"Why would they? This has nothing to do with me!"
"The cursed sword that was supposed to cause a massacre disappeared, and no one died. Logically, who else but the Celestial Knights, who oversee the Giosa, could have handled it? The conclusion writes itself."
"Are you saying Commander Yurien is suspected of suppressing the cursed sword that was sent to Roaz?"
"It's a far more reasonable suspicion than believing that a count's daughter just happens to have a unique constitution that lets her handle a cursed sword without consequence. And then there's the fact that you became his squire on your very first day. Taken together, it would be stranger to think there's no connection."
There was no refuting it. Echi let out a groan. Nicole sighed and continued.
"There are factions within the Empire that quietly support the Third Prince. Even though Yurien himself has no interest in the throne. But given his popularity, his reputation, his command over the knights, and the sheer military power of the Celestial Knights Order, both the Crown Prince's and Second Prince's factions have no choice but to keep him in their sights."
"In other words… Commander Yurien has grown too powerful to simply be left alone."
"Exactly. Whether he wants it or not, he has very few real options."
Nicole raised her fingers one by one.
"He can accept the engagement and submit to the Crown Prince. Or he can use Azenka and the Celestial Knights to resist the Empire."
"..."
"If he chooses resistance, it leads to war. The first to suffer will be the Roaz family. Already suspected of having ties to Yurien. Even if it doesn't escalate to open war, Roaz will be exploited somehow. Leverage, or bait."
Echi's face went pale.
Nicole added in a detached voice, "So we should hope he quietly accepts the engagement and hands his leash to the Crown Prince. That's the most peaceful outcome."
Silence.
Nicole, apparently thirsty, reached for her teacup, found the tea cold, and excused herself to use a small spell to reheat the pot. She sipped unhurriedly, giving Echi time to process.
Echi's mind was in turmoil. The first thing that surged up was fury, deep, searing, the kind that even ValderGiosa, for all his love of killing intent, might have found alarming.
Whether the cursed sword had been sent by the Second Prince's faction or the Crown Prince's faction, she wanted to destroy them all. And the knowledge that she could actually do it. That was what made it so hard to hold.
Instinctively, she ran through the math: the scale of magic forces and royal guards she had fought in her past life. She could do it. She might collapse from mana exhaustion afterward, but if she struck fast enough.
[You can do it, so why hold back? It's revenge! They're the ones who brought you into all this. Let's go kill them! Wipe out the witnesses too and there's no cleanup]
The cursed sword, reading her mood, chattered eagerly. Echi glanced at her right palm, gloved over the mark.
[They sent me, so dying by my blade is only fitting. Come on. Don't you want to see the blood of the people who put you through all of that?]
That last sentence was what brought her back.
Kill witnesses just because they saw something?
A chill crawled up her spine. Echi pressed her fingers against her forehead.
Just now, she had been naturally considering killing mages and royal guards who had nothing to do with any of this. Just for the sake of revenge. I've lost my mind.
Royalty never stands alone. To reach a royal, she would have to cut through guards, attendants, everyone in between. She wasn't an assassin. While she could approximate one to a degree with mana and training, she was nowhere near capable of a true imperial assassination. Slaughter was possible. But..
[Master, you're only hesitating because of the red-haired woman, aren't you? You're going to do it, right? Let's...]
This isn't a battlefield where it's kill or be killed. If she did that, it would be a massacre. What would make her different from the demon she once was?
Rationality returned. Echi pushed mana into the engraving on her right palm.
[Ow! Ow! That hurts! When are we going? Today? Tomorrow?]
She clenched her fist and pushed again. Her mana ground against the sword's.
[Ouch! Ah! Fine! I get it, you're telling me to stop! Tch.]
This was not the same as Ian. Ian had directly attempted to kill someone close to her. In that moment, if she hadn't been there, Baraha would have certainly died.
But royal guards and palace attendants were simply people doing their jobs.
She knew too well what it meant to take a life. That was why, in this life, she had resolved never to cut someone down without a reason that held.
Echi closed her eyes and drew a slow breath.
'Why did I go through everything I went through to change this? Don't drown in anger. Don't be consumed.'
Gradually, her rationality resettled. As the tide of fury and killing intent receded, new thoughts came through.
The mastermind behind the cursed sword being sent to Roaz. Whoever that was, Emperor, Second Prince, or Crown Prince. Could be killed without hesitation if she ever confirmed it.
But she didn't know which of them was responsible. And even if the Imperial Guard came for the Roaz family, she would handle it. But that hadn't happened. Not yet.
Should she slaughter them all preemptively, out of anger, on the chance that it might happen someday?
She didn't want to become a demon again.
Echi pressed her eyes shut and breathed.
'Why did I suffer through all of that to get here? Don't let yourself drown. Don't be consumed by bloodlust.'
Her reason returned fully. As the rage subsided, new thoughts surfaced. What should she do?
As Nicole said, the best course was to wait and hope Yurien accepted the engagement. Then, once she knew who had ordered the cursed sword delivered to Roaz, she could plan deliberately. She had no intention of forgiving that person. Even if it turned out to be the Emperor himself.
