This was a turning point that would affect Igor for the rest of his life. As much as he outwardly claimed the boy was a weapon, he did not wish to see him fueled by revenge. This defining moment was a precipice that could do just that. A third mistake could not be made.
"I'll try."
The click of a step echoed. Shuri stretched out her arms, her saddenned eyes taking in Igor's form.
"Give him to me."
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|DxD|- Chapter 40- Hypocrisy
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What does one do when the world crashes down not once, but multiple times? What happens when a worldview is spun around so many times you lose sight? His clan? Gone. His family? Perished…one by one.
Igor moved on from that. Or perhaps he buried it deep. But he learned to cope, learned to accept. He was no longer an open wound. He was scarred, but he was functioning.
From the beginning, Shuri was wary of letting Igor search for his mother alone. When Igor requested for help earlier this morning, a silent part of her had been adamant against opening old wounds. She knew what it did to people when scars were reopened.
Igor was gone for a year. Too much time had passed for him to see his mother's corpse. Wet clay can endure. Hardened clay cannot.
Baraquiel told her not to worry. He told her and Igor that after this long, he would find ashes. Those words changed the narrative to a barely acceptable scope. Igor would no longer be looking for his mother, but giving her remains a proper burial instead. He would be given privacy to find the tomb and collect the ashes. It was supposed to close a chapter in his past, so he could finally move on and accept the future.
That is what should have happened.
Shuri breathed in the air of leaf litter and open wounds. They were outside the tomb, the hastily dug entrance just three steps away. She held Igor in her embrace. Her stomach was wet, a willing price she paid for the silent comfort she gave him. He didn't wail. He didn't lash out. He was quiet…while his body shivered.
When pain becomes too much, the body stops processing it. The nerves shut down and grief swoops in like wild dogs that devour their prey alive.
Shuri did not say any words. She was his shield, his warmth, and his support. Igor was a strong boy. He would get through this. And she would help him every step of the way.
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|DxD|
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Love, a beautiful, yet dangerous emotion to feel. Devil society was structured specifically to avoid emotions of entrapment. Marriages and partnerships were formed through interest and logic. By logic, Cleria was 'friends' with Shuri only because it would be more beneficial to have her supervisor on good terms. That is what Diehauser believed…or used to.
Today showed him something completely different. His cousin, somehow, formed an illogical connection that superseded acceptable parameters.
Diehauser stood in the middle of the office. Cleria was seated on her chair. His brows were lowered both in thought and befuddlement. He wasn't angry, but he was not pleased as well. Where did he go wrong? He explicitly taught Cleria most of these things. Illogical and sentimental arrangements were dangerous—always!
"Cleria. I believe in understanding the root cause of anything before I pass judgement."
He raised his head. Perhaps his cousin had stayed in the human world for too long. Depending on her words, he might just have to bring her back to the clan…by force if needed.
"Your relationship with Shuri is cause for concern. You are too…accommodating, towards a foreign sovereignty. Plead your case to me."
Each word was heavy. Diehauser may seem calm, but Cleria knew he was angry. There was a lightness in her chest, a fear that stemmed from bearing the gaze of an authority. She forced herself not to look away, because she would defend her connection.
"Shuri is my friend."
His eyes narrowed and Cleria nearly flinched. An invisible hand grabbed her throat, threatening her to tread carefully. She gulped and forced herself to continue.
"I've known her for two years now. I did my due diligence and found out everything about her before…"
She swallowed.
"...before connecting with her on a deeper level."
Diehauser's expression was growing fiercer. It was a subtle lowering of his brow—not in disappointment nor snarling anger. It was more like looking at a power line stretched close to snapping.
"Cousin. Shuri is a good woman. I know no amount of political advantages can justify what you saw. So I ask that you please trust me. Shuri is not and will never be a threat—"
"On what basis?"
"Love."
An existential crisis seized her when she blurted out those words. Her cousin never hid his dislike for bonds of emotion. He always called them unreliable and superficial, but what she had with Shuri was real. A real friendship, a genuine tie with someone she could show her back without fear. It was strong, and she would defend it.
"Shuri is my best friend, my only friend. She will never betray me. I trust her with my life—"
"Enough."
Diehauser was conflicted. Cleria's words were more than sufficient charge to confine her in the Underworld for the next sixty years for proper education. By then, that Shuri would've long since passed on and Cleria would resume her role as an overseer, a proper one.
He could grab her. She wouldn't notice, wouldn't react until it was too late. She'd hate him, but better she hate him and be alive than for him to hold a corpse—
"Do you love me, cousin?"
Cleria interrupted suddenly. It was a rhetorical question.
"I am from the branch family. I have no conceivable benefits and offer no political advantages. Yet you have shown me more care than my very own parents who wanted to marry me off for the clan."
Cleria stood up and circled her desk.
"Did you know? My very first memories are of you. I even believed you were my father. Do you remember?"
"..."
'Papa! Look, look! I brought you a flower!'
By the time Diehauser pulled himself from the memory, Cleria was standing before him. Her arms wrapped around his waist and she spoke to him with watery eyes.
"I believe in love, cousin. You loved me, someone with no worth, as if I were your very own sister. It's kind of ironic, don't you think?"
She chuckled. He didn't, too caught in the war in his head.
"Cousin."
Cleria laid her head on his chest.
"I love you. So please trust me. Shuri is one of the very few good humans left. She's honest and she's kind."
She tightened the hug.
"Trust in me, Diehauser."
"..."
Diehauser took a deep breath and exhaled. He lost. He knew he lost. He lost completely without a chance to fight back.
"You are a good speaker, Cleria."
He wryly shook his head. Somehow, she twisted everything and framed it around herself, exploiting the feelings he had for her and mirroring them to Shuri. It was done perfectly, even ending in physical contact to evoke warmth…and he felt that warmth.
"Cleria."
He returned her hug and cradled her close. Perhaps just once, he would be honest. Because Cleria was right. He truly, deeply, and utterly, loved her beyond everything, even his own life.
"I have held you in my arms since you were an infant. I have watched you grow and blossom into the beautiful woman you are today. You are my cousin, my own flesh and blood. I will always wish the best for you and will do everything in my power to ensure that remains so."
He lowered his head and kissed her on the forehead. Such an intimate gesture was a hypocrisy to his beliefs, and his little cousin was the source of that hypocrisy.
"I care greatly for you, Cleria. I want you to be safe. I do not trust Shuri. But I do trust you. If you believe she is worthy of your protection, then I will…reluctantly put this matter aside and leave her to you."
"Really?!"
Cleria looked up with sparkling eyes. Good news in one day? She never felt happier. Her cousin acquiesced. He acquiesced!
"And you'll also stop researching Igor?"
"Don't push your luck."
Cleria deflated. She couldn't get a three out of three. But two was better than zero.
"Thank you, cousin. I promise you won't be disappointed."
She hugged him deeply once more and whispered.
"I knew you were a softie…"
"Don't push it, Cleria."
Still, Diehauser rubbed the back of her head.
[This is only a one-time concession. Never again.]
AN: I'll admit. I was close to disliking Diehauser. I'll reluctantly slot him back in my good books. Good work, Cleria.
On the other hand, I didn't upload on Friday because of certain circumstances. But chapters do auto-release on my p@treon. I promise this is not some ploy to coerce you there. If a weekday passes with no update, check my p@treon. There's either an announcement or an unlocked chapter.
And due to a necessary adjustment, I'll have to fall back to one chapter a day for roughly the next two weeks. A new priority entered my life and I can't devote as much time to writing. Thanks for understanding.
Chapter 40
END