"Huh?"
"Something… strange, or unpleasant, perhaps…"
A cautious question, as if stepping onto ice that might not hold. Hesitation in the trailing edge of the words.
She wondered what expression he was making. Was he blinking nervously, the way he had in the tent after the monster subjugation? She wanted to know — but she couldn't look up. She'd rather sink into the ground.
She had no idea how to handle this new, acute awareness of her own feelings. All she could do was feel the heat spreading from her chest, reaching her face and fingertips and the soles of her feet.
As the feelings that had been held back for so long began to pour over their banks, they flooded her thoughts and left her unmoored.
"Echinacea?"
[Hey — are you falling asleep standing up?]
She had drifted without answering. Yurien called her name, puzzled. ValderGiosa nudged her. Echi barely pulled herself together and opened her mouth.
What had he asked? Her head was spinning. She'd already forgotten. She answered haltingly.
"S-Sorry. I didn't catch that."
"…I was asking if anything had upset you."
His voice trailed off slightly at the end, sounding faintly discouraged. Overwhelmed by her own state, Echi didn't notice. She shook her head quickly.
"No. Nothing happened."
"Really? Did you… meet someone?"
He swallowed a name and rerouted the question. Echi was confused.
Had someone upset her? Was he talking about Brad? But how would Yurien know? Did the club dispute reach him somehow? Maybe Brad's group had caused enough trouble for the representative—
Thoughts moved through her in an instant and she blurted out a response.
"If you mean the club dispute, we settled it with a duel. It wasn't that upsetting."
"…A club dispute? What do you mean?"
"Isn't that what you were asking about?"
"No, I meant—"
They kept missing each other. Flustered, Yurien collected himself and spoke again, more carefully.
"I was asking if you encountered someone other than that. Someone who isn't a cadet."
"Someone who isn't a cadet? No, no one like that."
Who on earth was he talking about? Echi was internally puzzled. She heard a quiet exhale from him.
"Then that's fine. …Are you feeling better?"
"Fully recovered. If you need me to resume squire duties immediately, I can."
"No, nothing like that. Make sure you rest properly. I'm sorry for taking up your time."
Formal words. She assumed he would turn and leave. But he moved as if to go — and stopped. His gaze lingered again on her lowered forehead. She still hadn't once looked up.
Yurien asked in a low voice:
"Echinacea. Do you dislike facing me?"
It echoed what he had asked her in the stables. But this time, his voice carried a different weight. Quieter. Tinged with something like sadness. The faint tremor in it made something tighten inside her without warning.
She looked up before she meant to.
"I don't dislike it. It isn't that—"
The moment her eyes met his, the words stopped.
A face focused entirely on her. The soft flutter of his lashes. His exhausted gaze, carrying something close to sorrow. His blue eyes wavered like a rain-soaked sky. His brows slightly lowered, he asked quietly:
"If it isn't that you dislike me — then why won't you look at me?"
His expression, as if wounded, was devastating.
This is bad. That was her only coherent thought.
Now that she was aware of her feelings, looking at him was too much. She had no defense against something like this.
Her face burned from her chin to her forehead, going a vivid red. Whatever rationality she had was swept away.
She opened her mouth without knowing what she was going to say.
"Because… you're beautiful."
"....."
[…Hey. Did you eat something bad?]
ValderGiosa asked in an uncharacteristically hesitant tone. Right in front of her, Yurien's eyes went wide. His mouth dropped slightly open. An awkward silence.
Only then did Echi come back to herself and realize what she had just said.
'Beau — what? I've completely lost my mind.'
She wanted to disappear. What was Rakia Giosa doing with its time? In her previous life, something this embarrassing would never have happened.
Echi yanked her gaze away from his eyes. Her expression crumpled as if she might cry. She actually wanted to cry. And then — a quiet laugh escaped him. Yurien pressed his hand to his mouth and chuckled.
Echi buried her head and stared intently at the lace of her dress. She was going to die of embarrassment. Somewhere near her ear, the cursed sword clicked its tongue. Damn sword.
She kept her head down until he stopped. Which meant she didn't see it — the realization dawning across his face, or the resolve that slowly settled into his expression.
When he steadied his breath, his voice still carried a trace of amusement.
"Echinacea."
