Right now—
I hold back.
Not because I don't feel enough—
but because I feel too much.
Because I know
once I stop controlling it—
this won't be subtle anymore.
This won't be hidden
in jokes and glances.
This will become real.
Visible.
Undeniable.
And maybe
you're not ready for that yet.
Maybe we're still
in this space
between almost
and actually.
But listen—
one day…
I won't hold back.
One day
I'll say everything
I've been keeping quiet.
I'll look at you
without hesitation.
I'll close the distance
without second-guessing.
And I won't pretend
this is something small.
Because it isn't.
You aren't.
And when that day comes—
I don't want you
to be surprised.
I want you
to understand
that everything
I didn't say before—
was real all along.
Just waiting
for the right moment
to be spoken.