'Yes. Hope the engagement proceeds. Find the culprit. And then take my revenge.'
Even as she reached that conclusion, a deep resistance stirred inside her.
He would have to get engaged. He would have to get married. A cold, sinking feeling settled in. A dull ache. A sorrow she couldn't quite name spread through her.
Like watching someone else take up RanGiosa, the holy sword she could never touch, with easy hands. The feeling of watching someone claim something she had never been permitted to even reach.
Echi looked down at her right hand in a daze. In the years she had spent gathering Giosa, she used to often just stand and look at RanGiosa. She could never touch it bare-handed.
She would wrap cloth around her fingers just to move it, set it against something, place it on the ground. And then she would stand there and look at it.
An untouchable sword. An untouchable person. A forbidden thing.
But she had always, truly, wanted to...
Something was building. The feelings she had forced back for so long pushed through the walls she had built around them.
Why didn't she want him to get engaged? Wouldn't his engagement protect Roaz? Was it pity for the life he was being forced into?
Yes, she pitied him. His circumstances, his history, everything she could piece together from fragments, filled her with sorrow. She wanted him to be happy.
But if he didn't get engaged, her family could be in danger. And wasn't her family the most important thing?
Peace. A peaceful life. Happiness.
She remembered the strange question he had asked her after the swearing ceremony.
'If there was something you wanted, would you sacrifice your peace for it? Would you accept being caught in chaos?'
Had he been asking about himself? Wavering between submission and resistance? Was "chaos" a reference to the war that would break out if he refused to bow to the Crown Prince?
Then what was it he wanted? What was so important that he would trade his peace for it?
'…Then what do I want? Why do I feel this resistance, even knowing the logical answer, even knowing my peaceful life might be at stake? What is it I actually want?'
Why had she been shaken when she heard about his fiancée? Why had she been angry at the ceremony? Why did she keep wondering what he was thinking, how he saw her? Why didn't she want him to remember the past? Why did she feel nervous standing before him? Was it guilt? No. It wasn't only guilt.
Why was she so afraid that she might be wrong whenever she saw his expressions? His smile?
What was she afraid of being wrong about?
'That he might love me.'
Why was that thought so terrifying?
'Because it's too... too unbearably... a happy thing to believe. So happy that realizing it's false would be crushing. And it has to be false. It's impossible for him to love me.'
And if he does love you, would you be happy?
'Why do you even need to ask. Because I...'
She loved him.
She had finally reached the truth she had been trying so hard not to look at. The feeling that had been hovering at the edge of everything she felt finally crested and flooded through her. Like a sandcastle giving way under a wave.
Echinacea forgot to breathe.
In front of the bloodstained fountain, an emotion she had thought long buried had quietly taken root deep inside her. Now that root was fully exposed.
In her most despairing moments, the only person who had ever truly seen her and believed in what he saw. Those blue eyes that had stayed with her through a long, painful, lonely fight.
Even as he was destroyed by his faith in her, he had never cursed her.
The way he looked at her. The unexpected warmth of his hand on her shoulder. The consideration he showed. The scent of ginger tea. The tension between them. His unguarded smile. His worry. The desperate embrace. The shaking voice. The expression caught between grief and joy.
Every moment that had made her waver. Every small thing he said and did that had stayed with her.
She had told herself she couldn't afford to love, and so she didn't. But that was self-deception. Feelings don't obey logic. Ignoring them doesn't make them disappear. Deciding to erase them doesn't make them go away.
Her feelings had never broken. She had only convinced herself they had, out of fear of their weight, their consequences, the changes they would force.
Echinacea Roaz had never stopped loving Yurien de Harden Kyrie.
From the moment he first found her inside the demon of the cursed sword, through all the years that followed, through the reversal, her love had not died. It had only grown deeper roots.
She could no longer pretend not to see what she had barely managed to overlook before.
Echi clapped a hand over her mouth. Then, a moment later, her face went scarlet from her neck up.
Nicole, startled, set down her teacup.
"Echi? What's wrong?"
"…sister Nicole."
Echi's voice wavered, half on the edge of tears. Nicole's eyes went wide. She had known Echi since childhood. She had seen her get irritated plenty of times. But she had never heard her sound like this.
Flustered, Nicole pushed aside her cup and came around to look at Echi's face.
"You said you weren't feeling well. Do you want to rest? I only told you because I thought you should know, but it can wait. The cursed sword situation is already enough, I shouldn't be piling more on you. Roaz's troubles are mine too"
"Unni, what do I do?"
"…What?"
I think I love him. The one I shouldn't love.
But the words stayed inside her mouth, tumbling silently.
She couldn't say them aloud.
Echinacea curled in her chair, pressing her burning face against her knees.
Her heart pounded so hard it felt like it might crack open, and underneath that, an overwhelming fear gripped her.
Excitement and terror, wound together.
Nicole, still flustered, rubbed her shoulder, asking over and over if she was all right.
It took a long time before Echi calmed down enough to come up with a plausible excuse for what had come over her.