"Yes! I'm sorry, my lord. I lost my head for a moment—"
"No, it's fine. More importantly—"
Yurien paused. He seemed to be working something out, his gaze on the middle distance. Without realizing it, Echi glanced at the sharp line of his profile.
He turned to look at her. She flinched and looked away before he could catch her staring.
"The day after tomorrow, I need to leave Azenka's outer region. It may take some time — possibly quite a long time. The journey could also be dangerous. It will conflict with the academy's ranking tournament as well." A brief pause. "Even so — would you like to come with me?"
"…What?"
She hadn't expected it. Yurien kept his expression composed.
"I had originally planned to go alone. But if… you don't find my company uncomfortable, I would like you to accompany me. This isn't an order. It's a request. If you'd rather not, you don't have to."
"What kind of mission is it?"
"I can't explain the details right now. I understand it's difficult to decide immediately. If you're willing to come, let me know by tomorrow. If I hear nothing, I'll take it as a no. And again — you're under no obligation."
It was a careful, tentative offer. He lowered his eyes as he finished, as if afraid of her answer.
The moment she saw that — Echi answered before she could stop herself.
"No — I'll go. It's only natural for a squire to accompany their lord on a mission."
And she immediately regretted it.
'Wait. What if Yurien is testing me — whether I'm the cursed sword's demon? Before finalizing the engagement, he might want to confirm whether I pose a threat.'
The thought hit like a blade. The feelings she had only just understood went cold in an instant. The same aching sensation as staring at something she could never reach.
But just as the sinking feeling was about to swallow her — Yurien smiled.
A bright, boyish smile. His cheeks faintly flushed. His eyes crinkling softly.
Echi's mind went blank.
"Thank you."
He said it with unmistakable joy, and immediately continued, as though afraid she might take it back.
"Then be ready to depart by ten on the day after tomorrow. The journey will take at least a week, possibly up to a month. Prepare accordingly. If you need anything, request it from the administrative officer."
"…Yes, my lord."
"I'll be waiting, Echinacea."
He said it warmly, then turned and walked away.
Echi stood there, watching him go. She had just made an enormous, reckless decision. A dangerous one — one that risked exposing what she was.
Her stomach twisted with anxiety.
But strangely — she also felt happy.
Her rational mind refused to return. The only thing left in it was his smile.
As long as she wasn't caught, maybe — no, but there was the engagement. And the circumstances he was trapped in—
'I don't know. My head isn't working right now.'
[Master, you're acting so strange. Why are you going with him? You should be avoiding him, not agreeing to go off alone together! What if you get caught?]
"I don't know, so don't ask me."
[You made the decision! What do you mean you don't know? Oh — wait — are you planning to take him somewhere quiet and kill him? That's actually a great idea! Too many eyes in the Order, but somewhere secluded — ouch! Ow! Hey! What are you doing?!]
Echi channeled mana into her clenched fist. The cursed sword wailed and protested all the way back to the dormitory, but she didn't let up until she was inside.
Even then, the heat in her cheeks refused to subside. Alice was so worried at the sight of her she asked if the fever had come back.
The next morning, Echi woke up and immediately wanted to take back everything she had agreed to.
'What was I thinking? Why did I say yes?'
She knew exactly why, which made it worse. The real problem was that if the same situation happened again, she still wasn't sure she'd say no.
Because his expression had been so desolate when he asked why she wouldn't look at him. Because she was afraid of him making that face again.
Because when he smiled — so brightly, so much like a boy — it was enough to make yes worth saying.
'That kind of expression should be illegal.'
She buried her head in her pillow, clutching it. Her pink hair scattered messily over the white sheets. She absently curled a strand around her finger, lost in thought.
'Am I always this weak to beautiful things? Or is it just because it's him?'
The first person she had ever fallen for happened to be unreasonably beautiful, so she had no way of knowing which it was.
He was tall, and though lean, built like a knight through and through. His features were delicate in a way that made the word beautiful unavoidable, regardless of how clearly he was also something dangerous.
'Still — what on earth possessed me to say it out loud…'
"Ugh!"
The memory resurfaced. In frustrated embarrassment, she accidentally pulled her hair too hard and yanked out several strands.
She stared at her hand.
Then sighed deeply.