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Chapter 30 - Guilt

"Onii-chan. Wake up."

Zenjiro slowly opened his eyes. The flat, white ceiling filled his entire field of vision. The morning light cast sharp, harsh shadows across the plaster. He blinked twice. He did not move his head. 

"Onii-chan, are you awake?" Liora asked. Her voice broke the quiet morning air. 

He did not answer her right away. He couldn't.

The incredible heat hit him instantly. Liora was still lying directly on top of him. Her body pressed entirely flat against his ribs. The heavy sandwich of her bare thighs clamped tightly around his right leg. The exact middle of that sandwich burned against him. It did not move. It just rested there. It radiated intense warmth right through the thin fabric of his dark shorts. 

His throat went completely dry. He stared blankly at the bright ceiling. 

"Onii-chan!" Liora called out again. Her voice was much louder this time. The sharp volume startled him. 

Panic arose fast. He scrambled to find his voice. "Yes," he said quickly. "I'm awake."

Liora dropped her forehead heavily onto his collarbone. She let her full head weight rest against his skin. The sudden action caused her lower body to shift. Her knee pulled upward slightly. Liora's right thigh pushed hard against the middle part of his legs. 

He felt it perfectly. The incredibly hot territory rubbed directly against his bare right thigh. Only a tiny, thin layer of fabric separated them. The slight shift created a light, agonizing friction. They both rubbed together. 

The movement froze Zenjiro completely. The heat flooded his mind. He couldn't think about the consequences at this moment. He couldn't analyze the terrible danger of the situation. His thoughts completely shut down. He just felt the burning warmth spreading through his lower body. 

"My head hurts so much," Liora complained. Her forehead rested right around his collarbone. Her voice was incredibly dry and raspy. "And it is way too hot."

Zenjiro recovered a fraction of his breath. "We should get up."

"No," Liora whined loudly. She dropped her head right back onto his shoulder. She clamped her arms much tighter around his ribs. She squeezed him like a heavy vice. "My legs feel like heavy lead. I cannot move them. Just lie here for five more minutes."

She didn't know about the damp seal from the middle of the night. She didn't know about the liquid. She didn't realize the intense heat between their legs was entirely inappropriate. She just thought they had a messy, uncomfortable sleep. She was just a grumpy, hungover girl avoiding the bright morning light. 

"We have class," Zenjiro stated. "It's the second day of school."

"I can't stand," Liora groaned into his neck. "My whole body feels too heavy."

Liora didn't know the truth. Zenjiro was dying inside from the intense pleasure. He had just woken up. The girl he did inappropriate things to last night wasn't even complaining about their tangled bodies.

She didn't even move away. Her guard was completely down. She simply didn't care about their highly inappropriate position at all. 

"Your breath is terrible, Onii-chan," Liora grumbled. 

Zenjiro knew exactly why. It was the cheap beer from the kitchen. He smelled her breath too. Hers was equally stale and sour. He kept his mouth shut about it. 

"Then get off me," Zenjiro said. "I need to brush my teeth."

She didn't move an inch. Zenjiro tried to gently push her off his chest. Liora tightened her grip even further. She dug her fingers hard into his gray shirt. 

"Five minutes is about to end," Zenjiro said. "Let go."

"NO," Liora ordered. "Stay right there."

"But—"

"No but," she interrupted sharply. 

Zenjiro went completely speechless. The intense pleasure spiked again. He worried he would completely lose control of himself. The psychological thrill twisted in his stomach. He had done something highly malicious in the dark. The victim had no idea. She sounded completely unbothered by his body. It brought a very different, dangerous kind of arousal. 

Then Liora asked the one question he was completely terrified to face. 

"By the way, Onii-chan," Liora asked. Her voice was muffled against his shirt. "Why are you here on my bed?"

Zenjiro panicked instantly. His heart hammered against his ribs. He deployed his prepared excuse without missing a single beat. 

"Remember I carried you last night?" Zenjiro said quickly. "When I put you down, you grabbed me. You clung entirely to my body. I couldn't move at all. It's your fault, you know."

Liora lifted her head. Her face hovered dangerously close to his. A mischievous, childish smile touched her dry lips. 

"Oops. My bad."

Zenjiro's eyes dropped. He focused entirely on her mouth. He smelled the stale morning breath and the lingering beer. He didn't care at all. He just stared at her lips. He remembered the damp seal. He remembered the falling liquid. 

