Chapter: The Choice That Was Never Mine
(Jay's POV)
"I can't do it anymore…"
My voice didn't even sound like mine.
It was shaking. Small. Weak.
We were standing near the staircase, where no one usually comes during class hours. The hallway was empty, but my heart was so loud I was scared someone would hear it.
Yuri didn't look angry.
That was what scared me the most.
He looked calm.
Too calm.
"I can't keep hurting him," I whispered, tears already falling. "I can't keep pretending. I can't keep pushing Keifer away like this."
Yuri sighed as if I had just complained about something small.
"Jay," he said softly, almost gently. "You can love him for now."
I froze.
"…What?"
"You heard me," he continued, stepping closer. "You can talk to him. You can smile with him. You can even love him."
My chest tightened.
"But when our wedding day comes," his voice dropped, colder now, "you will be mine."
The word mine didn't feel romantic.
It felt like a cage closing.
"Remember," he added, leaning slightly closer so only I could hear him, "you will marry me. Contract or not. Feelings or not. At the end, you belong beside me."
I felt like the air had disappeared.
He stepped back and gave me that same polite smile he shows everyone.
"Go on," he said. "Talk to him. I'm allowing it."
Allowing.
As if I was something to be permitted.
As if my heart was a toy he could lend and take back whenever he wanted.
My tears blurred everything.
I didn't wait.
I ran.
I didn't care that it was class time. I didn't care about teachers or rules or stares. I just ran through the corridor like my lungs were on fire.
I needed Keifer.
I needed him before I broke completely.
When I reached Section E, my hands were shaking so badly I almost couldn't slide the door open.
But I did.
The door burst open loudly.
Everyone turned.
Ci N.
Blaster.
David.
Emman.
Eren.
Drew.
Josh.
Rory.
Erdix.
Mayo.
Kit.
All of them stared at me like I had just walked in from a storm.
Maybe I had.
And then—
I saw him.
Keifer.
He was standing near the middle row, probably arguing with someone as usual. His eyes landed on me, confused at first.
Then concerned.
Then scared.
"Jay—?"
I didn't even think.
I ran straight into him.
My body crashed into his chest and I grabbed his uniform like it was the only thing keeping me alive.
And I broke.
I cried loudly.
Not silent tears.
Not hidden sniffles.
I sobbed.
The kind of crying that shakes your whole body. The kind that makes breathing hurt. The kind that comes from somewhere deeper than your heart.
"Keifer—" I choked, clutching him tighter. "Keifer…"
He didn't hesitate.
His arms wrapped around me instantly.
"Hey, hey… what happened?" His voice was panicked now. "Jay, look at me. What happened?"
But I couldn't answer.
I just cried harder.
The classroom was completely silent.
I could feel everyone staring.
Ci N was the first to move.
"What the hell happened?" he whispered harshly.
Blaster stood up. "Is this about Yuri again?"
My name sounded distant in my ears.
Keifer's hands were trembling slightly as he held my face, trying to make me look at him.
"Jay. Breathe. Please breathe."
But I couldn't.
Because Yuri's words kept repeating in my head.
You will be mine.
You will marry me.
You belong beside me.
"I don't want to," I cried out without meaning to. "I don't want to—"
Keifer's expression changed.
Confusion. Fear. Anger.
"Don't want to what?" he asked, his voice breaking.
Ci N was already pulling out his phone.
"I'm calling Aries," he muttered urgently. "This is bad."
I barely heard him.
Keifer hugged me again, tighter this time, like he was afraid I'd disappear.
"I'm here," he whispered desperately into my hair. "Whatever it is, I'm here. Don't cry like this… please don't cry like this."
But I couldn't stop.
My chest hurt.
My head felt light.
The classroom started spinning slightly.
Somewhere behind me, I heard Ci N's voice on the phone.
"Aries, come to Section E right now. Right now. She's not okay."
Time felt strange.
Everything felt too loud and too far at the same time.
Keifer kept talking to me, but his voice was fading in and out.
"Jay, look at me. Please. You're scaring me."
I tried.
I really tried.
But my vision was going dark at the edges.
And then—
The classroom door slammed open again.
Heavy footsteps.
Fast.
"Jay!"
Aries.
I turned slightly at the sound of his voice.
The moment I saw him, something inside me just… gave up.
Aries looked terrified.
He rushed toward us, pushing past desks, not caring about anything.
"What happened?!" he demanded.
No one answered.
Because I couldn't speak.
I could barely stand.
Keifer tightened his hold on me when he felt my knees weaken.
"Jay?" he said urgently. "Jay!"
The room was spinning now.
The faces around me blurred — Ci N, Blaster, David, all of them standing frozen.
I looked at Keifer one last time.
His eyes.
So scared.
So helpless.
I wanted to tell him I was sorry.
I wanted to tell him I loved him.
I wanted to tell him I was fighting for him.
But my lips wouldn't move.
Everything went quiet.
And the last thing I heard before darkness swallowed me—
Was Keifer shouting my name.
"JAY!"