My name is Nara Shikaku.
My father is the head of the Nara clan and the head of Konoha's Advisory Department.
My friends are Yamanaka Inoichi and Chōza.
Chōza is a very gentle person, but he's a little afraid of other people's judgmental looks—especially when it comes to comments about his body.
Yamanaka Inoichi is extremely thoughtful and delicate, though he's a bit vain. He has a strange obsession with flowers.
Yesterday, the three of us enrolled in the Ninja Academy together.
There seem to be a lot of troublesome people here.
We all introduced ourselves.
Everyone could've just lived ordinary, uneventful school lives, and then stepped into the cruel life of a ninja later on.
But what the hell are you troublesome people doing?
That blond kid.
Do you really need to be that serious? Even the teacher's offhand jokes—you're writing them down?
Is that really necessary?
I glance to the left.
That dumpling-nosed kid… he's from the Senju clan, right?
What's he doing with his hands?
One sheet of paper he's holding has a bit of dust drifting on it, and the other looks like it has a faint trace of moisture.
That bastard isn't practicing chakra nature transformation, is he?
Isn't that something you're supposed to learn way later?
Damn it. My dad practices that stuff at home all the time.
Then I look to the right.
What's that bastard from the Uchiha clan doing?
Why are his hands moving so fast?
Damn it—we're only five years old! Why are you forming hand seals that fast?!
Then I look at those two boys wearing sunglasses.
What are they sneaking around doing?
Playing with bugs?
Great.
Finally, some normal people in this class.
But wait… what are those strange shapes?
Shikaku takes out a paper bomb tag he'd worked so hard to secretly steal.
Why do those shapes look exactly the same as the ones the bug boys are making?
Damn it.
I don't care what you people are doing anymore—you're no longer the kind of normal classmates I like.
Ah…
My heart is so tired.
Maybe I'll just watch someone fall in love. Even though romance sounds troublesome too...it's still better than these bastards.
Mm.
Having a beautiful companion—that's one of life's great pleasures.
Hm?
You're teasing a dog with chakra strings?
You bastard.
Stop teasing the dog and go play with the girl next to you!
You bastard!
Don't use chakra to form all kinds of shapes just to make the girl happy!
Just destroy everything.
I'm tired.
Then, unintentionally, I glance over and see a certain Byakugan boy, something flashing constantly beneath his feet.
I'm not looking anymore.
It's definitely not good news.
"Waaah…"
"Shikaku, what's wrong? Why are you crying?"
Yamanaka Inoichi beside him hurriedly asked.
Chōza, who had been eating snacks, also put them down and looked at Nara Shikaku with concern.
"Inoichi, Chōza… do you think it's still possible for me to transfer to another class?"
"Uh… the chances are pretty small. And I heard this class is really popular. People outside are fighting to get in."
"Yeah, yeah. My old man said this class is pretty great too. He told us to make lots of friends."
"Waaah… I'm crying for my miserable future. Inoichi, Chōza, we're finished. Our school life is going to be bleak and hopeless."
"What do you mean, Shikaku?"
"Shikaku, just tell us. I'll listen to you."
"Let's start tomorrow. I'll make a training plan for you."
"Okay, Shikaku. I'll listen to you."
"That's right, Shikaku. You arrange everything."
"Fine. Let me cry my heart out today. My beautiful life… my wonderful life of sleeping twenty hours a day… it's over before it even began. These damn try-hards… they're going to grind me to death with their competition."
Yamanaka Inoichi and Chōza looked at the sobbing Nara Shikaku, clutching his head.
They were extremely puzzled about why he was crying so heart-wrenchingly.
But since he was smart, they figured it was best to just listen to him.
Chōza went back to eating snacks.
Inoichi took out a mirror and continued grooming himself.
And Nara Shikaku kept crying with his head in his hands.
Anyone who saw the three of them couldn't help but sigh.
What a perfectly qualified Ino–Shika–Chō trio.
...
Classes where everyone secretly messes around always seem to end very quickly.
Before long, it was time for school to end.
Everyone headed home.
Nara Shikaku went to find his father, the current head of the Nara clan.
"Old man, give me the Ino–Shika–Chō training plan. And the cultivation methods for the Nara clan's secret techniques."
???
How old are you again?
You're only five and already talking about training?
And you're volunteering to train?
Are you really a child of the Nara clan?
Back when I was your age—even during the late Warring States period and the early days of Konoha—I didn't start that early.
What's wrong with you?
Are you sure you're even my biological son?
The Nara clan head took out two scrolls and handed them to him.
"Kid… how about thinking it over again?"
Since when has the Nara clan ever had a five-year-old who voluntarily trained?
Honestly, I'd love to agree...but those bastards won't allow it.
With tears on his face, Shikaku said,
"No. Give them to me."
After taking the scrolls, he ran back to his room crying.
The Nara clan head was completely baffled.
Take them if you want, but why are you crying? Did Kyoko scold him too harshly again?
He hurried to ask Shikaku's mother, Nara Kyoko.
"Did you scold Shikaku again?"
"Of course not. Besides, aren't all you Nara the same? No matter how much you're scolded, you never change."
"Then why did he suddenly ask me for scrolls so he could train?"
"How would I know… wait, did you say Shikaku is training voluntarily?"
"That's right."
Before he could finish speaking—
Nara Kyoko suddenly dropped to her knees on the floor, quietly sobbing.
"I have finally improved the Nara family genes! At last our clan has produced a hardworking person! Waaaah! Our ancestors will be honored! Honored ancestors, it must be my superior genes overpowering his father's. If he had inherited his dad's genes, the Nara clan would truly have no future…"
Kyoko… that's a bit harsh.
The Nara clan head thought to himself.
But he didn't say anything.
Making a woman angry at a time like this—and then trying to comfort her—would be far too troublesome.
...
At that very moment, the "honor of the Nara clan," Nara Shikaku, sat in his room with tears streaming down his face, a pen in hand.
Crying as he wrote:
"Damn Inuzuka clan's Ryoha Inuzuka. Damn Aburame clan's Aburame Shibi and Shiken Aburame. Damn Uchiha clan's Kamito Uchiha. Damn Senju clan's Hideki Senju. Damn Hyūga clan's Hiyasu Hyūga, Hyūga Hiashi, Hyūga Hizashi… actually you guys didn't do much, I'll spare you. Damn blond Namikaze Minato. Always competing, always grinding—I'll grind you all to death."
Written on the papers were titles like:
"Chakra Training Manual I"
"Chakra Control Improvement Manual I"
"Chakra Growth Strategy Draft I"
"Soul Power Training Manual I"
"Plan #1: How to Make Chōza Train Hard"
"Plan #1: How to Make Inoichi Train Seriously"
"1000086 Plans for Revenge on Those Disgusting, Shameless People Who Prevent Nara Shikaku From Slacking Off Properly After I Succeed in Training"
...
"I hate try-hards."