Miles narrowed his eyes. His gaze pierced the cold screen, locking onto the Yamper in the female viewer's arms. He stared it down like a human X-ray as the dog panted wildly, pretending to be cute.
On the surface, this Electric-type canine looked like a sunny, cheerful good boy. It wagged its short, lightning-bolt-shaped tail vigorously, doing its best to look harmless and affectionate.
However, anyone with a basic grasp of animal psychology—or a top-tier appraiser with keen observation skills like Miles—could instantly see right through its clumsy disguise.
The little creature didn't dare to meet Miles's eyes through the camera. Not even for a second.
Its large, jewel-like green eyes darted around guiltily. Its bright yellow ears, which should have been standing tall, were pinned back flat. Even its two short front legs shrank back against its owner's chest, as if desperately trying to hide a guilty conscience.
How could a Pokémon with the intelligence of a toddler display such a human-like, guilty expression?
[Viewer "Late Night No Drinking": Bro, is there really such a thing as a pervy dog that loves beautiful women? Did it forget to drink memory-wiping water before reincarnating? Was it a lonely pervert in its past life who's now taking advantage of being a dog?]
[Viewer "Wild Pokémon Behavior Expert": Looking at this from a biological standpoint, there's reproductive and aesthetic isolation between species. A Yamper should only be attracted to female Boltund or Pokémon in its Egg Group. Being interested in human legs completely violates natural science!]
[Viewer "Canyon's Most Affectionate Jungler": LMAO! Bros, I don't know why, but I'm suddenly a little jealous of this dog! I wanna be a cute Yamper too, getting hugged and head-patted by pretty girls in revealing clothes every day. God-tier life!]
[Viewer "Outlaw John Doe": Wait, Ms. Static, check it carefully! Could this dog be specially trained to grope people? There are criminals out there who train small pets to harass women!]
[Viewer "Broke Corporate Slave": I'm dead. This stream rewrites my worldview every day! First, a Poochyena starved itself to skin and bones over food aggression, and now a Yamper is a street thug teasing decent women! Master Miles, can you take this case?]
[Viewer "Fashion's Ultimate Exposer": That shifty look in its eyes doesn't belong to an honest dog. Master, hurry up and tell this sister if her dog has a brain disease or a hormone issue!]
[Viewer "Veteran Breeder Old Wang": I've lived half my life and never heard of such a bizarre illness. But looking at Master Miles's confident smirk, bro has probably already figured it out, right?]
Faced with the chat's wild speculations, Miles calmly adjusted his posture. He leaned forward slightly, resting his chin on his crossed hands, and gave the female viewer on the screen a knowing smile.
"Ms. Static, don't get worked up just yet," Miles said smoothly. "Right now, reach out and run your hand down this Yamper's back. Follow its spine and see if there's a hidden zipper anywhere."
He paused, letting the words sink in.
"Or, think carefully. Has this little guy been to any haunted or desolate wilderness areas recently? Could it have been forcibly possessed by a wandering Ghost-type Pokémon?"
His teasing, supernatural-laced words instantly drained the color from the female viewer's face.
"Ah?! A zipper? Possessed by a ghost?!" she gasped, her voice trembling.
Having watched Miles's hardcore stream earlier—the one about the water ghost's dead face and the Jynx snow mountain legend—her psychological defenses were already crumbling. She was jumping at shadows.
Forgetting all about her image on camera, she frantically flipped the Yamper upside down. Her hands desperately dug through the dog's soft, tan fur.
"There... there's no zipper! Master, please don't scare me!" she cried, her voice thick with tears. "I've been terrified of ghosts since I was little! If it's really possessed by some pervert ghost, I won't even dare to sleep tonight!"
Just then, a highly impatient, arrogant young man's voice rang out from off-camera.
"Ugh, enough! What are you blindly messing around with? Hurry up and turn off that broken phone!" the man snapped.
"It's late, and instead of sleeping, you're watching this bullshit appraisal stream! What the hell does a no-name streamer with barely a thousand followers know about Pokémon medicine? He's just fooling short-sighted, stupid women like you, and you actually listen to him?"
The sudden male voice was aggressive, dripping with undisguised hostility toward Miles. More importantly, it carried a panicked urgency. He wanted to force the stream to end.
"Who is that? Who's talking next to you?" Miles's gaze turned icy.
