The second floor of Hogwarts Castle housed the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom. Today's lesson was a joint session for Slytherins and Ravenclaws.
Before class officially began, Harry and Malfoy were already trading cynical remarks about their new professor.
"What can Lockhart possibly teach us? He couldn't even beat the two of us in a duel," Malfoy sneered.
"I don't know," Harry admitted, flipping through his assigned "textbook." "But he's a well-established author, so he must know something, right?" At least the novels are entertaining enough, he thought.
Cassandra sat at the front of the classroom, also flipping through one of Lockhart's novels. She wasn't preparing for class, though; she was merely passing the time. I've barely attended any classes since last year anyway. It doesn't matter whether Lockhart is any good or not. Tom will just give me extra help.
Hermione, however, was diligently taking notes. She believed that anyone capable of writing such impressive works must be a powerful wizard.
The students sat quietly, waiting.
Then, a familiar voice echoed from the doorway. "Gilderoy Lockhart, Order of Merlin, Third Class, honorary member of the Anti-Dark Force League, five-time winner of Witch Weekly's Most Charming Smile Award—but I don't like to talk about that."
Lockhart, dressed in outrageously flamboyant robes, strolled into the classroom, flashing his signature, dazzling smile.
But, unexpectedly, Lockhart didn't continue to sing his own praises. Instead, he gestured dramatically toward the doorway and shouted, "Rejoice! Defense Against the Dark Arts is about to welcome the wizarding world's most powerful wizard, the future ruler, the epitome of elegance and strength… Professor Tom Riddle!!!"
A swirl of black mist entered the classroom and coalesced into Tom. He promptly punched Lockhart, sending him sprawling.
Did this guy say all that? I'm embarrassed for him!
Lockhart, dazed, mumbled from the floor, "Professor… why did you hit me?"
Tom had decided it was inappropriate for the students to call him "Master," so he had instructed Lockhart to address him as "Professor Tom" in front of them, as he had before. But now, with Lockhart's flamboyant introduction, the gesture seemed ridiculous.
Lockhart pushed himself up, forcing a strained smile. "I'm your new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. As you know—"
Bang!
Tom kicked Lockhart, sending him crashing back to the floor. "Enough nonsense! Begin the lesson!"
"Yes, Professor! Right away, Professor!"
Lockhart, seeing stars, scrambled to his feet, shook his head, and hurried to the corner of the classroom. He retrieved a large cage covered with a red cloth.
"My duty is to teach you how to deal with the most disgusting monsters in the entire magical world…" Lockhart announced, hands clasped behind his back, gazing down at the students. Tom stood silently to the side, observing.
"Soon, you will face your deepest fears within these very walls…" Lockhart patted the cage beside him. "But, don't worry. As long as I'm here, you'll be perfectly safe."
Hearing Lockhart's words, many of the students tensed. Even Harry could hear Malfoy swallowing nervously beside him.
"I must ask you not to scream, as it will only anger them…"
With a flourish, Lockhart ripped the red cloth off the cage.
Malfoy, seeing the creatures inside, smirked dismissively. "Cornish pixies?"
"…"
Is he kidding me? Harry stared at Lockhart, incredulous.
"I told you this guy couldn't teach anything worthwhile," Malfoy muttered.
Hermione didn't seem too bothered. It didn't really matter what she learned, as long as she could learn something new.
Cassandra wasn't paying attention. Tom was giving her private lessons, so she had no time to care about this farce.
"Freshly caught Cornish pixies," Lockhart declared. "Devilish little blighters, they are."
Despite Lockhart's attempt to sound impressive, the students burst into laughter. They thought he was making a joke.
Lockhart simply smiled. "Alright, let's see how you deal with them."
He opened the cage.
"Hahahaha…"
The grinning Cornish pixies exploded from the cage, wreaking havoc throughout the classroom.
"Wait! Stop! Those are my textbooks!"
"Ouch! What are you doing!"
"tonic! My tonic!"
"…"
The classroom descended into chaos. Two students were hoisted up to dangle from the chandeliers.
Harry and the others tried to stop the pixies with spells, but the creatures were too agile. It was proving extremely difficult for students who hadn't yet mastered wide-range spells.
Hermione, remembering a spell she had learned, prepared to cast it when…
Tom pointed his wand, freezing all the pixies in mid-air. With a flick of his wrist, he sent them hurtling back into their cage.
Bang!
The cage slammed shut automatically.
Lockhart, sprawled on the floor, wandless, pushed himself to his feet.
Tom walked over, looking at him, speechless. "Don't you know your own limitations? Don't try to show off if you can't handle it."
"Uh…" Lockhart chuckled awkwardly, clearly embarrassed.
"That's all you've got? What else did you prepare?" Tom asked, wondering if that was the extent of Lockhart's lesson plan.
"There's more! I also prepared a little test!" Lockhart's eyes lit up. He rushed to a cabinet in the corner of the classroom and pulled out a stack of papers.
"Ahem… I'm very grateful to Professor Tom for his help earlier, but I was going to intervene as well, of course…"
Sensing a dangerous look from Tom, Lockhart quickly changed the subject. "Well, there will be a test now, but don't worry. It's just to see how much of the book you've understood."
With that, Lockhart began distributing the test.
When Harry and the others received their papers, they were dumbfounded.
"What's Lockhart's favorite color?"
"What's Lockhart's biggest accomplishment to date?"
"What's Lockhart's secret ambition?"
Harry and Malfoy exchanged bewildered glances, mouths agape.
Cassandra, holding her test paper, looked at Tom questioningly.
Tom simply walked over, snatched the test from her hand, crumpled it into a ball, and tossed it aside. "This is useless. We might as well not bother."
Lockhart, standing nearby, didn't dare to object and could only watch as the other students took the exam.
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