Chapter 63: Have a Glass of Oolong Tea, The Kind That Makes Your Head Spin!
....
"Yeah, can't you tell?" Seito responded casually.
"But..." Hideyoshi Kinoshita counted the heads in the group, his face a mask of bewilderment. "With this many people, wouldn't a restaurant be better? Why come to a fast-food joint?"
Hideyoshi couldn't wrap his head around it. There were ten people in Seito's party. Why were they settling for burgers and curry?
"Don't worry about the details," Seito waved him off. He turned to the rest of the group.
"Why are you guys just standing there? Come on, let's push some tables together."
At his call, the group reluctantly moved toward him. The Yukinoshita sisters, Kirukiru Amou, and Hidenori's two "idiot" friends looked like they wanted the floor to swallow them whole. It was incredibly awkward.
Eating at a fast-food place alone was fine.
Even a group was fine. But following Seito was a different story entirely—if he didn't watch his mouth, they were all going to be humiliated.
Half the restaurant was already staring.
Seito noticed the eyes on him, but instead of feeling embarrassed, he smoothed his hair, put on a look of deep, sorrowful melancholy, and struck a pose while gazing out the window.
Everyone is staring? Well, they must be captivated by my peerless beauty.
Seeing his "shining" appearance, several young girls and even a few older women nearby whispered about how "captivating" he looked. Meanwhile, the men in the restaurant felt a collective surge of annoyance.
It's just a handsome face! Quit showing off!
Eventually, the group settled into their seats. Shiro naturally hopped into Seito's lap, sitting there with quiet, feline grace.
A waitress approached, her eyes lingering on Seito, who clearly looked like the "leader" of this chaotic ensemble. "Hello, sir. What can I get for you all?"
"Bring us ten of your most expensive deluxe sets!" Seito declared.
"Stop! Wait! Hold on!" Hidenori jumped up, frantically cutting Seito off.
"What now?" Seito asked, confused.
"What do you mean 'what now'?!" Hidenori leaned in, whispering urgently into Seito's ear. "Budget constraints! Have some mercy on my wallet!"
Seito had a sudden epiphany. Ah, right—he was broke. That was an easy fix.
He turned back to the waitress. "Does this place... hire people on short notice?"
The waitress blinked, unsure of where he was going with this, but nodded. "We are hiring, yes."
"Great!" Seito pointed a thumb at Hidenori.
"Let this guy work for you for the afternoon. He probably doesn't have enough to cover the bill."
Hidenori: "..."
Waitress: "..."
"That's your brilliant solution?!" Hidenori's eyes nearly popped out. Seito was determined to see him suffer today. He took two deep breaths and turned to Tadakuni and Yoshitake. "Guys, can you help me—"
Before he could finish, his two "best friends" looked away, suddenly finding the wall decor fascinating.
True brothers indeed! Hidenori felt like he was going to cough up blood from pure rage.
"Don't panic," Seito's voice drifted from behind him. Hidenori turned to see Seito holding out a glass of Oolong Tea with a playful grin. "Just a joke. I wouldn't actually make you go bankrupt. Here, have some tea."
Hidenori let out a long sigh of relief, cold sweat dripping from his forehead. "Man, you nearly gave me a heart attack."
He grabbed the glass and downed it in one go.
The next second...
"PUUUFFFFFFF!!!"
Hidenori sprayed the liquid across the table and slammed the glass down. "That is not Oolong Tea! That's 96% alcohol!"
Seito remained perfectly calm. "It's a little joke~ Besides, you won't care about the price once you're unconscious. Efficiency, right?"
Hidenori froze. Drinking until I pass out so I don't feel the pain of spending money... it sounds logical, but why does it feel so wrong?
Seito ignored his existential crisis and turned back to the waitress. "Ten standard curry sets, please."
"Right away."
The "Hideyoshi" Standard.
As they waited, Seito pulled Shiro back into his lap and looked at Hachiman. "Master Hikigaya, do you happen to like 'Hideyoshis' like Saika over there?"
Hachiman: "???"
Everyone: "???"
What does 'Hideyoshis like Saika' even mean?
"Excuse me, I am a man!" Hideyoshi interjected sternly.
Seito didn't answer. He simply looked out the window toward the public restrooms across the street. Everyone's eyes followed his gaze.
There, sandwiched between the Male and Female restrooms, was a large, clearly marked third door with the sign:
HIDEYOSHI.
Everyone: "..."
The group's gaze turned toward Hideyoshi Kinoshita with a mix of pity and confusion. Saika Totsuka also received a fair share of the "identity-questioning" looks.
"This... this is..." Hideyoshi was stunned. When did I become a third gender? Is this world truly so bizarre?
Thankfully, the food arrived. Being a fast-food joint, the service was lightning-fast. Seito and the three "idiots" immediately began shoveling curry into their mouths.
Five minutes later, Seito finished his meal and began absentmindedly patting Shiro's head as she ate her tiny portions with elegant, dainty bites.
"By the way," Hideyoshi said, finally finding his voice. "Did you know our class started a guild in God's Domain?"
"A class guild?" Seito paused. He hadn't heard anything about this. "Who started it?"
"Kaguya Shinomiya," Hideyoshi replied.
"The eldest daughter of the Shinomiya Group."
Seito nodded slowly. That made sense. Kaguya's brother was already a major player in the game's corporate expansion. It was only natural for her to organize her classmates into a subsidiary power.
...
Thank you for reading.