He didn't go looking for trouble, but he certainly didn't fear it. Some guy hiding off-camera didn't even have the guts to show his face, yet dared to openly mock him in his own stream?
"Oh, Master Miles, please don't mind him. That's my boyfriend..." The female viewer turned her head, glaring fiercely off-camera.
"You shut up!" she shouted. "What do you know? You haven't even watched Master Miles's stream, so what gives you the right to point fingers? If it wasn't for the Master last time, the boss of the Transit would have been completely screwed!"
"If you don't understand, go play somewhere else. Don't interrupt me while I'm getting the dog checked!"
Scolded mercilessly by his girlfriend, the man clearly felt he'd lost face.
"Suit yourself," he muttered resentfully. "Don't come crying to me when you get scammed."
After that, he went completely silent.
However, this seemingly ordinary lovers' quarrel struck Miles like a flash of lightning. Instantly, the final, most fatal puzzle piece fell right into place.
'This man's reaction is way too abnormal', Miles sneered inwardly.
If they were a normal couple, a boyfriend watching his girlfriend anxiously seek help for a pet would, at worst, just watch from the sidelines.
Even if he thought the streamer was a fraud, he wouldn't show such intense, desperate rejection. He certainly wouldn't rush to cut off the livestream.
This behavior wasn't just disbelief. It was panic.
The panic of someone terrified that a massive scandal was about to be exposed!
'Interesting. It seems this dog's "lust" isn't a medical issue at all. It's a man-made drama', Miles concluded.
Taking a deep breath, Miles dropped his joking demeanor. His eyes locked onto the increasingly anxious Yamper like a hawk.
"Sister, I was just joking earlier to lighten the mood," Miles stated plainly, smoothly pivoting the conversation. "Your Yamper is perfectly healthy. There are no signs of possession, and there's no one wearing a dog suit."
He narrowed his eyes, asking a critical question. "I heard your boyfriend's tone just now. He must interact with this Yamper a lot, right? Let me ask you a specific detail... is this dog normally close to him?"
"Yes! Very close!" Ms. Static nodded without hesitation. "Even though I bought the dog, I'm usually busy with work. Most of the time, my boyfriend takes it downstairs to the park for walks. Every time this little guy sees my boyfriend, its tail wags faster than a propeller!"
She paused, looking confused. "But that's exactly what's so weird. Aside from my boyfriend, it completely ignores any other adult male. It only has a soft spot for nicely dressed, pretty ladies!"
"Good, good, good!"
Hearing this definitive answer, Miles couldn't help himself repeating his words.
A confident, oppressive smirk crept onto his lips—the kind of smile a master detective wore when they finally saw through the entire truth.
The clues had formed a perfect loop.
But to get irrefutable proof, Miles needed to use his ultimate, dimension-shattering system skill.
'System, deduct my influence points! Activate 'Voice of All Things'...' Miles commanded in his mind.
Instantly, the noisy background chatter of the livestream faded away. An invisible mental wave shot through the internet connection, locking directly onto the depths of the sweating Yamper's brain.
A second later, an inner monologue filled with panic, anxiety, and heavy canine panting exploded in Miles's mind.
'Woof! It's over, it's over, it's over! That human on the screen has terrifying eyes, woof! It feels like he can see right through my belly! Awooo... Male owner, you big idiot, why did you have to open your mouth?! The more you talk back, the more he suspects us, woof!'
'We're dead meat now, woof! All the shameless things we did behind Mama's back are about to be spilled by this scary man! That is a fatal secret! Mama must never know, woof! If Mama finds out, my premium meat cans will be gone forever, and the male owner will probably get beaten to death with a slipper, woof! No, I need to fake a stomachache and bounce immediately, woof!'
Listening to the Yamper's panicked, rapid-fire thoughts, Miles almost burst out laughing.
Good lord. Not only did this dog have high intelligence, but it could actually deduce consequences using human logic—it even understood the tactical retreat of "bouncing"!
This wasn't a normal pet dog. This was a perfect partner in crime wearing a dog suit!
More importantly, Miles had completely confirmed his absurd theory. This was absolutely a despicable case of infidelity. A scumbag was using a cute pet as a cover-up for his playboy behavior!
Deactivating 'Voice of All Things', Miles stopped burning his influence points. He sat back in his chair, staring at the Yamper just as it prepared to fake a seizure and escape the female viewer's arms.
