Chapter 23: Cause and Effect
EL'S APARTMENT - 6:02 AM - THURSDAY
BEEEEEP-BEEEEEP-BEEEEEP
El's eyes snapped open.
He reached for his phone.
THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 15 - 6:02 AM
Thursday.
One day.
One day until Friday.
One day until the playground.
One day until the dirt.
He lay there, heart pounding, staring at the ceiling.
Last night I told Demi everything.
Again.
Third time.
He believed me.
Again.
How many more times?
He looked at the nightstand.
The cracker was brighter now - glowing steadily, warmly, like a small sun waiting to be held.
The card sat beside it.
Sweet dreams, El.
The symbol.
The entrance is where you first found me.
Remember the flowers.
All still there.
He reached for the cracker.
It was hot - almost too hot - but he held on.
You'll need sustenance.
For what?
He didn't know.
Not yet.
But he was getting closer.
He could feel it.
---
LANDSBURGE CENTRAL TRAIN STATION - 7:48 AM
The train station was its usual chaos.
El found his spot near the doors, thermos in hand, mind elsewhere.
His phone buzzed.
DEMI: GOOD MORNING THURSDAY! ONE DAY UNTIL FRIDAY! ONE DAY UNTIL WE BECOME LEGENDS! OR CORPSES! DEPENDS ON HOW TOMORROW GOES!
DEMI: TOO SOON FOR CORPSE JOKES?
DEMI: I'M GOING WITH TOO SOON. SORRY.
DEMI : BUT ALSO NOT SORRY BECAUSE THAT'S WHO I AM.
El almost smiled.
Then a notification popped up on his screen.
A news alert.
Old archives.
Something about-
He froze.
December 9, 2030.
12/09/30.
His heart stopped.
He clicked it.
An old news article.
Something about a city event.
Irrelevant.
Random.
But the date.
Why now? Why did it appear now?
He stared at the screen until the train doors closed.
---
TATE ASSOCIATION - 8:47 AM
The elevator doors opened.
Demi was there.
Chips in hand.
Grinning.
"You're late."
El stepped out. "I'm exactly on time."
"Exactly on time is late in Demi Standards."
Demi fell into step beside him, crunching loudly.
"Big day today. The last day before THE day. You ready?"
"No."
"Good answer. Honesty is important in a partnership."
They walked toward the cubicles.
The office hummed around them - keyboards, phones, the usual symphony.
Demi lowered his voice.
"Hey. About last night. The loop thing. Kaye. The playground."
El tensed. Here it comes. The doubt.
"I believe you." Demi said it simply.
Firmly. "I know I said it last night, but I'm saying it again. I believe you. All of it."
El looked at him.
Demi shrugged.
"You're not crazy. You're El. You're boring and emotionally constipated, but you're not crazy. So if you say you're trapped in a loop and your dream girlfriend is real and fading, then that's what's happening."
El's chest warmed. "Thank you."
"Don't thank me yet. Thank me after we survive tomorrow." Demi grinned.
"Now come on. We've got a whole day to pretend to work before our lives change forever."
---
CONFERENCE ROOM - 9:15 AM
Mira stood at the front, tablet in hand, going over Friday deadlines.
"Tomorrow is the Q3 deadline. All projections finalized by 4 PM. No exceptions."
Demi leaned to El.
"No exceptions. She's so dramatic. I love her."
El didn't respond.
His eyes were on Nev.
Nev sat near the window, same as always.
Sharp features.
Dark eyes.
Completely still.
But today, he was watching El.
Not glancing.
Not observing.
Watching.
Their eyes met.
Nev nodded once.
Just slightly.
Just enough.
Then looked away.
El's hand tightened around his coffee.
He knows something.
---
EL'S CUBICLE - 10:15 AM
El pulled out the cracker.
It was hot.
Almost pulsing.
He held it in his palm, watching the glow.
You'll need sustenance.
What kind of sustenance?
Food?
Memory?
Courage?
He thought about Kaye.
Fading.
Waiting.
He thought about the garden.
Dying.
He thought about Aletheia's words.
Time is weird here.
Effect can come before cause.
He thought about the date.
12/09/30.
He thought about the card.
Messages appearing before he dreamed them.
He thought about Kaye knowing Demi.
Knowing about his almost smiles.
Knowing things she couldn't possibly know.
What if-
His breath caught.
What if the dreams aren't the future?
What if they're the past?
---
EL'S CUBICLE - 11:30 AM
Demi appeared, vaulting over the wall.
"You're doing the thinking face again. The scary thinking face. Spit it out."
El looked at him.
"Demi. The cracker. It's been glowing since the old woman gave it to me."
"Magic snack. We established this."
"What if it's not a snack?"
Demi blinked. "Then what is it?"
"I don't know. But I think... I think I have to use it at the playground. At the dirt."
"Okay. So tomorrow. We go. We bring magic cracker. We figure it out."
El nodded.
But something still nagged at him.
Demi noticed.
"What? What else?"
El hesitated.
"Demi. There's something I never told you. About the dreams."
Demi leaned in.
"What?"
"Kaye knows you."
Demi froze.
"What do you mean she knows me? We've never met."
"I know. But in the dream... she mentioned you. Specifically."
Demi's voice dropped.
"What did she say?"
El almost smiled.
"She said... Demi talks about my almost-smiles constantly. She said you call it 'a religious experience.'"
Demi stared at him.
Mouth open.
"I've never told anyone that," Demi whispered.
"The religious experience thing. That's... that's just something I think. I've never said it out loud."
