Even stood stunned for a moment after hearing the crazy cowboy's words. A small flicker of pride tried to rise within him—at least someone was calling him a 'Hero'! But as the true meaning sank in, that pride collapsed like a house of cards. The man wasn't calling him a hero; he was saying Even had taken the 'posture' of a hero—meaning, he was just acting.
In typical web novels, this scene happens all the time. When the main character waves his fingers in the air at a hallucination, the world thinks he's crazy. But in the end, he's the one who defeats a Demon King and becomes the world's savior. Then, people build statues to worship him.
Even whispered to himself, 'Worship? No, that's a bit too weird.'
If only Even's luck were a little better! If only he had a system that gave him superpowers instead of a grumpy, insulting one. If only his massive, sagging belly had turned lean the moment he stepped into this world!
Sometimes, he even dreamed of building a 'harem.' But looking at his own layers of fat, those colorful hopes vanished into the wind. 'The idea of sharing a bed with two or three MILFs wouldn't be bad. Most people who go to other worlds bring good luck with them. Why is my fate so cursed?'
Even slapped himself hard for these stray thoughts. 'Now isn't the time for fantasies; it's time to focus. I can think of nonsense later. First, I need to get my hands on that laptop so I can watch some videos and calm my nerves.'
Even hadn't even finished observing the System, but it was already desperate to leave. Right then, the familiar, harsh message flashed on the screen:
[What a fat freak! Are you done looking?]
Even hesitated. Since he couldn't touch the System with his fingers, how could he control it?
He thought to himself—'Disappear.'
In an instant, the blue light vanished. Surprisingly, the System didn't hurl a parting insult this time. Even smiled. Finally, a moment where the System didn't humiliate him. He realized he didn't need to use his hands; he had to control this junk with his thoughts.
But his smile didn't last long. Just as he felt a spark of joy, the System flickered back for a single second, spat out a sharp curse, and vanished again.
"Ugh!!" Even clutched his forehead in frustration. This System was impossible to deal with!
Anyway, focusing on the man beside him was more urgent than the rotten System. Even looked directly into the cowboy's eyes and asked, "What are you trying to say? What 'Great Hero'?"
"Don't act like you don't know! Your behavior makes it seem like you aren't even from this world," the cowboy said, pulling one leg in and resting his right arm on his knee—the posture of an experienced warrior. Staring intensely, he added, "You're a good actor. But you still haven't said—were you really speaking the language of the Orcs?"
Everything the man said went over Even's small brain. He laughed internally, 'Yes, I really am not from this world.' But he said nothing, maintaining a stony silence.
The cowboy grew restless at the silence. "What's wrong? Why aren't you talking? You sit there in the Hero's posture, yet you don't know him? The Great Hero who saved our world from the Demon King! The one who killed the Demon King with his own hands!"
Even was shell-shocked. He couldn't believe his ears. 'What did this crazy guy just say? The Demon King is dead? Then what am I doing here? My final purpose is gone!'
It was true he had fled his own world to come here. His old world was worse than hell, and this fantasy world was much better. But if there was no Demon King, where was the meaning in Even's existence?
He asked in disbelief, "Are you telling the truth?"
"What is there to lie about!? Every child in this world knows! Before bed, parents tell their children two stories," the man said, holding up his fist. He raised one finger. "The first is the horror of the Demon King, so kids curl up in fear and go to sleep early." He raised a second finger. "And the second is the story of the Great Hero, whom children grow up idolizing."
The man glared at Even with rage. "And you are mimicking the Hero's posture! To act like a dead legend is nothing but mockery. Are you insulting him while sitting in this filthy hole? There are many plays about his bravery, and actors play his role with great respect. But they know they are actors. You act like you are the Great Hero! And then you act surprised when you hear about him! It's deeply insulting."
Suddenly, the crazy cowboy whipped a revolver from his holster with lightning speed. An old-fashioned, single-barrel revolver, with Even's name seemingly written on the bullet inside. The man aimed the barrel directly at Even's forehead and growled in a cold voice, "All this proves you're actually a monster! Someone who speaks the tongue of beasts and insults our Hero—what else could you be? I'll finish you off before the Orcs even make us into dinner!"
He placed his finger on the trigger and smiled poisonously. Then, with his thumb, he clicked the hammer back and spun the cylinder. That metallic 'click' meant Even's death was now just a matter of time. The man threatened, "I won't even ask for your last wish! You ugly bastard!!"
Even's body froze like stone from the fear of death. He tried to scramble backward, but his back hit the muddy wall of the pit. What kind of world was this?
Every step here was a death trap. First, that cursed System threw him into the ocean. Then the Orcs captured him to boil him alive. And now, the man he dismissed as a 'frightened chicken' was holding a gun to his head like the Grim Reaper!
Even wailed internally, 'Why couldn't I be lucky like those eight or ten typical Isekai protagonists? Why didn't I get a beautiful mage or a loyal system?'
Even finally understood why this man was cursing so boldly in front of the Orcs. The man knew the beasts didn't understand human speech, so he was just venting his rage. But seeing Even's smooth conversation with the Orcs had poisoned the man's mind with suspicion. It was a natural doubt—and now Even might have to pay for it with his life.
With death pressed against his forehead, the blue light of the System flickered again. Even carefully tilted his head so the crazy cowboy wouldn't notice.
He looked desperately at the floating window.
'Now! Now is the time! It will give me strength! It will give me superpowers! Some God-tier ability to make me the strongest in this world with a snap of my fingers! I can at least save my own life… FUCKKK!!!'—in his fear and excitement, he cursed the System in his head.
But the System's response was cruel and mocking as always:
_________________________________________________________
[You fat pig! Do you know why I don't help you? Because I am deeply disappointed to have such a bloated human. The Hero that man is talking about was my previous Master. And my second owner... I don't even want to talk about you. If you die now, I might have to wait a long time for a new Master. But that wait would be better than serving a pig like you. With your death, a new door opens for me. I can at least hope the next one won't be addicted to obscene videos!]
Every word of the System pierced Even like an arrow. But it didn't stop; the text changed rapidly:
[Always laptop, laptop, and laptop! You don't want to better yourself, yet you expect help from me? And even if I were merciful enough to give you power or a skill, do you know what would happen?]
'What would happen? Tell me!'—Even screamed in his mind.
[This is what—you might survive this, but moments later, your unfit body would explode like a bomb. Your fat-filled body cannot handle the pressure of the power I give. Actually, that would have been good for me; I could find a new Master sooner.]
The System paused, then began to Say again:
[But the problem is, I don't want to wait in that darkness anymore. My previous Master was great, but he hid that 'Mirror' in a place that is almost impossible to find. Maybe many years later, someone will find that mirror and come to this world, and then I can serve them. Until then, I would have to spend time in a deep darkness worse than hell. So, even though I want to kill you, I don't have the courage. What if no one ever finds the mirror? What if it's destroyed? Then I'll rot in that darkness forever!]
_________________________________________________________
Instead of anger, Even's jaw dropped in shock. In the middle of the System's insults and nonsense, he had found a piece of diamond.
The Mirror!
The mysterious mirror he used to come to this strange world. A thousand-watt bulb went off in his head.
He had found the perfect way to save his skull. At that exact moment, the cowboy's finger tightened on the trigger. The fatal sound was waiting to tear through the silence.
But Even didn't move an inch. Instead, with immense contempt, he echoed that sound deep within his own soul—
'Dishoom!!'