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Chapter 61 - Chapter 61: Cutting Off Uncle’s Head (3/5)

Watching Kanao Tsuyuri walk away, Nezuko Kamado stood where she was, completely unable to understand.

At the same time, Kanao couldn't understand where Nezuko's sadness came from either.

The sorrow of one person could never truly be shared by another.

With a basket filled to the brim with flowers hanging from her arm, Kanao soon arrived at the cave entrance.

Standing in the warm sunlight, she looked toward the interior of the cave—where the sunlight couldn't reach.

Inside was pure darkness.

Even with Kanao's unusually sharp eyesight, she could only barely make out a vague silhouette illuminated by the flickering firelight.

A figure standing quietly in the shadows.

And those… crimson eyes.

To most people, such a sight would have been terrifying.

But to Kanao, it felt warm.

"Uncle!"

The girl hurried into the cave, basket in hand. Coming from the sunlight into the darkness, her eyes took a moment to adjust.

She closed them briefly, then opened them again, allowing them to adapt to the dim cave.

Soma smiled and rubbed Kanao's head. He brushed the dust from her clothes, then noticed something else.

Her pants were completely damp.

The morning dew had been heavy, and her small shoes were now caked with mud.

He also noticed the beads of sweat at her temples.

Seeing all this, Soma said nothing, but his crimson eyes softened.

"Uncle, look and see if any of these are the flowers you're looking for."

Kanao held up the basket full of flowers, her eyes shining with anticipation.

"Alright."

Soma took the basket and led her over to the campfire. He first handed her a cup of hot water before beginning to examine the flowers.

The girl cupped the warm drink in both hands.

Her pink-violet eyes remained fixed on her uncle as he inspected the flowers, filled with expectation.

Soma began tasting them one by one.

Flowers he had already tried before.

Flowers he had never tasted.

One after another.

But none of them caused even the slightest change in his body.

Slowly, disappointment began to creep into his heart.

The negative emotions he had been suppressing for so long began rising uncontrollably, making him feel increasingly irritable.

It's not the Spider Lily...

Not this one either...

Why are there so many flowers, but not a single Blue Spider Lily?

Wasn't the Blue Spider Lily supposed to grow on the mountain behind Tanjiro Kamado's home? Then why isn't it here?

His frustration kept building.

He knew it wasn't Kanao's fault.

But he couldn't stop the thought from surfacing—why couldn't they find it?

The cravings he had been suppressing—the urge to devour flesh, the emotions he had been holding down—suddenly surged upward all at once.

For a moment, he nearly stood up.

He felt an overwhelming urge to destroy everything in front of him.

"Uncle…"

A soft, childish voice suddenly sounded beside him.

The violent restlessness in Soma's heart instantly calmed, as if someone had poured cool water over raging flames.

He turned his head.

By the campfire, the girl sat holding her cup, looking up at him with her small head tilted.

Her bright eyes were fixed on him. Full of hope.

Hope that among the flowers she had gathered, there might be the Blue Spider Lily he was searching for.

At that moment, Soma realized something.

He didn't want to disappoint those eyes.

He didn't want to shatter that hope.

In fact…

Protecting that look in her eyes suddenly felt more important than even finding the Blue Spider Lily.

He lowered his head and forced his surging emotions back down.

Returning to sit beside the fire, he found himself unable to look directly at her bright, expectant gaze.

"Uncle… did you find the Blue Spider Lily?"

Kanao tilted her head, confused by how quickly her uncle's mood had changed.

"No," he said, his voice heavy.

"Don't worry, Uncle."

Before Soma could say anything to comfort her, Kanao reached out with her small hand and gently grabbed his.

"I'll keep looking for you. I'll definitely find the flower Uncle needs."

Her small fingers tightened around his hand.

I promise you, Kanao will find it for you."

Her voice was incredibly firm.

"…Alright." Soma didn't look at her.

He simply stared at the campfire burning in front of him.

Although Kanao's words had calmed his heart, the restless darkness inside him was still there… lurking quietly beneath the surface.

The faint unease still lingered deep within his heart.

If…

If he truly failed to find the Blue Spider Lily, then sooner or later he would end up like every other demon—eventually sinking into the endless hunger that defined their kind.