"I know."
"Then how does she-"
"Time is weird in the dream, Demi. Effect can come before cause. Maybe in the dream... you've already met her. Maybe you've already told her everything."
Demi was quiet for a long moment.
"So you're telling me... I have a friendship with your dream girlfriend that I don't remember?"
"Something like that."
Demi ran his hands through his hair.
"That's the weirdest thing I've ever heard. And I've heard YOU talk about time loops."
El's eyebrow twitched.
"Welcome to my life."
Demi shook his head.
"Okay. Okay. So past, future, dreams, reality - it's all mixed up. Like scrambled eggs. But existential."
"Yes."
"And Kaye is stuck in the middle of it."
"Yes."
"And tomorrow, we go to the playground and figure it out."
"Yes."
Demi took a deep breath.
Then grinned.
"Okay. Cool. Cool cool cool. No pressure. Just saving your maybe-girlfriend from existential oblivion. Normal Thursday conversation."
El almost smiled.
---
EL'S CUBICLE - 2:15 PM
Nev appeared.
Not at the entrance this time.
Inside the cubicle.
Standing there like he'd always been there.
Demi jumped.
"WHAT THE-how did you-when did you-"
Nev ignored him.
Looked at El.
"You're closer than you think."
El held his gaze.
"Closer to what?"
"The truth. About the loops. About the girl. About why time keeps breaking."
El's heart pounded.
"How do you know about that?"
Nev's lips curved - just slightly.
"Because I've seen it before."
Demi interrupted.
"SEEN WHAT BEFORE. SEEN WHO BEFORE. ARE YOU IN THE LOOP TOO. EXPLAIN."
Nev glanced at him.
"Not in the way you think."
Then back to El.
"The cracker. You still have it."
It wasn't a question.
El nodded slowly.
"Good. You'll need it tomorrow. At the dirt."
"How do you know about the dirt?"
Nev didn't answer.
Just looked at El with those dark, unreadable eyes.
"Effect can come before cause," he said quietly.
"You're starting to understand. Keep going."
He walked away.
"WHAT DOES THAT MEAN. KEEP GOING WHERE. I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS."
El didn't respond.
He was too busy thinking.
He knows about the cracker.
He knows about the dirt.
He knows about time breaking.
Who is he?
---
EL'S CUBICLE - 3:30 PM
El sat alone.
Demi had gone to harass Janet from Accounting about something.
He stared at the cracker in his palm.
Effect can come before cause.
The card messages appeared before I dreamed them.
Kaye knew Demi before I ever mentioned him.
12/09/30 appeared long ago - but it's years away.
What if-
His breath caught.
What if the dreams aren't the future?
What if they're the past?
What if Kaye isn't fading - she's already gone?
What if I'm not trying to save her - I'm trying to remember her?
His hands shook.
That's why the garden is dying.
That's why she's fading.
Because I'm forgetting.
Because I've already forgotten.
The cracker isn't for eating.
It's for remembering.
He looked at it.
Glowing.
Warm.
Alive.
Tomorrow.
The playground.
The dirt.
I'll remember.
I have to.
---
EL'S CUBICLE - 4:45 PM
Demi appeared.
"You ready to go? Or are you going to stare at that cracker until it turns into a croissant?"
El stood.
Grabbed his bag.
They walked to the elevator together.
"So. Tomorrow. The playground. The dirt. The magic cracker. We're really doing this."
"Yes."
"And Kaye is real."
"Yes."
"And she's waiting for you."
El's chest tightened. "I hope so."
Demi bumped his shoulder.
"She is. She's been waiting this whole time. Tomorrow, you find her."
The elevator doors opened.
They stepped out into the lobby.
"Same time tomorrow?" Demi asked.
"Same time."
Demi grinned.
"Then let's go home and pretend to sleep."
They parted ways at the corner.
---
EL'S APARTMENT - 10:15 PM
El sat at the kitchen table.
Cracker in hand.
Card before him.
Coffee beside him.
He thought about everything.
Kaye knows Demi. Knows about his almost smiles.
Knows things she couldn't possibly know.
Because in the dream - where time is weird - they've already met.
Effect can come before cause.
The card messages appeared before I dreamed them.
12/09/30 is years away - but it appeared long ago.
Because it's not a future date.
It's a past one.
A marker.
A reminder.
Of her.
He looked at the cracker.
Tomorrow.
The playground.
The dirt.
I'll remember.
I have to.
---
DARK CONFERENCE ROOM - SAME TIME
A long table.
Polished dark wood.
High-backed chairs.
Aletheia sat at the head, fingers steepled.
Her glasses caught the dim light, hiding her eyes.
Beside her, Vesper leaned back, expression unreadable, trailing the faint scent of expensive clove cigarettes.
She looked bored, but her eyes missed nothing.
Across from them, Lyra stared at her tablet, data scrolling endlessly.
For once, she looked up.
At the far end, Sloane sat with arms crossed, gaze cold, watching the door.
Aletheia spoke.
"He's starting to understand."
Vesper uncrossed her legs, leaning forward slightly.
"About time."
"The garden has forty-eight hours. Maybe less."
"And if he doesn't remember in time?"
Aletheia's smile returned.
Sad.
Knowing.
"Then she's gone. And so is he."
Silence.
Tink.
From the corner.
Caelum.
Spoon against saucer.
Grinning.
"Forty-eight hours," she echoed.
"Tick tock."
She sipped her espresso. Made a face.
"Still bitter."
Tink.