After the pink angel disappeared beyond the doors, the only sound that remained in the Vault of Wisdom was the faint rustling of countless scraps of paper cutting through the air.
Remaining afloat in mid-air, I extended a few ink-like tentacles, engaged in the task of storing away the Enochian translation runes that had scattered during my conversation with Victim, as well as the related reference materials I had temporarily pulled up, back into their original bookshelves.
My hundreds of pupils traced different pages simultaneously, reconstructing the index within my brain. Perfect silence and extremely efficient information organization.
It was the most relaxing time for me.
"Slither... I'm bored."
Shattering that perfect silence was the massive, pitch-black serpent coiled in the darkness to the right.
Apep opened his giant jaws wide in sheer boredom and exhaled violent, toxic purple steam like a sigh.
The stone paving on the floor sizzled and melted slightly where the steam touched it.
"Hey, Keeper of Omniscience. Do you have anything interesting to read? This space is packed with enough knowledge to make one nauseous. Keep me company to kill some time."
"This is not a recreation room, Apep. It is the sanctuary entrusted with Nazarick's wisdom."
From the darkness on the left, Ra ruffled his golden wings reprovingly.
A heat haze like a burning sun rose solely around him.
While continuing my storage task, I slightly turned my body of black fog toward them.
"I don't mind. A vast amount of knowledge is nothing more than bundles of paper if it isn't read. What genre do you desire, Apep?"
"Let me see... A gruesome account of curses that makes the blood boil and the flesh dance would be nice. Or perhaps the ecological records of a mighty magical beast that once plunged this YGGDRASIL into terror. All these moldy magic circle calculation formulas make me want to vomit."
Saying so, Apep deftly moved the tip of his long tail, flicking away a thick grimoire that had been orbiting me.
I hurriedly extended a tentacle and caught the book in mid-air.
"Do not treat it roughly. That is the original manuscript for the 『8th Tier: Astral Body Interference Theory』."
"I don't care. I don't like the smell. It's stained with Holy-attribute magic; it feels like my tongue is going numb."
Apep clicked his tongue in annoyance, though since he was a snake, he simply flicked his long tongue with a hiss.
"Your tastes are as exceptionally vicious as always, Serpent of Gluttony."
Ra shook his giant bird neck in exasperation and lightly struck the floor with his golden spear.
"Tawil Balah. I request the epic poem 『The Fall of the Valkyrie』. Volume Six, the Chapter of Thunder."
"Understood."
I threw a query into the sea of my thoughts and instantly dragged the corresponding two books from the invisible bookshelves.
One was the 『Abyssal Dweller Anatomy Record』, tailored to Apep's request. It was a cursed object bound in the flayed skin of a real demon.
The other was the epic poem with a solemn binding requested by Ra.
Using two tentacles, I made the books gently levitate right in front of each giant god.
"Hoh... Not a bad binding. The skin on the cover is still faintly pulsating with magic power."
Apep deftly opened the book with his magic power, narrowing his giant eyes to peer at the pages.
"『...Its tentacles secrete acid, turning all who touch it to mud.』 Hmph, compared to my venomous fangs, this is child's play, but I suppose it will pass the time."
On the other hand, Ra enveloped his book in golden light, turning the pages with a solemn attitude.
"『...The spear of thunderbolts that cleaves the heavens scorches the silver wings of the fallen Valkyrie...』 Mmm. No matter how many times I read it, the tactical descriptions in this chapter are magnificent. It perfectly incorporates the advantage of elevation in aerial combat into poetic expression. The author's tactical eye is highly commendable."
"Ra, are you reading an epic poem as a military manual? What a boorish fellow."
"Records of battle are equivalent to lessons. I am unlike you, possessing the atrocious taste of simply licking up cruel descriptions for pleasure."
Two Level 100 defense units, who just minutes ago had solidified their absolute loyalty and will to defend, were now engaging in a trivial squabble, acting exactly like students arguing over their favorite books in a library during lunch break.
I narrowed my hundreds of eyes, this was my expression of a smile, and quietly watched the scene unfold.
"Tawil, what about you?"
Suddenly, Ra turned his gaze toward me.
"We know our own preferences, but what kind of books do you yourself prefer—you, who governs the omniscience of this vault? Containing all magic and forbidden knowledge as you do, surely you must partake in highly elevated and esoteric philosophical texts, yes?"
Apep also raised his face from his book and looked at me with deep interest.
"Slither... I am certainly curious. What a monster of omniscience personally finds 'interesting'."
