Chapter 7: Organization
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Doing things alone by oneself makes us face difficulties harsher than one another.
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Liu calmed down a few moments later, when she finally noticed that the noises had stopped.
And despite her fear, she took a glance through the window to see if the Form had moved.
'It hasn't moved an inch.'
She quickly looked away, the urge to vomit coming back as she looked at the Form.
"Ffou.." she let out a long sigh.
'We should still be in the second hour of the morning. I have enough time to prepare, but I need to leave before the end of the theoretical lesson. Yumi will probably skip the meal to come check if everything is okay.'
Liu still went down to the dining room to check the time. Where the only clock in the house was placed.
'Two hours and seventy-one hundredths. I need to put enough distance so they won't find me easily, and the Form must not be noticed.'
She began to plan her so-called escape. And even though she acted as if everything was fine, in truth, her whole body was trembling and her anxiety was growing.
'But will the Form follow me outside the village? Will it keep following me? Until when? Why?'
Even though Liu knew how to be rational in most situations, it was not absolute.
The current situation was completely new to Liu.
She had to make an important decision. Alone.
She had to plan something important.
Alone.
She had to do it quickly and alone.
All of this while enduring her fear, her anxiety, her uncertainty...
'Do I have to go outside? And go back out there with that Form?'
Fear.
Liu's fear had influenced her rationality. And made her ignore the responsibilities she had given herself.
'Why? Why should I do this? It's not my fault. I didn't ask for any of this. So why should I do all of this?'
She felt an injustice even stronger than when people mocked her for being abandoned by her parents.
'I don't want to go out. I don't want to leave. I don't want to be alone with that thing.'
"Damn it! I don't want any of this! If only I could go back in time."
She felt alone, abandoned by the world. It wasn't the first time she felt the world's indifference. And it wouldn't be the last.
'Is it even still there?' she wondered as she went back upstairs.
Deep down, she hoped for a miracle. Which of course never came.
'It's still there. Damn it!'
Like every time, she quickly looked away. Which made her look at her grandparents' room. That room where she spent most of her time.
'Ha, I'm still just as pathetic after all.'
She thought about Mimie, about papi Mo, about Pasha and about Yumi.
'Did I really almost give up? Seriously?' she was disappointed in herself, terribly disappointed.
"Am I really that weak?" she whispered while staring at the floor.
'Being weak leaves room for progress. I don't remember which of Chicken Joe's books it was, but I'm sure it's true!'
She motivated herself in her own way.
'And I've already fallen so low, I'm sure I can't fall any lower. Or at least I must not fall any lower.'
And so she managed to motivate herself in a rather negative way.
'Alright, how should I do this now?'
She looked once again through the window, checking that the Form was still there.
'It hasn't moved.'
That fact confirmed that she had to do something, and quickly. Ironically, it gave her a boost of motivation and confidence.
She was still afraid, especially of going back outside in the presence of that creature. But, thinking about the people she loved, she managed to control that fear.
'Running away is the best option. Well I'm not running away, I'm just leaving. The time to deal with all these damn problems.'
Even if it might not be the most logical solution for everyone. For Liu, it was.
Her conclusion to leave was part of her personality. She had never relied on anyone except her grandparents. Now that they were gone, she made the decision to rely only on herself.
'Actually, it's like I'm going camping, right? I'm used to camping, with Mimie and papi Mo we've done dozens of them.'
With legs still slightly trembling, Liu went back to check the time in the dining room. She saw that only six hundredths of an hour had passed.
"Okay!" she said to motivate herself once again.
'I must first gather everything I need to take.'
She first went to the storage room behind the dining room.
'Tent, sleeping bag, mattress, raincoat... mmm, that's all?'
She took what she thought was useful from the storage room, placed it on the dining table, then went upstairs.
Once in her room, she opened the wardrobe.
'I must not take too many things, otherwise I won't be able to carry everything. Two or three outfits max.'
She chose her sports outfit, a more casual normal outfit and she took her pajamas. She cared a bit too much about her pajamas.
'Should I take two bags? Will I have to run or not?'
She quickly stuffed her clothes into her sports bag that she used for school. And then she went into her grandparents' room.
'I need to take some books, even if it's heavy.' the books were one of the most important parts of Liu's life.
'Which ones should I take?'
She thought for a moment before taking four, including the one titled: "Think differently, live differently."
She went back to the dining room to place what she had taken upstairs. Of course she had not forgotten to stop by the bathroom to take what she needed, that is: a towel and a bar of soap, her toothbrush and her toothpaste, and toilet paper.
Her arms were full when she arrived in the dining room.
"Oof!"
She put everything down on the table, freeing herself from all that mess.
'So, where am I?' she took a step back to see if she had forgotten anything.
"Mmh..."
She couldn't tell if she had forgotten something.
'I took everything I had to take upstairs. But...'
"Do I have everything?" she asked out loud, as if she was expecting an answer.
'...' she sighed.
'Right, I have to check myself.'
Papi Mo was no longer there to tell her what she had forgotten.
