Day 17 – "Pehla test… aur asli darr ka saamna"
Subah ke 5:50 baj rahe the.
Aaj Sakshi alarm se pehle uth gayi… par is baar reason habit nahi tha.
Nervousness.
Aaj pehla revision test tha—Maths.
Usne bed se uthte hi feel kiya ki uska heart thoda fast beat kar raha hai.
"Yeh normal hai…" usne khud se bola.
Par body phir bhi tense thi.
Morning – Pressure Start
Sakshi table pe baithi aur last-minute revision start kiya.
Formulas… steps… shortcuts…
Sab dekh rahi thi.
Par jitna wo revise kar rahi thi, utna hi lag raha tha—
"Kuch na kuch reh gaya hai…"
Yeh thought dangerous hota hai.
Usne book band ki.
"Ab bas. Jo aata hai, wahi likhungi."
Yeh bolna easy nahi tha… par usne khud ko force kiya.
School – High Tension Atmosphere
Aaj school ka environment bilkul different tha.
Sab ke faces pe stress clearly visible tha.
"Kuch bhi yaad nahi aa raha…"
"Main toh blank ho jaunga…"
Riya bhi panic mode mein thi.
"Sakshi mujhe kuch samajh nahi aa raha 😭"
Sakshi ne uska haath pakda,
"Tu sab jaanti hai… bas panic mat kar."
"Tu kaise itni calm hai?" Riya ne poocha.
Sakshi ne halka sa smile kiya,
"Andar se main bhi panic kar rahi hoon."
Dono thoda hans diye.
Before Exam – Silent Moment
Exam hall mein sab baith gaye.
Paper distribute hone se pehle ka woh 2 minute ka silence…
Sabse heavy hota hai.
Sakshi ne aankhein band ki.
Deep breath li.
Aur dheere se bola—
"Jo aata hai… wahi enough hai."
Test Begins
Paper haath mein aaya.
Usne turant pura paper scan kiya.
Pehla question—easy.
Doosra—manageable.
Teesra—thoda tricky.
"Okay… itna bhi scary nahi hai…"
Uska confidence thoda wapas aaya.
Mid-Test Panic
Half time ke baad ek question aaya jisme wo atak gayi.
Usne 2–3 baar try kiya… par answer nahi aa raha tha.
"Yeh kya hai… yeh toh aata tha…"
Heart fast beat.
Haath thoda cold.
Panic start.
"Main sab bhool gayi…"
Yeh thought aaya.
Turning Point -
Us moment pe Sakshi ne pen rakha.
Aankhein band ki.
Aur kal wali line yaad ki—
"2 minute waste nahi hote… mind reset hota hai."
Usne 30 seconds ke liye deep breathing ki.
Phir dobara question dekha.
Is baar usne slowly step by step try kiya.
Aur—
Answer aa gaya.
Wo shock hui.
"Main panic ki wajah se nahi kar paa rahi thi…"
Last Minutes
End ke 10 minutes mein usne poora paper review kiya.
2 chhoti mistakes correct ki.
Aur jab bell baji—
Usne pen rakha.
After Exam – Reaction
"Paper kaisa gaya???" Riya almost chillayi.
"Theek… actually achha," Sakshi ne honestly bola.
"Same! Par beech mein main panic ho gayi thi," Riya ne bola.
"Main bhi," Sakshi ne smile ke saath admit kiya.
Aman Joins
Aman bhi aaya.
"Kaisa gaya?"
"Better than expected," Sakshi ne bola.
Aman ne smile kiya,
"Good. Tum handle kar leti ho situation."
Yeh line Sakshi ke liye important thi.
"Shayad main kar leti hoon…" usne andar hi andar socha.
School ke baad – Light Feeling
Aaj school ke baad Sakshi ko ek light feeling aa rahi thi.
Na overthinking…
na regret…
Bas ek satisfaction—
"Maine try kiya… aur handle kiya."
Ghar – No Overanalysis
Ghar aake mummy ne poocha,
"Paper kaisa tha?"
"Achha tha," Sakshi ne calmly bola.
Pehle wo over-explain karti…
Aaj nahi.
Evening – No Guilt Zone
Aaj usne thoda rest liya.
Thoda music suna.
Aur next subject ke liye light revision ki.
No pressure.
Night – Diary Entry (Big Growth)
Aaj diary entry powerful thi.
> "Day 17:
Aaj pehla test tha… aur main panic hui.
Par main wapas control mein bhi aayi."
Phir usne likha:
> "Main perfect nahi thi… par main break nahi hui.
Aur shayad wahi sabse important hai."
Last lines—
> "Darr ab bhi hai…
par ab main darr ke saamne khadi ho sakti hoon."
Last Thought
Light off karte waqt Sakshi ne aankhein band ki.
Aaj ka din important tha.
Usne realise kiya—
Confidence ka matlab darr ka absence nahi…
balki darr ke bawajood perform karna hai.
To be continued…