little while longer, he was just Maine.
Then Rome came downstairs in his suit.
Maine stared.
"You actually look decent."
Rome adjusted his jacket.
"I always look decent."
"You look uncomfortable."
"That's because I'm dressed like somebody's accountant."
Maine laughed.
Mrs. Neal came over and fixed Rome's collar.
"Stop moving."
"Ma."
"Stop."
Rome sighed.
"Yes, ma'am."
Maine watched them.
Something about the sight made his chest tighten.
Not sadness.
Not exactly.
Just awareness.
This was one of those moments that would become a memory before he even realized it.
He picked up his cap.
The little 32 caught the light.
Maine smiled.
Then he put it back down.
There was still time.
A few more hours before the stage.
A few more hours before the pictures.
A few more hours before somebody said congratulations and meant it as more than a word.
Maine looked toward the window.
Brooklyn was bright outside.
People were already making their way toward Barclays.
Soon, he'd be one of them.
He wasn't sure what came after today.
College.
Summer.
Basketball.
Work.
Whatever life decided to throw at him.
For once, he didn't need the answer.
He just needed to show up.
Maine picked up his suit jacket.
And finally, the morning was over.