I could see him purposefully walking fast to avoid me. But why tho? There was nothing going on between us so why the sudden energy? Oops someone's jealous.
I followed him and when i got outside, i saw him opening the car doors to sit inside. I sat back in mine and he didn't wait a second before speedin g down the street. Jeez.
The atmosphere was tensed and we spoke no words to each other. He was facing the road while i seeemed to be paying attention to God knows what. through the window. After minutes of driving i couldn't hold it anymore. He was literally speeding and it gave me chills. I burst out in excitement as i held on to my seatbelt enjoying the cool air that brushed my skin.
I had been a fan of cars since when i was little. I always enjoyed late night rides with my father. Sometimes, we would just decide on a random day to just drive around with no where in mind. Just us. I've always been a daddy's girl since i was a baby so i loved every bit of him especially him behind the wheels. He would crack jokes just to make everything feel lighter. He was loved and cherished by all. In the night, he was a literal minac when driving. He handled the streering with so much expertise that you could literally entrust your life with him behind the wheels. Windows down, playing cool songs was a favourite thing to do with him.
"Can i turn on the music?" If we were going to be speed driving, at least he should play music to make it more.....lively.
He nodded with his eyes tuned on the road. He looked so majestic with his sharp chiseled jaw and his hair slightly messy. The breeze swept his hair but it still managed to give him that model look. No words huh?
Turning on the Radio, I blasted the upbeat Justin bieber song and focused back on the road.
I heard Ethan say something but i couldn't pin point what he said so i lowered the radio.
"You said something?"
"You're really going to respond to him aren't you?"
Is that why he was acting like this?. oh please..
"Of course. Why not?"
He didn't respond, instead he just nodded in acknowledgment and gripped the steering tighter. He had this cold look but i wanted to hear more from him.
"You've got any problem with that?" I asked focusing my attention on him.
"No." Ouch. I wasn't expecting him to say yes either but hearing the no from him so nonchalantly reminded me that he actually didn't care.
"We need to talk." I wasn't sure about everything that was going on yet but i knew he wasn't telling me something. No matter how much i tried, i always saw myself going back to him. I just needed an answer that would clear my doubts, make me sleep better or at least help me have a clear direction. I've pictured us without Selene coming into the picture and it was fine. The atmosphere in the car was so tensed and i knew this was had to be the right time to ask him. No more guesses.
"What's there to talk about?" He replied with his nonchalant tone again. Does he really not care?
"Ohh Ethan don't pretend you don't know what i'm talking about." I wasn't going to back down. "Everything went wrong all of a sudden and you're leaving with no answers as to why it is so."
"Bella if this is about Selene then stop." He said flatly.
Of course it's about her. You said you didn't feel anything for her but i guess that's changed now."
He didn't respond and just stared blankly at the road ticking his jaw.
"You love her right?"
I'm not going to answer that.
Why is it so hard. Just Yes or No.
I won't repeat myself.
"Ethan just tell me the truth. It's been eating me up everyday cause you once said she didn't mean anything to you but it doesn't seem like it anymore. Just answer and let me know where i stand or if .....i was ever even in the picture. Do you love her?" I was probably sure my eyes was getting glossy but i really didn't give a fuck right now. I just needed an answer.
After seconds of silence he said. "You trusted my judgement earlier. So why stop now?"
"What?" I was confused. "What's that even supposed to mean?"
"Bella everything i do is for a reason. If i tell you i had no intentions towards her and all of a sudden it doesn't look like it, then you should be smart enough to know there's a motive."
I felt relived. At least he wasn't into her but it still didn't make any sense.
"Did you ever put it in mind to at least let me know what's going on? Cause you've did nothing but played with my emotions over and over again for a month now and you're telling me you have a motive? ohh please."
His reaction told me his was sorry but he couldn't get himself to tell me what was going on. Then he manged to say, "Just trust me."
"You're keeping me in the dark and you're talking of trust?" I was pissed at him. "How did she suddenly become so important?"
"Bella, I understand how you feel but-"
"No you don't! You've been keeping me in the dark all these while, making me question myself, retracing back memories if there was anything i ever did wrong, Not a single night went by without a vague memory of you intruding my sleep! And all you have to say is that there's a motive behind everything you do? Oh please spare me that talk.
he looked spunned and was at loss for words.
"Ohh baby i didn't know you had to go through all that. I'm so sorry but i just can't tell you what it is."
We had already arrived at my place.
"First of all. Don't baby me and secondly, If you can't say it then it's fine, i meant nothing to you anyways. I hate to say this but you too look good together." With one last look at him, i reached out to open the door and got out.
From the corner of my eye, i saw him open his mouth to say something but he would close it. Nothing he was going to say would change anything anyways. But what if it did?
I didn't believe i was actually doing this but i had no choice. Selene still had something on him and if he couldn't say what it was then fine. A part was of happy that he had nothing special with her while the other part hated him for putting me in this situation. Why would he sacrifice what we had for his "motive"? Anything it was it had better be a good reason. I didn't bother cleaning up my tears. i just allowed them to fall willingly. When i reached my door, I turned a littleand saw Ethan's car just driving into the street. Why was he still there? I sighed and got in.