"Thanks for always being here for me, Onii-chan," Liora whispered. Her tone turned incredibly soft. "I bet you guarded me the whole night to keep me safe. Because of your care, I did not get that bad nightmare again. You are the best brother in the world."

She forced her aching muscles to work. She lifted her upper body. She moved her lips directly toward his forehead. 

The upward movement caused the heavy friction again. Her right leg dragged across him. He felt the intense, burning sensation gliding directly upward along his rigth leg. The incredibly hot territory rubbed against his thigh one more time. The soft and burning sensation destroyed his focus. Liora's messy blonde hair brushed lightly across his face. 

She pressed a long, firm kiss right onto his forehead. 

"What was that for?" Zenjiro asked. His voice shook slightly. 

"It's for admiration," Liora said. She smiled down at him. "You might not know, but you're really cool, Onii-chan. You can solve any problem in an instant."

"It's not that big of a deal," Zenjiro mumbled. 

"It is a big deal," Liora countered. "Not anyone can do that."

She collapsed back down. She returned to her previous position. Her heavy torso rested entirely on top of his body again. 

"Let's not go to school today, Onii-chan," she muttered into his shirt. "My head really hurts. My body is so heavy."

She closed her eyes and went straight back to sleep. Her breathing leveled out into a slow, steady rhythm. 

Zenjiro breathed a big sigh of relief. She really didn't care about their position. Skin contact was an everyday occurrence for them. This time was vastly more intimate, yet she still didn't bat an eye.

He realized her guard was totally down around him. Liora categorized him entirely as a safe entity. She believed he would never do anything malicious to her. 

The realization hit Zenjiro hard. His sister trusted him completely. She felt safe in his arms. But what he actually did to her in the dark was entirely twisted. A heavy, crushing guilt settled deep into his stomach. The dark thrill faded.

The cold reality of his actions replaced the intense pleasure. He lay completely still under her sleeping weight. He stared at the flat white ceiling. 

Hours passed in total silence. The morning sun climbed higher in the sky. The bright light baked the small bedroom. The temperature rose steadily. Zenjiro finally closed his tired eyes. He drifted into a heavy, exhausted sleep. 

Noon arrived. The loud chime of a distant clock tower echoed down the street. 

Zenjiro woke up. His mouth tasted like dry ash. He blinked the heavy sleep from his eyes. A few minutes later, Liora woke up too. They were still locked in the exact same tangled position. Her right leg was still securely wedged between his legs. Her head still rested heavily on his right shoulder. 

"Onii-chan," Liora groaned. Her voice was flat and tired. "I'm hungry."

"Let's find some food in the kitchen," Zenjiro said. His throat felt like rough sandpaper. 

Liora finally rolled over to the right. She completely vacated his chest and legs. The heavy heat vanished instantly. The sudden absence of her body weight left him feeling cold despite the warm afternoon air. 

Zenjiro felt the intense numbness in his right arm and both legs. The blood flow rushed back into his cramped muscles with a sharp, painful tingling. The heavy pins and needles locked his joints tight. He did not move at first. He just lay flat on his back and waited for the painful sensation to pass. 

Liora sat up on the edge of the mattress. She stretched her arms high over her head. She popped her stiff shoulders. She lowered her arms and paused. She tilted her head slightly. 

Sniff. Sniff. 

"What's that weird stench, Onii-chan?" Liora asked. She frowned deeply. She looked around the messy bedsheets. 

Zenjiro sniffed the warm air. He smelled it instantly. A sharp, distinct odor hung heavy right above the mattress. He froze. He shifted his hips slightly against the cotton bedsheet. 

He felt it.

Down below him, the thick fabric of his underwear and the front of his dark shorts were completely wet. A cold, slightly sticky dampness clung directly to his bare skin. The moisture soaked entirely through the layers of clothing. It pressed uncomfortably against his thigh.

Did I actually pee my pants? The panicked thought hit his mind like a heavy stone. He was eighteen years old. How could his bladder fail him like a little kid? He had never experienced a shameful accident like this before. The intense, agonizing heat from the entire morning had completely overwhelmed him, and this humiliating mess was the pathetic result.

He scrambled blindly. He stood up from the bed incredibly fast. He turned his back to her instantly to hide the massive, dark stain spreading across his shorts. He kept his posture completely rigid. He walked away quickly toward the open bedroom door. His bare feet slapped loudly against the wooden floorboards.

"I'll look if there is food," Zenjiro called out quickly over his shoulder. He did not look back at her face.

He stepped out into the hallway. He left Liora sitting entirely confused on the messy mattress.

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