I stopped the movement of my tentacles and fell into thought for a moment.
All of YGGDRASIL's data was in my brain.
From the theoretical formulas of Super-Tier magic capable of destroying the world, to the transmutation circles for the elixir of immortality—everything was lined up with equal value.
However, if asked what book I personally "liked," my answer was already decided.
I extended an ink tentacle and pulled out a single, thin book—not from the deepest section sealed by heavy magic circles, but from a perfectly ordinary wooden bookshelf near the front.
It was bound in cheap cloth and carried absolutely no magic power.
I made the book levitate between them and presented the title on the cover.
"...『The Elven Method: How to Brew the Perfect Afternoon Tea』?"
Ra read the title aloud while blinking his golden eyes. The heat emitting from him caused the book to dry out slightly, rustling with a dry sound.
Apep brought his giant snake face closer and flicked his tongue out as if to catch its scent.
"...I sense no magic power whatsoever. No curses, no poison, not even a defensive spell placed upon it. It is merely... a scrap of paper, is it not? Tawil, is this your idea of a joke?"
"It is no joke. It is one of the books in this vault that I love reading the most."
I answered seriously. I carefully turned the pages with a tentacle and opened it to a specific entry.
"Look at this. It contains extremely detailed procedures: 『The tea leaves must be plucked on the night of a new moon and dried in the shade for three days,』 and 『The temperature of the hot water must be maintained just below boiling, where the surface of the water shimmers faintly.』"
"And what of it? Even if one follows such procedures, it will not yield temporary stat increases or status ailment recovery effects. It is utterly worthless."
Ra tilted his head, thoroughly perplexed.
"That is exactly what makes it good, Ra."
I spoke, blinking my hundreds of pupils all at once.
"We were created to pursue efficiency, strength, and systemic numerical values. How much slip damage Apep's poison inflicts; how much armor Ra's light pierces. The vast majority of the knowledge in this vault is merely a means to seek out such 'Results'."
I affectionately stroked the thin book floating in the air with my ink fingertips.
"But this book is different. It expends this sheer volume of words solely 'to brew delicious tea.' It possesses zero combat capability and zero magical value. ...It is pure empty space. Amidst the knowledge of YGGDRASIL where absolutely everything was quantified into numbers, these useless descriptions are, to me, the most luxurious reading material of all."
Hearing my passionate explanation, the two giant gods fell completely silent for a few seconds.
Eventually.
"Slither... Hiss... Kukuku, ahahahaha!"
Apep let out an eerie laugh that seemed to echo from the bottom of his stomach.
"The useless is luxurious, is it?! To think that the monster of omniscience is sitting there in ecstasy over how to brew tea that doesn't help in combat in the slightest! That's a masterpiece, Tawil Balah. Even though your appearance is more ominous than anyone else's, inside, you're surprisingly just like a pacifist old hermit!"
"Do not laugh, Serpent of Gluttony."
While chiding Apep, the corners of Ra's golden beak had relaxed slightly.
"...However, I can understand. We, too, are entities that have deviated from mechanisms that simply burn enemies as commanded. Having the leeway to enjoy the 'useless' unconstrained by stats... perhaps that is exactly what intelligence is."
Saying so, Ra dropped his gaze back to his epic poem.
"Though, I would still rather read the Fall of the Valkyrie than how to brew tea."
"I think I'll look for a slightly bloodier book. Hey, Tawil, is there a sequel to that 『Anatomy Record』 from earlier?"
"There is. Volume Two is 『The Efficient Drying and Pulverization of Slime Organisms』, but will you read it? It's a title that would make Lord Herohero faint if he heard it."
"Slither, that sounds perfect. Bring it out."
I moved a tentacle, materializing the book Apep requested from the database, and tossed it to him.
Silence visited us once more.
The sound of pages turning, the quiet breathing of the giant serpent, the faint heat haze emitted by the golden wings.
It was a silence filled with gentle white noise, where each entity enjoyed their own time.
Remaining suspended in mid-air, I continued to gaze at the pages of 『The Elven Method: How to Brew the Perfect Afternoon Tea』.
I have no sense of taste, nor a digestive system. I will likely never be able to brew the perfect tea described in this book, nor taste it, for the rest of my life.
But that was fine.
Because spending time quietly drifting in the sea of knowledge alongside these terrifying, yet somehow good-natured neighbors was, for the current me, the absolute best Tea Time.
Until the time Ainz Ooal Gown visits this vault someday.
Our deep, peaceful reading circle will continue.