Chapter 10: "Elites" and the Slacker
Haruko looked at the pretty face close at hand; the warm, fragrant breeze blew against his face, making his nose itch.
'How do I explain this? Say that I can absorb Natural Energy just by lying flat, and I can help you soothe the rampaging Cursed Seal just by petting you like a cat? I'm afraid I'll be sent to the Root to be sliced up for research in the next second."
"I didn't do anything. I didn't even know what your situation was, Teacher, I just saw that you were in a lot of pain and wanted to carry you to the hospital."
"Is that so?" Anko narrowed her eyes and leaned closer, their nose tips almost touching. "Why are you so nervous?"
Haruko felt like a frog being stared at by a snake. He steeled his heart and decided to just let it all hang out.
He looked away, his voice dropping, carrying a hint of awkwardness.
"If I have to say... it's just that I think you have a great figure, Anko-sensei, and you're very beautiful..."
Anko was stunned. She had anticipated that Haruko would find an excuse to brush her off, but she never expected such a... straightforward answer.
Immediately, she noticed their current state, and a blush spread from her fair cheeks.
"Ahem!" She coughed lightly, straightened her body, and raised her hand to tap Haruko on the head.
"You brat, who did you learn to be such a smooth talker from!"
Although she said that, the trace of inquiry and interrogation in her eyes had quietly dissipated.
She knew Haruko wasn't telling the truth, but she couldn't be bothered to pursue it further.
The Cursed Seal was definitely not something Haruko could come into contact with; the incident at that time must have been an accident, and Haruko might not even have realized what he had done.
Everyone had their own secrets; as long as it wasn't harmful to Konoha, it was fine.
Anko curled her lips into a mischievous smile, leaned into Haruko's ear, and whispered in a voice only the two of them could hear: "Then next time, I'll trouble you to 'take me to the hospital' again, okay? HaaRuko little brother"
Shiver!
A moist sensation came from his ear, and Haruko felt goosebumps rise all over.
'This enchantress is disturbing my state of mind!"
"Anko-sensei?!" Haruko put on a panicked look. Since he had set up this persona, he had to keep acting.
Seeming to find Haruko's reaction amusing, Anko let out a happy laugh.
...
In the woods, chaotic noises rose one after another.
"Damn cat! If you have the guts, don't run! You stand still!"
Bursts of "Meow" screams accompanied Ichi's exasperated roars.
Clearly, he had adopted a "fierce chase" tactic, but it only resulted in him running around the world chasing the cat's butt.
The terrain in the forest was complex, and he soon lost track of it.
Next was Makire; although he had rich theoretical knowledge, his practical combat ability was not strong.
The various traps he had carefully laid seemed so clumsy in the face of the cat's keen perception and agile body.
The cat-catching net was deftly avoided, the box coated with catnip was slapped over by the cat with one paw, and he was even chased for two miles by a passing wild boar.
A whole day passed in such chaos and farce.
When the sun set and the afterglow stained half the sky red, the exhausted Ichi and Makire dragged their weary bodies and returned to the meeting point, covered in dust.
"It's all your fault! Makire! Those bullshit traps of yours were useless! And they wasted my time!" Ichi panted heavily with anger.
"Nonsense! If it weren't for you blindly rushing in and scaring the cat away, my traps might have succeeded!" Makire didn't show weakness either, his voice not loud but filled with anger.
Anko looked at these two brats who were like fighting cocks, her mouth twitched, and she cast her gaze toward the tree next to them.
Haruko was still leaning against the tree trunk, eyes slightly closed, a hint of comfort on his face.
It was as if—no, it was that he hadn't participated in this mission at all, just had an afternoon nap here.
Veins popped on Anko's forehead. These two brats had worn themselves out, yet this guy who should have put in the most effort was actually slacking off here!
"Haruko!" There was already a hint of danger in Anko's voice.
"Here!" Haruko jumped up with a start.
"Do you have nothing to say?" Anko crossed her arms and looked down at him.
Facing the three scrutinizing gazes, Haruko spoke solemnly.
"Regarding this mission, I believe the core point of our review is that the team encountered a methodological divergence dilemma in the initial stage, leading to the failure of the action path to form an effective closed loop. The Root cause is that we lacked a deep excavation of core needs, thus failing to build a landing-capable, multi-dimensional, and refined execution matrix..."
The buzzwords from his past life came out instantly, and Ichi and Makire were stunned on the spot.
"Speak human language!" The more Anko heard, the more wrong it sounded, and she reached out and grabbed Haruko's ear.
"Go catch that cat for me! Otherwise, you'll be feeding the mosquitoes here tonight!"
Haruko gasped.
Sleeping in the open? Sleeping on the hard ground? And getting covered in mosquito bites?
It seemed he couldn't slack off anymore.
Haruko rubbed his burning ears and sighed helplessly.
"Really, you have to force me... I just wanted to be a quiet salted fish."
He closed his eyes and formed a hand seal.
"Wind Release: Breeze, Detection Technique."
A stream of Chakra mixed into the wind and spread out to the surroundings.
The inspiration for this move came from the Rain Tiger at Will Technique; it was a small life hack he developed to make it easier to find schools of fish.
Mixing Chakra into water flow to sense the surrounding environment like radar, and this time, it was Chakra mixed into the wind.
"Found it." Haruko opened his eyes and rushed out directly.
'It's the first time using this combination, let's call this move Detection Wind."
The three looked at each other and followed, half-believing and half-doubting.
A moment later, they indeed saw Tora, the cat that had made them look like a mess all afternoon, under a tree.
"It's there!" Ichi wanted to rush up excitedly.
"Don't move." Haruko grabbed his collar and pulled him back.
"Earth Release: Earth House."
Haruko pressed one hand on the ground, and the ground on the opposite side of Tora sank silently, forming an arc-shaped earthen pit about half a meter wide and deep. The whole process didn't even raise a speck of dust.
"What's the use of such a narrow and shallow pit? That cat can jump over it in one go."
Makire raised a question; he knew very well that ordinary traps were of no use to that cat.
"That's hard to say."
Haruko didn't care, he picked up a stone and threw it at Tora.
The startled Tora darted out immediately, and Haruko followed closely behind.
In the blink of an eye, he reached the pit, and Tora leaped—
Haruko formed hand seals, and a lid rose from the other side of the pit, directly blocking Tora.
Tora reacted extremely quickly, its claws grabbing the earthen lid, and it was about to jump out before the lid closed.
"Wind Release: Fly Swatter."
Haruko had been prepared, and a colorless wind ball slapped Tora into the pit.
The lid closed, and Tora became a turtle in a jar.
Watching Haruko grab the cat by the scruff of its neck and pull it out, Ichi and Makire were completely petrified.
The two "elites" had tossed and turned all day, making a mess of things.
As a result, the one they treated as a slacker got it done in five minutes.
Tora seemed to like Haruko very much, acting incredibly tame in his hands, even actively burrowing into his arms.
"Wow, don't rub all that dirt on me!" Haruko looked disgusted, used Earth Release to make a cage, and stuffed the cat inside.
"Anko-sensei, can we finish work now."
Anko observed the earthen pit carefully, lost in thought.
In terms of scale alone, this Earth Release and Wind Release were pitifully weak.
But that precise control was something many Jonin couldn't do!
And she suspected that Haruko wasn't unable to use larger-scale Ninjutsu, but just too lazy to use them.
She had found a treasure.
Anko looked at Haruko with burning eyes, revealing a sly smile.
Haruko shuddered, knowing he had shown off too much today.