Zein's Point of View
I didn't know if I should be happy or worried after hearing about the punishment Supremo handed to the people who hurt me. Yeah, I'd admit knowing he did that just to give me justice for the absolute trash they had put me through made me happy. Still, worry outweighed it because things might only get worse and affect everything he had built. I was worried and scared that everything he worked so hard for might fall apart... all because of me.
"Ms. Shion?"
I stood up and headed to Teacher Kath's desk. She handed me a mountain of paperwork. "Please put these in the stock room. Thank you."
I nodded. I glanced past Supremo, noticing he was about to stand up to help me, so I hurried out of the SSG office. We hadn't really been talking lately. That was my request—as much as possible, we had to limit our interactions in front of everyone else. I walked toward the stock room in a daze. The papers were heavy, but I was so deep in thought that I couldn't even feel the weight.
Our situation was getting to me, I'd admit. We weren't even a "thing" yet. We hadn't committed to anything or admitted anything. But deep in my bones, I knew that whatever this was, was mutual. And even so, it already felt like too much for everyone around us. I turned the knob and pushed the door, struggling a bit since the hinges were rusty. When the door opened, dust billowed out. I coughed as I breathed it in.
The room was packed with old papers and equipment that clearly hadn't been touched in forever. I set the files down on a table, sending another cloud of dust into the air that triggered another coughing fit. I felt someone behind me, so I quickly spun around. "A-Angel?"
Her lower lip was busted, her arm bandaged. I felt a pang of pity because I knew one of the gangs was responsible for that. "Are you happy now?" she asked, her voice dripping with bitterness and rage. "You're the queen now. Rank fourth, even. Isn't that enough for you?"
I kept my mouth shut because I didn't even know how to answer. No. That wasn't why I was happy. I never really cared about titles or power. As long as my friends were here, I had a reason to be happy. As long as he was here, staying in this hellhole felt a little more bearable.
"You have everything! Why do you have to get Supremo too?!"
I looked into her eyes and saw nothing but raw pain. She had feelings for him, which was why she was doing this. But I'd laugh at her if she called that love. Because it wasn't. It was an obsession. "Stay away from him," she whispered.
I found myself smiling almost unconsciously before shaking my head. I promised myself I wouldn't follow anyone else's orders but his. I will only obey an order if it comes from him. Only from Ace.
"Can't you see?! Your presence makes things harder for him. You're making his life harder. You're a burden to him!".
"YES! I KNOW!" I shouted, catching her off guard. My lips were trembling, not because of Angel, but because of the fact that she was right. "Do you think I'm enjoying this? If Supremo is having a hard time, then so am I—maybe even more! It kills me to see him hurting."
Tears finally started to fall. My whole body was shaking, and my heart felt like it was about to explode. I didn't know what to do anymore. I couldn't leave him, but I couldn't stand seeing him suffer either. I felt like I was stuck in a room with two exits, knowing that no matter which one I opened, I was going to end up hurt. Honestly, I'd rather just stay locked inside. I was too scared to choose.
"It's your fault. If you hadn't gotten close to him, you wouldn't have a hard time! Neither of you would be!"
"Do you think I chose to fall for him?" I let out a bitter laugh. "If you only knew how much I wanted to reject these feelings. If I had only known I'd end up here..."
Of all the worst possibilities I imagined when we got trapped in this hell, I never once thought I'd fall for the most important person here. "I-it was all an accident..." I whispered. Because it was. I didn't want to be trapped here. I didn't want our paths to cross. I was a victim here too.
Angel wiped her tears away. "I know you know what you have to do. Just stay away from him. Everything will go back to the way it was."
I shook my head firmly. Things could never go back to the way they were. What happened, happened. I couldn't go back to the time when Supremo meant nothing to me. To the time when I didn't feel this way about him.
"If you really love him, you will stop hurting him, Zein."
"And you think if I leave, he won't be hurt?"
"He'll be, but only for a while."
I shook my head. "I... I don't want to."
"Sorry..." was the last thing I heard from Angel before she slammed the door shut. I ran to the door and tried to force it open, but it was already locked. I screamed and screamed, but no one seemed to hear me.
I collapsed to the floor, pulling my knees to my chest and crying into the void. I wasn't scared of the dark. In fact, I preferred it over the light. It could keep everything hidden, including these feelings I could only admit to myself. Eventually, I ran out of tears. I didn't know how many hours I spent sitting there. What time was it? My friends must be looking for me by now. I hung my head. I have to make a choice when I get out of here. I couldn't just stay stuck in the middle. I have to choose and own it completely.
The lock clicked from the outside, so I stood up quickly and moved away from the door in case someone tried to kick it in. My heart pounded in my chest, as I was about to face the light again, which meant I had to be strong in front of others. I had to start pretending again. The door opened, and what I saw was more than I expected. There were two people standing right there in front of me: Ace and Matt.
My chest felt so tight I could barely breathe. "Zein!" Supremo rushed to me and pulled me into a hug. "Are you okay?" My eyes stayed fixed on the man standing just outside the door.
I have to choose.
Supremo pulled back from the hug and looked into my face. I felt my eyes stinging again. "Were you scared?" he asked calmly, only to be stunned when I brushed his hand aside and pulled out of his grip to go to Matt and hug him. I felt Matt's surprise, a small sob escaping my lips at the same time.
I haven't chosen yet. I don't want to choose. I just wanted to get away from Supremo for a moment. I needed to clear my head. Because whenever I was near him, the only thing I could think about was being with him. "Z-Zein?" Matt asked, sounding confused.
I let go of the hug and took Matt's hand so we could leave. But every step I took as I moved further away from Supremo felt like a stab to the heart. It hurts so much. I couldn't help but glance back at Supremo, who was just watching us with a serious expression. He stood there in the dark, silently watching us walk away.
Matt stopped walking. I tried to pull him, but he wouldn't budge. When I looked up, he just shook his head and gave me a small smile. I closed my eyes, let go of Matt's hand... and ran straight back to Supremo. He met me with a hug, and I held on even tighter. Damn! This fucking felt so wrong, but I couldn't just walk away from him.
"Supremo, I can no longer fight."
"You don't have to fight," he said. "I'll fight for you."