"Did she really mean it?"
I lay back on my bed, phone resting on my chest as the thought crept in slowly.
"Or was she just being polite?"
I let out a breath, closing my eyes.
"That's unfair," I muttered. "She listened. She didn't argue. Why am I questioning her?"
Because I've seen this before.
Because people say things they don't mean when they're trying not to hurt you.
Because sometimes "I'll try" really means "I don't know how."
I opened my eyes again, staring at the ceiling.
"I should trust her."
And yet…
I didn't fully.
The next few days passed quietly.
Too quietly.
Michele didn't avoid me. Not exactly.
But something had shifted.
It was subtle. Almost invisible. The way she smiled a second too late. The way her words became shorter. The way her silence felt… heavier.
"You're overthinking," I told myself.
But I knew the difference.
I always did.
Still, I didn't say anything.
Maybe because I was afraid of what she might confirm.
Maybe because I didn't want to break what little we still had.
So instead, I stepped back.
Just a little.
"If she needs space, I'll give it to her," I whispered one afternoon as I watched her from across the room, laughing softly with someone else.
She looked fine.
Better than fine.
"She'll be okay," I added, though I wasn't sure if I was talking about her or myself.
And just like that, I left.
Not dramatically. Not in a way anyone would notice.
Just one step back.
Then another.
"I'm sure she won't feel alone," I told myself as I walked away. "She'll find her own people. She always will."
But even as I said it, something inside me tightened.
Because Michele had never been the type to reach out first.
She stayed quiet.
She waited.
And I had always been the one who moved first.
"So if I stop…"
The thought lingered, unfinished.
Weeks passed.
Then months.
Life moved forward the way it always does.
Assignments. Conversations. Days that blurred into each other.
And somehow, without realizing it… we stopped talking.
Until one day, in March, my phone lit up again.
"Assalamualaikum. Lusi, are you busy?"
I froze.
Michele.
I stared at her name on the screen, my heart reacting faster than my thoughts.
It had been months.
And now, suddenly… this.
"Waalaikumsalam," I typed back, my fingers moving almost automatically. "Hey… this is new. What's going on, Michele?"
I added a small smile at the end.
Something light.
Something normal.
But inside, nothing felt normal.
The reply came faster than I expected.
"Can we meet?"
That was it.
No explanation.
No context.
My chest tightened.
"Meet? Why?" I typed, then deleted it.
Too direct.
Too suspicious.
Instead, I wrote:
"Sure. When?"
A pause.
Long enough to make my thoughts spiral again.
Then her message appeared.
"Today. If you can."
Something wasn't right.
I could feel it.
"Is everything okay?" I typed before I could stop myself.
This time, the reply didn't come immediately.
Seconds passed.
Then a minute.
Then more.
I stared at the screen, my grip tightening slightly around my phone.
Finally… her message appeared.
"No."
Just one word.
And suddenly… everything I thought had already ended…
felt like it was only just beginning.
Some meetings begin with laughter.
Others begin with a question you are not ready to hear.
"Just wait. You'll be curious."
Michele's message popped up with a teasing tone that didn't quite match the weight of her last words.
I stared at the screen for a second, a small laugh slipping out despite myself.
"Curious? After disappearing for months?" I muttered under my breath.
Still, my fingers moved quickly.
"Now you've got me curious. Fine. I'll meet you. Where?" I typed, adding a confused emoji that barely covered the sudden rush in my chest.
It felt strange.
Unexpected.
Michele was not the type to reach out first. Not like this. Not after everything that had been left unsaid between us.
"Maybe it's nothing," I whispered, trying to calm my thoughts. "Maybe I'm overthinking again."
But I was already standing, already reaching for my bag.
Anything felt better than staying home.
Lately, even the walls there felt heavier than usual. My parents' voices, sharp with frustration, filled spaces that used to feel safe. Not always directed at me, but close enough to make me careful with every word I said.
I learned to stay quiet.
To avoid.
