There are times you felt high and there were times were you felt so down, drained you couldn't dop anything but stare into the empty space to reflect, reminscing about the times when everything felt right cause now, everything went south opening my eyes to face reality.
How could i forget she was still in his life?There were times when i would see her around Ethan, She would purposefully call my line instead of his just to rub the stuff they had going on at my face. Dinner date with each other but i never really thought much of it because i sort of trusted him and i knew he wasn't actually intrested in her but now i was doubting it. Hell i was doubting if i could handle this whole thing too.
Since the last time we had sex it had been a great step but i guess i was all wrong. All i felt was hurt, betrayal from him. I wanted to know what was really going on between Selene and Ethan. I could'nt be fucking him when he was still with her. None of the stories he told me made sense although it was half true, that didn't answer to why they were going together more often, guilt looks he gave me when i went to his office but i wasn't having any of it. He choose her and i had to constantly remind myself that i didn't deserve all this.
How did it go from good to Bad with the flick of a finger? He was now more authoritative, demanding than before which made me hate him and at the same thing i didn't. i just wanted us back. I actually thought we were something. Foolish me.
Sometimes he would try to talk to me but when i asked why he was doing this to us, he never gave an answer. More like restraining himself from giving me answer. Over the week Nathy and Collins had talked sense into me and i now saw things in a different pattern. I was'nt going to fight to be in his life anymore, he was a grown ass man who doesn't need dictations. So he should know what he wants, but if he choose her then so be it but i'd be lying if i said i didn't feel a thing for him. His glances, his stares, the tone of his voice did nothing but made me arch for him but i wasn't going to show it. I missed him so much but this was the best option for us. I didn't want to know what selene had on him but if Ethan succumbs to her then that would be the end of me. I wasn't sure i would be able to stand seeing him with someone else cause that should be me!
Our daily routine was the main job as his assitant, Collect papers rom him, type and email them, run errands and go on lunck break.
Lunck break was the only time i was felt free and let out a laugh. And it actually took my mind off things all thanks to Nathy and collins. When i was with Ethan it was always straight to the point with orders and even when talking to me. Even sometimes when i tried to brighten up the conversation he would shut me off and go back to working.
Today would have been like any other day of the month until there was an unexpected guest. Or let's say expected for someone else. The elevator door opened to reveal the red haired maniquin walking through the hallway heading straight to Ethan office. I hated to admit but they actually looked good together. She looked perfect with her long legs and busty chest. The dress she was wore just flattered her shape. She ignored my presence as usual and i didn't even try to stop her since my boss told me not to.
I felt my stomach flip and i rolled my eyes in irritaion. I wish i could roll my eyes more than i already did when i saw a notification from him.
Mr Ethan.
Book a dinner reservation at Gloria Osterio for two at 7pm.
Ms. Bella
Okay.
Gloria Osterio was a top resturant known in milan. It wasn't just like any other resturant it had a romantic and really nice environment. I rolled my eyes internally as i pictured the two together having dinner.
I placed a call to their number and booked two seats under Ethan name. After that i sent sent the details to Ethan. Foolish me was waiting for another response but nothing came up. I dropped my phone in frustration after getting no reply.
After about 20 minutes. My mind momentarily asked. What are they talking about for 20 minutes? I dreaded the scenarios playing in my head so i continued with the work Ethan occupied me with.
Few minutes of typing, Selene walked out of Ethan's office, with a bright smile in her face contrasting my emotionless straight up look. as if it could get any better, Ethan appeared behind her holding her waist as they stepped out of his office. The sight in front made me want to close my eyes and remain blind to their sight and just go home, but i couldn't.
"Ms. Bella. You can go home now, that would be all for today." He stated with his cold office tone that he had never used on me before until selene came fully into the picture. Now he was concentrating all his attention on Selene who was looking at me with a wicked smile on her face. That ugly ass bitch.
"Okay sir." i stated with an unbothered tone and with that, they walked towards to the elevator. They were obviously going to get ready for dinner.
I sighed deeply, releasing the sudden ache and hopelessness i felt. With that i closed my laptop, took my phone and my bag from the desk as i took slow and empty strides to the elevator.
My ride home was just me staring at the road as i drove silently. As much as i wanted him, i knew i was loosing him day by day but something kept telling me there was more to this and he wasn't really attached to her. But i couldn't even trust my own judgement when i saw the way he looked at her. As soon as i got home i took my shoes off and slipped on my comfy slippers as i dropped my bag on the couch and headed to my room. I really needed to calm my nerves since i wasn't thinking straight so opted to take a shower. I undid the buttons of my shirt and unzipped my skirt, took of my bra and underwear and entered the bathroom. At home, i was the broken version of what i showed Ethan at the office. One where i could show all my emotions without being strong headed. Nathy and Collins had talked me out of sulking about him all night and i was really trying my best not to but no changes. Maybe just one day i'd forget he just exists but deep down i knew it won't be the that easy.