"I should start packing."
So she started packing. She folded her clothes, put them in her sports bag with the books and her raincoat. She attached her sleeping bag, the tent and the mattress directly to her sports bag.
'It doesn't seem to take up too much space.'
The sleeping bag and the tent did not take up much space. The mattress took a bit more but it was not very thick, by folding it several times she could even have fit it into her sports bag if she hadn't put the books inside.
But, she had not taken everything into account. She was preparing the way she always did when she went camping with her grandparents. And so, as every time, she had not taken care of food and water.
After finishing her organization, Liu looked at the clock.
"Two hours and ninety-two hundredths."
She was satisfied with her efficiency.
'I still have time.'
With all this, it was almost as if she had forgotten the situation. As if she was really going camping.
But she suddenly remembered,
'I need to check if the Form has moved or not.'
She went upstairs again.
'Still hasn't moved? That's strange, can it sense my presence? Otherwise why would it stay there without moving when it can't see me? Can it even see?'
Liu drifted a little in her thoughts while going back down to the dining room. When she arrived, she looked at her sports bag that she used every time she went camping.
It was organized exactly as usual.
'What am I doing? Am I crazy?'
She was dismayed by her own actions. While preparing her things, she had completely forgotten her fear, her anxiety and her uncertainty.
'What's wrong with me?'
Lately she no longer recognized herself, just like she no longer recognized the world around her.
She was completely thrown off by all these new things. And she realized it rather brutally, according to her.
'Am I really stupid or what?'
She slapped her cheek with her left hand, to get her gears turning again.
'I need to wake up.'
"Alright! Food! Water! Money! And something to defend myself."
She went back to the storage room, and headed toward the chest at the back on the right. She used a bit of electrical energy that she had condensed while walking to open the chest.
Inside was her grandparents' reserve of money, as well as a few small storage pouches.
Liu took one of the small pouches, in which she placed as much money as possible, citizen coins and noble bills.
Then after closing the chest, she took her favorite sports weapon: throwing daggers, from one of the shelves next to the chest. Throwing daggers was her favorite activity during sports classes.
On her way out of the storage room, she took three flexible flasks from the shelf next to the door.
She placed everything on the dining table.
'It doesn't take up much space.'
She then went to the cupboards in the dining room.
'I'll just take camping rations, I'll buy the rest at the merchant village.'
She had decided to head toward the merchant village. The nearest merchant village was six hours of walking away, and Liu would take about two days to get there.
'And I'll fill two of the flex flasks. Anyway I'll follow the river.' Liu liked to list her actions, it helped her remember them better.
In the plains of Lumeno, one could find a merchant village almost anywhere, with about ten hours of walking between each merchant village. That made about three days of relaxed walking.
But for Liu and her grandparents, doing it in two days was very easy. They only needed to condense speed energy and endurance energy for a few hours before leaving.
Liu had therefore decided to go around all the merchant villages of Lumeno, until she had solved her problems and could return home.
"And there!" said Liu after putting the pouch filled with money, the camping rations, the flasks and her daggers into her sports bag.
'It's completely full.' she noted.
She checked one last time that she had not forgotten anything.
'Clothes, books, rations, water, weapons, money, tent, sleeping bag, mattress... ah right I also need to take a watch.'
She went once again to the storage room and took one of the three watches her family owned. Next to the watches was a map of the Lumiscen kingdom region where she lived.
Seeing it, Liu exclaimed, "Ah right! I almost forgot one of the most important things."
She took the map and returned to the dining room. She checked one last time the contents of her bag and everything she was taking.
"Ok, everything is good."
She looked at the time, "Three hours and twelve hundredths. Perfect."
'Ok, now I have to go outside and leave.'
She wanted to motivate herself, but just thinking about going outside made her shiver.
'Is the Form still there after all this time?' she went to check.
'Why isn't it moving? What does it want from me? It doesn't seem to want to attack me. I don't understand.'
While thinking about the reasons behind the Form's actions, she went upstairs one last time into her grandparents' room. This time she took her time, she looked at everything. Not knowing when she would come back, she wanted to imprint all of it into her memory.
She looked at the bed. The bed where papi Mo lounged most of the time.
She looked at the desk. The desk where Mimie wrote her books.
She looked at the bookshelf. The bookshelf where all the books Mimie had written were stored, surrounded by those of Scrat and Chicken Joe.
And finally she looked at the couch. The couch where she read every day. Her couch.
After taking it all in. She closed her eyes for a few seconds while standing in the center of the room, on the carpet she hated so much.
...
She opened her eyes, looked through the window and saw the Form.
'It still hasn't moved. Alright.'
She was definitely convinced that her decision was the right one.
'I don't think it will jump on me as soon as I go outside. Otherwise it would have already done it.'
She went downstairs.
Took her bag.
Put it on her back.
Walked to the door.
Stopped right in front of it.
Took a deep breath.
"Let's go."
Then, she opened the door.
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Beginning of the second Arc: Turning Point.