To leave before things turned into something I couldn't take back.
"Better to step outside than say something I'll regret," I murmured, slipping on my shoes.
My phone buzzed again.
"Let's meet at our usual place."
I paused.
Of course.
"Okay. I'll be there," I replied, a small smile forming despite everything.
The usual place.
It sounded simple.
But it wasn't.
On the way there, my thoughts refused to stay still.
"She's going to tell me something," I said quietly to myself.
But what?
A part of me tried to guess.
Maybe she had moved on.
Maybe she met someone new.
Maybe this was her way of telling me she was finally okay.
"That would be good," I whispered, though something in my chest tightened at the thought.
"Too fast, though…"
I shook my head lightly.
"Or maybe I'm just slow at letting go."
By the time I arrived, the sky had started to soften into late afternoon light. The familiar place greeted me like nothing had changed, like time had been kind enough to leave it untouched.
But people change.
Even when places don't.
And there she was.
Michele sat on the bench, slightly hunched forward, earphones in, her gaze distant as if she was listening to something far beyond the music.
For a moment, I didn't call out to her.
I just stood there.
Watching.
"She looks the same," I thought.
But something felt different.
I took a step closer.
"Michele."
She didn't hear me.
I reached out, gently tapping her shoulder.
She flinched.
Her head turned quickly, pulling one side of her earphones out as her eyes met mine.
For a second, she just stared.
Like she needed to make sure I was really there.
"Lusi…"
The way she said my name…
It didn't sound casual.
It didn't sound light.
It sounded like relief.
I forced a small smile, trying to ease whatever tension had suddenly formed between us.
"Wow. You scared me," I joked softly. "Since when do you ignore people calling your name?"
She gave a faint smile in return, but it didn't quite reach her eyes.
"I didn't hear you," she said.
We stood there for a moment, neither of us sure how to start.
Strangers, almost.
In a place that used to feel like home.
"So," I said, slipping into the space beside her on the bench, "you said I'd be curious."
I glanced at her, trying to read her expression.
"What's going on?"
She didn't answer right away.
Instead, she pulled out her earphones completely, wrapping them slowly around her fingers as if buying time.
"I didn't know how to say it over text," she said finally.
Something in my chest tightened again.
"Say what?"
She inhaled slowly, her gaze dropping to her hands.
"I thought… if I saw you in person, it would be easier."
"It doesn't look easier," I said quietly.
That made her let out a small breath.
Almost a laugh.
Almost.
"It's not," she admitted.
The air shifted.
Heavier now.
I leaned back slightly, trying to steady myself.
"Okay," I said. "Then just start somewhere."
She nodded.
But didn't speak.
Seconds passed.
Then more.
"Michele," I said, softer this time. "You're scaring me."
She looked up at me.
And for a moment, I saw it again.
That same expression from the day at the park.
Fear.
"I'm leaving sooner than I told you."
My breath caught.
"How soon?" I asked.
She swallowed.
"Tomorrow."
Everything inside me stopped.
"Tomorrow?" I repeated, my voice barely above a whisper.
"You didn't tell me it was that soon."
"I couldn't," she said, her voice breaking slightly. "I didn't know how."
A thousand thoughts rushed through my mind all at once.
All the time we didn't use.
All the words we didn't say.
All the silence that suddenly felt like a mistake.
"And that's not all," she added.
I closed my eyes for a second.
Of course it wasn't.
"What else?" I asked, forcing myself to stay calm.
She hesitated.
Long enough to make my chest tighten again.
Then she reached into her bag.
And pulled something out.
A small envelope.
She held it out to me, her hand trembling just slightly.
"This is why I asked you to come."
I stared at it.
Didn't take it.
Not yet.
"What is it?" I asked.
Her eyes met mine.
And this time, there was no hesitation.
"Something I should've told you a long time ago."
The world felt too quiet.
Too still.
Slowly, I reached for the envelope.
And somehow… before even opening it… I already knew.
Whatever was inside… was going to change everything.