The light of justice gleamed in his eyes.
[Viewer "Frontline Melon Eater": Holy crap! Master Miles's expression just changed! Bro is about to drop his ultimate move! Every time he smiles like that, someone is definitely about to get wrecked!]
[Viewer "Market Insider": Saying 'good' three times in a row—his aura is maxed out! I have a strong feeling this isn't a Pokémon disease appraisal at all. This is a scene of catching a cheater red-handed!]
[Viewer "Keyboard Holmes": Everyone, look at the Yamper's movements! It was acting cute a moment ago, and now its whole body is stiff. It even looks like it wants to jump off-screen and run away! This dog has definitely become sentient, it knows disaster is imminent!]
[Viewer "Rational Analyst": I've found the blind spot! The boyfriend frequently walks the dog alone + the dog only likes pretty young girls + the boyfriend is extremely hostile to the streamer... String these clues together, and the answer is obvious!]
[Viewer "Midnight Heartbreak Club": My god! Could it be... this dog was trained to be a wingman?! That boyfriend is way too scheming!]
[Viewer "Crazy Brother Motorcycle": Thrilling! Too thrilling! I thought this was a science show, but it turned into a family revenge drama! Master Miles, hurry up and slap the truth onto that scumbag's face!]
[Viewer "Frontline Melon Eater": Front row seats! Got my popcorn ready to watch Master Miles cook this scumbag!]
"Ms. Static," Miles called out.
He watched the bewildered female viewer struggle to hold the fleeing Yamper. His voice carried a hint of pity, but mostly, it held a cold determination to expose the truth.
"The reality of this situation is far more bizarre than you imagine. And it's not this Yamper's fault at all. The one at fault is the person who takes it out for 'walks' every single day!"
"What do you mean? Master Miles, you're confusing me. What does this have to do with my boyfriend?" she asked.
Her face was full of astonishment; she completely failed to connect her dog's weird quirk to her seemingly honest partner.
"Heh, sister, how can you be so naive? Do I really have to spell it out for you?" Miles sneered.
Like a cold, calculating surgeon, he began to dissect the meticulously planned scam. "Have you ever heard of the famous 'Pavlov's Dog' conditioned reflex experiment?"
"The reason your Yamper barks and pounces whenever it sees a pretty young girl isn't because it's a pervert. It's because over a very long period of being 'walked,' it has formed an unbreakable conditioned reflex!"
Miles's voice suddenly pitched up, every word striking like a dagger.
"That boyfriend of yours—the one hiding off-camera, too scared to make a sound—uses the excuse of walking your dog to go to parks and busy streets."
"He specifically targets pretty women to hit on them! He uses your Yamper's incredibly cute appearance to win over these girls and lower their defenses!"
"During these pick-up attempts, he either secretly slips the dog treats to make it play along, or the girls find the dog so cute that they pull snacks out of their own bags to feed it!"
"Day after day, countless reinforcements! In this Yamper's incredibly simple brain, a crude equation was established long ago...
[Young, beautiful girls = Endless delicious treats = Praise from owner]!"
"As for men, since they don't give it treats, of course it ignores them!"
"Sister, do you understand now? Your dog isn't a pervert. It's a ruthless begging machine being used by your boyfriend as a top-tier wingman to cast a wide net and pick up girls!"
Boom!
Miles's flawless, tightly reasoned deduction unraveled the mystery like peeling silk. It dropped into the livestream like a nuclear bomb, triggering an unprecedented explosion in the chat!
[Viewer "Outlaw John Doe": Holy shit! Holy shit! Holy shit! A fatal strike! This is literally possession by a master detective! He reverse-engineered a scumbag's vile playboy behavior through a dog's conditioned reflex! This logic is absolutely flawless!]
[Viewer "Late Night Explorer": That's so disgusting! Whenever I see a guy walking a cute dog on the street, I usually can't resist going over to pet it, and sometimes I even give them my ID. Turns out it's all full of calculation! This scumbag actually used psychology in such a despicable way!
[Viewer "Canyon's Most Affectionate Jungler": I took notes! I can't believe I'm actually learning top-tier pick-up tactics in a Pokémon appraisal stream!]
Update:
The author has gone on an indefinite hiatus, so uploads will be paused for now.
I'll keep an eye out for any news.
Ngl, I got kinda hooked on this one too. 😔