At best, he might become something like Akaza or Rui—demons who still clung to fragments of the emotions they once had as humans.

At worst…

He would forget everything. Completely.

He would become nothing more than a monster that craved flesh and blood, a creature with no memory of ever being human. Perhaps only in the final moment—when a Nichirin Sword cut through his neck—would those lost memories return.

Soma quietly added another piece of firewood to the campfire. The rising flames reflected in his crimson eyes.

A long, long silence passed.

He finally turned back to Kanao, who was watching him with a look of pure reliance. He reached for the Nichirin Sword resting at his waist.

Kanao looked at him, puzzled.

"If one day… I can't resist the urge to eat you anymore," Soma said quietly, "then you must use this sword to cut off my head."

Kanao froze instantly. She began to shake her head violently.

How could she possibly do something like that? Cut off her Uncle's head?

That was something she could never do.

Something she would never do.

"This is for my sake too."

Soma looked at her, his voice firm and serious.

"If I lose myself to the hunger for human flesh… then living like that would be worse than death for me."

Seeing her still shaking her head frantically, he knew—this was too cruel to ask of a child.

But it was still better than the alternative—better than the day he might lose control and devour her.

"This is the only thing Uncle will ever ask of you."

Soma reached out and placed a hand on her shoulder, his tone resolute.

"I'm counting on you, Kanao."

He looked at her again, repeating the request with complete seriousness.

The girl could only stare at him blankly.

Her beautiful eyes were already misty with tears, silently pleading.

She could never do something so heartless. Never.

Soma couldn't bear to meet that gaze. He turned his head away and spoke as if it didn't matter.

"Of course… that day might never come. As long as I can suppress my hunger."

"As long as I can control the desire to eat human flesh."

He repeated the words again, as if trying to convince himself.

But deep down, he wasn't confident at all.

In all these years, no demon had ever been an exception—except Tamayo. And even Tamayo had once consumed flesh and blood. Though she had gradually modified her body to free herself from the need to devour humans, she still hadn't found a way to rid other demons of that craving.

As for the demon beside her, Yushiro—he could survive on only a tiny amount of human blood, without ever devouring people.

But that was because Yushiro had never become a demon through Muzan Kibutsuji. He had been turned by Tamayo's blood instead.

Of course… there were two more exceptions in the future.

Nezuko.

And Tanjiro.

As for himself…

He didn't believe he would be lucky enough to become one of those exceptions.

"Uncle… so all you need is to suppress the desire to eat flesh, right?"

Kanao asked softly, her eyes still shimmering with unshed tears.

"…Yes."

"Then… Uncle, can you eat this?"

The girl pulled out a small steamed bun she had been hiding inside her clothes.

Seeing her pull something out from there left him genuinely surprised. He clearly remembered searching all the things she'd hidden before.

Apparently he hadn't searched thoroughly enough.

Kanao had a habit of hoarding food like a little hamster, and it was a difficult habit to break.

Not that he had ever truly wanted to correct it.

"…Eating that won't help me." he said helplessly with a faint smile.

"It will help," Kanao insisted firmly. "If you eat until you're full, you won't feel hungry anymore."

"Ha…"

Soma almost laughed.

But when he saw the serious look in her eyes, he couldn't bring himself to do it.

Instead, he took the bun she offered and slowly began eating.

To him, it had no taste.

His demon senses couldn't detect the aroma of food. It felt like chewing dirt—dry and difficult to swallow.

"As long as you eat meals on time, you'll get better. You won't be hungry anymore. I'll make sure Uncle eats every day."

"If you eat until you're full… then you won't be hungry again."

The girl patted her small belly confidently.

She understood hunger well.

She had gone hungry many times before. But as long as she ate enough afterward, the hunger would disappear.

Soma looked at her and sighed inwardly at her innocence.

He wanted to explain that humans and demons weren't the same.

But when he saw the naive yet unwavering belief in her eyes… somehow, he found himself believing it too.

"…Heh. Maybe I'm just as naive."

He laughed quietly.

Then he took another large bite of the bun in his hand, chewing slowly—almost as if the gnawing hunger inside him was beginning to fade, little by little.

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