"Ha... ha..."
Air no longer entered my lungs properly.
I couldn't tell when my body had started refusing to move.
The voice inside my head had become louder than my own breathing.
And when everything disappeared for a brief moment, it was over.
I tossed the wooden sword aside and collapsed onto my bedroom floor.
'Hard.'
I looked up at the wall clock. I couldn't see my own face, but I was certain I was frowning.
Four minutes.
A ridiculous number to call an achievement.
And after an entire week, I still hadn't even reached half of it.
No progress...
I clenched my fist, then slowly opened it again, feeling that familiar heaviness rising inside me.
'Damn this body.'
The more I trained, the weaker I became.
I lay there for an unknown amount of time before growing bored and finally leaving my room.
I decided to visit that idiot. In my previous life, around this time, he had already become famous for his talent with the sword.
'Just thinking about it makes my stomach sink.'
I hated the idea, but I knew better than anyone that the best people to learn from were your enemies.
I could make that concession for the sake of my goal.
I quickened my pace, though it hardly made a difference with these short legs.
After a while, I stopped in front of a door.
I knocked once.
Then again.
Only after several attempts did it finally open.
The door creaked open slowly.
He wasn't dead, but he certainly looked like it.
Dull eyes.
Pale skin.
Sunken cheeks.
His eyes met mine, and the moment he recognized me, I thought I saw a spark flicker within them.
'I hate this.'
I hated it.
That was why I'd stayed as far away from him, and everything related to him, over the past two weeks.
"William!"
I tried to run, but the difference in our size settled the matter immediately.
I gave up as the ground drifted farther and farther away while the world spun around me.
"Stop... ha..."
He only stopped when I was on the verge of throwing up.
'Who picks up a child and spins him around like that? That's dangerous.'
He lunged in for another hug.
I sidestepped him, and he crashed onto the floor like a puppet whose strings had been cut.
Not a trace of pity stirred within me.
"...?"
No.
Just look at those stupidly huge eyes.
An unpleasant sense of relief settled over me.
Unfortunately, he recovered almost immediately and smiled.
'What a shame. If only I'd made him cry.'
I sincerely hoped he was only pretending to be happy.
'That little demon can go to hell.'
"William, do you need something?"
I silently shook my head and walked into his room without permission.
I was genuinely surprised.
Judging from his condition, I'd assumed his room would be a complete mess.
I'd heard he'd been refusing to see anyone.
For a moment, I hesitated.
But who would've thought it would be this spotless?
Just imagining the filth I'd expected...
"What are you doing? Come in."
I picked one of the sofas and sat down.
"Would you like something to eat?"
"No."
"Something to drink?"
"No."
At my answers, he furrowed his brows in thought.
Without saying a word, he hurried out of the room.
He returned a moment later carrying a tray of pastries.
Smiling, he held one up.
"You need to eat more."
"Because you're a kid."
"..."
He ate one himself.
Half of it disappeared in a single bite.
Only after swallowing everything did he speak again.
"This is how you're supposed to eat."
The moment he realized what he'd said, he hurried to correct himself.
"I mean... you should eat a lot, like me."
I turned my head away and studied the decorations.
Then I felt sweet cream melting inside my mouth...
That was refreshing...
If someone hadn't just shoved half a pastry into my mouth.
"Even if Mom isn't here, you still can't skip your meals."
From his eyes to the faint tremor in his hands...
He was completely serious.
"For Mom to come back, you have to be a good boy."
Smack.
I slapped his hand away and took the pastry myself.
He stared at me in stunned silence.
"You're so mean."
Silence.
Resting his head against one hand, he spoke in a quiet voice.
"Was... Mom a bad person?"
I finished the pastry in my hand.
Then I reached for another, ignoring his nonsense.
"Father, Charlotte, the servants..."
"Everyone acts like she never existed."
"Did they forget her?"
"William... you're sad too, aren't you?"
I focused on the sweetness.
For some reason...
It tasted good.
Probably because it was made with apples.
I made a mental note.
I'll have this served for breakfast from now on.
Only then did I turn my attention back to the suffering boy.
In this life, just as in the previous one, he wasn't much different from his father.
The older he became, the more obvious it would be.
Watching him struggle to understand his own feelings...
To the point of seeking answers from a child younger than himself...
'Amusing.'
"What's wrong with that?"
"Huh?"
The air froze as he stared at me in disbelief.
"She's dead."
"That's what happens when people die."
The weight that had been bothering me for so long finally grew a little lighter.
"Instead of wasting your time thinking about useless things..."
"It would've been better if you'd done something before she died."
His eyes darkened, confusion spreading across his face.
His lips opened and closed like a fish as he tried to say something.
I cut him off.
"She's dead."
"The dead don't come back."
Feeling that my words had been more than enough, I left.
**
The moment William left, silence filled the room.
Edward remained staring at the door.
His shock lasted only a short while before he bent over.
"Urgh...!"
He retched violently, clutching his stomach.
A sharp pain twisted through his abdomen, and a wave of nausea left him struggling to breathe.
He collapsed onto the floor.
The door opened.
A pair of shoes entered his field of vision.
A woman with green eyes and brown hair approached him.
"Young Master..."
"Laila..."
She turned immediately.
"I'll call the doctor."
"No."
"I'm fine."
She looked back at him.
He was pale, drenched in sweat.
Grinding her teeth, she helped him back onto the bed.
Her gaze shifted to the tray on the table.
Only two pastries remained.
"Hehe... I didn't eat all of those."
Laila narrowed her eyes.
Edward only smiled sheepishly.
"You weren't supposed to eat any in the first place."
"A little won't hurt."
"..."
"I understand."
"I'm sorry."
"I won't do it again."
Edward eventually gave in.
Laila was his knight, and the person who knew him best.
He wasn't supposed to eat anything sweet.
He understood that perfectly.
But...
His cloudy eyes slowly became clearer.
And as they did, the smile on his face widened.
It had been nice watching William eat.
I'll have the servants serve those pastries to him at breakfast.
That thought came to an abrupt halt when he remembered William's final words.
"She's dead."
They had been cold.
Filled with hatred.
It wasn't the words themselves that haunted him.
It was those eyes...
They had shone with something oppressive, far removed from anything a child's eyes should hold.
The comfort he had felt vanished.
In its place...
Only unease remained.